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Subject: to Zoe


Author:
Karl
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Date Posted: 16:27:06 02/16/26 Mon
In reply to: Zoe to Debra 's message, "Re: Yay for your plan!" on 14:15:05 02/16/26 Mon

I haven't been on here for a while and maybe you haven't either, Zoe. I remember your story. But I remember as far as you moved out and eventually took in your step-sisters and had a visit or two from your dad. How have things been going with you and Vi and the kids over the past year or two?

I'm glad to hear you thought my advice to you was good. I can't really remember what I wrote back then, but you certainly had a difficult situation with your mom and step-dad and that Baptist school with the principal who was jonesing for another chance to paddle you, and dealt with it admirably. Kudos to you!

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[> [> [> [> [> [> [> [> [> [> [> Subject: Re: to Zoe


Author:
Zoe to Karl
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Date Posted: 19:04:56 02/16/26 Mon

Karl,

Things have been mostly good. We had a rocky few months but after the girls and I have established a good rhythm where I can be the cool older sister as long as everyone behaves, which is almost all the time. Jo has also turned out to be a very talented and motivated student in a system that rewards that (and where it is socially cool to get As). Vi moved in with me for a while, and it was nice having a second parent but she's moved back east chasing better soccer. We have had some arguments about that but I think we'll be okish.

My stepdad and I have repaired our relationship to a degree I wouldn't have thought possible. Really when he's freed of the toxic environment/expectations of Baptistville, he's a good person. Apparently when they were hanging out together on his last visit he told Amy "he was going to tell on her to Zoe" if she didn't shape up," in a somewhat joking way. Unfortunately he has received a bad medical diagnosis, so I'm not sure how much long he will have--a couple of years at least, I think/hope, but you never know . My mom and I are not talking but that's perhaps for the best. I've left the ball in her court, and that is less mental load for me.

Because I was able to get almost 60 credits in high school and did an internship last summer, I'm able to graduate in May. I'm writing a capstone about experiences with modes of violence that is turning out to being a lot about spanking since people are willing to be interviewed about that. I'll share more when I've actually finished it. I have another internship lined up for the summer, and then I'll need to figure out what's next. Probably more study of some kind eventually, but there are too many things that appeal but nothing specific. Provided things are working with me and Vi will probably try to line up what I'm doing with her law school applications after some work next year since she has another year.

I do have to say the if my ex-principal runs into me in a dark ally he had better walk the other way, quickly
[> [> [> [> [> [> [> [> [> [> [> [> Subject: Re: to Zoe


Author:
Karl (to Zoe)
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Date Posted: 07:24:44 02/17/26 Tue

Glad to hear things have been working out well for you and your step-sisters and that even your step-dad seems to have come around to a saner outlook. I don't know what to say about your mother. From what you wrote before it seemed she was unwilling to acknowledge her own failings and blamed you as a scapegoat for everything.

Interesting that so many people are willing to be interviewed about spanking. But if you're looking for another, non-spanking, source for your treatise on violence, you could look into Bill Buford's 1993 book "Among the Thugs" which is about what he learned and experienced while hanging out with England's football hooligans. Of course "football" in England is what we call "soccer" in America. I haven't read it myself, but I had long thought it would be worth reading. Here's a blurb about the book:

"They have names like Barmy Bernie, Daft Donald, and Steamin' Sammy. They like lager (in huge quantities), the Queen, football clubs (especially Manchester United), and themselves. Their dislike encompasses the rest of the known universe, and England's soccer thugs express it in ways that range from mere vandalism to riots that terrorize entire cities. Now Bill Buford, editor of the prestigious journal Granta, enters this alternate society and records both its savageries and its sinister allure with the social imagination of a George Orwell and the raw personal engagement of a Hunter Thompson."


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