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>Dear David, > >This is an abomination! I won't ask you to risk a >spanking by asking your dad just to satisfy my >curiosity, but I would love to know why he thinks that >maintenance spankings would have any benefit on your >behavior. Maintenance spankings are the child >discipline equivalent of welfare (the dole, if you >will). If I have the choice of working hard to >produce widgets for a monthly wage of $X or sitting on >my butt and get paid that same $X by the taxpayers in >the 21st century equivalent of slavery, why, in God's >name, would I bust my butt making widgets? Likewise, >speaking of busted butts, if I'm going to get spanked >whether I behave myself or not, why behave? True, the >fact that the maintenance spankings will be worse if >you misbehave takes some of the edge off this >argument, but that only emphasizes the fact that >punishment must be in response to behavior to be of >any benefit. > >If you and your sibs are <i>earning</i> frequent >spankings by misbehaving, then it follows that you >consider that the rewards of behaving badly outweigh >the pain of the spanking that results. In other >words, "It's worth it!" I've gotten a few spankings >like that, but I don't make a habit of it. The way to >counter that is to up the ante of the <i>earned</i> >spankings to make it <i>not</i> worth it. More swats, >harder swats, worse implement (e.g., change to a fresh >cut switch), additional punishment (e.g., grounding) >or other bad things but only if you earned the >punishment(s) by misbehaving. > >Also, the opposite is also necessary: If you behave >correctly, even if it's just following the rules and >not putting out anything extra, you deserve a reward, >even if it's just a pat on the back and a verbal "atta >boy". Does your dad do that? If not, then he is >missing a great opportunity to improve your behavior >without spanking you at all. > >I hope that you can talk him out of maintenance >spankings. If not, maybe posting here on the forum >will, if you'll pardon the pun, maybe take some of the >sting out of the situation. Unload on us, that's what >we are here for. All the best... > >-Jerry
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