Re: Feelings about spanking -- Childhood Spanking Memories

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Subject: Re: Feelings about spanking

Author:
Frank
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Date Posted: 06:21:01 01/09/25 Thu
In reply to: jenny82 's message, "Re: Feelings about spanking" on 05:14:05 01/09/25 Thu

>They say "just talk to your kids", but with some kids
>(or people) it does not work. They need real
>(painful)consequences to learn.
>
>My father used to say (and only half-jokingly): Girls
>learn best with their bums. Although I never realised
>why this shouldn't apply to boys, it's not entirely
>wrong!

I agree. Of course it depends on the kid.

For little kids often lack the mental capability to even "understand". You cannot really "reason" with them, as their brain is really not yet capable of such functions.

But as you said, they understand "painful consequences". Now, this might be even just a very stern talking to, or a quick slap on the bum, without even being a spanking, depending on the kid.

For older kids or teens, it depends. Many kids, maybe most kids, will probably learn better through non-physical punishments and positive reinforcement, when they have some capability of reason.

However, some kids do not and might need a spanking to get their lesson.
I have plenty of anecdotal evidence that "just talking" does not work in certain occasions and with certain people. Frankly I feel it applies to adults too. (LOL - actually where I live now, judicial caning *is* a thing and we have virtually no crime here, although it's also because it's impossible to get away with it due to cameras being everywhere)

On the other hand, dishing out spankings (let alone brutal ones) for every odd infraction, will probably normalize it and the kids will just get used to the fact they get spanked, and this will might just have the opposite effect and make them worse.

Hence for me spanking should be a sort of "last resort".

> Although I never realised why this shouldn't apply to boys

Oh it applies to both sexes for sure.

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>>They say "just talk to your kids", but with some kids >>(or people) it does not work. They need real >>(painful)consequences to learn. >> >>My father used to say (and only half-jokingly): Girls >>learn best with their bums. Although I never realised >>why this shouldn't apply to boys, it's not entirely >>wrong! > >I agree. Of course it depends on the kid. > >For little kids often lack the mental capability to >even "understand". You cannot really "reason" with >them, as their brain is really not yet capable of such >functions. > >But as you said, they understand "painful >consequences". Now, this might be even just a very >stern talking to, or a quick slap on the bum, without >even being a spanking, depending on the kid. > > >For older kids or teens, it depends. Many kids, maybe >most kids, will probably learn better through >non-physical punishments and positive reinforcement, >when they have some capability of reason. > >However, some kids do not and might need a spanking to >get their lesson. >I have plenty of anecdotal evidence that "just >talking" does not work in certain occasions and with >certain people. Frankly I feel it applies to adults >too. (LOL - actually where I live now, judicial caning >*is* a thing and we have virtually no crime here, >although it's also because it's impossible to get away >with it due to cameras being everywhere) > >On the other hand, dishing out spankings (let alone >brutal ones) for every odd infraction, will probably >normalize it and the kids will just get used to the >fact they get spanked, and this will might just have >the opposite effect and make them worse. > >Hence for me spanking should be a sort of "last >resort". > >> Although I never realised why this shouldn't apply >to boys > >Oh it applies to both sexes for sure.

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