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Date Posted: 23:37:09 05/02/02 Thu
Author: Lost
Subject: advice

My g/f and I are having some difficulty and I was wondering if someone could help and give me some advice.

To start it all off, My g/f and I have been involved for almost a year and a half now, online. Now I know this isn't the best but I cheated on her more then a year ago. I fessed up and our love carried us through all the times that were to follow. As time went on, things were amazing, and we were actually talking about moving in and having kids and such. I cleaned up my act and I turned to God for the love that I felt I was missing in my life. *dismal past on my part* Now I do not go into chat, but we still communicate via Yahoo still. She feels it is too much temptation for me. I think differently, but this is not the issue that is concerns me. I am employed on the weekends and I use to work during the days until I quit my job due to unsafe work practices in the workplace amongst other things exmpl. they would have fired me after 3 months because they dont want to pay for my medical insurance. Well, when I told her this, she went off the deep end because I should have backed up this job with another before leaving it. This is true, but I stuck through the rough periods of my work thinking that I could make it through. Low and behold I ended up walking out of it. I had enough. I didnt want to get hurt and have to pay for it down the road, by not seeing her or being with her, cause as you know, if the government knows that you are on disability they will not let you in a country if they know you come to just milk the system cause ya can't work because of an injury. Anyways, when I quit my job, she said that she couldnt be with a person who is not going to be able to support her childern if anything happens to her. Now there is a possibility when we do have childern that this could be the result because of her medical history. She doesnt want her kids to be on welfare, and believe me, I would work at McDonalds if I had to to support my childern, for moving into a new country, myself, I would have to start all over. I told her that, and she really doesnt believe me. She said I would find some way out of a job. Now if I was in a situation of IF I had childern and IF SHE had childern then I would have stuck it out and looked for something else in the process. I do still work on the weekends, so its not a case that I dont have something already. Believe me Im not a quitter but she thinks I am. She also thinks with this new time away from a day job that I will get into trouble with chat and stuff. Well personally, I wouldnt cause I stay away from it, I dont need it. And thats the honest to God truth. She is the love of my life, and she says she still loves me. But the whole fact of the matter is, shes being really cold to me and non supportive of me, just cause she thinks Im gonna be a deadbeat father, which I swear to the Lord I will not be. I asked her if there was anyone else, and no there was not. It's like she just upped and walked outta my life. She doesnt want to talk till she thinks all this over. What to think I dont know, but I will tell everyone this. Our relationship was very very strong until this Tuesday Morning when I walked off the job. And now its gone to shabs. Can someone give me any advice? I am currently seeking employment at this time and Im going out to drop off resumes as of right now (like I have been doing). Please give me some advice, I love her with all my heart, and I dont wanna let go, but shes being really cold to me.

Thanks for your time,
Lost and confused

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