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Subject: haiku and tanka... please read and give constructive criticism


Author:
Jade

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Date Posted: 20:17:55 12/05/03 Fri

ship sails under moon
wave-tossed, gliding on silver
foam over deep waters

diamond dew shines soft
in the moonlight, silvery
each blade of grass holds
a precious gemstone dewdrop
silver diamonds are white fire

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Replies:
Subject Author Date
bump (NT)Jade18:20:40 12/06/03 Sat
Very nice, good descriptive words. Haiku is the only poem I can actually write good. XD But they're both luvverly poems. (NT)Jessie19:43:51 12/06/03 Sat
You're Japanese? (NT)Jade14:53:44 12/07/03 Sun
Cool! I love meeting people from other cultures. I don't remember, isn't 'konnichiwa' how you say hello? (NT)Jade19:33:39 12/10/03 Wed
Thanks! Konnichi wa or good night, I think the latter is a better choice. **yawns** (NT)Jade01:50:14 12/12/03 Fri
NT)Jade18:22:39 12/17/03 Wed
O-kaay. I hate it when that happens. Anyway, just think of what you want to say and find words to fit it. Don't worry if it seems illogical. (NT)Jade18:25:16 12/17/03 Wed
Kewlio, thanx! (NT)Vi20:06:41 12/27/03 Sat


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