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Date Posted: 20:28:32 01/16/02 Wed
Author: Jonathan
Author Host/IP: 204.32.70.117
Subject: Re: The reason I am sad...
In reply to: Sandy 's message, "Re: The reason I am sad..." on 07:27:48 01/16/02 Wed

>>>why would you want her back?<<<

Because I still love her... and because I am afraid of being single again.

>>>...would you be able to put all of this behind you and trust her again or would the pain be too great and always strain your relationship?<<<

Of course it would! I have once believed that time could forgive all wounds.

Let me put it another way... as a kid, I had to constantly try to keep my parents approval of me in order to keep off the streets. It's the same mentality. A child fears losing one's family, as an adult, the fear and shame of failure seems to grip me in this relationship. I think that for the first time... tonight... I think there is a link here... but I can't seem to grasp that idea well yet.

I feel lost as if I have no identity now. When married, I had a role to play. Now it is almost as if I have been thrown back into those dark days when identity was lost and all I had was a void inside. I don't know who I am anymore... I feel lost and vulnerable now.

>>>I tried putting a marriage back together after being cheated on and I just couldn't do it. Once the trust and security was gone, I couldn't get it back.<<<

I keep trying... I guess this is fantasy isn't it.


>>>I found someone else and I'm a lot happier.<<<

Will I ever be able to trust again? I can't see that far.

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