Very powerful imagery and self loathing; however, the last line turned everything around as though the bleeding was only in the mind.
"laughing thoughts of insanity
the thoughts which i will not let get to me!"
I take it that this line is supposed to be the most powerful of the poem. You've written in your usual small letters for the insecure feeling; but... the last line is the only one with the punctuation and it's a ! as though you're screaming it to yourself at the end.