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Date Posted: 18:51:24 09/05/05 Mon
Author: Elizabeth
Subject: Plastic Shamans, Crystal Twinkies & Wannabes

I've been watching someone for a while, who claims to be Indian, but obviously isn't. I feel it's time to expose him, and have written the following article. If you would take a few minutes, read it and critique it, I'd appreciate it. Thanks.

"PLASTIC SHAMANS, TWINKIES AND WANNABEES"

People who claim they have an ounce or two of ancestral Indian blood coursing through their veins, or no Indian blood at all, think they can pull the wool of the eyes of those who don’t know any better.

I know better.

The Indian community calls them “wannabes, crystal twinkies, or plastic shamans.” They want to be Indian so badly, they will take on the guise of being Indian. They are all over the Internet, and most have been exposed for impersonating an Indian. One only needs to do an Internet search to find them.

A real Indian doesn’t have a need to defend his or her “Indianist” to a non-Indian. A real Indian uses the language of his or her own tribe, if he or she even knows it. A real Indian holds his or her culture and spirituality close to them, because it’s been stolen, exploited, and twisted to meet non-Indian's needs. Real Indians know the names of their family members, ancestors, cousins, and when real Indians introduce themselves to each other, if they’re from the same tribe, naming their clan and family members, and the area they are from, is how they introduce and become familiar with each other.

Two important rules to remember - A real Indian would never discuss their spirituality on the Internet, and having a Native American ancestor does not make one Indian.

A wannabee’s indianist is based on what they’ve learned from other wannabes, or from reading books like “In the Spirit of Crazy Horse,” by Peter Matthiessen, “Bury My Heart at Wounded Knee,” by Dee Brown, “Lame Deer, Seeker of Visions,” by Richard Erdoes and John (Fire) Lame Deer, or “Black Elk Speaks,” told to John Neihardt by Nicholas Black Elk, or “Secret Native American Pathways” by Thomas E. Mails, or based on movies that perpetuate Indian stereotypes, such as “Dances With Wolves.”

Many people, who aren’t involved with the Indian community, don’t realize how many people now profess to be “Indian” as a sole result of the proliferation of books and movies that have either been published or produced in the last twenty years, unlike only a generation ago, when because of past injustices, if one had Indian blood, they either didn’t know it or hid it because it was considered to be a shameful thing.

Because of the increased awareness of the “suppressed” Indian, the “ecologically aware” Indian, the numerous books and movies portraying the “stoic” Indian in all his or her glory, it’s become “cool” to be Indian. There are wannabes who claim to be descended from one tribe, yet their proselytizing is based mostly upon another tribe’s culture, language and spiritual beliefs, usually one of the Plains Indian tribes, no matter from what tribe they claim to be, although I have personally met many who tried to tell me they were Lakota, which, next to the Cherokee tribe, is the most popular tribe from which to claim false or little known ancestry.

Now that more fake Indians have been exposed, some choose a lesser known tribe, and claim they are part of it. It might take a little longer to expose them, but rest assured, someone will expose them.

Plastic shamans, crystal twinkies, and wannabes use Lakota words like ta tanka, meaning buffalo, or Wankan Tanka, meaning great spirit, or hoka hay, meaning it’s a good day [to die], or hau kola, “hello friend”, or hang dream catchers, and cheaply made, beaded war bonnets from their rear-view mirror.

They attend Intertribal Powwows (originally given to the Plains Indians by the Omaha tribe), inipi ceremonies (sweats), and vision quests, all of which are based on the Plains Indian culture, when they’re not a member of one of the Plains Indian tribes, and most could not say or write a sentence of five words together in any Indian language. In fact, powwows are where you will find a proliferation of wannabes, plastic shamans and crystal twinkies, because that’s their only opportunity to be around “real Indians,” and they will exploit financially and emotionally those in attendance who don’t know any better.

Russell Means once said, "Just look at our powwows, those mockeries of our culture that shame us by fostering 'weekend Indians' with no knowledge of their grandparents' language, no appreciation for traditional Indian values, no links to the land. The powwow is the lazy way to be an Indian... .Wherever Indian people live, they have ripped off Plains Indian songs and have corrupted our traditional dances and ceremonial attire. They have stolen and adulterated my culture and have turned themselves into living parodies of my ancestors. Powwow Indians are Plains Indian wannabes, no different from New Agers who appropriate what is comfortable for them but won't live the lifestyle that created the trappings. They don't understand that a slice of pie isn't the whole pie — but they wonder why they are always hungry."

Fake Indians adopt a superior than thou demeanor; they only accept you if you buy into their sham, or claim to have Indian blood yourself. Those who are duped by these plastic shamans, wannabes and crystal twinkies are usually people who have heard that they had an ancestor who was Indian, but have no facts or information on which to base their Indianist. A fake Indian duping himself is one thing; but when he or she begins to dupe others, he or she needs to be exposed.

Those who play Indian disrespect and exploit Indian culture more than those who denigrate Indians, and are detested by Indians. It is such a huge problem in Indian Country, that in 1993 the Lakota, Dakota and Nakota nations formally declared war on those who exploit their culture and spirituality for financial gain.

Fake Indians are sadly searching for something to fill a void in their life, and if allowed, will only exploit others who also have a void in their life, something that is abhorrent to me. One can only hope they are all some day able to fill that void with something that is real, not fake; something that belongs to them, not others.

Think and say what you want about me, but beware of plastic shamans, wannabes and crystal twinkies. A bald eagle does not mate with a golden eagle, anymore than a non-Indian can become Indian. Wannabes, crystal twinkies and plastic shamans do not have your best interests at heart; only their own.

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