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Date Posted: 16/11/09 1:55am
Author: Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq. (Damn short of time and money)
Subject: Boxing Day special
Well the holiday season is upon us again, I am oft reminded of my dear old dad as he spit up blood and whisky this time of year. Brings back fond memories of midnight sorties out for coal to keep warm, poking about skips looking for anything useful.
Well this has nothing at all to do with all that rot, No none at all! This is the time of year I count my many blessings and review my vast holdings thinking of those less fortunate than I. Yes it’s time once again for the annual Shlockman pre-Boxing Day inventory clearance sale. Why wait till the last moment to make decisions as to what to give away, you can select from my many surplus items (many with fancy wrapping) for your Boxing Day pleasure.
One of the prime items I am surprised has not been bought in past years is the 1960 Cadillac coupe Deville, fine running condition, 429 cu inch motor with NOS injection for a bit of extra boost on the road. No bullet holes and the smell in the trunk from an unfortunate incident have dissipated and can only be noticed on very damp days at just over £ 2000 it’s a steal.
We also have a large assortment of handguns, revolvers, semi-automatics and a few home made. All of them are devoid of any serial numbers and most have had the barrels worked with a rattail file to prevent ballistics matches. Priced from a very attractive £ 10 to £ 200 depending on model. Quantity discounts available.
For some years I have been collecting packages from Meat Free Chicken Casserole which since the unfortunate incident with the poison exploding pen set I just can’t bring myself to open, all are in original wrapping although some may be damaged due to soaking in water or oil as a precaution, all reasonably priced.
Kneebreaker has donated part of his vast collection of brass knuckles some of which are over a century old, sure to please those on your gift list.
Many more items to be added, contact my office for a complete list and updates.
Sincerely,
Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq.
Shlockman, Sueman, Kneebreaker and Stall
Attorneys at Law
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