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Date Posted: 15/05/06 1:33pm
Author: MFCC
Subject: Professional Help Wanted : Dealing with bureaucracy
I need help in obtaining the following government forms -
* 34R56T "Application for the storage and collection of camel scrotums"
* 81E53F "Financial exemption for medical implantation"
* 93D41C "Funding Assistance for cross-species anti-rejection drugs"
* 21J49M "Post Operative Implant Counselling Subsidies"
* 41D69C "Human Body - Animal Tissue - Transplantation Authority"
These forms are required by a top secret new business venture formed about the bottom fell out of the penis enlargement market. FYI camel's have some of the largest testicles of all land mammals!
If anyone can assist in obtaining these forms, or knows the whereabouts of the departments where they can be obtained, please contact me confidentially via this forum.
MFCC
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Re: Professional Help Wanted : Dealing with bureaucracy -- Sir Ivan Ivankwoski,
15/05/06 8:41pm
I can help you with the above top secret government forms but a friendly word of advice if I may. "Never squeeze a camels scrotum`s, he`ll get the right hump!" But I digress. I found the forms you mentioned in a skip in Wandsworth two days ago and would love to let you have them - at a small price. I don`t want to give you a sob-story but I need some dental work done and can no longer get treatment under the national health. I had a dental checkup on Friday and Mr Objungha the Polish dentist said I needed a lot of work done and how much loose change do I have. Quite frankly I thought this was a bit of a cheek as he did`nt even try to make any small talk with me but no straight for the jugular, anyway, to cut a long story short MFCC I will sell you the papers for £375?
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Re: Professional Help Wanted : Dealing with bureaucracy -- Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq.,
16/05/06 9:55pm
My Dear MFCC,
I must warn you about the camels, our associates Vladimer, Zvonimir and Pankracije of Vladimer, Zvonimir and Pankracije Ltd have stumbled upon a discovery while looking for you in the Saharan Desert. It seems the boys good natured use of dynamite has caused several of these beasts to become carnivorous. While the ones we had have all been destroyed after eating Mr. Timothy Davenports wife and mum-in-law, many of the beasts are still roaming free. Sightings in North Surrey, and Louden confirm my fears.
I urge you to kill them before they get you and top you off with marzipan and yogurt. Don’t say I didn’t warn you. If your boys at K&CPS need help I think I could persuade Vladimer to fly over in his Sikorsky and fire a few air to ground anti-camel missiles your way.
Sincerely,
Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq.
Shlockman, Sueman, Kneebreaker and Stall
Attorneys at Law
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