Har har... -- Guardian's Cave

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Date Posted: 15:55:39 03/20/02 Wed
Author: Seqiro
Subject: Har har...

I've got a question for everybody. I know we discussed it a little while ago on what writing well is, but I'm still confused. I know what I think writing well is, but other people seem to have very different opinions. I checked the page that Elly gave in the posting school, and I find it a little disturbing that someone who says "tonnes" is giving out advice on how to write. So I made two little passages, I'm just curious as to which one you guys think is better. They have basically the same content, but I followed the 'tutorial' for the second one.

Her soft muzzle nipped the grass as the wind played with her mane. As she walked across the field, a melody played through her ears. With a tilt of her head she listened to the song of the wild ones.

Femme's labrums nipped the umbra of the loam as the wind played with her tresses. Madian loped 'pon terra, a melody played through darken'd doublets. With a tilt of craniul, f'mmora listened to the song o'the wild ones.

I don't mean offense to anyone, but I'm merely curious of the opinions.

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Replies:

Me? Again? -- Badhbh, 16:41:35 03/20/02 Wed
we-el... -- Morgan, 19:26:33 03/20/02 Wed
- Oh! -- Seqiro, 20:30:38 03/20/02 Wed
  - Hehe, mastication... -- Lykanthos, 22:12:06 03/20/02 Wed
    - Erg -- Lenore, 09:11:12 03/21/02 Thu
      - Ah. -- Badhbh, 12:36:03 03/21/02 Thu
        hmmmely -- Macha, 13:25:46 03/21/02 Thu
        Mastication.... -- Lykanthos, 15:01:45 03/21/02 Thu
        Morrigan's Wrath -- Morgan, 19:01:14 03/21/02 Thu
        Ya... -- Macha, 13:32:17 03/22/02 Fri
hrm -- Badhbh, 13:49:52 03/21/02 Thu
- I like badhbh's too... and thanx for the definition :) (NT) -- Macha, 15:11:07 03/21/02 Thu

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