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Subject: We are new to encopresis and scared Author: Susan [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ] Date Posted: Wednesday, April 23, 2025, 01:00: am Hello everyone, We are new to diagnosis of encopresis. Our 8 year old daughter has had issues with accidents for a couple of years now. We have had to do a few stints with pull ups and magnesium citrate to get her cleared out after abdominal x-ray showed impacted colon. The last few months she has visibly been caught standing with her legs locked and face turning red. I found you guys here searching for Home Nursing Care to come help me give her an enema next time she is caught holding. Out Doctor says we have to stop it right now or we are in for a long haul and we need to put suppository or enema in her as soon as we catch her holding. I'm new to the enema idea and really scared. [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]

Replies:

[> Subject: Re: We are new to encopresis and scared Author: Diane [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: Thursday, April 24, 2025, 10:44: am Susan I'm glad you found us. My daughter is just a little older than your girl. Struggled with bedwetting and had so many exams and tried so many things and were just beating our heads against the wall until a simple visit to a clinic for a tummy ache and throwing up we had a rectal exam and x-ray indicating that she was packed full of stool. My fault 100 percent for not knowing when my daughter had bowel movements. We cleaned her out and then she had to have a bowel movement every night before bed. Small bulb, plain warm water does the trick. Do not use Fleet enemas. The Doctors get perks for telling you to use store bought prepackaged enemas. NOT!!! It took many many weeks before the bed wetting tapered and then stop because it takes time for the bladder to recover from the stress it has been under for so long with pressure from the poop pushing against it irritating it. We only have to do an enema maybe twice or once most weeks but she is required to give me a bowel movement every evening. If you are afraid of how to do the enemas get Home Health Care nurses to come clean her out and show you how to do enemas. Then make her give you a bowel movement every evening. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> Subject: Re: We are new to encopresis and scared Author: Susan [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: Thursday, April 24, 2025, 02:00: pm Thank you so much for responding. She does also wet the bed about once a week. So do you think that is also because she holds back her bowel movements? I think I found the site that recommends what you are doing with your daughter. M.O.P. My husband and I have talked it over and we are going to go the rectal route recommended by our Dr. We haven't told her yet. It will be an awful scene I'm sure. She has recently become defiant to me and has temper tantrums. I know it is all from the stress of her holding back her bowel movements. We aren't fixated with why she holds back, she is a bright kid. It isn't that she doesn't know better. It is something much deeper psychologically but in any case the first step has got to be physically getting her on the toilet to have her bowel movements appropriately. I'm not able to find anybody other than my sister that can come help me. Husband can be here this weekend so our plan is to do the soapsuds enema and one or two rinse enemas like Shelly and others talk about. From what my research has found for me she almost certainly is pretty backed up and has got to get emptied before we start with the daily stooling. I'm expecting a huge fight. AV I read in the archives what you went through as a child and yet you come on here to support and encourage moms to use rectal treatments for holding back and that gives me encouragement that we are doing the right thing. And Kitten Paw even though you say you hate your enemas even now as a teenager you don't say that you feel it is assault or abuse or that your enemas traumatize you. Well gee, I don't like needles at the Doctor's office either but some medical things are just necessary aren't they? So we are planning on an afternoon of enemas Saturday. I certainly will come and let you all know how it goes because without what I learned reading your experiences and successes with rectal route I would not have the courage to do this. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> Subject: Re: We are new to encopresis and scared Author: AV [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: Thursday, April 24, 2025, 02:29: pm Hey Susan, Here is my understanding. I am a believer the colon puts pressure on the bladder preventing it from peeing. When a child lays down, the pressure is off, the child relaxes and sleeps and ultimately pees in the bed. Due to my past that you refer to, I use journaling to help. I am glad you found this site and plus keep us updated. Hopefully Shelly and kitten paw will respond and give more appropriate advice. The most important advice I can give is stay the course. Try to make this experience with your daughter as pleasant as possible but understand also she will probably hate it and fight it. Stay the course and let her know it is needed. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> [> Subject: Re: We are new to encopresis and scared Author: Susan [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: Thursday, April 24, 2025, 03:07: pm Well the reason I wanted RNs to come get us started on this path was because I know she is going to fight us. It has gotten increasingly harder to get magnesium citrate in her. It is only with threats of losing privileges that I can't get her to drink it and if she leaves the house she has to be in a pull up because she won't comply with the laxative trying to get her on the toilet. But when Kitten Paw explained how I can sit and someone grab her wrists and pulls her down over my left leg and I can clamp against the back of her legs with my right leg I know we can control her. It may take all three of us. It would be nice to sit her down and tell her how much I love her and worry about her and know that getting something put in her bottom by mom might be a little scary but I do it only because I love her and need to help her toilet herself appropriately. However, with her defiance lately and her temper tantrums I would just be lighting the fuse of a huge bomb that would explode about the time we tell her to get her bottoms taken off for us for her first ever enema. So unfortunately we are going to just have to ambush her. She knows nothing about enemas at all. Maybe she has seen the Fleet enemas on the shelf when she has been down the laxative aisle with me getting more magnesium citrate but she has no clue I have an enema bag with her name on it. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> [> [> Subject: Re: We are new to encopresis and scared Author: AV [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: Thursday, April 24, 2025, 03:53: pm Susan, Please keep us posted on the progress. Since it is her first, it will probably be a struggle. Having help is always good. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> [> [> Subject: Re: We are new to encopresis and scared Author: AV [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: Friday, April 25, 2025, 03:48: am Susan, The leg lock is a good method, I call it the “leg lock and loaded” method. The child is locked in place by the leg and the enema bag is loaded and ready to go. Since this will be your child’s first enema and you plan to surprise her, that has been coined as the “awe and shock” method. As a parent you know it has to be done and you awe and shock them with it. Advice to help for the awe and shock, my mom for example as I got order, your child’s age and older, would wait until my bath time to give me an enema. Right after bath, I was already in the bathroom and already nude. No fighting of getting clothes off. Having some help to hold the arms like your sister or husband will be great. You could even go in awe and shock her quickly by getting her over your lap, lock her legs, someone take her arms, have access to her bottom easily since it is after her bath, lube her up really well, and like you said, have an enema bag with her name on it loaded and ready to go. Hope all goes well and you get a good cleaning out of her. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> [> [> [> Subject: Re: We are new to encopresis and scared Author: Susan [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: Friday, April 25, 2025, 08:17: am I thought I could smell a pair of her soiled panties in the bathroom. I have found a pair hidden in there before. It took me a while. She had put them between two clean, folded, and stored on the shelf bath towels. This was just yesterday. I last got a magnesium citrate purge in her two months ago. She is not eating, has horrible breath, and now hiding destroyed underwear from me. It's time to clean her out and then demand a nightly bowel movement. Diane I got an 8 oz. bulb syringe for the nightly bowel movement when she needs help. I'm actually excited now to get started. This is so much more sensible than doing oral laxatives. Why do so many Doctors push oral laxatives on a child that holds back their bowel movements. Isn't that counterintuitive? Isn't that just giving them more practice in resisting the urge to evacuate? That is a great idea of catching her as she is getting out of the bath. We will have to get started early Saturday afternoon though because it is my understanding it may take her about an hour to get each of her three enemas into the toilet. She will be just lounging around in her bedroom playing video games in her pajamas all day so we will get her in position over my leg and then I can just pull her bottoms down enough to get access and then when she is on the toilet with her soapsuds enema I'll get them taken off of her. It's going to be a heart breaking experience for all of us but she has got to be stopped and our new Doctor is fully supportive of rectal only for this. And that just makes so much sense. Her school warned me that if she misses two more days of school she will have to do this year all over. If I don't have to go pick her up because she has messed herself until after she has been there for lunch time then it is not counted as a lost day. So we are in the clear with a clean out tomorrow and then a bowel movement every evening. I'm actually pretty pumped about it. I see hope for her. I don't see how it can fail. I will be getting a bowel movement from her every day. It's not rocket science. What's with the oral laxatives so many Doctor's are fixated on? Why do they have me force magnesium citrate down her throat, put her in a pull up, and then drop her off at school? Am I missing something? [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> [> [> [> [> Subject: Re: We are new to encopresis and scared Author: AV [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: Friday, April 25, 2025, 08:59: am Susan, You have a plan in place. It’s all about executing it now. I know Shelly ended up purchasing a long enema nozzle attachment so the enema would start deeper into the colon filling it up first and that seems to work for her two boys. The enema solution doesn’t need to be soapy. It can be plain warm water. Soapy enema will cause craps. It will be all about the breathing as she fills up. Hopefully Shelly and Kitten Paw will respond because they will have some amazing advice that will be helpful for beginners. Please let us know how it turns out and hopefully this will be a success story of a child that was helped through enemas and not laxatives. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> Subject: Re: We are new to encopresis and scared Author: Susan [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: Friday, April 25, 2025, 11:02: am Thank you so much for the encouragement. I've had a few conversations with our Doctor's nurse. She wants a soapsuds enema because our daughter may have a hardened large fecal impaction up in the colon that runs across to the other side. Is that the transverse section? I think so. Anyway she says we need the enema to be slippery for the first one to at first get the enema water to push past any lump and get above it and then to lubricate the colon for help getting any lump to move down to her bottom so it will come out. I've got a bar of goat's milk soap from our health food store. It supposedly will not irritate her colon but just make her first enema very slippery. And it won't make bubbles or foam which I understand is what causes some of the cramping from other enema soaps. Anyway that's what I've been told. The lady at the health food store says she was raised on goat's milk soap for her monthly enema growing up and she has five children who are raised with monthly enemas with the soap and she gets really good results for the first enema so that the rinses can then just finish bringing residual fecal matter out and of course rinse out the soap. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> Subject: Re: We are new to encopresis and scared Author: AV [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: Friday, April 25, 2025, 12:59: pm Susan, You’re on the right track. I was going to recommend goat milk soap but I wasn’t sure if you were going to be able to find any. Yes, goat milk makes the colon slippery without any cramps. I chatted with another person on another forum that used goat milk soap on her 3 girls (6, 9, 13 yrs old) and even her nephew (13yr), that was a funny story when she told it. Cleaned him out good, he got a goat milk enema and 2 rinses. This is going to be a good enema for her. She will not like it but will feel better afterwards. Please feel free in the future to journal your thoughts, concerns, enema experiences with your daughter. Getting your feelings and emotions out will help you as well. Can’t read how this goes. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> Subject: Re: We are new to encopresis and scared Author: Susan [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: Friday, April 25, 2025, 02:01: pm I know I'm getting ahead of myself but my 12 year old son has constipation issues when he eats too much dairy and has to have a laxative once in a while. When he has a bowel movement he invariably plugs the toilet. I've read all of Shelly's posts on how she was raised on maintenance enemas for colon health and how she has her two very young boys on weekly enema and how they have really adjusted well pretty quickly to actually looking forward to their enema each week. I wonder if I cleaned my 12 year old out weekly if we could get him to have a bowel movement a little more frequently so they aren't so huge. I'm guilty like Diane in that I don't make him tell me when he has a bowel movement but I think we should start. And also if his sister knew she wasn't the only one on weekly enema clean outs I think we might get better cooperation from her because she is going to go ballistic saying 'why does only she have to have an enema every day to make her have a bowel movement'. He certainly won't be too happy at first either but he is a very well behaved and delightful child and he won't give me any trouble like she is going to. He might get a little emotional at first with rectal intervention but it just isn't good to let him go so long that his bowel movements are logs that clog the toilet. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> [> Subject: Re: We are new to encopresis and scared Author: Shelly [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: Friday, April 25, 2025, 02:30: pm Susan, So happy you found us. I think you and AV have got it worked out well. You won't have any trouble getting her over your leg with the three of you there and once you have her clamped in and either Dad or your sister sitting on the floor and holding onto her wrists and you having your left arm free to rest on her back keeping her pushed down over towards the floor she literally can't move except to try to kick her feet but she will have nothing to kick. Sounds awful but she needs cleaned out and this has the least risk of somebody getting hurt and you can get her first enema started so fast like Kitten Paw says when she helps her mom, "she won't even realize what happened" it will be so fast. From reading my posts you know that I myself do enemas too. It's just something about getting raised on enemas, you can't get away from them. I also needed to try out the deep nozzle that we use for all of our enemas so I knew how best to get it rotated and moved around while getting it past the rectum and into the sigmoid. You really, if you can build the courage, need to do at least a rinse enema tonight when you get your kids to bed or first thing in the morning. You will learn so much on how fast to let the enema flow and that you may even have to stop the flow when you are feeling like you are going leak from the pressure. And just generally experience what an enema feels like so when she reacts or complains about cramping or pressure you will know what she is experiencing and what to say to her or do to help. Yes your son needs to stop going days without bowel movements and then plugs the toilet. He is heading for big trouble if you don't put a stop to it. They are emotional at first about enemas. But like Kitten Paw says "it's not like you are cutting a couple of their fingers off. It's Just an Enema!!" They just need to give you a poop regularly nothing more nothing less. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> Subject: Re: We are new to encopresis and scared Author: Bonnie's kid [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: Friday, April 25, 2025, 07:11: pm Susan, best of luck with your endeavors. I was raised by a mom and grandma who monitored and required a daily BM, as ordered by my pediatrician. No BM...yes enema. They didn't use laxatives etc. for my older sister and I. My younger sisters received some suppositories and this was likely due to a retirement of our pediatrician. His nurse Marge then worked for the adult's primary care physician. Enemas were still a common recommendation as I became a teen and then adult. I learned about enemas by age 6 and began to self administer. By the age of 12, I took care of my elimination without mom or dad unless a specific issue required their help. A bulb syringe could trigger a BM in many cases, but the enema bag became easier to manage as I showered or bathed. I resented mom when young and becoming self sufficient shifted some of those feelings as I was able to move past the embarrassment. Similar efforts were a positive for my sister as well. She ultimately became a nurse and assisted with our younger sisters. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> Subject: Re: We are new to encopresis and scared Author: Susan [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: Friday, April 25, 2025, 09:39: pm I appreciate the encouragement. I've informed my 12 year old son this evening he is on a no flush rule. If he has a bowel movement away from home I want a picture sent to my phone that minute. No picture, or if he flushes it doesn't count. I'll monitor him this coming week to see what he has going on and what his rhythm is. Then next weekend we will clean him out and they will both be on a daily requirement. I'm going to start them both on metamucil as Shelly has her border teen so that they will have no reason to not give me a daily bowel movement. My two are headed to bed shortly and I'm starting to get a little anxiety but I need to do an enema tonight so I know what I'm getting myself into with my kids and relate to what they are going to experience. My husband joked he is putting me on the daily bowel movement requirement too. I admit I am not daily at this time. Don't care to discuss it further. My children are my focus right now. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> Subject: Re: We are new to encopresis and scared Author: AV [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: Saturday, April 26, 2025, 03:03: am Susan, Find that right dosage of metamucil that will give them an urge to go and not cause them to have an accident. I think you are on the right track helping your children. I also hope emptying your daughter’s colon using the awe and shock and over the leg lock and loaded method will help with her behavior and attitude. My mom believed my “grumpiness” was a result of not having a bowel movement and she kept me regular. Like your son, I had what I called baseball bat movements. They were solid and hard and long. I believe now I was constipated for not going as often as needed plus my diet wasn’t the best as a child. I would recommend looking at your child’s diet. I know for me, drinking room temperature water from a bottle and eating a banana helps me. Please let us know the results of the awe and shock and leg lock and loaded turns out with your daughter. Plan it out and execute it. You already know she is going to put up a struggle, so be prepared to lock her down with those legs and someone hold those arms so you can have full access to filling her up. Once you put that first goat milk enema in her, it will probably deflate her and wear her out and you won’t have any problems getting the rinses in her. Your son is like collateral damage. His sister is getting him added to this routine. Yes, he needs a cleaning out as well for sure to start him with an empty colon and help with those logs. What you will learn, is your children will not be honest with you when it comes to letting you know their movements. It is best to have them on a weekly enema routine with the bulb and a monthly cleaning out routine with the bag. As their parent, look at it as your responsibility to take care of their health. Don’t want a hospital visit and bill. Expect it to be an emotional event because you love them and you don’t want to hurt them but especially with your daughter, you already know in advance, her awe and shock is going to be a struggle. Keep us posted. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> [> Subject: Re: We are new to encopresis and scared Author: Susan [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: Saturday, April 26, 2025, 06:22: am OOOh My Gosh you guys! So Husband made me take a 2 liter enema and the physical part, the sensations of taking the water in wasn't an issue but it was very emotional for me. I get how Kitten Paw says she hates the enema because it is her mother forcing her on the toilet to give her a bowel movement. It was like my Doula all over again. I am very secretive even now about my bowel movements. My Husband has never been anywhere near me when I have a bowel movement. I never have a bowel movement in a restroom where I can't lock the door. Yes I will delay a bowel movement for several minutes so I can get to a lockable bathroom or get home. No wonder my kids are having issues huh? They are mini me. They are not going to like this intervention. But what choice do I have? I am responsible for their well being and that includes seeing to it that they don't destroy their colons ability to function in a healthy manner. Yes AV I'm just going to low dose them on Metamucil to insure they have stool every day sufficient enough to give them contractions to evacuate so they can avoid having to have the bulb if they cooperate. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]