<font color=silver>(He clutched onto her as he would have as a little child.. she was the only solace and rock he had left in this world. For a few long moments all he did was sob, his body shaking with supressed emotions. The anger would come soon, it always did when he was hurting - he'd done so well in the army because of his ability to cover hurt with anger and use it to his advantage.* I can't do this without her.. *He groaned out, wanting to die and forget it all, but unable to think the thoughts with his son in the other room.. His energy was pouring from him into his tears, and he couldn't see himself happy ever again.*</font> -- .:Nikolai's Apartment:.

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Date Posted: 04:55:03 10/19/05 Wed
Author: Niko
Subject: (He clutched onto her as he would have as a little child.. she was the only solace and rock he had left in this world. For a few long moments all he did was sob, his body shaking with supressed emotions. The anger would come soon, it always did when he was hurting - he'd done so well in the army because of his ability to cover hurt with anger and use it to his advantage.* I can't do this without her.. *He groaned out, wanting to die and forget it all, but unable to think the thoughts with his son in the other room.. His energy was pouring from him into his tears, and he couldn't see himself happy ever again.*
In reply to: Niko 's message, "::Seems like just yesterday, you were a part of me:: ::I used to stand so tall, I used to be so strong:: ::Your arms around me tight, everything felt so right:: ::Unbreakable, Like nothing could go wrong:: ::Now I can't breath, Now I can't sleep:: ::I'm barely hanging on::" on 04:41:47 10/19/05 Wed

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She nodded a little bit, a low breath escaping her lips. "Yes you can sweetheart, she would want you too. She gave you that baby and she would trust you to take care of him..." She murmured softly, soothingly, just running her hand down his back slowly. "It's going to work out Niko, it's not going to be easy but it's going to work out..." She smiled softly, pressing a kiss to the top of his head. "She loved you very much, Niko, she would want you to grieve for her but then live your life fully for Ayden..." She couldn't see Niko ever being with anyone else after Fyre, they had seemed so perfect, so happy. Not that she wanted her son to be alone but it was hard to follow perfection.. (NT) -- Jewel, 04:58:00 10/19/05 Wed