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Date Posted: 13:49:48 06/02/02 Sun
Author: Zora
Subject: Re: Chapter 1
In reply to: Krystal 's message, "Chapter 1" on 18:20:37 04/25/02 Thu

Well, it's good, Krystal :) The main characters are sympathetic and human, and that's a real achievement, especially in fantasy. The scenario's pretty original, which is also damn hard in genre writing. You introduce the elements neatly, and it's well-paced although I found the transition from the practise to the scene with the council a little rushed, and the councillors not quite 'real'. My only real criticism is that the changes in point of view made my head spin; a change after just a paragraph or 2 is incredibly hard to pull off and requires a lot of cues in the writing, whereas you sort of lurch from one person to another. The usual recommendation to young or novice writers is not to attempt multiple POVs until you are very experienced; it's just too hard. I hope that doesn't seem harsh, I really liked the piece and I don't want to discourage you at all. *hugs*

I could post up a POV excercise if you want??

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