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Wed, Apr 22 2026, 14:59:08 [ Login ] [ Contact Forum Admin ] [ Main index ] [ Post a new message ] [ Search | Check update time | Archives: 1, 2, [3] ]

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Date Posted: Mon, Jun 12 2000, 13:49:31
Author: steve
Subject: Why did

Why did


1/ Why did God create woman?

To carry semen from the bedroom to the
toilet.

2/ If the dove is the bird of peace, what
is the bird of true love?

The swallow

3/ How do you annoy your girlfriend during
sex?

Phone her.


4/ Why do women fake orgasms?

Because they think men care.

5/ What is the definition of "making
love"?

Something a woman does while a guy is
fucking her.

6/ What should you do if your girlfriend
starts smoking?

Slow down and use a lubricant.

7/ What's the difference between oral sex
and anal sex?

Oral sex makes your day; anal sex makes
your hole weak [whole week.]

8/ How many sexists does it take to change
a light bulb?

None, let the bitch cook in the dark.

9/ What's the difference between
pre-menstrual tension and B.S.E?

One's mad cow disease, the other's an
agricultural problem.

10/ Why does the bride always wear white?

Because it is good for the dishwasher to
match the stove and refrigerator.

11/ What do you say to a woman with 2
black eyes?

Nothing, she's been told twice already.

12/ How many men does it take to open a
beer?

None. It should be opened by the time she
brings it in.

13/ If your wife keeps coming out of the
kitchen to nag at you, what have you done wrong?

Made her chain too long.

14/ How do you turn a fox into an
elephant?

Marry it!

15/ What is the difference between a
battery and a woman?

A battery has a positive side.

16/ What are the three fastest means of
communication?
 
1) Internet
2) Telephone
3) Tel-a-woman


17/ Why do hunters make the best lovers?

Because they go deep in the bush, shoot
more than once and they eat what they shoot.

18/ How are fat girls and mopeds alike?

They're both fun to ride until your
friends find out.


19/ How is a woman like a condom?

Both of them spend more time in your
wallet than on your dick.

19/ What should you give a woman who has
everything?
 
 A man to show her how to work it.
 
 20/ How are twisters (tornadoes) and
 marriage alike?
 
 They both begin with a lot of blowing and
 sucking, and in the end you lose your house.
 
 
 21/ Why does a bride smile when she
walks up the aisle?
 
 She knows she's given her last blowjob.

 
 22/ What's the difference between a
 bitch and a whore?
 
 A whore sleeps with everyone at the party
 and a bitch sleeps with everyone at the party
 except you.
 
 23/ What's the difference between your
 wife and your job?
 
 After 10 years the job still sucks.
 
 
 24/ What's the difference between love,
 true love, and showing off?

 Spitting, swallowing, and gargling.
 
 25/ Why is the space between a women's
 breasts and her hips called a waist?
 
 Because you could easily fit another pair
 of tits in there.
 
 26/ Do you know why they call it the
 Wonder Bra?
 
 When you take it off you wonder where her
 tits went.

 27/ How do you make 5 pounds of fat look
 good?
 
 Put a nipple on it.
 
 28/ Why did the woman cross the road?
 
 What's the bitch doing out of the kitchen
 in the first place
 
 
 29/ Why are there no female astronauts on
 the moon?
 
 'cos it doesn't need cleaning yet

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