If Noah's Ark was Canadian built? -- The Old Hangout

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Subject:

If Noah's Ark was Canadian built?

Author:
Rick

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Date Posted: 15:55:26 02/21/03 Fri

If Noah's Ark was Canadian built?

The Lord came to Noah in Canada in the year 2002. Earth was wicked
and over populated. The Lord instructed Noah to rebuild the Ark and
save two of every living thing along with a few good humans. "Here's the
blueprint," said the Lord. "Hurry - in six months I start the rain for 40 days and 40
nights."
Six months later the rain came down. The Lord looked down and saw
Noah weeping in his flooded yard - and no Ark. "Noah," He roared, "Where's my
Ark?"

"Forgive me, Lord," begged Noah. "Things have changed. I needed a building
permit. I've been arguing with the inspector about the need for a sprinkler
system. My neighbours claim that I have violated the neighbourhood zoning
laws by building the Ark in my yard and the height limitation being
exceeded. We had to go to the Development Appeal Board for a decision."

"Then Transport Canada and the Department of Highways and Hydro wanted a
bond posted for the future costs of moving power, trolley and other overhead
obstructions, to clear the passage for the Arks move to the sea. I argued
the sea would be coming to us, but they would hear nothing of this."

"Getting wood was another problem. There's a ban on cutting local trees in
order to save the spotted owl. I tried to convince the environmentalists
that I needed the wood to save the owls. No go! I gathered the animals. But
then I got sued by an animal rights group. They insisted that I was
confining wild animals against their will. As well, they argued the accommodation
was
too restrictive and it was cruel and inhumane to put so many animals in so
confined a space."

"Environment Canada decided that I could not build the Ark without filing an
environmental impact statement on your proposed flood."
I'm still trying to resolve a complaint with the Human Rights Commission on
how many minorities I'm supposed to hire for my building crew." The trades
union wants me to hire only union trades people with Ark building
experience."

"To make matters worse, Canada Customs and Revenue Agency seized all my
assets, claiming I'm trying to leave the country illegally as well as with
endangered species. So, forgive me Lord, but it would take at least ten
years to finish this Ark."
Suddenly the skies cleared and the sun began to shine. A rainbow
stretched across the sky. Noah looked up in wonder. "You mean
you're not going to destroy the World?" he asked.

No," said the Lord. "Your Liberal Government already has!"

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Replies:

Subject	Author	Date
Good one, Rick. Unfortunately in my town they've required building permits for some kid's treehouses - seriously. (NT)	Trevor/TJ	21:50:17 02/21/03 Fri


OMG - Between you and T. J. - I simply don't know!	Warren C. E. Austin	04:44:13 02/23/03 Sun
Hmmm. Doubt it. -- Trevor/TJ, 12:43:31 02/23/03 Sun Although, I wouldn't put it past -- Trevor/TJ, 12:46:19 02/23/03 Sun