Subject:  Chapter 76 |
Author:
Angie
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Date Posted: 21:19:31 08/04/03 Mon
Tyra sat on the bathroom sink waiting for her test to finish. She picked it up and began to jump up and down. One line! So she wasnt pregnant.
That night Tyra thanked God for her second chance. She knew she couldnt handle being a mother, she also knew she wasnt ready to have a boyfriend. Her head was all messed up and all she needed was to be alone.
She picked up the phone and called Tony
Tyra:Tony can you listen to me for a minute?
Tony:Im listening
Tyra:I am through with you who are you to send someone to break it off with me?Dont you know the only reason I was with you was to score. So I guess we both got what we wanted.
Tyra hung up in his face. Tony looked at the phone amazed that Tyra had the nerve to talk to him the way she did. He smiled and said to his self
Tony:Shes the one.
*********
Krystina and Tyra sat in Cashmeres room the day of Shawns funeral.
Cash:I can do this right Krys? Can I really do this?
Cash smiled trying not to cry.
Krys:You can try, its not going to be easy but I'll be right by your side, me and you we gotta be strong for Momma Janine, shes been asking about you, you know Momma,
Krys imitated Janine
Krys:"How Mah baby holding up"
Cash laughed a little
Krys:She trying to hold the family together but you know she not taking it well so we gotta be strong for her okay
Cash:Okay
Krys:Now come on let them tears out.
Cash broke down and gave Krys a hug, Tyra joined them
Krys:I love yall and I miss this
Cash:Me too
Tyra:Me three.
*********
Tyra Cashmere and Krys sat up front with Momma Janine,Granny, and Shawns two older sisters Micha and Maylee.Krys held Makayla in her lap.Makayla the youngest of them all was the one with the biggest tears. She kept screaming out "I miss my brother, I want my brother."
Des sat in the back with John&Cat and Jamal&Jackie who held Symphony
Cat:*whispering*Wheres Olamide at?
Des:*whispering*I dont know he told me he needed some time to be alone but that he would be here.
The preacher began to speak and everyone quieted down. He gave a quick sermon and then he asked if anyone would like to remember Shawn Shawns two sisters went up first and then Krystina.
Krys:Let me start off by being honest and saying Shawn was no angel. But he was real, he was real in everything he did. To Shawn I was the little girl on his block he kept an eye out for, to me he was my brother. He was always there for me when the girls down the street tried to jump me...I mean I just loved Shawn especially after he met my girl Cashmere, because thats when I got to know the real Shawn the Shawn that wasnt hard, the Shawn that just loved.
Olamide walked into the room.
Krys:No one knew Shawn like Olamide did...Olamide come up here
Olamide wiped away his tears that fell as soon as he walked into the room.He didnt care if he didnt looked like a punk or not.
Krys:Say something
Lams:Im not gon sit here and give you no watered down speech, Im just going to keep it real with yall cause I know thats what Shawn would want me to do. That was my boy yall, my brother. He took me under his wing when no one else would.
Lams voice began to crack
Lams:Thats the Shawn no one knew, the one who would do anything for the people he loved, the one that would die for his crew.
Lams took a long pause and stared up at the ceiling
Lams:I remember it was just a week ago we was planning our futures, he was telling me how he was going to get my girlfriend to like him, how we was going to have our weddings together, God he loved you Cashmere.Makayla was going to be the flower girl and Momma Janine was paying for the whole thing.
Everyone laughed.
Lams:You cant tell your future though. We not suspose to mourn Shawns death its a time to celebrate because this world is full of B.S and Im glad he dont have to see it no more.
Lams:Im just so glad he dont gotta suffer no more.
Olamide broke down in tears which made Momma who was holding it together fall apart.
They walked out of the funeral home to A Ballad for the Fallen Soldier by Jay-Z
This here's a ballad for all the fallen soldiers
I'ma bout 'ta show you how a hustlers life (this is life man)
And a soldier's life, parallel
And the one thing they got in common is pain (forget about me for a second)
Picture split screen
On one side we got a hustler getting ready for the block (human beings)
Other side you got the soldier getting ready for bootcamp (soldiers)
They're both at war (this is life)
Stay with us
Did you ever notice, before you think, life goes fast
So don't you worry, about what you see, it will pass
You lost him mama, the wars calling him
Feel its his duty to fall in line with all of them
He's a soldier
Rose through the ranks as the head of your house hold
Now its time to provide bank
Like he's supposed tah
Now just remember while he's going to November
Theres part of him growing up
His shirts soaks up your tears as he holds yah
Your heart beatin so fast speeding his pulse up
Yeah i know it sucks, Life aint a rose bud
A couple of speed bumps
You gotta take your lumps
Off to Bootcamp, the worlds facing terror
Bin Laden been happenin in Manhatten
Crack was anthrax back then, back when
Police was Al'Qaeda to black men
While I was out there hustling sinning with no religion
He was off the wall killing for a living
Days turn to nights, nights turn to years
Years turn to "how the fuck we make it in here?"
My barracks average couple fights a day
Get you locked in a hole wont see the light of day
And I feel like I'm just writing my life away
I never thought shit could end up quite this way
There's a war going on outside no man is safe from
I'm here for the good fight only the fakes run
I'm here for the purple heart, if I cant take one
For my team or my siblings whats my reason for living?
I love my niggas more then anything else
This war's about my family, me needin the wealth
You dont understand how useless as men we felt
Till you become a 5 star general
Shout out to my niggas that's locked in jail
P. O. W. 's thats still in the war for real
Your baby boy is getting grown
So your baby boy is moving on
I've gotta chase (gotta chase it)
If I'm gonna make it (gonna make it)
Your baby boy is getting grown
So your baby boy is moving on
I'm gonna make it
Even if I gotta take it (gotta take it)
Mama said pray your sons becoming a man
This wars taxin to 'em like Uncle Sam
Hear the noise make the right choice, understand
Every choice that he make he makes it for his fam
It's death before dishonour
And if hes gone you should honor his memory
Dont cry we all gonna die eventually
But if he's locked in the penetentiary send him some energy
They all winners to me
(What's up kid?)
Des sat in the car with Olamide at the cemetery. She held his hand while wiping away her tears with the other.
Lams:You know I feel a little better knowing Shawn aint suffering no more you know.
Des:Yea. I wish I would of just took the time out to get to know Shawn. All I could see when I looked at him was another gang member and I feel so fake right now.Im so sorry Olamide
Lams:We all judge people so Im not mad at you.
Olamide kissed Deshones forehead
Lams:Its OK
Des:Well I gotta go. Im going to go see how Cashmeres doing. Tyras with her but shes falling apart. Cashmeres Mom couldnt get a day off. You going to be OK?
Lams:Yes Im alright.
Des kissed Lams on the cheek
Des:I love you so much
Lams:I love you too
Des got out of Lams car and into her own
*********
Krys helped Maylee in the kitchen while Olamide sat on the couch talking to John, Kareem and Mike two of top players in C.V.G (can you believe it?)
Kareem:Damn I dont even know whats going on anymore
Lams:Tell me about it
Kareem:Shawn wasnt supose to go out like this. Out of all of C.V.G he was the most loyal.
Lams:Shawn was just like that man.
Kareem:I didnt know what was going on but you have my word the niggas that killed Shawn have already got dealt with. There are going to be ALOT of changes in hood.
Mike:And you can walk the streets freely now dog, we know you real now.
They gave eachother the boy handshake while John just sat there in a daze.His brother used to be in C.V.G but he never heard conversations like that.
Krys walked into the living room and took a seat on the couch beside John
Makayla walked into the room holding a plate with cornbread and greens.
Lams:Makayla come here
Makayla took a seat in Lams lap he started to eat off her plate.
Krys:Hey little momma where you been?
Makayla:Outside playing hopscotch
John stood up
John:Well let me get out of here I got to be at my Dads job at 5 tomorrow morning
Lams and John shook hands.
After John left everyone sat in the livingroom in silence
Lams:I keep thinking Shawn about to come out that room man. This is really messing with my head
Krys:I know.
Kareem:Well we about to go blaze one up(smoke weed) at Mikes house yall wanna roll?
Lams looked at Krys and shrugged his shoulders.He hadnt smoked since he left C.V.G and got with Des. He thought to himself "What the hell Im in mourning"
******************
Krys and Lams sat in Mikes livingroom with Mike and Kareem. They were so high they couldnt even see straight. Krys looked at Lams with tight squinted eyes and laughed out loud
Lams:Whats so funny?
Krys:Did you know you have a blockhead?
*******************
Cashmere sat on her bed staring into space. It was like no one was there but her. Des and Tyra sat beside her.
Des:You wanna talk about him Cash
Cash shook her head. She wanted to keep every memory of Shawn she had to herself.
Tyra put her arms around Cash.
Tyra:We're here if you do.
Cash:Thank yall for being here for me.
****************
Krys giggled as Lams kissed her neck
Krys:Oh Lams that feels so good
Lams:Damn Krys you looking so good to me right now
****************
The next day Krystina went to Cashmeres house to check on her plus she wasnt ready to go home yet. She walked into Cashmeres room to see her laying in bed crying.
Krystina:Oh Cashmere this is so hard.
Krystina say beside Cashmere
Cashmere:It's not fair. Why Shawn!Why Shawn!
Krystina:I dont know Cash I dont know.
Cashmere:Everytime the phone rings I jump thinking its Shawn, when I hear someone knocking on the door.......And then I have to think to myself hes not here. What am I suppose to do without Shawn?
Krys:Be strong.
*********************
2 months have passed and things seemed normal.Lams sat in the living room waiting for Des to come over. Letonia sat on the couch opposite of him changing channels
Lams:Dang Letonia when are you going to get out
Letonia:Hold up dont make me go off on you
Lams:Man why dont you just go home!
Letonia plopped her feet up on the coffee table
Letonia:I am home
Olamide groaned and walked outside to sit on the porch. Des came ten minutes later and took a seat next to him.
Des:Whats wrong baby
Lams:Can you get Letonia out the house, find her a boyfriend or something cause shes getting on my dang nerves!
Des laughed
Des:You know Letonia only goes after other peoples men and now that Jiz and Cat are all lovey dovey again,thank God, she has nothing to do
Lams:Seriously baby you need to help your man out and get Letonia out the house. Forreal.
They both laughed.
**********
Cashmere sat at Frostys with Tyra and Krys. Krys stared at Des who sat with Olamide Jamal John Jackie and Cat. She shook her head remembering the first day she talked to Olamide here,wishing she could take back the mistakes she made.
Cashmere was trying to get on with her life, she missed Shawn more and more with each day but she knew she had to live life.
Krys: I'm in trouble yall
Cash:Whats wrong?
Krys:Im pregnant
Cash:Your what?
Krys:You heard me right the first time
Tyra:Wow Krys what are you and Talib going to do?
Krys shook her head and quickly wiped away a tear that fell from her eye
Krys:I wish I could tell Talib
Cash:Lib is a good guy he'll be there for his child and he loves you so much he wouldnt leave you
Krys:Its not Talibs baby, Talibs been too busy with school and his new job to do anything........Its Olamides
Everyone at the table gasped
Tyra:your lying
Krys:ha, if you only knew
Cash:I thought you were through with him
Krys:I am, I was, I love Talib yall I really do, its just that, the night of Shawns funeral me and Olamide we got high with Mike and Kareem, they left us alone in the room and one thing lead to another and it just happened.
Tyra:So Lib knows nothing about it
Krys:No. This was suspose to be a one time thing. We figured what they didnt know wouldnt hurt them. I mean I never thought that I could cheat on Talib with Olamide of all people. God if I could just take that night back
That night Krystina went over Olamides house.They went upstairs to his room to talk
Krys:Olamide we messed up
Lams:Krys what are you talking about?
Krys took a long breath and then let it out
Krys:Im pregnant
Lams just stared at Krys trying to think of the right thing to say. When he couldnt come up with the words he said
Lams:Krys you gotta go, you just gotta get out of here
Krys:What
Lams:I''m not hearing you right now.
***************
Krys walked home in tears. When she got home she sat at the kitchen table staring up at the ceiling deep in thought. A couple of hours later the doorbell rang. She opened the door to let Olamide in.
Olamide:Im sorry about earlier I had to get my thoughts together
Krys:I know
Olamide:Where Mom at?
Krys:In her room.Lets talk in the kitchen.
They sat at the kitchen table
Lams:So its mine and not Talibs?
Krys:Yeap. Sad to say your the only person I've been with in the past 4 months
Lams:Well what are we going to do?
Krys:Get rid of it.
Lams:You sure?
Krys:Yea, I mean you got a good thing going with Des and I got a good thing with Talib.
Lams:I love you, you know that
Krys:And I love you too. But us being together its a crazy idea, you love Des your going to marry her. I dont want to stop your happiness
Lams:So were just going to get rid of it
Krys:I made an appointment for Friday morning
***************
Krys and Lams sat in the womens clinic Friday morning. She had been vomiting since she woke up and did not feel good at all. She laid her head on Olamides chest and he wrapped his arm around her shoulder
She looked at the lady who was staring at her smiling and tried to smile back.The lady looked at least 7 months pregnant
Keva(The ladys name):You guys make such a cute couple. How many months are you?
Krys:two
Keva:Dont be so nervous about it having a baby is a beautiful thing.This is my second one.
Krys got up from her seat
Krys:I gotta throw up
Krys ran outside and Lams followed behind her
Krys:I cant do this Olamide take me home
Lams:You sure
Krys:Im sure
They sat in the car
Krys:I cant do this Olamide. I cant kill my baby. What if I can never have kids again
Lams:You dont have to do anything you dont want to do Krys. Your the one that wanted to get an abortion in the first place!!!
Krys started to cry and looked out of the window
Krys:Im scared Olamide, Im scared.I tried so hard to be a different person, I gave my all to Talib I never cheated on him not even once and then one night with you and I end up pregnant.What am I suspose to do?
Lams:Whatever we gotta do Im here for you
Krys:I know
Lams:Now we got to figure out how to tell Des and Lib
Krys:Olamide....Lets not tell them anything, I dont know what I'd say to them
Olamide nodded his head
Lams:Yea me neither
And with that they drove away from the clinic
*Ade, I know Des and Lams are your babies but I had to shake things up a bit I only got like 2-3 more chapters left. I leave for college in 10 days!!!!
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