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Date Posted: 18:59:47 05/27/05 Fri
Author: RW
Subject: MY Jesus can fly, thank you very much
In reply to: Reverend E. Dwayne Looper 's message, "RW is confused and unsaved. Please let us pray for this person." on 17:51:09 05/27/05 Fri

Jesus does not fly as it would be undignified; to do so would only invite comparisons to ungodly and morally-compromised "superheroes."

What's undignified about flying? Is Superman undignified? No way. Superwoman flying through the air in an invisible jet is pretty damn cool, wouldn't you say? And Underdog? Come on. It goes without saying that the Holy Lamb of God would be the ultimate in cool, and you can't be the ultimate in cool if you don't fly. Sure, these superheroes weren't sinless, but you know, if Jesus can't duplicate what mere sinful superheroes can do, what kind of messiah is that?

Witness the spectacle and mockery which attended "The Flying Nun" and you can see why God long ago took away the ability of Jesus to fly or otherwise propel himself through the air.

Okay, God took a blow when TV producers sent Sally Field flying through the air. The entire church of God lost hundreds of years of respect and progress with that one television show. Same with Highway to Heaven, damn that Michael Landon. But God is God! If the world makes a crude attempt at duplicating His abilities like flying through the air, does God put a halt on the flying biz because of that? NO! God doesn't change, despite Sally Field.

Humans cannot fly. Jesus is in a human body and so he cannot fly, breathe underwater, or walk through walls. Jesus has all of the limits of a human body except when God allows him to do miracles as when he walked on water or saved Chuck Colson.

But Jesus has ascended into Heaven and is no longer bound by a human body! That's why He can fly, and even turn Himself into a pretzel if He wanted to. Jesus could be hiding in the transmission of my SUV, for all I know. Jesus is like Santa Claus -- He can do anything! Is He not the Son of God?

Frankly, if Jesus wanted to fly he would have to take a plane or be shot out of a circus cannon like the rest of us.
Jesus' human body is simply not designed for flight. He has no spoilers, flaps, ailerons, or thrust reversers for landing. He has no wing deicers as he has no wings. He is not like an angel.

Dude, the S.O.G. is tight with the Big Man. You know, on the right hand of God and all that shit. He dumped the human body a long time ago. He's a ghost now. Ghosts can do any kinda shit they want. Don't need no damn ailerons or de-icers.

Jesus can use Holy Spirit Voice Mail and this happens right away as in right now or this instant. The point is that Jesus does not fly nor can he fly as has been decreed by Divine fiat.

That's heresy, man. Jesus can do any damn thing he wants. He's the Alpha and Omega. You can't be both an Alpha AND an Omega and not be able to fly. I'm not going to worship a messiah that can't fly around. Blasphemer.

Conversely, we who are saved will fly up the Rapture to meet Jesus in the clouds. We will fly like Superman to meet Jesus. RW, are you saved? If not, why not? Do not seek to evade my penetrating questions with your whimsical notions of a flying Christ.

Hey, I believe in a messiah that can fly around like a hovercraft. You don't. Now, which one of us is the unholy doubter? Not me.

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