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Date Posted: 04:28:46 08/17/05 Wed
Author: psi
Subject: my test results, because for some reason i want to tell them and other assorted facets of my life?:
In reply to: Dio 's message, "omg....NS..you had to ask." on 05:38:35 08/16/05 Tue

not to brag, really to show that they mean nothing.

i think my iq is about 155 or 160. thats what my mom told me when i wanted to know, because i went through a three day obsession with joining mensa, and she said she didnt want me to know, and gave me a vague answer in that range...

my act was 32, which i was late for and, at the time, wasn't planning on going to college and was on huge, regular doses of opiates, and listening to the flaming lips and modest mouse regularily. the thing i remember about it was wearing a spongebob squarepants tshirt to it, as well as these really tight punk pants with converse and thinking that this cute girl thought i looked cute. that might have been my calc AP test though (which i got a 3 on...i thought i could have done better, but then again "i didn't care", as was my opinion at the time, I'm not quite sure... ...

im currently studying philosophy and maybe music. i think im different from most people, i dont really know why. i relate to most people really well and have bonding moments and things that are, at least, really important to me... i get really sentimental and romantic about things to do with people... i'm really sympathetic and empathetic to people, over the top so i think... probably too much for my own good. i really try to relate to everyone and i think i do a really good job at it. i used to cry a lot.

i play guitar, people tell me im really really good at it. some of my musicially inclined friends and i are starting a band simply out of boredom and out of lack of respect for some many of the respected minneapolis bands. not that we'd be good. its more of a "we all love music so much and its such a big part of our lives" thing so why the heck arent we making it? thing.

i think im smart. i make horrible decisions and am bad at life. i do a lot of self damaging things, things that i know i shouldn't do but do anyway. i'm horrible with money, absolutely horrible. ive lost so much money... so much...to the stupidest things. things that could have gone to so much better things.

my first dream was to be a writer and i wrote a fucking ton of shit, all of which is lost forever. i think it was good. it might have been shit. i dont know. i used to sit in class and write and write and write....and then go home and write and write and write. and then later destroy it when i changed my mind about whether or not i liked it.

i like philosophy a lot. a lot. i think too much...

im a really self damaging person, which is something im working on. i still dont care about school. sometimes people around me tell me they're worried about me, which surprises me because for some odd reason i dont believe them.

clank was right when he siad that in late 2000 and in 2001 i became gloomier and depressed. i really did. that time period marked a huge shift in who i was to who i still am, largely. literally, that exact time period. im surprised you remember that, clank. very true. that was a really important time period in my life, in terms of my personality as it exists...even if i dont think of that time often anymore (which I don't). i have other things to think about now and another life.

im being really introspective, one of "those times" i guess. sucks to read im sure. all be better tomorrow :) I gotta get up for work in 2 hours and work all day and im all tipsy.... heheh

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