| Subject: Re: Heather & Shelly & anyone |
Author:
Heather
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Date Posted: 08:46:47 08/09/06 Wed
In reply to:
Free Spirit & New Spirit
's message, "Heather & Shelly & anyone" on 15:46:36 08/08/06 Tue
I don't know about any of you reading this, but if I know things aren't healthy for my boy, he isn't going over there. I showed him who was in control and that person is me no matter how much things go haywire sometimes, I say what goes and that will always be that. He is sick, he's an addict, and my son will not get ruined by that. He gives him baths, cleans him up, feeds him, plays with him, does all sorts of things with him, the thing that he does is talk to him about things he shouldn't , say things to him that no parent should, come and go only when it is convenient for him, leaves my son waiting for him.....I will not have that for my son. I am doing the right thing for my son. I have prayed on it, thought on it, cryed on it, changed my mind several times, but in the end, after looking at everythin, hearing everyone,.....he is not a good influence for my son by any means. ANY means at all. If he cared, he would be making sure I had enough money for his food, clothes, etc....he doesn't send anything. He doesn't even try to give him anything. He says he will have things at his house when he comes there. So he would rather his son suffer all the days at my place because we sometimes struggle, but we have what we need, than to help his son out? He sleeps on the floor or the couch at the place he is staying and thinks any judge in their right mind is going to give him joint custody? He is crazy. He wouldn't have anywhere to sleep, no bed of his own there. What kind of life is that for a kid? Not one that I will accept. This housing is only temporary for Spencer. Once he has to take complete control of his life, he is not going to be able to stand and then what? My son will have to see him fall again and then this time he's older, it hurts more, he sees more, he knows more. I have seen too many children of addicts become addicts themselves. Plus he is sick in other ways........I will not do that to my little boy. It is easy? NO. Does it hurt? hell yes it hurts,it kills, because no matter what has happened there is still a soft spot for him and that may never go away. I hope it does but what I actually hope for is that he gets serious and gets true help. Help for his addictions and help for the other issues that he is dealing with. I know what they are, we have talked about them and it is stuff that has scarred him for life. Stuff that no one can take back, re-do, or erase. He has to get help, there is no other way.
His story is long and sad, nothing that any child should have to live with....I took it on because that was my co-dependent nature........I am no longer that way. If I notice issues with people that are way beyong what I think is my norm, I run. Its something they have to get help for or deal with first before they are to get involved in a caring wholesome relationship.
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