| Subject: KIM |
Author:
Heather
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Date Posted: 09:43:11 05/03/06 Wed
In reply to:
Kim
's message, "For Heather" on 20:28:19 05/02/06 Tue
Thank you Kim. Thank you so much. I love being able to help people through this difficult phase that so many of us go through.
The kids, Kim, really, should they be involved with him? You know the things that I found out was happening when I was not at home to babysit the babysitter (dad).?? Your kids do not need to be around him or the new girlfriend. At the court case you should remind the judge of anything you feel is dangerous to the kids mentally, physically, and physchologically. People on meth are dangerous.
I was talking with my family the other day about when I used, cause I don't remember all that much until they reminded me. They told me that I was basically killing myself slowly, had no cares in the world, stopped coming home, making excuses. What I remember is running from the cops or believing I was running from them, hiding, taking drugs to school and using them throughout the day. Head in a cloud, someone could sneak up on me and I never seen it coming. My head on meth was just not right and I only used for 4 months, so I can only imagine someone who has used for YEARS and YEARS. I slept like 3 hours a night during the week. I lived in a garage. I was having sex with other addicts, getting STD's..oops did I say that out loud? WEll it's true. You know how an addict thinks and now that you are clean, do you really think he is capable of taking care of kids at the moment? he may look like a dad, but think of the thoughts going on in his head, remember the new girl is not their mom and if she gets sick of the kids and gets edgy, most likely he will as well. He should have to test clean on the hair follicle test before he can actually pick them up for any amount of time, otherwise supervised visits through the state or no visits at all.
Yes you were using as well and luckily now you are not. Offer to take parenting classes to the judge. Offer anything you need to do in order to keep the children in your custody and for him to not be able to pick them up. This is just advice.
I can no longer even deal with my soon to be ex husband, not even on the phone. He was served the Divorce papers and has not even contacted me. I told him I can not deal with him at all. I know he is scared shitless because this is his life waving good bye in his face and he chooses to do nothing about it. Crazy really. I don't want him, don't get me wrong, but he does nothing that he is supposed to do to get right so that he can see his son. But I feel great cause the kids and me are doing great without him. My kids actually told me that they would like to see me find a boyfriend. How sweet of them. I asked if they would be nice to a new man and they said yes as long as he was nice to me and to them. They are so smart and I will never let them get hurt by addiction as long as I have the power to prevent it.
Keep reading and keep writing. It helps. I will be here for you should you need to talk.
Thanks for taking what I have to say in to consideration.
Heather
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