| Subject: ooh, just ONE more post mommy?? |
Author:
Sirius
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Date Posted: 18:35:03 03/04/03 Tue
as soon as James awoke screaming, so did Sirius, Remus, Peter, and (unbeknownst to them) Lily.
he was immediately tackled by the other Marauders, being the unlucky one and having a bed in the middle.
"Gah! Ni! I! CAN'T! BREATHE!" James yelled at the top of his lungs.
"I think that the proper curse word would be 'icky icky icky icky vaccumb zzzoup boing murmer murmer...'."
the others just stared at him like he was a werewolf.
"What?!" he cried, and they began to laugh.
__some short time later, during breakfast___
"Hello, and I'm Oprah, here today with James POtter, Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, Peter Pettigrew, and LIly Evans. We're going to be talking about anger management. But don't worry! we've got some surprises for these 'marauders'." she grinned, huge and fake. "now, James, please tell us why you were shamelessly attacking your fellow student, Severous Snape, today during morning meal."
"Breakfast." Sirius muttered darkly.
"Well, I guess it all began with this disturbing nightmare Lily had, that I was never informed of."
"Okay, then, Miss Evans, would you please describe your dream?"
"No." Lily said, pouting. "I hate you and I hate this stupid show. I've got homework. Let me go to the library."
"Security! Code candy-apple-red!" Oprah suddenly scremed. Several press reporters rushed in, snapping pictures of Lily and leaving her blinded, seeing little floaty lights, and cheerful in a brain-dead sorta way.
"Righty-o." Oprah said with a hearty laugh, aimed at the glowering boys. "What happened next, Sirius?"
"Well, James got the idea in his head that he had to save his parents. So we followed him and Lily tagged along and Remus wolfed out and then we held him back and this kid named Harry popped outta nowhere."
"Harry?" Oprah repeated, puzzled.
"Yes. He spun this interesting tale about being our son and how we were all doomed." James snapped.
"And then he disapeared and we woke up screaming." Peter contributed meekly.
"So you were hallucinating?" Oprah asked, with a muttered whisper to her agent, "are they on drugs?"
"True!, I mean... no! We were all dreaming at the same time."
"In the day?" Oprah said. "What kind of morons are you all?"
"It was night then!" Remus cried. "so we went down to breakfast. and Snape swaggered up looking like a drunk, and he started informing us of how he's been controlling our minds, and that's why we're suddenly failing all our classes, cuz he a brainless git." (no offense tara)
"I see." Oprah said, and whispered, "Security, I want a padded wagon primed and ready."
"So James beat him up, and you popped up and CAN'T I JUST STUDY??!!!" Lily cried suddenly, only to be sedated again by the flashes of the camera.
"Yes, well, we have a few surprises for you..." Oprah said with a wicked grin. "I am not Oprah, I am a large fat man named Bob who works at an oil-chage company and counts the hairs on my beer belly for amusement."
"Uhhh..."
"Oh, was I thinking out loud again? Never mind, here's our first guest, Severous Snape!"
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