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Welcome to our one and only SPOOF ON THE MARAUDERS! Read and add to this very interesting fan fic we like to call... our one and only SPOOF ON THEN MARAUDERS!

Subject: oh, I'm home too


Author:
Stubby Boardman
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 12:23:32 07/01/03 Tue

(I just LOVED the stuff in the 5th book about Sirius, lol! although I am pretty mad at J.K.R., for 'reasons that Fufu can't know until she's done with OotP'. Though I think you have enough minds to see why. Um...so yeah. I have no brain. Can anyone do anything tonight? (today being Tuesday) or at least until Friday? (being my b-day, so I'm stuck with my relations).

back to the story, folks. Will someone tell me what's going on--CHELS??!)

Sirius and Remus crept along the halls of Hogwarts, each holding a large tranq gun. Moments before they had tranqed the insane James (he just wouldn't shut up about those American Muffins...) and the gullible Peter, after making sure he had removed all the herrings from his pants.

"Where would Snape be?" Sirius asked.

"Probably in the library, studying for our OWLS."

(did I just skip a year?? what year are they in, does anyone remember?)

"Okay, then. Let's go and tranq everyone in the library."

"That's alot of people, Padfoot."

"When has it stopped us before?" Sirius asked innocently. "Besides, I'm bored."

"Then go whine to James. The map says that Professor Dumbledore is also in the library."

"Ooh, what great fun!" Sirius exclaimed.

"No! He's old and frail and you're going to kill him! I won't let you!"

"There's the library! You can't stop me now, Remus!"

"Oh yes I can!" Remus cried, and tackled Sirius. They rolled past the door to the library, snarling and biting at one another. Sirius made sure that he wasn't actually bitten, though. With insane screaming about the Muffins and a Shrub, the two boys were making quite a racket. Everyone that had been in the library was now piled into the hall to watch them fight.

Dumbledore shook his head sadly and shot them both with his own mini-tranq gun. This solved the mystey that had been plauging Hogwarts for years--why would kids randomlly go to sleep in totally unrelated classrooms? Because Dumbledore was all invisible and cackling insanely as he shot them all...

*********

Chels, Fufu, Chrissy, and Tara all began to beat Maddi with ink pens and mechanical pencils.

"You can't do that to the Marauders! We have a plot to follow!" Fufu cried.

"Plot?" Maddi asked. "What Plot?"

"No taking fanfiction terms in our story! ERASE IT!" Chels cried.

"I'll never tell yoou hooow..." Maddi yelled back.

"Just SHUT UP! I'm going to write them back awake now..." Chrissy said.

"Okay," Maddi agreed, and hurridely scribbled something down.

*********

James opened his eyes to discover that he was lying in the middle of several large sand dunes. The wind whipped sand into his face and hair, making it difficult for him to breathe.

"Where are we?" he cried, seeing Remus, Sirius, and Peter look around in confusion.

"Don't ask me, I'm actually Stubby Boardman." Sirius replied calmly.

"Who?!" Remus demanded.

"No one," Peter said quickly, shooting a glare at Sirius.

*********

"Gah! No! We're not on Silver Lake!" Fufu cried.

"How did you know that's where I put them? They're in the middle of the Saharah." Maddi replied.

"You wouldn't strand your own alter-ego there!"

"You're right," Maddi agreed.

*********

The Marauders all screamed in fright as Sirius disapeared with a small 'pop'.

(aren't you glad we're all home again?)
Subject: slide!


Author:
Peter the slippery
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 19:36:27 06/23/03 Mon

James was about to protest, but couldnt, as they'd already exited. They sat about glummly for a few moments and Peter tried to get up a few times, always falling back down.
"So what exactly are they doing?" James inquired, getting to his feet.
"I dont know...afterall im the guy who thought i was saposed to stick herrings in my knickers." Peter stretched out a hand so that James could pull him up.
"Good point..." James pulled Peter to his slippery feet.
Subject: so does anybody remember what letter I was on?


Author:
chrissy... er... tokyo... er... James
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 19:16:57 06/23/03 Mon

Peter began to fidget with his sleeve. "Ca't I stay and watch Jamesy-er-James?"
"What?" James asked incredulously. (dos anyone know wut that means?) "Why do I need to be watched?"
"Well, you were knocked out," Lupin explained. "You couldn't come, and u can't come."
"Yes I can! I can! I'm fine! Really!" James insisted.
Sirius shook his head. "No. Stay." Ahe with that he and Lupin zoomed up and out of the room.
Subject: bewilderement


Author:
Peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 12:43:33 06/23/03 Mon

"Can we get back to the Marauders now?!" Maddi asked, quite annoyed.
(Oh, by the way. What's everyone's views on the new book??? Is it just me, or had Harry always been so clueless? It seems like other people have to tell him everything)
Finally the story resumed!
*******************************
James awoke with a groggy feeling, he rubbed his arm where he'd been stabbed with a neatle (that isnt spelled right...i have too many issues).
"What's wrong, Jamesy?" Sirius asked, tugging on a cord attached to the ceiling.
"Nothing...what are you doing???" Jame inquired as he examined his friends. They were all dressed in black and with all the equipment they had it gave him the impression of some sort of covert op...James frowned and scratched his head, "Ow!" he yelped as he had a bump on his head that seemed quite tender. "So they must have knocked me out too..." he said underhis breath, meaning the Muffins, not the Marauders.
"What was that?" Remus asked.
"What? Oh, nothing." James muttered.
"...okay" Remus dismissed. 'Perhaps we should commit him' Lupin thought, just then Peter came slidding out of the bathroom and zoomed down a small staircase and flew headlong into a wall. 'On second thought maybe we should commit him too...' Lupin shook his head and went to help Peter off the ground.
"Jeeze. What were you doing, soaping your shoes?" Lupin said sarcastically.
"Well...yes." Peter answered sheepishly
"Really?"
"Yeah, Sirius said that we need to--hey! That wasn't nice!" Peter, realising the trick, tried to stand up to attack Sirius, but fell back on his buttocks with an interesting squishy noise.
"Peter...you didn't piddle in your pants again...did you?" James questioned, examining Peter's soup-covers shoes.
"No, it's another thing Sirius said i should do...put," Peter got on his knees and proceeded to pull out several herrings from his knickers, "To put fish in my pants."
"Ewwwwww." James and Lupin unisoned.
"I said it was optional." Sirius smiled, giving another few tugs at the cord.
"All fish aside, what are you doing, Sirius?" James asked.
"Well we're going hunting you see, and we're planning to catch a rare and greasy creature known as a Snape." Sirius explained, "We're setting up this rope and..." (i dont know, you figure it out)
Subject: mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm... mama


Author:
James
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 11:51:18 06/22/03 Sun

just then Chrissy and maddi appeared, each holding very large twists dipped in chocolate. Maddi had a piece of the chocolate on her nose and both looked a bit sloppy.

"Hey Sean," Chrissy chirped as tho this were an everyday occurance. "Is Chels too annoying cuz we can write our self- HEY!" Lauren picked up a pen and wrote them all back to the Mr. Kopas' computer room, where Mr. K sat playing Butches on his laptop. "Hey! No food!" he shouted at Maddi And Chrissy.
Subject: meow


Author:
Peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 14:32:49 06/20/03 Fri

Chels rolled her eyes, but didnt write Lauren's idol out. Instead she swung down into the passenger's seat.
Sean did a doubletack, "Where the hell did you come from?"
"Me? The roof."
"...oh." His eyes were on the road again as they careened through city.
"So, that guy's after you?" Chels inquired, looking back at Nicolas Cage in the yellow sports car.
"Him? Yeah."Sean looked into the rearview mirror quickly.
"Well you'll dial up your estranged daughter and tell her to meet you in some park. Then you'll have a moment of peace together before the Feds show up and drag you back to base. Then you'll agree to lead them through Alcatraz to get the bad guys. A bunch of stuff will happen, but in the end you get away." Chels explained the movie.
He frowned, "What are you talking about?" suddenly he swirved into an alley.
"That's what's going to happen, so hurry us and find your daughter, loose these guys, ditch the car, i'll drive!" she offered. It wasn't a strong plan, but for some reason he agreed and they quickly changed seats.
"Ok, hop out!" he rolled out of the car, but the feds didnt spot him.
Subject: Evil Cow of doom....


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 12:32:19 06/19/03 Thu

(chrissy, u know about my dislike of the cow, come on now! respect my feelings, please)

Lauren gripped the side of the Hummer as she was thrown to the side. Sliding along, she yelled, "Help me!!! I don't wanna die!!!"

Suddenly, a man with a golf club appeared.

Chelsea twitched. "Fufu, give me tha notebook!"

"What notebook?" Lauren asked in a voice dripping with false innocence.

"The one you're using to write in Adam Sandler!"

"Oh, that one..." With a sigh, Lauren obeyed and the confused Happy Gilmore went away with an interesting poof.
Subject: hhhghj,,jgxjfzgjj


Author:
James
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 12:15:26 06/19/03 Thu

Chrissy and maddi watched the interesting sceen in front of them. Eventually they got bored. "Wanna go buy a soda?" Chrissy pipped. "Ok!" Maddi agreed and they hopped of to cold cow to decide if they really wanted a soda, or if they's rather an ice cream.
Subject: yowza


Author:
Pter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 10:29:25 06/19/03 Thu

She didn't bother explaining her hairbrain skeme, but rather just jotted it down in the notebook. All of a sudden the street became a chase scene from The Rock, which Sean Connery, as Mason, speeding down the busy street in a Hummer with police at close persuite.
"What the heck?!" Lauren yelled as the hummer sped by. Chels reached out an elastic arm and grabbed onto the hummer, she, and lauren, went flying onto the Hummer as it swirved about.
"AHHHHH!" Lauren screamed while they attempted to hold onto the roof of the car. Inside Connery glanced up to see them peering down at him through the moonroof.
"What the--" He started,but quickly turned onto a sidestreet before he could finish.
"Ahhhhhhhhh!"Chels screamed, and they slid to the other side of the are.
"What are you complaining about, you wrote this!" Lauren yelled over the noise of police sirins and the rushing wind.
"Yeah, but i didnt think it'd actually work."
"What do you mean you did know it would work?! Where have you been?"
"In mind or body?"
"GRrrr, nevermind. Lets just try and survive this."
Subject: wow chels, u sure know a lot about pointless cop stuff....


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 11:16:57 06/18/03 Wed

"Do we have to?" Lauren whined. "I don't wanna follow him...besides, he doesn't even like us! Is there even a point to chasing him?"

Tara shrugged. "No, but it can't hurt this story any more than it alrady is, can it?"

Lauren didn't answer, only sat in the corner and brooded.

Chelsea appeared at her side and cheerfully announced, "Guess what?? I have a cool idea!"

"What?" Fufu asked warily.

(...any ideas?)
Subject: police


Author:
Peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 18:41:19 06/17/03 Tue

"No really we're trained! We accidently got lost in a police training camp one summer and as a result know alot about guns...getting shot...and other cop stuff." Maddi explained.
"We know how to play dead." Chels added
"And cuff people"
"And...eat doughnuts with the expertice of a profesional cop!"
"And we can use human shields!"
"And how do sniff out drugs."
"Like the dogs do!"
"And how to hold a flashlight in that cewl way."
"And how to spray pepper spray properly, not into your eyes but into your assalant's eyes!"
"And all that cewl cop lingo."
"Alpha four niner."
"Anything else." Lauren asked boredly
"Uh...no that seems to be it." Chels answered.
"Wait! We did learn how to drive a get-away vehicle as well as how to chase one." Maddi added.
"Jolly good...now can we just follow Harrison out of here?!" Chrissy asked.
"Oh...i guess so..." Chels muttered.
Subject: I TOLD U I HAVE NO PROBLEM WITH PROFANE LANGUAGE!!!!!!


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 14:28:32 06/17/03 Tue

Lauren looked hesitantly around to make sure Harrison wasn't listening. "See," she hissed when she was sure he was out of range. "I told you not to drag poor Marcus, er, Harrison into this! I said some one else, but do you ever listen to me??"

"No," Tara replied cheerfully. "But no one ever listens to me either, so it works out just fine."

Lauren stuck out her tongue.

Mr. Kopas looked around warily. "I don't wanna get shot.."

"We'll protect you," Maddi and Chels chorused assuredly.

"Uh huh." He didn't look convinced.
Subject: futang


Author:
Peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 12:23:17 06/17/03 Tue

Harrison Ford suddenly appears and steals Chrissy's pink bike.
"Hey that's mine!" Chrissy protested, but he only yanked harder
"Hey! You can't do that!" Mr. Kopas yelled in defense, but the turtle--erm---harrison just let out a demented yell/scream.
"Jeeze!" Lauren exclaimed as he hopped onto the bicycle.
"I always thought he looked like a turtle.." Chels grumbled.
Harrison stoped, turned around menicingly and growled a raspy, "What?!"
"Uh...nothing sir. I was, i was just talking about...about a...poppies! I need to plant more poppies in my garden this year!" Chels replied in a high-pitched voice.
"You said i looked like a turtle." Harrison said, dismounting the bike and hobbling over to the group of girls, and a teacher, in the middle of the busy Hollywood street.
Lauren, luckily, jumped infront of him to try and save the others, "Please disregard my--my erm---my patient's comment."
"You're patient?"
"Yeah, uh, i mean yes. She's mentally disturbed and we're...we're *twitch* um...transfering her to a new padded cell." Lauren proceeded to creat an allaberate tail involving twin mice, a peacock who wished he had a degree in law, the nice people at the county jail, and...a hampster named Sam who could do specail things with a CD Rom.
"I see..." Harrison muttered, confused and concerned for the Doctor's mental wel-being.
"AH! GET DOWN!" Maddi yelled, flying out of her wheelchair and knocking Harrison to the ground as gunshots rang through the hills...(there are hills now...)
"Sh--"
"No profane language! We have a certain Fufu with virgin ears!" Chels warned, as they all crouched behind a parked hurse. Several bullets flew through the windows, sending glass shards falling onto their little heads.
"So that's what all those tornado drills were for." Chrissy said, glad she'd learned how to do the proper squat and covering of the base of her head thing.
"It's a lie, it's all a lie." Harrison babbled and the girls just looked at him oddly. They then noticed he was on his fun cellphone.
"I've always wanted one of these." Maddi said, grabbing the phone and fiddling with it.
"OoO! Does it have fun ring tones?" Lauren asked, taking it from Maddi.
"Or text messaging?" Chrissy inquired and the phone was tossed to her.
"How bout games?" Chels questioned and the phone was thrown about the small huddle behind the hurse.
"How much to you pay a month for coverage on this thing?" Mr. Kopas asked, flipping it in the air.
"Hey! Give that back! I'm in the middle of an important business call!" Harrison yelled, but more shots range out and the girls dropped the phone onto the cement.
"God! That was a brand new phone! Now it's broken! How did you brake it--oh nevermind. Just get the hell away from me!" Harrison hollard. And the girls wimpered and backed away.
"I saved your life." Maddi reminded him.
"Whatever." the angry star said, peeking over the hood of the hurse.
"Aw. That wasn't nice." Lauren sighed.
Subject: chels, how many times do we have to go over this? mr. k is not a cow!!


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 11:50:23 06/17/03 Tue

"Um...what??" Tara shook her head in disbelief.

Chelsea clapped her hands together and cried, "Mr. Kopas knows his Indiana Jones!!"

Lauren shook her head. "Is Mr. Kopas the only person we'll ever drag into this wacked out story??" she demanded.

Everyone else stared. "Well...who else is there?"

"Gah!" Lauren yelled. "There are lots of other interesting people, like, like..."

"Harrison Ford," Tara supplied.

"Yeah," Lauren agreed, then shook her head. "No! People who exist, people we know!"

"Like who?" Maddi demanded.
Subject: cows!


Author:
peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 15:05:58 06/16/03 Mon

(not that this person would make a good cow...but he's on the brain)

"Mr. Kopas, what are you doing dressed up as a cow?!" Tara asked amazed.
"Oh yeah, and who's going to save you, JUNIOR?!" He yelled in reply.
Subject: :-) what were you trying to say ther, chels? morally wrong to eat him even tho hes a cow?


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 13:21:31 06/16/03 Mon

Lauren twitched. "i've heard of people with the nickname of cow, but I refuse to believe a person could actually be a cow!"

"Who says one of these so called 'nicknames' isn's just an alias?" Maddi asked in a superior tone.

Lauren sputtered. "It's just not possible!"

"Or is it?" The cow had removed it's head, revealing...

A HEADLESS COW!!...wait, hang on...

No, it's revealing...

(k, clearly, i ran out of ideas, so someone else decide who would make a good cow...)
Subject: mew mew mew


Author:
Peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 16:53:37 06/15/03 Sun

"Now you're pulling my nickers." Fuf replied in a positively British tone.
(Oh, here's some news: Roger Moore ((the scarest of all 007s)) was knighted. Also, has anyone heard from Mr. Kopas lately? Aren't we going over his place on Wed?)
"Am not." Maddi said appaled.
"Well...even if he is a human, it's immoraly wrong to eat him!" Chels muttered.
Subject: Um, sacred cow??


Author:
fuf
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 15:56:16 06/15/03 Sun

(what was link doing that..o, forget it..)

Lauren blinked at the sacred cow, which actually looked more like a terrifed cow to her. Then again, it actually looked more like..dinner.

She gave a devil-my-care grin and attacked the cow with a crossbow.

Before a bolt could atually hit the frightened animal, Chels grabbed her arm. "No!" she warned. "You may not hurt the cow."

"Why?" Fufu demanded.

"Because..it's a human being," Maddi replied myseriously.

"In diguise," Chrissy added.
Subject: gosh o golly gee whiz


Author:
James
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 06:41:23 06/15/03 Sun

When link was done, they were all transported to the fire temple.

"Hey, what's this?" asked chrissy.

"I haven't finished this level yet." Link shrugged, and ran into a big hole.

"Wow, its hotter than i thought in here," maddi panted.

"Quick!" Link called. "Down here!"

The editors fell down into the hole to find... the sacred cow!

"Wait thats not here..." Maddi complained.

"SHHH." scolded the others.

***************************************************************************

The marauders sat on the steps in the great hall.

"What were we doing?" James asked aloud.

"Going to pull a prank on snape." Sirius answered.

"Oh. OK."
Subject: im so sad now cuz i wont ever see people like julia or angela again!


Author:
fufu the sad
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 12:40:49 06/13/03 Fri

Peter was groaning, and Chelsea was quoting and Maddi was looking aimlessly for Link and Lauren was scribbling in a notebook..wait, that's never good!
Subject: being a 9th grader gives me a feel of accomplishment


Author:
James all of the sudden wants to go back to school... i wanna be a highschooler!
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 11:32:42 06/13/03 Fri

"No really, my rib cage hurts," Peter whined.
Subject: Pumpkin


Author:
Peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 10:31:19 06/13/03 Fri

The Marauders crept towards the Slitherin commonroom under the cover of the invisibility cloak.
"My ribcage hurtsh." Peter wimpered.
"No, that's Elsa." Tara's voice came from above.
"Shhh!" Sirius hissed, elbowing Peter in the stomach.
"Ooph." he weezed.
Subject: mooshoo pork


Author:
Peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 15:20:41 06/12/03 Thu

(Aw...)
Somewhere Chels wimpered, she missed Mr. Kopas, even though they'd see him on wed. But she settled for Alley, who did a great Mr. K impression!
Subject: LAST POST!


Author:
Maddi
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 11:39:35 06/12/03 Thu

"I don't like chinese food." Alex commented shyly.

"What's chinese?" Link asked.

"It's--" Maddi began.

"Just be quiet, Maddi. Let's get back to the marauders."

"Okay," the muffins agreed.

And so, the five muffins and their four male counterparts huddled around the notebook once more, planning something magnificant.

*****************************

James woke grogilly in the common room, wondering why his arm hurt so much.

"let's go smurf Snape," Sirius said wearily. "I feel the need to wreck some serious havoc."

"okay," James agreed.

(SCHOOL'S OUT!!!!!!!!!!)
Subject: finding forester... wait... what


Author:
tokyo
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 11:34:45 06/12/03 Thu

Lauren rocked back and forth in as corner muttering, "I wanna see Alex... grrr..."

Chrissy sat beside her and tried to con=mfort her. "Don't worry," she said, "I i can write us out, you can talk to Alex all you want." she showed her her hand. "And i can see Mike. See? Here's his address to his restaurant. We can have a double-" Maddison cleared her throat, "-triple date and eat dinner there."

(THIS IS MY LAST POST IN MIDDLE SCHOOL!!! WAHHHHH!!!!)
Subject: futile!


Author:
Peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 11:23:22 06/12/03 Thu

The others turned away grumbling. And Chels walked to the small closet, she opened the door a slight bit.
"Can i come out yet?" Dan asked from within the closet.
"Yeah, the coast's clear." Chels whispered back.
Subject: you're all scary...


Author:
Sirius
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 05:23:13 06/12/03 Thu

Yente howled in pain as she was reminded of her distant homeland, scuttling across the floor. She ran straight into a wall, falling to the ground and writhing in agony.

"Make it stop!" she screamed, bursting into tears. "MAKE IT STOP!"

"Only if you hand over the notebeook!" Chels bargained, free of the spell, as Dan had been destroyed.

Yente sighed sadly. "Okay," she said at last. Moments later, she had been written out.

The muffins squealed in surprise as the guys disapeared. Maddi, Fufu, and Chrissy all turned to Chels. Their eyes glowed red and they jumped towards her, growling demonically.

"Hey! I was doing us a favor! Just think--how far would our plot have progressed if we were toting along a bunch of guys and some lovesick girls?!?" Chels cried.

"She's right,"

"She makes sense,"

"Ooh, logic," the three muffins choroused.

Chels relaxed visibly, no longer endangered by her peers. She took up her pen and began to write. Suddenly, the enraged Kopas was happy and go-lucky.
Subject: awww last day :(


Author:
Peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 04:13:20 06/12/03 Thu

(lol! Fair play.)

And he was assending from the sky when--suddenly Mr. Winston CAME FLYING AT THEM ON HIS MAGIC CARPET AND KNOCKED DAN FROM THE SKY!!!
"Oh my." Yente could be heard from somewhere.
Dan tumbled on the sky, crashing onto Link as he was still instructing Maddi with the bow and arrow. And Arrow flew up, bouncing off the walls, until it came down and nearly went through Chrissy's foot, but stopped in her shoe.
"Gah!" she yelled. But this was short lived as Michael Chan appeared beside her, pulling the arrow from her shoe. Chrissy beamed.
Suddenly they all broke into "match maker, match maker"
"Match maker, match maker make me a match." Maddi sang.
"Find me a find."
"Catch me a catch."
"Night after night in the dark i'm alone, so find me a match of my own."
"I thought i'd escaped Anetevka!"Yente yelled.
"Because of our TRADITIONS every man knows who he is and what God expects him to do." Link added.
"Who day and night must scramble for a living, feed a wife and children, say his daily prayers. And who has the right as master of the house to have the final word at home." The other men/boys joined in.
"The PAPA! The PAPA! TRADITION! THE PAPA!!!!!"
Subject: *doubles over in hysterical laughter while glaring at chels*


Author:
fufu the serenaded
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 15:54:21 06/11/03 Wed

(umm....chelsea???? what are u doing??????)

Lauren looked helplessly at Maddi, who was staring at her loved one, the nonreal character of Link. "Uh...Maddi? A little help here?"

Madison, broken from her revere for all of two minutes, asked dreamily, "Why? Isn't this waht you want?"

Lauren started to nod, then realized that Alex was attempting to sing (nothing against his vocal skills, of course...*ahem*). She twitched.

"Madison!!"

Chelsea, down the hall, looked up. "Hey! It's...it's!!"

Yes, it was 'its'. In other words, Dan had appeared.

(*evil grin* payback, chels, payback. do better than that!)
Subject: lalala


Author:
Chels
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 13:39:28 06/11/03 Wed

(oops it's saposed to say "Maddi", not MAny)
Subject: rupert


Author:
Peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 13:35:53 06/11/03 Wed

Just as Chrissy and Chels thought they where close enough to conk Maddi over the head with a math book Alex appeared, proclaiming his love to Lauren.
"Oh fair maiden--that's you-- please, please, please take me as your boyfriend!" Alex pleaded.
"WHAT?!" The others gasped and Lauren turned an interesting shade of majenta, and aquard color to blush.
"I have love you for so long-" he started.
"Lauren, did you write this?" Chrissy inquired, raising an inquisitive eyebrow.
"N-no, honestly i didn't."
"Then who di-" Chel began, but was cut off when she saw Yente--the matchmaker!-- scuttering away down the hall, notebook in hand.
"Oh no! She's up to her evil tricks again!" Maddi cried, climbing off lauren and straightening her head to the right possition.
"I thought we'd locked her away for the next five centuries." Chels thought aloud.
"Yes, but that was a false security. She's obviously broken the spell."
"What spell?" Fuf inquired.
"The CHEESESTICK spell. And now she's come to match us up with people!" Chrissy yelled and it echoed through the halls.
Poof! Suddenly Mr. Winston arrived on...on a magic carpet acompanied by a belly dancer named...Pertrice?
"Winston! You're cheating on me?!" Chels exclaimed, falling to the ground crying. She clutched the pantleg of a tall gentlemen who had also appeared."Uh...who's pantleg am i blowing my nose it?"
"It is i."
"That doesn't help us." Maddi replied.
"I am your bride---erm i mean----Link!" and he was, he was quite handsome, being a cartoon and all. He looked slightly older, and taller, than in the game, but none the less he was link. MAny nearly fainted, but managed to remain conscious.
"Li-Link." She stammered and cartoon hearts began to float around her head.
"Oh no, not another one." Chrissy muttered gravely.
It was quite a scene, as many things involving the muffins are, Alex had changed into Shakespearian garb and was strumming a tune on his lyre while sarinading Lauren. Link was teaching Maddi who to use a bow and arrow---ow! That was my back!*glares at maddi, who shoots again*-- and the other two where fruitlessly hunting down Yente as she scurried somewhere in the building.
Subject: lol, dont eat me....


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 06:19:27 06/11/03 Wed

Fufu sat in the corner, bleeding from the mouth, but grinning. "Hey, I would have to be half-vampire for this to work out..and we'd have to be, like, 25!" She reached for a notebook. "Now to write some people in"


"No!" Maddi yelled but it was too late....

Mr. K, among other people, appeared.

He looked down, then up, then down. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! NOT AGAIN!!!!"
Subject: no vampies no!


Author:
Sirius
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 06:16:07 06/11/03 Wed

"Gargh!" Maddi yelled, jumping on Fufu.

"Ah! Get her off, get her off!"


And so on this day, our hero has killed thrity people." Maddi quoted. "She would later admit to having a good time doing it," she began to fumble for a weapon of some kind as the muffins approached. "Thirty-two, actually, if you count the zombies!"

"MAddi, it's all okay..." chels said slowly.

"Yeah, just back away from the Fufu..." Chrissy added.

"No, she is mine!" Maddi howled, head twisting demonically.
Subject: oo, de ja vue!


Author:
fufu the master author
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 06:11:24 06/11/03 Wed

(ha. now we need....mr. k....jason...alex...JMS middle school in dead, burnt out condition...)

Fufu grinned broadly, causing Maddi to yell, "WHAT DID YOU DO???"

"umm..." Fufu shrunk back a bit. "Incorporated my unfinished futuristic vamp story into the forum's sacred database?"
Subject: Fuf, you moron...no fighting!


Author:
Siriub
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 06:07:13 06/11/03 Wed

"AAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!"
Maddi screamed. "NOOO VAMPIRE FIGHTING!!!!!!!"

"What's going on?"

"Nothing!" Maddi told Remus, slamming him with the math book. she turned back to watch the Muffins fight, tearing each other apart. "Is this a spell?"
Subject: *pause* Maddi...


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 06:00:41 06/11/03 Wed

(y r u ganging up on me?? I didn't do anything! ...this week...)

"Ah!" Chrissy yelled. "Did you just wack my alter ego with a math book??"

"Yes..." Chels grabbed for her needle. Chrissy body-slammed her friend and the needle went skittering across the floor.

(and we're back to the vampire-story of mine where we're all beating upon one another....)
Subject: I CAN POST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Author:
Sirius
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 05:55:36 06/11/03 Wed

The slumbering Marauders were dragged out of the great hall by five teenage girls unsuspecting, they were.
"so what do we do with them? and why is this spaced so weird?" chels asked.

"I dunno, it looked cool in the message box..." maddi muttered.

"right. well, let's take care of this one," fuf said, indicating James.

"Why?!" Chrissy asked in shock, rushing to protect her alter-alias. "He must live!"

"we're only going to erase his memories of us. we've already gotten the others, remember? but scientific studies prove that when a fictional charecter comes in contact with the person who writes them, they suffer a severe mental breakdown as they contemplate existance. we're only doing your James a favor, Chrissy. trust us..." Maddi explained.

"whoa, I didn't catch a word of that..." fufu muttered. "I might as well run off with my uncle Jim, who is actually named James..."

"Why?!?!" chrissy howled.

"Just be quiet! I'm going to fix him!" Chels cried, pulling a medical needle from her pocket. Ripping the sanitary seal off with her teeth, she stabbed James' arm with it. Blood began to spray at the editors, seemingly impossible from such a tiny flesh wound.

"What was that?!" Maddi exclaimed.

"It was, um..." Chels looked at the label. "Moltrin IB infused with a small dose of vitamin C."

"No!!!!!!!" Chrissy cried, falling to her knees. "James! why...why..."

"Link can save him!" Maddi exclaimed.

the muffins turned and began to growl. "this is a harry potter spoof. there will be no mention of Legend of Zelda, Star Wars, or any other obsessions." Chels informed her.

"Yeah, like BUFFY and CHARMED, Fufu!" Maddi cried.

they all rounded on Fufu, who began to back away.

"hey, James is waking up!" she cried.

they turned. in frustration, Chels whacked him over the head with a random heavy object (aka, a book). he slumped unconsious to the ground.
Subject: moo


Author:
Peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 05:18:54 06/11/03 Wed

Peter, most of all.
Subject: uh...


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 15:57:15 06/10/03 Tue

"Ag!" Lupin yelled, shoving his hands up next to his head in an attempt to keep out the screams of James. "Don't eat the muffins!" he shouted to his friends. "They're drugged!"

But, alas, it was too late. The muffins had been consumed and the Marauders were slumping...
Subject: aldfkj


Author:
Sir Peter (the rabid)
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 14:54:09 06/10/03 Tue

"That's odd, how come i had the odd sense i was talking to James, he's still in the basement..." Lupin muttered.
"Don't let him get into your head." Peter warned, rocking back and forth.
"Muffins!" Some randome person yelled and muffins appeared on everyone's plate.
"Mmmm! Muffins!" Peter gobbled them up quickly, snaching them away from the others and hording them.
"Hey, my muf-" Sirius started, but was nearly bitten by a rabid Peter
Subject: uhh.......im not that innocent.....


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 18:13:13 06/09/03 Mon

James twitched a bit. "What was that???"

"What was what?" Lupin asked, innocently shoving Snape off the edge of the bench.

"Didn't you feel that?" James asked excitedly. "That sudden change in motion?? Time stopped for one brief moment and we lived to tell about it." He sat back, proudly wiggling all over like a puppy.

Sirius moved his shoulders. "Uh...Jamsey boy, um, perhaps...how, if time stopped, were you able to sense it when we, men of like intellect (well, minus Peter), didn't feel a thing?"

"Hey!" Peter sounded only mildly put out, thereby further proving Sirius' point.

"Perhaps he belongs in therapy...." Lupin suggested.
Subject: pppppppp


Author:
Peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 11:20:02 06/09/03 Mon

Snape scurried to the Griffindor table and plopped down beside the Marauders, minus James. For a moment they sat chewing, trying to understand why this greasy fellow was sitting at their house's table.
"Uh...why are you sitting at our table?" Sirius asked, breaking the silence.
"I think the real question is, where is James Potter." Snape sneered.
"What is your motive, oh Greasy One." Sirius rephrased his question.
"I can see that you are not one to beat around the bush so i'll get to the point. So as not to confuse your simple intellect.-- Where did you put one James Potter?"
Suddenly everything froze as if something had malfunctioned in the film room.
"Woah, woah, woah." Chrissy growled, waving her arms as she came on screen, walking infront of the frozen scene, "Why are these characters--whome i've shaped and created this whole year-- being melted down to people who speak like they're in the middle of a James Bond action film?"
"I thought it would sound better..." Chels confessed from off camera.
"Sound better? It sounds like shi-" Maddi started, hopping onto screen. She was fallowed by the rest of the Muffins.
"Ah! The profanity!" Lauren screamed, falling to the ground and clutching her ears.
"I just thought it would liven up our dialogue a bit. You know, some variety." Maddi shrugged
"Diversity!" Chels added from science class, "Different plan and animal life in an environment."
You know that Fuf has a zero-tolerance mechanism for profane language." Chrissy
"You must be purified!" Lauren yelled.
"Lets just let them go, we'll forget about the James Bond-like wording." Chels said and the reel started again.
Subject: cool cats contemplate corny concoctions in a cucumber-melon catacomb


Author:
James
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 05:21:34 06/09/03 Mon

McGonagall pointed her wand at his head and muttered a spell. Suddenly he stopped looking dead and was much more chipper.

"I feel much better. Thank you." he said to Mcgonagall.

Snape appraoched the table cautiously. "Your not ok headmaster. You see, soon you will be lying in your bed contemplating weather or not this cancer will let you live when all of the sudden you have a heart attack and drop over dead."

Dumbledore wimpered. "R-really?"

Mcgonagall chased Snape out of the room. "10 points from slytherine for harrassing the headmaster!" she called, walking back to her seat.
Subject: hog


Author:
Peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 05:15:56 06/09/03 Mon

"On bad days, yes." she replied, turning her attention to her goblet.
Subject: i dont wanna post...


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 05:05:50 06/09/03 Mon

"Umm...." murmered Dumbledore from the head table where he was looking kinda dead. "Why am I here? Who am I?" He turned to McGonagall. "Are you a cat?"
Subject: The hour


Author:
Peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 20:42:14 06/06/03 Fri

(oopys, error. "The boys**, minuse James" there, that's fixed. Someone post!!!)
Subject: merlin


Author:
Peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 04:16:58 06/06/03 Fri

"Grah is a very interesting sounds effect." Chels commented from above. Somehow it echoed down into their compartment, James went plane nuts.
"Caw! Caw! They're after us! Hide! Run! Flee my pilgrim friends! I will slay this beast!" He yelled phsycotically.
The others had huddled in the opposite corned, hoping that three feet would be a safe distance away from the raving lunatic who had once been Prongs.
Hogwarts was beautiful as always. It symbolized every aspect of the craving for knowledge. The boy, minus James, couldn't help but be taken aback by how it rose above the trees mejestically.
This moment was short lived, for James soon began to yell, "They're comming! Run! Run! Hurry!!!"
He completely freaked a herd of 1st year girls, who stampeded towards the lake, screaming in their shrill little girl voices.
"Bloody Hell, James!" Lupin cursed, planting his hands firmly over his ears.
"You should run too! Go far away where they cannot find them. No even better, go to America, hunt them down! Destroy them! All of them! And their little teacher too!" James was foaming at the mouth.
--*&@#($@))))(#$^!@#^#*@*&!~()*$#_
The great hall was decked out in it's finest decorations and the ceiling showed the mystic dark blue of the sky, spotted with hundreds of twinkling stars. The food was scruptious and it refilled itself onto each student's plate.
Meanwhile James was in his grimy padded cell deep within the bowels of the castle. He sat in his tight-fitting straight jacket grinning and every so often babbling incoherently. His eyes were wide and showed that he hadn't slept in quite some time, and his messed up hair gave him the proper affect of insanity.
Subject: what letter was I on?


Author:
James
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 05:13:26 06/04/03 Wed

Lupin threw his hands up to calm James down. "OK, first of all, who in bloody blazes is Jazzerous, Oprah, and Shrub?"

"Well," James said childishly, "Jazzerous was our headmaster-"

"DUMBLEDORE is our headmaster!"

"Oprah was a talk show host-"

"Hogwarts doesn't HAVE a talk show!"

"And Shrub was the President of the US-"

Lupin had had it then. "WHY WOULD WE HAVE THE PRESIDENT HERE? UNLESS I MISSED THE MEMO, THERE IS NO REASON FOR ANY OF THIS TO HAPPEN! YOUR LOOSING IT POTTER, REALLY LOOSING IT! NOW GET IT THROUGH THAT THICK SKULL OF YOURS THAT THIS IS NOT A DREAM AND WE ARE NOT CONTROLLED BY EDITORS!!!! GRAH!" he sighed heavily. "OK, anyone else want to rant?"

sirius and Peter shook their heads. "I think you out did us in that department," Sirius laughed.
Subject: umm...stoutly was my word, chrissy!


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 05:39:00 06/03/03 Tue

As they pulled their robes over their heads, the boys continued to look at James, wondering if he really had gone kinda crazy.

Trying to sound nonchalent, Sirius asked, "So...Prongs, why are you forcing us into this? We've never changed earlier than four minutes before we pull up to the castle."

James didn't answer directly. Instead, he said, "Wait, we can form a band cause that didn't happen before!"

Lupin cocked his head. "What?"

"And..and we can't pick on Valdwig or we'll be subjected to his singing, which will lead to meeting Dumbledore, than Oprah and the Shrub, then Jazzerous will be eaten by McGonagall..." James realized blindly that he was ranting and the others were staring at him.
Subject: baby blue bonnet sounds like a fun phrase


Author:
James
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 05:17:14 06/03/03 Tue

"No," James said stoutly.

"Why not?" Peter pouted.

"Because there's the school."

The boys all crowded to the window, staring joyously at the big castle.

All of the sudden James pulled away and stared at them all. "Before we all get any closer to the school we need to get into our uniforms NOW!"

"Why?" Asked Sirius.

"Because if we don't do it orderly, then we could end up like... oh never mind just do it!"
Subject: what the heck, chels???


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 04:59:48 06/03/03 Tue

(this is getting scary)

Sirius cleared his throat. "Um, so, we're going to create this band."

"No," James said stoutly.

"Yes," Lupin argued. "As long as I don't have to sing."
Subject: bpoo


Author:
Peter (again)
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 04:16:50 06/03/03 Tue

"You see that Jeeves, with slight of hand, concieves a skeem so carefully planned. Even we don't understand if he takes it t e r r i b l y s l o w l y-" Peter belted out.
"Uh...we finished, mate." Sirius informed.
Subject: saint


Author:
Peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 04:15:02 06/03/03 Tue

"Our identities switched." Peter started.
"Who is who,"
"Which is which."
"We're in need of some solid advice."
"What we need is a free range consultant."
"Where on earth do you find one of thoooooose?"
*pause*
"By hook."
"By crook."
"By book."
"By shook."
"By caminbear."
"By 40 theaves!"
"By George."
"By Joe."
"By Jeeves!"
*pause*
"Don't you leaders of men deligate now and then to keep your minds totally blank?"
"To accomidate loftyer matters.:
"Things that mostly go over my 'eadddddddddd" Peter sang beautifly off key. He held the note out way too long and the others found themselves cringing.
"By George."
"By Joe."
"By Jeeves."
"By Jeeves!"
"Byyyyyy Jeeves." They all ended. Applause was head and they each took a bow.
Subject: all right, from the beginning!!! letter a!


Author:
James
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 19:03:13 06/02/03 Mon

James jumped up and began to sing in a remarkably good singing voice, "All the lonely people. Where do they all come from? All the lonely people. Where do they all belong? IIIIIIIIII look at alll the lonely people!"

"Yeah! Now thats what I'm talking 'bout!" cheered Peter, dancing as James sang various Beetles songs.

"We all live in a yellow submarine." sang Sirius.

"I forgot about that one," muttered Lupin.

"I heard this great new stuff by these people called Zoey Girls and NewzBoyz," James commented. He began to sing, "And I will shout it from my mountain, that I'm not the same that I used to be..." He switched artists. "You lift me up with tender care..."

"Wait, thats christian Pop and Rock music!" protested Peter. "Sing Beetles! Please?"

"Ummm... oh! I got one!" Sirius "Hey Jude, don't make me cry..."

Peter broke out into tears.

"Oh brother," sighed Lupin.

"STOP! ENOUGH! lEAVE US ALONE YOU STUPID EDITORS! STOP TYPING SONG LYRICS CHRISSY! I'M SICK OF THIS! GET SERIOUS!"

"Hey..." warned Sirius.

"Not you," James snapped.

"Geeze. Your too grouchy to be my alterego," echoed Chrissy's voice. "Shhh," the other editors scolded.

"Ok, it's offical. James' lost it." Sirius said sadly. The other marauders shook their heads sadly.
Subject: pennnnnnnnnns are sharp!


Author:
Peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 14:31:16 06/02/03 Mon

At the rate James was going he would be commited by the time they reached Hogwarts. Sirius realized this and only shook his head sadly.
Peter also saw James glance to the heavens and wondered if James was creating a new religion...
"Ooo danny boy. The pipes, the pipes are callin." Sirius broke out, with arm jestures at an added bonus.
All went quite, "Are we Irish now?" Lupin inquired, raising a brow.
Subject: hey, y has no one posted


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 10:31:54 06/02/03 Mon

(god, this computer is slow...and this keyboard is loud!)

"New song!" Sirius yelled, thrusting a packet of lyrics at Peter, who began to sing: Woah-o, Laredo, don't let her go. Take her by the heart and let the wheels turn slow. Woah-o, Laredo, you're my only hope. Take her back to the day we met--"

"Laredo's a city in Texas!" James muttered. "And why is he now singing Chris Cagle??"

"How bout this one?" Sirius suggested.

Peter broke into a rendition of 'I Think About You' by Collin Raye, and James groaned.

"No! No more country songs!! Stop it!! And, besides, you don't know any blue-eyed 8 year olds who's your daughter!...Do you?" James demanded.

Peter blushed. "NO!"

"Then what's with the country?"

"I'm a Ford truck man," Peter responded, though he looked nothing like Toby Keith.

"I am the son, I am the heir. Of a shyness that is criminally vulgar, I am the son and heir...of nothing in particular." Lupin cut in. James looked up at the ceiling, mumbling about 'that Lauren kid' having taken over.
Subject: oopsie


Author:
fuf
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 08:32:59 06/01/03 Sun

"No, we're British because that's how we were written...," Lupin muttered.
Subject: daffffffff


Author:
Peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 08:17:26 06/01/03 Sun

(I was going to post, but it got screwed up)
An interesting electric guitar solo could be heard in the background.
"Ah! Not that scarey for of the American national anthem!" Sirius cried and the music abrumptly stopped.
The others eyes Sirius cautiously he shook his head and said, "American musicians can be very scary..."
"That's why we're british!"
Subject: so....i CANT FIND MY LIBRARY CARD!!!!!!!!!! NOOOOOOOO!!!!


Author:
FUFU
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 18:11:27 05/29/03 Thu

(IM SO MAD, I LOST MY LIBRARY CARD...WHY AM I SO STUPID? HOW DO I GET MYSELF INTO THIS STUFF??)

Poor James felt horribly about his fight with Lily but what was he to do? Calling her over would show weakness..."He relives every word they sopke in anger...paces the floor and punches out the wall...if he's lose her, he's lost his best friend..."

Annoyed, James looked over at Peter, who was holding a microphone and attempting to croon into it. "who taught this boy Travis Tritt songs??" he demanded of Sirius, who was banging a soft beat on a set of drums and Lupin, who was strumming a guitar with practiced ease.

They shrugged. "We should start a band!!"
Subject: 80's a fun number to press


Author:
Peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 15:10:01 05/29/03 Thu

"It was an 80-year-old man and she wasn't flirting, she was trying to get him to sign up for some newspaper..." Lupin informed the others. Apparently Lupin had been there and knew, through his infinate wisdome that Lily wouldn't flirt with an 80-year-old man...or so he hoped.
James pouted and looked out the window.
"And 80 year old??? James, you've got compitition." Sirius giggled.
"Har Har Har, real funny." James muttered angrily, the others just laughed and Mr. Poofers started using James' back as a scratching post.
Subject: can openers are fun to throw at people


Author:
James
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 14:40:38 05/29/03 Thu

James opened the door. "Excercism on who?"

Peter was taken back by this sudden intrusion... "Ummm, well, uh, er..."

"On Mr. Poofers," Sirius quickly answered. "Lupin thinks that cat is possessed." Peter glared at him and Lupin changed the subject. "Lily just walked by James. Go say hi."

James wrinkled his face in disgust. "Can't. Wouldn't talk to her if she were the last girl on earth," he said sourly.

"Ummm, you get in a fight?" asked Peter timidly.

"Yeah. Over break. Something like I never respected her social life."

"What happened?" asked Lupin.

"I saw her at the leaky cauldren FLIRTING with ANOTHER GUY! GRAH!" he banged his head angrily on the wall.

"Who?" pressed Sirius, leaning in.
Subject: meow


Author:
Peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 04:16:57 05/29/03 Thu

When James got up to go to the small train bathroom Sirius closed the door behind him and he and the others huddled together to discuss James' odd behavior.
"He's going mad." an always optomistic Sirius said the minute the door hit the frame.
"Now let's not jump to conclusions." Lupin started
"He's a looney."Peter agreed
"James thinks he's hearing voices and editors. Now look me in the eyes and tell me that you don't think that that's quite off the deep end." Sirius said to Lupin.
Lupin shifted uncomfortably in his seat and gazed nerviously at the window.
"I'm not saying 'betray James', im just asking you a simple questiong. Do you think he's acting strange?" Sirius rephrased the question.
"Uh...well you have to remember we're talking about James..." Lupin muttered and Peter nodded in agreement.

****meanwhile*****

James hadn't had to use the bathroom. Instead he was on the caboose trying to sort things out. He could have sworn that he heard the editors. But no one else did. Could it be that they really were controled by teenage american girls? That the dream was really real, in some sense? He felt like he was going crazy. And he could see that he was starting to scare his friends with his odd behavior. Why was this happening??? Why to him? Why now?

***********back in the compartment*********

"Exorsism is always an option." Peter commented.
Subject: about how big is a stick of dynamite?


Author:
james
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 18:03:27 05/28/03 Wed

"Of corse we are!" cried out Maddi.

"Shh!" the other editors hissed.

James jumped nervously and looked around. "Leave me alone!"

"Uhhh..." Sirius stared at james for a moment before becomming occupied with his chocolate frog.
Subject: Mr. Winston the III


Author:
Peter (the cat whisperer)
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 16:49:06 05/28/03 Wed

"If it's her third it makes you wonder who the other two where..." James thought aloud.
"What?" Sirius asked, giving James an odd look.
"You didn't hear the voices?"
"...no..." Sirius answered cautiously, "Are you sure you're okay, James?"
"Oh...i thought for a moment i heard one of the--nevermind..."
"One of that what?"
"Nevermind."
"Oh. Ok."
Sirius shrugged it off and continued to tell Lupin about the pranks he pulled over the summer. James was caught up in his thoughts, why did he hear the editors? They weren't real...we they???
Subject: a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t u v w x y z


Author:
tokyo... er... James... er... now who am I again?
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 16:46:08 05/28/03 Wed

There were more sounds of Maddi holding chels down before she pounced on a sleeping Mr. Winsten. (sp?)

James waved his hand out of their compartment to stop the trolly. "We'll take the lot," he said, pulling out a hand full of his wizarding money.

"How do you always get a so much money?" Sirius asked later, munching on a Berty Bott's Every Flavored Bean.

"If I told you that I'd have to kill you..." James replied darkly, shoving his extra money into his pocket. (inside joke, ask tara)
Subject: im here


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 15:06:36 05/28/03 Wed

(back from wherever i was....)

"NOOOOO!!!!" Snape's voice followed them down the tracks and Peter gulped.

"What if he hexes poor Mr. Pooferz?? I'll be ruined without my cat," he mewled mournfully.

A voice from above quipped, "Much like Chelsea without Mr. Winstan?" and there was much scuffleing above the clouds as Chelsea tried fruitlessly to find her 3rd husband.
Subject: River Dance


Author:
Peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 08:37:16 05/26/03 Mon

Snape couldn't help himself. In a moment of rage he broke into River Dance and suddenly a stage appeared and his fellow dancers joined into his line.
"Ah! Help! I wanna stop!" Snape screamed, but he couldn't be heard over all the thunking of shoes.
The train began to move and Snape was forced to hop off the stage and persue his mode of transportation while jumping up periodically and clicking his heals together (like in oliver). From their compartment the Marauders cackled at the dancing Snape as he skipped down the tracks after the train. But, alas, he stumbled and fell(gracefully) to the ground.
"Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!" he cried out, pounding his fists into the pebbles that were in between the tracks. His RiverDance followers crowded around him to pick him up.
Subject: I could sooo picture that!!!


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 17:44:58 05/25/03 Sun

(oh, really....I've never heard that tale...lol, so u guys are back?)

Lupin was still laughing hysterically five minutes later as Sirius mimicked Snape's dance movements. James chuckled and pointed to the television in the compartment's corner.

"Look at this!" he said cheerfully, turning the tube on to the American (and possibly British too) channel of MTV. Snape was stepdancing all of the screen.

The real Snape saw this through the window and screamed, then ran for his life. The Marauders cackled hsyterically.

"Are we ever going to tell him that was only a glamor?" Peter asked uncertainly.

"What do you think?" Sirius demanded, still laughing.
Subject: muuuuuuuk


Author:
Peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 13:56:52 05/25/03 Sun

(Yes....after James' death and Peter's betrayal for a brief period of time he escaped up into the highlands of Scotland and became an illusive monk, like Nennius!)

As Snape performed some interesting Irish Step Dancing before a small crowd that had gathered, the train let out it's mournful cries to inform all the students that soon the train would depart. With a final stamp Snape had finished his dance and proceeded to shimmy (like Tevya) onto the train while the crowd clapped. The crowd had ever thrown money, as was indicated by the sickle stuck in his forhead.
Subject: note


Author:
fuf
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 17:58:32 05/22/03 Thu

(in a monking way? sirius is a monk?)
Subject: bah bah black sheep! have you any wool?


Author:
James
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Date Posted: 15:07:41 05/22/03 Thu

"Gee, Snape, I haven't seen you since... now where did i see you again?" Sirius asked thoughfully, rubbing his chin in a monking way.

Snape grinned his annoyingly evil and fake toothy grin as James sprawled himself onto the floor to get the frog. Quickly, he crushed it with his foot just as James was about to grab it. pulling out his wand, James cursed Snape's feet so that they would do tricky dance steps that even Roberto Guliano, some dancer he saw TV, couldn't do. Ammusingly enough, many of the steps were quite painful, like the splits and other odd body contortions.
Subject: hah


Author:
fuf
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 12:55:44 05/22/03 Thu

As he was mulling this over, James leisurey unwrapped a chocolate frog, but as he was about to stuff it into his mouth, it hopped away. He cursed, "Bloody hell," and started to go after it, but his path was blocked by none other than...Snape!!
Subject: >:) 11


Author:
Peter
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Date Posted: 06:55:59 05/22/03 Thu

(i know what a candle is!!! yey! :P)

All the while James couldn't help but think back to the vivid dream he had had that night. It had seemed to stretch over an eternity. He was still surprised he had gotten to sleep.
He also remembere back to his dream and was glad that he wasn't forced to smash his cart into the wrong pillar...but, oddly enough, he had bruises from where his "dream cart" had smashed into his pelvis...
Subject: hmmm...


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 17:41:24 05/21/03 Wed

(geez chrissy, how dumb do u think we r? we all know what a candlestick is!)

Lupin and Sirius hopped on beside him, but Peter hung back.

"What's the matter?" Mr. Potter inquired.

"Mr. Poofers gets motion-sickness," Peter muttered, eyes downcast.

Sirius snickered. "Sure that isn't just you, Pete?"

Looking at his sneakers, he muttered, "No..." but wouldn't meet Cara's eyes as she herded him onto the train, whining that "he was in her way".
Subject: a word of caution to this tail... should hurcules fight then you will FAIL! MWAHAHA!!!


Author:
James
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Date Posted: 16:06:31 05/20/03 Tue

Using a portkey in the shape of a old candlestick (the holder for the candles), they group finally arrived at the train station and onto platform 9 3/4.

James never tired of staring up at the grand locomotive, watching the smoke curl out of the tall smokestack, admiring the bright red paint that trimmed the black body. He couldn't hold himself back and, almost forgetting to kiss his mum and dad goodbye, hopped joyously onto the train.
Subject: oh, now i feel loved...


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 15:43:11 05/20/03 Tue

(aw....)

"He's right, we really should get going," Lupin piped up, holding the shaking Mr. Poofers in his arms. "I don't know what he was going on about with the auto thing, but I don't really want to be late for the train. So let's go."
Subject: Shmit


Author:
Peter
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Date Posted: 14:41:38 05/20/03 Tue

It was then that James' forgotten older adopted brother, Shmit, came down the stairs. He just looked at the lot of them in their caotic state and wondered why he'd been adopted into this family.
His hair was combed over his baldspot as usual. Shmit was a working man, he worked down at the ministry of magic and held a very secretive life, living in his attic bedroom when he was home and going to work at odd hours of the night. No one really knew what Shmit did all day, or what his perffesion was. His parent's wished that he would move out and pay for things with his salary, rather than living off them for the past 37 years. And believe me when i tell you, Shmit was a big fellow and it took ALOT to feed him. It had often been questioned weither he was part giant...
"What the bloody hell's going on here?" Shmit hollard over the others. They froze in their possitions. "Have you all gone mad?"
They looked down at their feet in shame. "Now you lot don't 'ave time to go around and be this odd. You all need to get to the train station before you're forced to drive our illegal flying muggle auto (car) and smash into the wampingwillow and nearly get suspended.........now what does that sound like deshavu(sp)?"
"Son, we don't own a flying muggle auto..."
Finally Peter screwed up enough courage to ask, "What's a wamping willow."
He was answered with a barrage of "SHUT UPS!". He wimpered before withdrawing into the fireplace.
Subject: my dad is singing and my head is about to explode bacause he sounds horrible!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Author:
James
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Date Posted: 13:12:44 05/20/03 Tue

James sat in anguish as his house became the sceen of mass chaos. Peter was trying to serenade Cara, which did not work as well as in the dream they had had. Mr. Potter was clutching his face and crying out in pain while Mrs. Potter hovered over him trying to heal his wounds. Remus had taken over Peter's position in trying to get the cat down, who was hissing and spitting. And then to top it all off, Sirius thought it would be funny to walk in dressed as Lord Voldemort, creating more panick in the tiny diningroom.
Subject: uh...mr. winstan meets the taxidermist!


Author:
fufu
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Date Posted: 12:10:23 05/20/03 Tue

"Arg!" Mr. Potter tried to throw the cat off, but misjudged his aim and Mr. Poofers landed atop the highest stove in the house (because, of course, there's more than one stove...).

Peter squealed, trying to reach the poor animal. "Get him down, get him down!!"

(hey, does anyone else think we should write a joint story about why they became Animagus' in the first place? we all know why, but how...that's a different story...)
Subject: daf


Author:
Peter
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Date Posted: 04:05:05 05/20/03 Tue

Mr. Poofers, who was still on Mr. Potter's face, let out an angry meow and dug in claws further into his flesh when Mr. Potter shook his head.
Subject: fun......mr. pooferz returns!!


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 13:49:01 05/19/03 Mon

(and where is chrissy?? ms. call-me-sure-ill-walk-w/-u...)
James looked down at his shirt. "Ug. Mom, you call this clean? It was new!"

This prompted a glare from his mother and his father shook his head.

"Son, don't enrage the bobcat, er, your mother. You know how she gets when you encourage her."
Subject: mooshoo


Author:
Peter
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Date Posted: 07:58:48 05/19/03 Mon

"Hm...where's Pe-"
Just then peter came falling down the chimney, landing in a cloud of soot. THe others coughed and weezed as the cloud expaded to cover the whole kitchen.
"My clean kitchen!" Mrs. Potter exclaimed, dropping the breakfast plate that she had been washing into the tub of water in the sink.
*cough weeze cough hack* "He-hi guys." Peter said through the soot.
"WHere are you?" James asked, stumbling out of his chair and tripping on Mr. Poofers (the petrified cat), who had come down the chimney as well. THe cat screamed and latched itself onto Mr. Potter's face, which had previously been hidden behind the morning paper.
"James! Get this bloody cat out of here!" Mr. Potter roared, standing up to smash his head on the lamp that had fallen out of the ceiling and was dangling dangerously close to the table.
"I would i if i could see." James replied dutifully.
"Ah! That pancake had black stuff on it." Remus complained, trying to wipe the soot off of his tongue.
"Everything's gone black, am i dying?" Peter's voice could be heard asking.
"Don't me a bloody idiot, Peter, you just came down the wrong part of the chimney." Sirius shot back.
Finally the soot settled, revealing the scene in it's full caotic detale. Remus was still scrapping his tongue off with a bar-b-q brush, James was cleaning off his glasses with his new white shirt, Mrs. Potter was yelling at him to stop dirtying his shirt and complaining about how dirty her kitchen had become in this relatively short time, Sirius was helping the blackened Peter up, Mr. Potter had aquired a tight bond with the phsycotic cat, Mr. Poofers, and in the midst of this all Cara came down the stairs. She tripped on the soot, tumbling down the stairs, into the hearth.
"Drat, not again." she murmured.
Peter straightened himself up and smiled at Cara in that odd hypnotic way of his. That kid always freaked her out, but he was kinda cute in a Pilsberry Doughboy-meets-the-human-race sorta way.
Subject: mooshoo


Author:
Peter
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Date Posted: 07:58:27 05/19/03 Mon

"Hm...where's Pe-"
Just then peter came falling down the chimney, landing in a cloud of soot. THe others coughed and weezed as the cloud expaded to cover the whole kitchen.
"My clean kitchen!" Mrs. Potter exclaimed, dropping the breakfast plate that she had been washing into the tub of water in the sink.
*cough weeze cough hack* "He-hi guys." Peter said through the soot.
"WHere are you?" James asked, stumbling out of his chair and tripping on Mr. Poofers (the petrified cat), who had come down the chimney as well. THe cat screamed and latched itself onto Mr. Potter's face, which had previously been hidden behind the morning paper.
"James! Get this bloody cat out of here!" Mr. Potter roared, standing up to smash his head on the lamp that had fallen out of the ceiling and was dangling dangerously close to the table.
"I would i if i could see." James replied dutifully.
"Ah! That pancake had black stuff on it." Remus complained, trying to wipe the soot off of his tongue.
"Everything's gone black, am i dying?" Peter's voice could be heard asking.
"Don't me a bloody idiot, Peter, you just came down the wrong part of the chimney." Sirius shot back.
Finally the soot settled, revealing the scene in it's full caotic detale. Remus was still scrapping his tongue off with a bar-b-q brush, James was cleaning off his glasses with his new white shirt, Mrs. Potter was yelling at him to stop dirtying his shirt and complaining about how dirty her kitchen had become in this relatively short time, Sirius was helping the blackened Peter up, Mr. Potter had aquired a tight bond with the phsycotic cat, Mr. Poofers, and in the midst of this all Cara came down the stairs. She tripped on the soot, tumbling down the stairs, into the hearth.
"Drat, not again." she murmured.
Peter straightened himself up and smiled at Cara in that odd hypnotic way of his. That kid always freaked her out, but he was kinda cute in a Pilsberry Doughboy-meets-the-human-race sorta way.
Subject: zebra


Author:
James' alter ego
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Date Posted: 06:45:35 05/19/03 Mon

"Why does everyone feel the need to coem to my house?!" James exclaimed. "And my name isn't Jamesy!"

REmus and Sirius grinned. "We just like to bug you," they said simply.

"It was me, sweetie," Mrs. Potter piped up. "I talked to their parents and agreed to take them to the train station. I hope you don't mind."
Subject: NOT ANOTHER ONE!!!!....ok, ill play


Author:
Fufu Lupin
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Date Posted: 05:02:14 05/19/03 Mon

"Uhhh..." Remus blinked several times, casting more confused glances toward the ceiling.

Mr. Potter twitched. "Are you okay?"

James cocked his head. "Dad, when exactly did you develop a twitch?"

"You have one too, Jamesy," Sirius said, hopping over the fence to enter the house.
Subject: xylaphone


Author:
James
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Date Posted: 17:33:28 05/18/03 Sun

(lol sorry thats right. Lauren's our voice of reason not chels)

James looked skyward suspiciously, but said nothing. Remus saw him though, and glanced nerverously at the celing.

"You don't think..." he began. But James shook his head vigorously. "No." he said definately. "It was just a dream, remember."

Mr. Potter looked up from his paper and stared at the boys. "You two feeling ok?" he asked them.
Subject: meep


Author:
peter
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Date Posted: 17:11:13 05/18/03 Sun

(i thought i was peter's alter-ego, not Remus')
James and Remus dug into their breakfast ravinously.
"How come you're at my house?" james inquired through the pancakes.
"I 'ont know." Remus replied, dipping his toast into his egg yolk.
"You just felt like coming over here?" James replied, swallowing his mouthful.
"Yeah, i guess.
Subject: THE NEW STORY


Author:
James
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Date Posted: 17:04:48 05/18/03 Sun

HERE WE GO! LADIES AND..... LADIES, I PRESENT, THE SECOND EDITION OF HARRY POTTER SPOOF, HARRY POTTER SPOOF, 2!!!!! YAY!!!!!!

~~~~~*****~~~~~*****~~~~~*****~~~~~*****~~~~~*****~~~~~

James scratched his head. He flintched as his mother flung open the curtains to his room, letting in a blast of sunlight.

"Mom!" he cried. "Common, just a few more minuets?"

"You said that a few minuets ago," she scolded. "Now get upand come down for breakfast. Its late and you need to get to the station by 11 o'clock."

James grumbled and looked at the foot of his bed. His robes were laid out neatly for him to slip into, which he did slower than a turtle.

When he finally got down stairs, he found Remus sitting at his table.

"Hello!" greeted the marauder warmly. "Eggs?" he held up the plate in james' face.

James wrinkled his face and sat down next to Remus, helping himself to some pancakes.

"I was having the weirdest dream last night," said Remus, eating his bacon. "I dreamnt that we were all being controlled by a bunch of editors and their math teacher, and we had alter egos too. mine was... erm... Chels they called her."

James looked startled. "You mean you had that dream too?" he asked anxiously.

"Wow, you had it too?" Remus responded.

"I just asked you that," James grumbled.

"Oh, sorry." Remus went back to his breakfast. "I wonder if Sirius and Peter had that dream also..." he wondered out lound.
Subject: OFFICIAL ENG :)


Author:
cHELS
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 16:29:42 05/18/03 Sun

THAT WAS THE END, FOLKS. AFTER THIS IS THE NEXT ONE!!!!
Subject: quiters never win!


Author:
Chrissy
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Date Posted: 16:28:55 05/18/03 Sun

OK GUESS WHAT EVERYONE!!!!!! THIS IS OFFICALLY THE END OF HARRY POTTER SPOOF #1!!!!!!! THIS PORTION IS BEING MOVED INTO A SPECIAL ARCHIVE AND WE WILL BE STARTING A NEW ONE AS SOON AS I CAN FIGURE OUT HOW TO START IT!!!!!!! SO HOLD ON TO YOUR HORSES WHILE I GET ANOTHER STORY GOING!!!!!!!

~~Chrissy, The Story Commando~~ :)
Subject: THE END!!!!!! YAY!!!!!!!


Author:
James
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Date Posted: 16:23:05 05/18/03 Sun

(lets see now... what does everyone think? we can end this here, and start a new one.)

James woke up just as Lauren was about to start her explaination. He looked around. Where was he? He was relieved to find he was still in his bedroom safe at home. He turned over to look at his calender. It was the night before he left for hogwarts. Getting out of bed, he walked over to the telephone in the living room. He picked it up and listened for a moment to the dial tone. "Stupid muggle contraption..." he grumbled aloud, dialing his friend Remus' number. When he got a 'non-exisiting number' lecture from the opporator, he remembered that Remus didn't own a muggle phone, but Sirius did. The thing rang several times before a sleepy voice said "'Ello?" into the reciever.

"Sirius?" yawned James.

"Yeah... what ya want James?" Sirius grumbled.

"What year are we in in school?" he asked.

"We start 4th year tomorrow. Why?"

James grinned. "Do you know a Madison?"

Sirius scratched his head. "You mean Madison Smit, third year from school?"

"Nah, never mind."

"James, it's 3 in the morning," yawned Sirius into the reciever. "Put down this silly muggle thing and just go to sleep. Or maybe you can call on Peter. He loves getting up early."

"Ok. Night."

"Night."

James went back up stairs into his room and snuggled soundly into his bed. "No editors... no alter ego... no story..." he muttered as he fell asleep.

What he didn't realize, in his drowzy state, was that staring into her computer screen, typing away into a Harry Potter Spoof forum, finishing the story the boy and his friends had just participated in, was his own alter-ego, Chrissy, who smiled as she entered the last period into the sleepy boy's dream.
Subject: my o my o my


Author:
James feeling very stuffy
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Date Posted: 11:56:46 05/18/03 Sun

(who were they anyway?)

"Hey, was that us?" Chissy asked in wonder.

"Yeah Lauren," chorused the rest of the mafia. "Who were they?"

"Well, er, um," Lauren began, searching for the right words.
Subject: fads


Author:
Chels
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Date Posted: 18:58:21 05/17/03 Sat

(paddleball? don't u mean pingpong?)
"I love paddleball!" Chels squealed and the others had to hold her back from getting out of hiding
Subject: umm....o


Author:
fufu
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Date Posted: 18:41:33 05/17/03 Sat

(cuz i felt like making u fall asleep)

Lauren tried to leap up, but bashed her head on the bed, which she was still under. Groaning in pain, she muttered, "We need to stop him. He belongs with us, he's the only one who can stop Chels from going nuts...I mean.."

Chelsea glared. "That wasn't very nice."

At total random, a group of children appeared, merrily playing paddle-ball. A woman stepped in as the ball bounced off the table and under her foot. As the Muffins watched, she grinned and shook her head at the children before crushing the ball beneath her foot.

"That wasn't very nice..." Chelsea repeated as they all disappeared.

Maddi blinked. "Well, that was completely irrelevent."
Subject: masked


Author:
Peter
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Date Posted: 18:18:10 05/17/03 Sat

(here's the part i meant to type earlier)
"You know what he's doing." Chrissy started.
Maddi and Chels looked at one another and shook their heads in response.
"Trying to find a decent pool table?" Lauren offered.
Chrissy just shook her head in disgust, "He's writing himself out!"
"OoooOooo" the others ooed in enlightenment
Subject: poool


Author:
peter
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Date Posted: 12:09:37 05/17/03 Sat

(why'd i fall asleep?)
Chrissy quickly grabbed the Marauder's Map just before the Marauders etered, drenched in ink and bruised.
"I can't believe he got away." James muttered.
"I can't believe he's steal pens and ink, of all things." SIrius responded.
The Mafia was huddled around the map, watching that dot that was Mr. Kopas slinking down the cooridoors.
Subject: uhhhh...what?


Author:
fufu the confused math student
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Date Posted: 11:55:36 05/17/03 Sat

"What was that?" Lauren demanded because everyone had once again left her out of the planning. "Was that Mr. Kopas?"

"Duh," Maddi deadpanned. "And down we go."

The Muffins fell off the ceiling onto Lupin's bed where Chels promptly fell asleep. Tara kicked her.

"Wake up! The Marauders are coming back!"

The Mafia hid under the beds as the others came back upstairs...
Subject: akkkkkk


Author:
Peter
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Date Posted: 11:37:12 05/17/03 Sat

Tara, using her newly discovered telepathic abilities, announced that she had to sneeze to the others. They looked at her with shock and fear, one for they didn't know she could talk telepathically, and two because a sneeze would surely give away their positions and foil their plot.
All at once the others yelled, "Potatoe!", "Bless You!", "Gene Shnider!", "Gazunite!", "Book!".
"Did you just hear that?" Lupin asked, looking about the room with suspicion.
"Hm...ya..." James agreed.
"Could it be--"
Suddenly the shape of the phantom math teacher could be seen in the doorway. His glasses reflected the light for a second, giving him a demonic eye-glow. But then he was off, sprinting down the darkened hallway towards the commonroom.
"Get him!"
Peter squealed like a girl and fainted. The others chased after the math teacher.
"Hurry! He's got quills and ink!" Sirius yelled, slipping on a small puddle of ink that had been left behind by the hustling teacher.
"Gah!" Lupin fell onto Sirius, who went to grab a hand rail, but instead grabbed James' foot, pulling him down ontop of them.
"Bly me!"
"He's getting away!" Lupin stated the obvious.
"We can all bloodywell see that!" growled Sirius.
****Meanwhile*****
THe Mafia, still secured to the cieling.
"But he was saposed to get us down from here..."Chels wimpered.
Subject: wat's happening here?


Author:
fufu
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Date Posted: 12:48:41 05/16/03 Fri

"Hey!" Fufu complained from the celing in which all the Muffins were embedded, the better to spy on, er, watch, their targets. "I'm so confused!"

Lupin looked up. "Did you guys hear--"

Lauren wrote a quick, 'And Lupin heard nothing' and he shook his head.

"Never mind..."

"I love having the power," Lauren said happily.
Subject: oufgwbc


Author:
Sirius
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Date Posted: 07:04:33 05/16/03 Fri

"That's all very lovely, James. But it's time to go home now. There are no Muffins, and you don't play the position of seeker. You're a chaser, and you're all in deep trouble. Detentions at least for a week, I'd wager. And Professor Dumbledore won't be too happy about this breach of trust, Mr. Lupin. What's this I hear about you three being Animagi?" Professor McGonagall asked from the shadows behind them. "Mr. Rodgers is dead. You four will need to return home, and take that math teacher with you." she said to the muffin mafia. "and today in transfiguration we're having a...spanish feista!"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" screamed the Marauders, sitting up in their beds at once.

"whoo, it was just a dream." James panted.

"Wait, you heard that too?"

"Yeah."

"Weird how when the muffins run out of plot twists, we always wake up. I wonder when something really happened last..."

"Maybe it's because of something else..." Sirius thought out loud.

"Why are you thinking out loud?" Peter asked.

"I wasn't." Sirius replied.

James gasped. "We can read each other's minds!"

"So we're submitting one another to each other's nightmares?"

"Yes!"

"And the Muffins don't exist?"

"Yes!"

"And I really don't have a sister?"

"Yes!"

"And your name is Pooters?"

"Yes--no!" James cried.
Subject: kkkkkkkkkk


Author:
Peter
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Date Posted: 06:54:02 05/16/03 Fri

There was pleasant clapping after James' tale of brave danger and petty offense was over.
"HELP!" Lauren screamed. Everyone turned to look at her. She collapsed and fell out of her chair.
"Oh no, too much wholesome goodness in one dose is never good."
"To the hospital wing!"
"She can't go, she's a muggle."
"Do we discriminate?"
Subject: ummm....wat?


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 17:17:37 05/15/03 Thu

"Hey!" Lauren yelled from her chair where Mr. Rogers was lecturing her on the benifets of cleanliness. "Isn't this guy supposed to be dead???"

Everyone else ignored her, capitvated by James' tales of extraordinary Quiddich moves.

"And then, just as I thought they had me, I managed to pull off a fabuolous dive snd got away just in the nick of bloody time!"

"Guys?" Lauren called weakly. "Help?"

Her cries were drowned out by James' scream of, "AND THE BLUDGER NEARLY GOT ME!!"
Subject: kooly


Author:
James
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Date Posted: 15:47:38 05/15/03 Thu

As the girls drank their tea and giggled over Lauren's agony, the boys shook their heads and directed their attention to James's new Nimbus.

"Your mum bought that for you?" asked Peter. James grinned.

"Bet your dad was angry when he heard you busted up your last one flying it IN THE SCHOOL!" laughed Sirius.

"You have NO idea," James said with a shiver.
Subject: miyazaki


Author:
Sirius
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 06:00:14 05/15/03 Thu

Moments later, Fufu's eyes were duct taped open and she was being forced to watch ever Disney movie ever made, while bubble gum and other gooey candies were being waved under her nose.

"stop, no!" she cried. at once, a happy old guy popped up behind her.

"This is mr. bow-wow, and this is miss moo-moo, and we want to be your friend!"

"No! No mr. rodgers, no!" she screamed. "make it stop, make it stop!"

***meanwhile***

the marauders and the rest of the muffins were calmly drinking tea. James and Sirius were sitting on Remus to prevent him from rescuing his alter-ego.

"...and what does it mean to have and/or be an alter-ego?" Maddi asked Chels, who shrugged.

"free tea?" Chrissy suggested.
Subject: ah! and u yell at me for charmed!


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 05:55:43 05/15/03 Thu

"NO! NOT! EVIL! PINK! FLOYD!" Lauren yelled as she bashed her head against a wall.

"Hey!" Maddi called. "Let's do everything in out power to drive the Fufu crazy!"

"Ready?" Chels asked. "GO!"
Subject: froobven


Author:
Sirius
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 05:53:19 05/15/03 Thu

Maddi paused, "for I am the mighty Zoltar, and all quake at my presence."

she jumped up on a table and began to sing...

"Ticking away the moments that make up a dull day, you fritter and waste the hours in an offhand way, kicking around on a piece of ground in your home town, waiting for someone or something to show you the way, tired of lying in the sunshine staying home to watch the rain, you are young and there is time to kill today, and then one day you find that ten years have got behind you, no one told you where to run, you missed the starting gun, and you run and you run to catch up with the sun but it's shrinking, and racing around to come up behind you again, the sun is the same in a relative way but you're older, shorter of breath and one day closer to death, every year is getting shorter never seem to find the time, plans that either come to naught or half a page of scribbled lines, hanging on in quiet desperation is the english way, the time is gone, the song is over, thought I'd something more to say."

the mafia blinked in confusion, and Fufu muttered menacingly, "was that Pink Floyd?"

"Time, Dark Side of the Moon," Maddi replied.

She banged her head on the nearest wall, which Lupin ran to prevent from injuring her.
Subject: uh.....maddi? we really should commit u...


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 05:39:55 05/15/03 Thu

"Who the heck is Felix the cat??" Lauren demanded. No one bothered to answer her as everyone was gathered about Maddi's conputer as she typed.

Without a heck of a lot of warning, Mr. Kopas shot out of the disk drive. He hit the floor with a thump, looked around and howled in agony.

"NOT AGIAN!!!!" he yelled. "LEAVE ME OUT OF THIS BLOODY STORY!!!"

"Hey, Mr. K is going British," Chelsea cried happily.

Maddi cheerfully draped a long cloak around the math teacher's shoulders. "You are our blessed king," she intoned, bowing.

"Yeah, the Shrub's got nothing on you!" Lauren said brightly.

Instantly, all the Muffins had rounded on her. "Don't ever speak that name," Maddi hissed, "in my presence."
Subject: oogle


Author:
Sirius
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 05:32:25 05/15/03 Thu

CHELSEA, THE VOODO MASTER, RANDOMALLY HOPPED UP AND DOWN WHILE COMPLETING HER SCARY RAINDANCE.

"WE NEED A WEBSITE WITH ALL OUR SCARY STORIES ON IT!" MADDI EXCLAIMED, TYPING AWAY AT THE LAPTOP. AT TOTAL RANDOM, THE MARAUDERS AND THE MUFFINS WERE TRANSPORTED TO...DUM DUM DUH...THE WORLD OF FELIX THE CAT.

*A BREIF INTERLUDE*

"HEY," FUFU SAID, LEANING OVER TO READ THE POST BEFORE MADDI CLICKED 'SEND', "YOU'RE TYPING IN ALL CAPS."

"I KNOW," SHE SAID CHEERILY.

FUF SHOOK HER HEAD AND RETURNED TO HER MERRY TYPING.

*END OF BREIF'S INTERLUDE*

"WHY AM I IN BLACK AND WHITE?!" FUF SCREAMED, TRYING TO SCRIBBLE COLOR ONTO HERSELF, BUT ONLY SUCCEEDING IN ADDING MORE SHADES OF BLACK TO HER GOTHIC ATTIRE.

"BECAUSE WE'VE ALL GONE TO A HAPPY PLACE," MADDI SAID IN A CALM VOICE.

"ARE YOU OKAY?" CHELS ASKED HER, TRYING TO SNATCH THE LAPTOP.

"MAYBE..."

"HEY! OY, ALTER-EGO, MICKY OR WHATEVER--"

"IT'S MADDI!" SHE YELLED

"--SEND US HOME!" SIRIUS CRIED.

"CLICK YOUR SHOES, BECAUSE," MADDI HOPPED UP, GIVING THE MUFFINS THE LAPTOP, "I AM YOUR FAIRY GODMOTHER, AND YOU'RE A GOOSE!"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" FUF CRIED.

"I THOUGHT WE LOST OUR MEANS OF WRITING..." CHELS MUMBLED.

"THIS ONLY MEANS ONE THING," CHRISSY ANNOUNCED.

"THE RETURN OF MR. KOPAS!" THE MAFIA CHOROUSED REVERENTLY.
Subject: mooshi!


Author:
Chels
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Date Posted: 18:11:49 05/14/03 Wed

Chels cackled evily and yelled, "I am the true LORD OF THE DEAD!" into the vast darkness of the forest. She then danced about happily, shaking a voodoo magic stick with a skull on the top and an interesting snake around her waist.
Suddenly the marauders and mafia weren't in Kansas...i mean the woods anymore. Instead they were on some small tropic island suffounded by palm trees and hungry natives. A large cookfired burned brightly in the center of the circle. They were all strapped to thick poles that stuck out from their firm implantments in the ground. Their clothes were dirtied and smelled of many day's sweat.
Chrissy sniffed and wrinkled her nose, "Ew. I smell, and i took a shower this morning too." she then winced in pain from her cronic soccer ingery to her forhead.
"You okay?" Maddi asked from the next pole over.
But Chrissy was it too much pain to reply and Lauren yelled in a frightened voice, "Oh no! SHe's getting inside our minds!"
The crowd errupted into native chant as Chels, clad in native war paint and the ceramonial tucan dress walked through the crowd. A lul fell over them and the Marauder/Mafia were left to wonder what awaited them.
Subject: umm........bored bored bored


Author:
fufu
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Date Posted: 17:58:14 05/14/03 Wed

"OH MY GOD, ITS A NINJA MONKEY FROM MARS!!!" Chrissy yelled.

Chels sighed in exhasperation. "Come now, Christine, that's not a monkey. Clearly, it's a mule of doom."

"Oh." Chrissy pondered this, then said, "OH MY GOD, ITS A MULE OF DOOM!!!"

"Uh..." Lupin raised his hand. "Can I say something?"

"Sure," Chels told him in a dangerously cheery voice.

"That thing in the tree would be a dwarve," he informed her as Peter nodded his head so fast that Maddi was forced to ask, "Can you say 'whiplash'?"

Chelsea's eyes bugged out. "How dare you question my creatures!"

Lupin blanched. "B-but I--"

"Silence, fiend!" Chels yelled, pulling out a wand that had magically appeared in the pocket of her robes. "Zippero!"

Lupin's mouth zipped shut at Chels' command and he tugged frantically at his lips. "Mmmmph!!"

James wandered onto the scene, wearing a white T-shirt and a pair of boxer shorts. "Hey, that's my robe..." he whined to Chels, who pretended to ignore him.

"And my wand!" Sirius added, limping over with a bloody lip adn a black eye. "And if I'd had it, I wouldn't have this interesting scar in teh shape of Jamaca on my chin, would I? I would've been able to fight back against that demonic caterpillar that Snape siccked on me..."

"Hey!" Maddi and Chrissy yelled together. "Why did you do that to out alter-egos??"

Chels shrugged and all three of them turned to watch as Lauren attemted to tug her alter-ego's mouth back open. She glanced over her shoulder.

"Don't look at me, I can't even draw my alter-ego...."
Subject: kjha


Author:
peret
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Date Posted: 17:32:37 05/14/03 Wed

"That and jumping on the back of the couch and looking out the window."
No one suspected the small glowing green gnomes as they slid stealthily down their ninja ropes...
Subject: Aggg!!!


Author:
fufu
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Date Posted: 16:17:56 05/14/03 Wed

(chels, do u have a thing for dwarves?)

"Chelsea..." Lauren's tone was warning. "Where did those come from?"

Chels gulped, wondering if she'd noticed the dwarves she had so "sneakily" placed in that tree. "Where did what come from?"

Lauren pointed accusingly at the screen. "Those extra eyestalks on the top of my head! I don't have those, erase them now!"

Chels gave a sigh of relief even as Maddi grinned triumphantly. "I will not!"

"So you put them there?" Lauren demanded.

"No." Maddi typed something quickly, then stepped bakc from the Mac. "You did."

The words on the front of picture-Lauren's hoodie said, Yauren did this to you.

"That's an upside down Y, not an L!" Lauren screeched. "And I most certainly did not write that! I don't like to mess people's pictures up!"

"Yes you do, it's your secret pasttime..." Chels muttered.
Subject: mesquito


Author:
Chels
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Date Posted: 04:05:38 05/14/03 Wed

Lauren had shut her eyes tight and had clamped her hands over her ears as she fled. Chrissy was hot on her heels the whole times, but occationally reached out to poke lauren in the right direction.
They ran like that for a while and finally they ran out of breath, Chrissy was tired from singing and Lauren from trying to escape Chrissy's singing. James puffed far behind them trying to catch up.
Chrissy leaned up against a tree humming the lumberjack song between gasps for breath. And Lauren sat against a large gray boulder. Unbeknowns to them a small band of green glowing dwarfs was watching them from the tops of the trees.
Subject: plop


Author:
James is sooooooooooooo bored
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Date Posted: 16:57:10 05/13/03 Tue

"HE'S A LUMBERJACK AND HE'S OK!!!!!!" Chrissy screeched in her most awful singing voice. Lauren ran away into the woods with Chrissy behind her.

"Not again..." James huffed, running after them.
Subject: oo, funness


Author:
fufu
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Date Posted: 16:36:12 05/13/03 Tue

(hey, i just went back and read all of the postings in teh archives 1 area and has any1 else noticed that there's been, like, 3 school nurses? I found that very amusing...and where did Andy run off to?)
Subject: *pause*


Author:
fufu
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Date Posted: 10:25:03 05/13/03 Tue

Lauren nodded very slowly. "Uh...yes. Yeah, I get it."

Lupin began again, trying this time to explain the rest of the basics of forestry. Madison and Chelsea elbowed him out of the way, exclaiming, "We can help better than you!"

They then began to sing, "I'm a lumber jack and I'm okay...." as loudly as they could. Lauren clamped her hands over her ears. "NOOOOO!!!!"

Maddi stopped mid-song. "Hey, lets go attack people's pictures!" She and Chrissy flocked to Mr. K's computer and began to hit buttons as Lauren continued to screech, "NOOOO!!!"
Subject: marage


Author:
Peter
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Date Posted: 17:38:26 05/12/03 Mon

"Let's start at the base of your odd mind. Trees are plants. Are you with me so far?" Lupin attempted.
Subject: uh.....sorry for the double post


Author:
fufu
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Date Posted: 17:29:01 05/12/03 Mon

"A forest?" Lauren nodded knowingly to herself. "I may not have brains, but I am smart!"

Lupin blanched. "Why me?"

"I ask myself that all the time," James muttered, pointing at Chrissy, the girl who doesn't know what trees are...(this seems like it should have a backstory, or an inside joke or something....)
Subject: ggg


Author:
James
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Date Posted: 16:21:45 05/12/03 Mon

(hey! i'm off in the forest somewhere!)

Chrissy skipped back into the clearing happily, while James lagged behind panting and sweaty.

"Where were you?" asked Maddi, hopping around Lupin.

"Grrr.." he growled."Ok, lets start from the begining. Who gave you the sugar?"

"I found a neat place with lots of shiny green stuff!" Chrissy exclaimed. James just noddded/
Subject: Oliver Oliver...


Author:
Peter
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Date Posted: 16:13:04 05/12/03 Mon

"Darn..." Lupin snapped his fingers and turned to a young pauper who had just appeared. Oliver, the pauper, raised his fingerless-gloved hand up in a plea for money, "Please, sir, just a shilling."
"Bloody muggles." Maddi murmured but was elbowed in the ribs by Tara.
"We are muggles!" Tara reminded.
Subject: hi, im back...


Author:
fufu
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Date Posted: 10:28:07 05/12/03 Mon

Wolverine finished his carving and Chels attempted to poke it again.

"I want one!" she yelled. Wolverine flinched.

"I have super hearing," he told her, annoyed. "Yelling is painful for my delicate ears."

She continued to screech. "I WANT A ZEUS STATUE!! GIVE ME A ZEUS STATUE!!!"

Wolverine clamped his hands over his ears and seemed to shrink. Gradually, he became Lauren again, claws and fun spiked hair gone.

"Why did you do that??" she demanded of Chels, who grinned.

"I think we found her trigger," she said happily. "This is how we get her to turn back whenever she morphs. Make her deaf!!"

"Uhh.." Lupin raised one hand. "Can I say something against destroying the hearing of my alter-ego?"

"No," Chrissy shot back cheerily.
Subject: hi, im back...


Author:
fufu
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Date Posted: 10:23:54 05/12/03 Mon

Wolverine finished his carving and Chels attempted to poke it again.

"I want one!" she yelled. Wolverine flinched.

"I have super hearing," he told her, annoyed. "Yelling is painful for my delicate ears."

She continued to screech. "I WANT A ZEUS STATUE!! GIVE ME A ZEUS STATUE!!!"

Wolverine clamped his hands over his ears and seemed to shrink. Gradually, he became Lauren again, claws and fun spiked hair gone.

"Why did you do that??" she demanded of Chels, who grinned.

"I think we found her trigger," she said happily. "This is how we get her to turn back whenever she morphs. Make her deaf!!"

"Uhh.." Lupin raised one hand. "Can I say something against destroying the hearing of my alter-ego?"

"No," Chrissy shot back cheerily.
Subject: ............


Author:
James
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Date Posted: 18:17:26 05/11/03 Sun

"OO pretty," sighed Chels, leaning in to touch it.
Wolverine responded by slapping her hand. "No touchie!" he declared, setting to work on the rest of the tree.
Subject: mermaid!


Author:
Peter
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Date Posted: 18:04:45 05/11/03 Sun

"Don't worry, i'll write for her." Maddi grinned evily as she rubbed her hands together. Wolverine twitched and then returned to scratching a tree. Soon he had carved an elligant sculpture of Zeus out of the base of the tree.
Subject: blah blah blah-de-blah


Author:
James
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Date Posted: 17:56:37 05/11/03 Sun

Chrissy began running away deeper into the forest as a squirrel ballon she had made tried to latch itself to her arm. James ran after her, shouting, "Wait! That part's dangerous! What am I supposed to do if my alter-ego gets herself killed?!"
Subject: Marauders.


Author:
Peter
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Date Posted: 17:53:47 05/11/03 Sun

"PLease? Wont you just love me? PLease, please, PLEASE!?!?!" Chels yelled at the blank Mr. Winston as she dangled a piece of shrimp six inches away from his nose.
"Why??????" she beat her fists violently against the ground.
A few feet away Chrissy was making fun balloon animals and the Marauders were casting spells to make them alive.
"Mr. Kopas you can fly!" Lupin said giddily and Maddi glared at him.
"Where did you get my phrase from?"
"I guess it's just stuck in my head, you guys just say it so much."
Subject: well this is just...neat


Author:
fufu
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Date Posted: 07:07:17 05/11/03 Sun

"Bwahahahaha!!" exclaimed Chrissy. "You think you're so special jsut because you can do that..thing with your head...but look what I can do!"

She pulled out a balloon and blew it up, twisting it so it looked like a chipmunk. "Ha!" she said triumphantly, poking it at Annie, who howled and collapsed upon herself.

"I am the master!" Chrissy bellowed, popping the balloon. Chels crawled over to her.

"Could I please have a mouse balloon?"

Chrissy obliged and Chels took her prize to Winston and offered it to him meekly. The cat did and said nothing and Chels broke down.

"God! All I wanted was for you to love me!" she howled to her uncaring ex-husband. "That's why I killed you! And brought you back! And ate a washing machine for you!!!"

"How sad..." Lupin remarked.

(will winston ever take chels back? will lauren ever stop being wolverine?? Will Annie ultimatly return? and what ever happened with Sirius and that killer caterpillar?? tune in next time to find out....)
Subject: Demon Annie Strikes Again!


Author:
Chels
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Date Posted: 21:27:50 05/10/03 Sat

(i know he wasn't mortally wounded! That's why he lept up. It was sort of a trick or something. I dont know. I was having serious writter's cramp when it comes to this Harry Potter stuff. And actually Lily had broken Sirius' arm. Because he had been the one who told her James was mortally wounded. Nevermind...it was lost in the translation of thought to word)

It was quite an odd sight that the Marauders were greeted with. Chels sat pleading for Winston to take her back, wolverine/lauren was scratching at a tree, maddi and tara were still in a deep state of shock after discovering who lauren and chrissy really were, and Annie was singing 'Tomorrow Tomorrow'.
"Bloody 'ell, they've all gone looney." Peter commented, his eyes wide and half a coffincake still in his mouth.
"Please Winston, i miss you too much. And with your condition and all i think i should take care of you." Chels pleaded to her ex-husband. He flicked his tail impaciently at her and looked away as if she did not exist.
And odd man dressed as a golfer came out of the brush, "It's a sad state, muadern marriages. There's nuttin to 'old 'em together. Woat's the world coummin to?" (saposed to be spelled like that, it's irish. O by the way. I have taken a renewed interest in my Irish heritage after watching a good good movie starring Piece Brosnan called 'Evelyne')
The strange golfer wandered through the Mafia's camp and back into the woods singing some 'Danny Boy', which clashed terribly with Annie's singing of Ms. Hannigan's 'Little Girls' song.
Maddi and Tara stared in terror at the dancing and singing Annie, still trying to understand how some vague shell of Christine could somehow be hidden within the abiss of a little girl...a fro...a monster...ah!
The REAL Christine popped her head out of the bushes between Tara and Maddi, "What's wrong? Ah! Where'd you find Annie?"
"Hey! It's you!" Maddi yelled happily, as she checked to make sure that Chrisssy's face was properly attached to her head, which it was.
Suddenly the music stopped and Annie glared at Chrissy. She bellowed out a demonic, "YOU!" that echoed off the trees in the Forbidden Forest.
Wolverine let out a squeak before climbing up a tree to safety.
Demon-Annie's eyes glowed red and (death awaites you all with)sharp pointy teeth. Her head spun around, causing Chels to wonder aloud, "How come i can't do that?"
Subject: uhhh...


Author:
fufu
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Date Posted: 15:04:05 05/10/03 Sat

(yes, it is my secret... i am, and always have been, the Wolverine!! Bwahahah!! *pause* and what's witht he mortally wounded crap, Chels, James was stuck speaking Spanish! He wasn't being mauled by an animal...or was he?)

Two hours after the Quidditch game, which Gryffendor won quickly, James, Peter and Lupin were wandering along. Sirius had been sent back to the hospital wing after he was viciously mauled by a killer caterpillar.

Unfortuanatly for the Mauraders, they were walking in the Forbidden Forest...though they knew they weren'y allowed to be there. They had no idea what was happening just 28 feet ahead of them...

***28 feet ahead of them***

The Wolverine-who-had-once-been-Lauren was facing off with Annie-who-had-once-been-Chrissy, claws out, hair poking up in interesting cone shapes. Annie's hair was a giant fro, causing Chels to yell, "The Fro has finally returned!!"

"No, she's still in hibernation," Annie informed the poor misguided editor. "I'm the real danger!"

Wolverine leapt for the evil orphan's throat, claws outstretched, but the demon child was faster than she looked. Claws scraped madly at nothing, until Chels, annoyed with the scene in general, pulled out a scratching post from behind a sycamore and thrust it before the mutant Fufu. Wolverine began scratching the post happily until....

...Winston the cat appeared and dragged the post, which Chels had stolen from his apartment once upon a time, away.

"Aww, Winnie, don't be like that," Chels whined, but the cat was purposly ignoring his ex-wife as he strutted away, fur sticking up.

Wolverine scowled and went back to trying to destroy Annie, and this is where Lupin and the others appeared....
Subject: aldjfa


Author:
Peter
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Date Posted: 10:25:01 05/10/03 Sat

(mwahahah! I have not fallen into the pit of impending doom! I have caught up on the story. Many scarey changes...and Maddi, i'm afraid you'll just have to eat me after this post.)

******************Back at the Bat Cave*****************
Oops, let me try again
*****************Back with the Mafia*******************
After realising their hopeless situation the Muffin Mafia had taken refuge in the eerie and damp Dark Forest.It was a hard new life, but with Chrissy lighting the fires at noon and Tara putting the fires out with her face at night, they were getting along well.
They had looked for possible jobs in the Daily Prophet, but all of the jobs required wizarding experence. There was one job, feeding the werewolves in a curcis that Chels had taken.
One night they sat around the campfire munching on tree bark, their only available source of food, when suddenly Maddi stood up.
"Yes! That's it!"
The others starred back at her inquisitively, "What?"
"We'll start a cult! It's a fictional world! We'll concur it with reason!"
Chels replied, "Perhaps i'm too tired, or mayb i've had too much bark, but that doesn't sound terribly bad. How about it?"
Lauren groned but reluctantly joined on. Chrissy, though, protested, "We can't do that! The other us don't want us in the story any more. They've stuck us here without anything to write on."
"The Other Us?" Tara repeated.
"Yes. Our other selves that have really been writing the story."
"WHat?!?!"
"We're clones?"
Chrissy sighed, "I didn't want it to have to come to this." and she pulled off her face to reveal...little orphan Annie!
The others, minus lauren, gasped and drew back in fear.
Lauren stepped forward towards Chrissy, or is it Annie?
Maddi reached out to pull her back, but couldn't reach her, "No fufu! Now is not the time to be heroic! Come back! She'll sing you to death!"
But lauren paid no mind and proceeded to pull off her face to. From the back the Mafia could see the oddly shaped hair of Wolverine.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" the shivering tara maddi and chels yelled.
*******Meanwhile, back at the school*************
James clutched his throat and the Madame P. rolled her eyes before casting the counter spell.
That evening Lily sat on the edge of James' hospital bed near to tears. James was asleep and looked weak.
"Don't let me loose him. I can't live without him! I love him!" She told some invisible diety. James sturred ever so slowly and opened his eyes to look at her. He smiled and attempted to talk, but Lily pressed a finger against his lips and gave a soft 'shhhhh'. James didn't resist.
"Shhh. Don't talk you're still very weak." she cooed.
With a few small movements Lily sat with James' head on her lap, stroking his hair affectionately.
"I was so worried. I was afraid your were going to die."
James frowned. As Lily continued to babble on about love and stuff Sirius and Lupin came in.
"Come on James, you'll be late for the Quiddich game." Sirius yelled.
James sprung out of bed and replied, "Be right there!"
Lily growled, "Hey! You tricked me! I thought you were mortally wounded!"
"No. I never said that."
"Well Sirius-Hey! Come back here Black!" Lily went and tackled Sirius. By the time the game finally started Sirius was in a cast sitting in the stands.
Subject: hey, hope this works...


Author:
fufu
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Date Posted: 10:21:48 05/09/03 Fri

(wat is w/ this Spanish stuff??)

Madame Pomfrey frowned as James babbled helplessly in Spanish. "What..what are you saying??"

She stared hard at the boy, then turned frantically to Lupin. "He wasn't speaking Spanish before! I've seen this boy hundreds of times, never has he shown any interest in another language!'

Lupin shrugged helplessly back. "I know. It was a cur--er, an accident. My friend meant to fix his glasses..."

Madame Pomfrey looked a bit suspicious, but asked, "I don't suppose you know Spanish?"

"Not a word." Lupin shook his head. "Sorry. But this spell may help." He pointed his wand at James, muttered, "Englascio."

Instantly, James said, "Thanks Moony! Appreciate it!"

No one noticed Sirius, hidden just behind a counter, as he muttered, "Silencio." (which is a reall HP spell..yay! Fufu's up on the times!!)

James tried to say, "And where's Sirius, I have to go brutally maul him," but nothing came out of his mouth. He clutched at his throat and made hoarse, raspy noises before leaping for Lupin's throat.
Subject: : )


Author:
James
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Date Posted: 07:00:31 05/09/03 Fri

(think you could provide me a translation?)

James went to the hospital wing to get himself fixed, but he had a hard time getting to Madame Pomfrey, considering she didn 't know any Spanish.
Subject: time to have some fun (at last)


Author:
Sirius
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Date Posted: 06:55:19 05/09/03 Fri

While the Muffin Mafia whimpered on the roof, the Marauders calmly returned to class, abandoning their alter-egos for good. (A/N: you put us back in, I hurt you. I've got way too many pranks to write about myself any more.)

While they were struggling to keep their brains from melting into mush in History of Magic, the Marauders were sitting under a table plotting the Prank of Pranks.

Of course, because everyone else in the class had been reduced to a near-vegetable state, there was no one to stop them. At total random, James and Sirius stood up and climbed on top of their desks.

Pointing their wands towards Binns, the ghostly professor, they whispered a little spell and jumped back under the table with Cara, Lily, Remus, and Peter.

Moments later, the room began to choke on the thick cloud of chalk dust that had been created by the multiple erasers clapping inside professor Binns. Of course, the Marauders could hardly keep from sniggering openly in class, and so they stood up and left.

Because of the thick fog of chalk dust, no one noticed. Not even Binns...

At total random as they ran down the hall, Sirius pointed his wand at James and said something that was impossible for anyone else to hear.

"Por que no hacemos esto a Snape?" James asked, looking shocked at himsef as soon as he opened his mouth.

Sirius collapsed in hysterical laughter and had to be dragged along by Remus and Peter.

"¡oy! ¡Voy a hacerle daño, Sirius!" James yelled. This only caused Sirius to laugh that much harder.

"Can you say 'el de soltero es verde'?"

"¡Sirius! ¡Cuándo salgo de esto, usted tenía la mejor esperanza le he perdonado! ¡Espero que le guste su cabeza dónde es!" James yelled

"No, no, 'el de soltereo es verde'..." Sirius corrected.

James launched himself at Sirius with a strangled cry of '¡Sirius! ¡Espero que usted sepa que esto significa(piensa) la guerra!'

This was too much for Remus and Peter, who both dissolved into fits of hysterical cackles.
Subject: : )


Author:
James
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Date Posted: 19:22:33 05/08/03 Thu

"How are we supposed to continue if we have no notebooks?" Chels cried in desperation.

"Easy," Lily chirped. "If we ignore you completely, then we can continue with our lives, and you can just sit and watch cause you can't do anything about it!"

And with that, the entire sceeen was back at the hogwarts rooftop.
Subject: ha!


Author:
fufu
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Date Posted: 13:19:44 05/08/03 Thu

(this had better work this time)

Lauren, gasping after her near-death experience, gave Chels an amused look. "You know that's just in your imagination, right?"

Chels gasped, as if offended. "N-no. He's my pet! You've all seen him! Remeber fifth grade??"

Marchel gave her an odd glance. Maddi shook her head. "She's in denial," she whispered to Mr. K, who rolled his eyes.

"So..why am I here?" Marchel asked as if finally realizing she wasn't home.

Chels was too mortified to speak, so Tara sidled up and said, "You have to be...Lily's alter-ego." She shot Chels a side-long glance, then looked back at the english teacher.

"We need to get you back with us, LaMilza," Marchel murmered distantly. "Back on the Post...You were one of my best workers..."

A chorus of voices drifted down. "We're all good workers!"

Lauren cocked her head like a small dog. "Wasn't that Alex? And Jason??"

Maddi was in the corner, talking to her ball of fuzz. Lauren then wandered over and asked, "Is that a peice of lint?"

Maddi growled and instinctivly hid the lint ball. No! And even if I had one, I wouldn't tell you, cause it's MINE!"

Lauren backed away, hands in the air. "Ookkk...Jeez, Maddi, I was just...never mind." With a shake of her shaggy brown hair, she was gone...no, she only walked over to pick up Chels' forgotten 'nose' and put it on.

Marchel looked around, decided she really didn't want to be here, and grabbed Mr. K's arm. "How do we get away from these mentally-unstable children??" she demanded.

He gave a groan of frustration. "It's all in the books. But I keep trying to get away and they keep writing me back in!"

Marchel grabbed a book and began to scribble frantically. "If we sneak away, real quiet -like..."

They managed to escape before any of the Marauders or Editors could notice. When they did, it was too late because they had conviently kidnapped all of the notebooks.

"We're trapped!" Tara howled, mostly because she enjoyed sounding like she belonged in The Lost World.

"And I didn't even get my alter-ego!!" Lily yelled, stoming her foot.

(that was nothing against the Patriot Post up there...just in case u was wondering. O, ya, and my social life currently sucks. Call Maddi, she's babysitting. Call Chrissy, she actually comes over, then leaves within two minutes of being at my home...I have to go sulk now...)
Subject: frooble


Author:
Sirius
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Date Posted: 06:40:10 05/08/03 Thu

(Why am I suddenly trying to pass off fuzz as people, CHRISSY?!)

in the end, they decided that Mr. Kopas would be Cara's alter-ego and that Mrs. Marchel would be LIly's alter-ego. Because she had never seen Mrs. Marchel, Lily seemed very happy with this decision on the Mafia's part.

Meanwhile, the Mafia had joyously decided to play a game of ring-around-the-rosie on the roof. It turned into a rather desperate struggle to pull Lauren back up after she tripped and fell screaming, grabbing onto a windowsill, but that was besides the point.

The point was...was...um...you know, I'm not sure.

"Maddi!" Chrissy hissed from the computer next to her. "You're supposed to stick your thoughts in parenthesies to be edited out later!"

"But I don't want to be edited out," she whined.

"A little help here?" Lauren called. All eyes turned to Chelsea moments later, who transformed into the Lord of the Dead and swooped down to save her in bat-form.

"Yaay!" everyone cheered, and in the joy of it all Lily and James exchanged their first kiss.

Chrissy lept at Maddi from the computer terminal next to her, reaching for her throat. "You've ruined my mushy romance setting!" she howled.

"Hey, no thoughts outside of parenthasies!" Maddi warned, jumping up and hiding behind the real Mr. Kopas.

"Now, now, do you need counseling Christine?" he asked, and then looked about the computer lab. "And does Lauren have a disease?"

We all turned to stare at Fufu, who was foaming at the mouth as she read Charmed scripts and Buffy quotes.

"What about us?" James called from the nearest computer screen.

"You're trapped in a fictional world." Maddi told him bluntly. "You're stuck there. We just put ourselves in your world in a pitiful attempt to escape reality."

"So...so it's all...fake?"

"Yes," Maddi told him.

"Nooooooooooooo!" the Marauders screamed. Chels bonked Maddi over the head for crushing their livelyhood and went on to explain that the Marauders were real in the same way her imaginary pet hamster Banbi was.
Subject: ..


Author:
James
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 05:06:10 05/08/03 Thu

The editors zipped back to the human world and began running madly about the place, grabbing random children and pulling them back to the comp lab for critiqing (sp?)

"Fufu! Kailey?" chrissy cried. "ARE YOU MAD!?"

"Ha! What about you?" Lauren scoffed. "Joe? Joe Vicari?"

"My Person beats all!" Chelsea, shoving Mr. Zilki (I no thats not right!) in front of her.

Maddi, staring at the ball of fuzz in her hand, hid her 'person' behind her back.

~~~Meanwhile~~~

James tried to hastily set back-up the romantic roof-top dinner they were having, while Lily was still sulking because she had no alter-ego.
Subject: What? Rose?


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 14:24:14 05/07/03 Wed

(wat?...no, i'm just not romantic in the slightest, so I can't write these scenes and you can...you're special, feel loved Chrissy. You were blessed with the fluffy writing ability!)

Lauren appeared on the rooftop next to the two. She leaned against an invisible wall and said cheerfully, "Well, isn't this sweet? The lovebirds are confessing how they made their gifts!" She leaned forward to better hear the whispered conversation and pointedly ignored the evil glares she got.

Chrissy appeared next to her and grasped her arm. "You can't just ruin my love scene!" she hissed. "Lily and James are making up here, can't you see this will be a setting for their marriage??? And for Harry's birth??"

She orbed them out and James breathed a sigh of relief. "And they're gone again. I always knew I could depend on my alter-ego to get me out of messy jams..."

Lily began to pout. "Why don't I have an alter ego??"

James looked around nervously, suddenly wishing the Editors were back. "Uh, don't worry..I'm sure we can find you one...somewhere..." he tried to console his brooding girlfriend. "Liilte help!" he added under his breath and with a small poof came the Editors, Chels still wearing her bird beak, Chrissy looking annoyed that her "love connection" attempt had yet again failed miserably.

"Can you find Lily an alter-ego?" James begged. "I'm sure you've got someone in you're world, some girl who wouldn't mind keeping her from EATING US ALL ALIVE!! Er..I mean, to give her less reason to be mad at me..."

Maddi nodded thoughtfully. "It must be a good choice tho..."

Lily squealed and hugged a grinning James, who added, "And get one for Cara. I don't want to be on the recieving end of her wrath either..."
Subject: am i too romantic?


Author:
James
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 12:15:13 05/07/03 Wed

"So Lily," James began, leaning forward in the dim candle light, "remember what night this is?

"Do I?" she retorted. Then she smiled. "Of Corse. Today is the 2 1/2 year anniversary of our relationship. I even brought you a gift." She pulled a small package from her cloak.

"Ah," james said, "great minds think alike." He too pulled a small package out.

They both opened them at the same time. Lily's eyes grew wide when she found a thin gold charm braclet with a small diamond hanging from it. James recieved a small gold p[ocket watch that had "Lily & James Forever" engraved on the front in a heart shape.

James looked sheepishly at Lily. "You would not believe how many rocks and string I went through to get that spell right," he told her.

"I had gotten help from Professer McGonagall," she confessed. "I was having a hard time keeping my wand steady enough to write our names in the heart."

(writting this little sequence, I found that I am quite a bit more romantic than I thought. is it because of my middle name?)
Subject: hey!


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 17:37:28 05/06/03 Tue

(wadya mean, "does lauren get it", of course Lauren gets it! Thinks its a mushy, fluffy little subplot, but I get it just fine! or did u mean to yell @ the very cunfuzzled Chels?)

Meanwhile...(because the Fufu can only write certain types of lovey fanfics...such as Will/Xand,Piper/Leo, Ani/Padme...Matt/Sora...Hermione/Ron...and other such fun topics....)

Maddi was fruitlessly searching for Chels, who had mysteriously gone away yet again. The other Editors found this to be highly entertaining as they all knew where the other girl was hiding, and they were refusing to tell Madison.

She thought she heard an odd flapping noise coming from off-screen (because Tara was still filming her) and went towards it. Before she could throw open the curtain that had magically appeared, Chels burst out from behind it wearing wings and grinning uder the interesting multicolored tucan's nose that was strapped to her face.

"Follow your nose!" she screeched again (disclaimer: yes, i stole maddi's line and she got it from Kelloggs...I'd hope...don't sue...or beat me up...).

She attacked Maddi, who leapt back in fright. "Ag! She's going through another fit!"

*****On the roof*****(because Lauren's going to attempt this...ready? *deep breath*)

James was grinning like some kind of moron and Lily was looking around in some kind of amazement...(and yes im aware I used "some kind of" twic ein one sentence.....dontcha luv paraenthesies???)

Remus conutinued to direct the invisible orquestra with one hand, grinning over his shoulder at Sirius, who was smirking at the couple. Peter stumbled over, face blue from the way his bowtie cut off his air supply. Sirius continued to grin, noting the discomfort and mentally patting himself on the back for successfully jinxing the thing so it would continue to strangle poor Peter all night long.

"May I...serve you??" Peter choked out, trying to suck in some air.

Lily looked at him oddly, but James glared at him. "We would...rather some privacy," he said, off-handedly shoving the choking boy off the roof.

Peter screamed as he fell, landing atop a very very large Blast-Ended Skrewt that broke his fall.

Sensing that their persons (people?) were in danger, Lupin and Siruis jumped for the brooms they had stashed away and leapt away from the others so the couple could have some "them-time".

(see? told ya i couldnt write those....its up to anyone else...)
Subject: huh


Author:
James
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 15:09:05 05/06/03 Tue

(ok, does lauren get it now? *WINK WINK* they were planning a romantic thingy to "patch up the Lily/James relationship, so I just did that because it sounded stupid enough for the marauders to come up with.)
Subject: ...... mushy.....


Author:
James
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 15:06:41 05/06/03 Tue

"Oh!" Sirius cried running up, "but there are ALOT of books, so Lily's going to need to come too!"

"Ugh. OK," James said, pulling Lily up onto the broom.

When they reached the roof, the couple found, not a pile of books, but a candle lit dinner with Remus conducing an enchanted band playing romantic music and Peter playing the waiter with a tray.
Subject: yakljdkl


Author:
Peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 04:07:19 05/06/03 Tue

(what in the world do books have to do with anything? and how did they get up there?)

"What? My books? On the roof? How?" Lily inquired.
Sirius shifted uneasily from side to side, looking at the ground, "Well...um...erm."
"Sirius! How could you! We're your friends! Now we have to go and get James to fly up to the roof. May i mention that he could easily get killed while falling off the roof." Lily yelled.
Instantly seeing another moment for him to gain more brownie points, James stood up, "I MUST go and retrieve your books, Lily!" (can u tell im having serious dialogue problems?)A few moments later they were out on the lawn and James was preparing to take off.
Lily grabbed onto his arm, "Please do be careful James, those books cost me a fortune."
"Oh...um...ok." James muttered.
Subject: dvc


Author:
James
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 08:03:05 05/05/03 Mon

Chelsea and Chrissy brook into a fast-paced political debate, while Tara and Lauren and Maddi contimplated on why the exercisim didn't work.

**********************

James sat silently in the commonroom, Lily cuddled close to him, staring into the blazing fire.

"When did you say they'll be here?" Lily asked him quietly

"Right...... now," James said as Sirius burst into the common room.

"James! Lily! Professer Mc. Gonagal just told me that she found your books up on the roof, by the astronomy tower, but the door to the place is locked, so you'll have to fly there to get it." Sirius gasped, running back out.
Subject: uh, stop the violence?


Author:
Sirius
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 06:06:37 05/05/03 Mon

At total random, there was a tiny audible snap. Maddi screamed wildly and put out the flames with her face.

The rest of the Muffins stared at her, very confused. Chelsea fell over, turning out to be no more than a cardboard cut out.

"Where's the real Chels?" Fufu asked, but it was too late. The rest of the people on the stage also fell over.

"Follow your nose, wherever it goes!" someone shouted off stage.

*****

"Okay, James is having girl problems." Sirius began. The Marauders were sitting under the Grand Staircase in a broom closet. "We need to set him and lily up."

"Let's call it 'Operation Muskrat'!" Remus burst out. Of course, that's what they had to call it.

James stuck his head in, grinning. "Uh, hi, Lily and I have made up. There's no need for this."

"Yes there is!" Sirius shouted, violently attacking him with a bucket. "Be gone, spawn of evil!"

"Um-kay..." James muttered, leaving.

The silence that followed was broken only by an amused 'pook pook pook', after which Cara slugged Remus.
Subject: Ag! Funess!


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 05:54:03 05/05/03 Mon

(hey, 4 all u who care bout x-men out there, didja know that sarah michelle gellar was originally considered for the role of Rogue? Anna Paquin ended up playing her of course, but I found that amusing..)

Lauren merrily handed her flamethrower to Maddi, which probably wasn't a very good idea. She began to pour holy water on Martha's head and the demonic woman growled something about "messing up my perfect hair".

Lauren ignored this, and draped a rosary around the woman's neck. Martha looke down with a very confused, "What?" and Chelsea quickly placed a peice of duct tape over her mouth.

Lauren then beckoned Maddi forward, and the girl hit a button on her flamethrower. Martha began to scream hsyterically around her gag, eventually swallowing the nasty thing (chels, Anne Frank? lol) and yelling outright for help, apparently believing that the Shrub would come to her aid.

Alas, the evil prez was having a problem of his own in the form of a giant rabid pretzel and could do nothing to rescue the demon of a T.V. hostess.
Subject: ogga booga


Author:
Sirius
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 05:43:54 05/05/03 Mon

The Marauders left for Hogwarts while the Mafia stayed behind to deal with the whimpering Shrub and the Martha stage.

"So, what do we do now?" Cara asked, skipping.

"Um...make up with Lily?" Sirius suggested, giving James a pointed stare.

"Are you insinuating something?" James asked suspiciously.

"yes..." the other Marauders said together.

"Look, there, she's leaving Charms. Go, Prongs, go!"

James skipped off to patch up his relationship with his destined wife.

***** (meanwhile...)

Maddi, Chels, Tara, and Chrissy were wearing black robes and standing in a circle around a woman tied to a fence post. As the camera zooms in, we see it's Martha/James' mother.

Lauren walks in, carrying her bag of excersist goodies and a flamethrower.

"You must be purified..."
Subject: ag! scaryness!


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 05:18:30 05/05/03 Mon

"Ah! No, James!" Sirius yelled. "Why didn't you tell us this monstrosity was your maternal figure??"

"Because..I was ashamed!" James hung his head as the two other Mauraders began to hum a dark little chant that was both sad and angry. Sirius' eyes flashed angrilly.

"You should've told us, James, come on! We would've been on your side, you know we would've! Hiding is painful!!!!"

"I..I'm sorry!!!" James shrieked and Chrissy wiped a tear from her eye. "I know I shouldn't have kept it from you, but what could I do? She's been horrible to me, HORRIBLE!"

There was silence in which Lauren pulled out a tiny fiddle and began to play it softly.. Then Martha/James' mom gave her son a glare.

"James! What have I told you about pouring out your soul on camera??"

He hung his head, the music and humming gone. "Never do it unless Barbra Walters is the one interviewing..."
Subject: boo!


Author:
Sirius
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 05:10:47 05/05/03 Mon

As the Muffin Mafia writhed in horror, the Marauders seriously regretted ever pitting themselves against their alter-egos, and the Shrub plotted a world-conquest, Martha got out cookie ingrediants.

Maddi elbowed Chels and whispered something. The Fufu went prarie dog and stuck her head in the middle of them, whispering along. Chrissy also joined in their plotting.

Moments later, the Mafia went missing. The Marauders, who were too horrified at the simplistic baking instructions, didn't notice their disapearence.

Just as Martha was begenning to mix the ingrediants (that she had grown herself), Maddi Fufu Chels and Chrissy walked onto the kitchen set, clad in cooking aprons, kackis, and pastel t-shirts.

"We'll take it from here, ma'am." Chels said.

Tara ran in behind them, still in jeans. "Don't add the chocolate chips!" she cried, just as Martha poured them in.

"The bishop!" Maddi and Chels choroused.

"We wuz, too late." Tara said, mouth disfiguring itself of its own accord. "The informant kicked the bucket."

Martha exploded at total random. Beneath the cheery smile was none other than...

"Mother!" James exclaimed, jumping up in the audiance. "I thought you were dead!"

"Well, that's what I told you. I didn't want to bother you or your father with my life-long dream to hoast my own sit-com about home living, so I faked my own death. I must admit, it worked quite well..."
Subject: dsfslk


Author:
Chels Peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 04:06:09 05/05/03 Mon

"Enough! She dies!" Shrub yelled, "I've always wanted to say that..."
Shrub smiled giddily as the Marauders and Muffin Mafia were chained to chairs. They were facing a set piece of a kitchen.
Chels let out a wimper and Lauren just looked over and nodded in agreement.
"No! Please! Anything but this! Give us fufu babble, but not this." Maddi cried.
"No, im sorry. You're grown an immunity to fufu babble and therefor this is much more benificial.
"Please just--"
"Shhhh, the show's about to start." Shrub shushes. And the lights go out in the main studio and the stage lights go on over the set piece.
Martha comes walking out, "Good morning, and welcome to Martha Stuart living."
The auto-clapper machine starts to clap and cheer and the maruaders/editors start rithing in their seats.
Subject: oopsie...


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 14:01:55 05/04/03 Sun

"I meant Lesotho," Lauren amended as Chelsea gave her a very odd look. "Lithuania is in Europe..."

"You did a report on it!" Chels cried. "How did you forget??"

"Because...the monkeys removed my brain last summer and never returned it!"
Subject: Ag! Not again!


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 13:56:37 05/04/03 Sun

"NO!!!!! Not him again!!" Lauren shrieked, but she was secretly very glad that the topic had switche donce again because she got oddly paranoid when the topic didn't change often enough.

Lupin's mouth worked frantically. "Yes, he's back...and he's brought.....he's brought....MARTHA STEWART WITH HIM!!!"

"ARGGGG!!!!!NO!!!!!NOT HER!!!!!!" everyne else screamed, but the werewolf spoke the truth and in walzed the psycho president and the evil T.V. lady-who-tells-people-how-to-do-stuff.

"Welcome to my newest in a line of hostile takeovers!" Shrub announced.

Maddi scowled. "Hey, we're the ones doing the taking-over-of, bub. So you can go take over some African country, cause we don't want you here!"

Lauren stuck her head in and said, "Yeah, take over Lithuania," a statement to which both the Fufu and the Chels cried, "Indiana Jones!"

The Mauraders started yelling too, saying stuff like: "Yes! We'd much rather have these American lunitics run our lives than you!" and "We don't need your brighten-your-house tips anyway!" and "Indiana Jones?? Where??"
Subject: oo-ee-oo-ah-ah


Author:
James
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 10:19:23 05/04/03 Sun

(i stuck the fun wizard hat on here! i thought it was cool. and how did this go from the marauders to other strange things concerning us? i find it odd, but every time i try to get back on the ,main topic, you switch it! Gr!)

Chels glared at Lauren, who was ready to just leave.

"I think your lying," she said.

"Am not!" Lauren cried.

"Are too!"

"No!"

"Yes!"

"No!"

"Yes!"

"Nuh-uh."

"Uh-huh."

"Nuh-uh!"

"Uh-huh!"

"Uh-huh!"

"Nuh-uh... hey wait a sec!"

Lauren took off with Chels hot on her heels. Maddi and Chrissy chased after them, weaving in and out of... redwood trees?

"Wait. How'd we get here?" asked Maddi, puzzled. Lauren and Chels started running back towards Chrissy and Maddi, when they plowed right over... the Marauders!

"Gahh!" cried Lauren in shock. "Why are you here?"

"Well," began James, "When you guys left, you once again forgot your notebook."

Sirius cut in. "Snape managed to get ahold of it, and he began to write in..." he gulped, "the Sh... the shr..."

"Whats wrong?" asked Maddi.

"Well, you see," Sirius said, "We don't like sayin his name."

"Can't you write it?" Chels asked.

"Nah, can't spell it," Sirius said with a sigh. "Oh, all right..." he leaned over and hissed, "Shrub."

(can you tell I've been re-reading the books lately?)
Subject: Lizards!


Author:
Peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 08:24:26 05/04/03 Sun

After hours of this torturous and tedious process lauren is exausted and lies swetting and panting on the black leather bed/chair/thing. She breaths heavily, trying to stop the effects of the truth syrum.
Maddi is in the large black swirly desk chair that, when turned away as she is now, hides her from LAuren's view. The blinds are partialy open and cast dark shadows and orange afternoon light across the room.
"Now i'll ask you once again, who is your accomplis in Buenos Ares?" Maddi swirls around and glares at Lauren.
Lauren flintches and tries to hold back the truth. Finally she manages to say, "I've ne-never been to Buenos Ares."
Maddi smacks her hand on the desk, "You lie! Chelsea, more truth syrum!"
Chels reluctantly comes closer to lauren with a large jug of truth syrum.
"Nooo! Anything but that!" Lauren howls.
Maddi holds up a hand to stop chels, "Then confess!"
"I said i've never been there!"
"Yes, but your butt has!"
"Excuse me?"
"The tatoo of a leopard on your butt! I've only seen one other in my life and that was on a tango dancer from Buenos Ares."
"That's unjustified. And how did you know i have a tatoo of a leopard from Buenos Ares?"
"Ha! So you admit that you have been there!"
"No, the tatoo artist was from Buenos Ares."
"Is that so? Then what was his name?"
"Hector."
"And did this 'hector' have a last name or any distinguishing features?"
"He didn't tell me his last name, but he did have a tatoo of Jesus on the crusifix down the middle of his face..."
"Are you so sure?"
"Yes!"

(I rented 'The Life of Brian' it was funny. But it did have nudity ((yucky!)) and profan phrases.)
Subject: Ack! *choke choke*


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 15:23:31 05/03/03 Sat

(arg!)

Lauren clamped a hand over her own maouth. "NO! I didn't mean that!"

"Well, since that was a truth serum, obviously, you did..."

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!" Lauren looked furiously at Chels. "This is all your fault!"

"Nope, it was you and that lizard!"

Maddi cut in. "Okay,next question....why are your eyes blue?"

"They're not!"

Maddi snapped her fingers and Chels poured more of the beaker-full down the Fufu's throat. The helpless animal, er, Editor, was forced to say, "Because of an odd gene transplant."

(this is like those all-that commercials where the voiced says stuff thats totally off...interesting...any1 no wat im taklkin about?)
Subject: trees


Author:
Peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 15:14:38 05/03/03 Sat

"Ok, i confess i really love how skirts feel! And i love to skip and frollic in the medows with all of our woodland friends!" Lauren confessed. Maddi jotted this outburst down briskly before lauren had a chance to say more.
"I've been know to swollow birds whole."
"How picular..."
Subject: ag! there's a wizard hat 4 a cursor..


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 13:40:23 05/03/03 Sat

(since when am i an endangered species??)

The Fufu contintues to giggle hysterically. "I thought Colleen's nickname was cow," she laughed, then went still. "Um, I mean...cluck...quack...neigh.."

But her mistake had already been noticed and Maddi yelled, "Ladies and wizards, she's got a problem!"

Lauren tried to run, but the others quickly grabbed her and forced her onto a psychiatrist's couch, then tied her to it.

"We will figure out what your problem is!" Maddi announced, cheerfully donning a dorky-looking bowtie and picking up a pad and pencil. "Now,tell us about your childhood."

Lauren rolled her eyes and locked her jaw and Maddi growled.

"Don't make us get out the truth potion."

But Lauren wouldn't talk, so Maddi screeched, "Verita Serum, stat!" and Chrissy and Chels ran oun-screen with a beaker full of a dubious looking liquid. They pried a reluctant Lauren's mouth open and dumped in the contents before continuing the questionaire...

(this wizard hat thingy is distracting..where'd it come from?)
Subject: A documentury!


Author:
peter/Chels
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 19:09:43 05/02/03 Fri

(aw, i know what cyclops does. Remember i created the goggle theory!)

The scene changes to a nature documentury. We see Maddi, Chrissy and Chels croached behind a bush. From our bush-view we can also see a lone Fufu in a clearing.
Maddi, acting as a temporary narrator, babbles the monologue, "We now can see one of a dying out race of Fufiusgenerousalioso, or Fufu. See how her brown-colored crest feathers resemble hair? Though little is known about this rare specie it can be said that her brown plumage is used as a sort of solar panel system to conduct heat."
CHrissy continued, "The Fufu reacts with her environement cautiously at first. SHe will first be seen sniffing trees carefully, telling what type of tree sprite lives in it. If she finds a favorable one she'll start to babble about random entertaining movies or series. These include: Buffy, Charmed, X-men, Spiderman, Green Lantern, Superman..."
"The list goes on and on." Chels muttered.
"We now are witnessing a rare interactment with a human." Maddi announces as Chels is shoved into the camera's view.
"How come i have to be the human?" Chels hisses angrily at the 'hidden' Maddi and chrissy.
"Because you speak Fufu and plus, we're the narrators." Chrissy whispered back. Chels reluctantly went forward and petted Fufu's head.
"What are you doing?" Fufu asked, shooting Chels an odd look.
"This specimin exibits(sp? I know there's and H in there somewhere) anger with the human's weird greeting." Chrissy mutters into her microphone.
"Um...stroaking your head crests, erm, hair?" Chels offered uncomfortably.
"Ok...what?"
"Um...nothing."
Lauren/Fufu glanced away before noticing the packet of juicefruit in Chels' pocket, "Mmmmm! Is that Juice Fruit???"
Chels looks down at pocket, "Yes, yes i believe it is."
Maddi narrates, "The Fufu notices food and asks for some politely."
"Give me the fricken gum! It's only one piece! Just give it!" Fufu yells as the tug at the gum packet.
"Noooo! Never it's mine!" chels protests, but it's too late, lauren has the gum. Chels sinks to her knees in dispair.
"No! Don't feed the fufu!!!" Chrissy exclaims, jumping out from behind the bush, blowing their cover. fufu looks at her like a cow looks at an oncomming train before scurrying off into the forest.
Maddi and Chrissy storm out into the clearing and glare at Chels.
"What have we told you about modern food products poluting the Fufu's diet?" Maddi growled angrily.
"Eat them first?"
"NO! Never give them food!"
"Sorry? It was an accident. Honest, it was."
"There's no excuse!"
Maddi glances at the camera, "Are we still filming?"
Tara grins behind the camera and nods a 'mmmhmm'.
"Oh god! Now our show is ruined! This was live!" Chrissy yells while beating CHels over the head with a safari hat.
"Ow! I...ow! Didn't...ow! Mean to...OW!"
"Where are we going to find another rare animal?" Maddi thought aloud. Both Maddi's and Chrissy's eyes landed on Chels at the same time and grinned.
A few moments later you see Chels dressed up like one of the 5 guys from Monty Python's 1st Flying Circus.
"This is imbarrising." Chels complained.
"Shut up, you're the one who scared the fufu away, so you need to replace her."
"Just fallow the script, don't complain any more."
"Oh, alright..." chels gets down on her hands and knees grumbling about something.
"3, 2, 1 annnnnnnnd action!" Tara yells from offscreen. Chels begins to moo. And lauren is heard laughing at her from the cover of the forest.
Subject: oo, good movie, good movie, good movie..


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 18:28:18 05/02/03 Fri

"You are Rogue!" Lauren yelled. "You imprint, stealing other people's personality traits, life-force, and, in the case of mutants, powers for a short amount of time! Prolonged contact can result in comas, paralyisis and eventual death!"

There was a brief silence, broken when Mr. K muttered, "Aren't I supposed to be the educator?"

Lauren ignored him and continued, "Chelsea is Cyclops, with optic beams that shoot from her eyes and could be fatal to anyone or anything she looks at unless contained by a special type of ruby quarz. Maddi, being Nightcrawler, is extremely athletic and agile and can teleport from place to place. Tara, or Storm, has control of wind, water, and other forms of weather. I, being the Wolverine, have a healing power that, coupled with my adamantium-laced bones, make me virtually indestructable. That's where I got my claws, when William Stryker performed an operation that would have been lethal if not for my 'gifts'."

"We all know this," Maddi muttered, but Lauren, on a roll, continued to ignore her.

"There's also Iceman, the guy with power over ice, Pyro, a dude who controls, but doesn't create, fire. Magneto, who controls metal, Jean Gray, who is telekinetic and a telepath. Prof. X is also a telepath, the Beast is blue and fuzzy and super-smart, Toad is..toad-like, Sabertooth has animal instincts and senses, Mystique can morph into or take on the seperate traits of any living being, person or mutant. Gambit is French, melts things, likes the ladies, bugs me..."

"He's the card-guy!" Chelsea interrupted helpfully. "And he's cool!"

"...Fufu," Maddi began quietly. "You need therapy."

"And Spiderman can swing from webs, originally not of his body's creation, can climb walls, is superstrong, has a spider sense. Batman is not techinically a super-hero at all, the Flash is super-fast, Superman is incredably strong, can see through walls, is fast, can fly, Green Lantern has an amusing ring with which he can create barriers and shoot stuff...Daredevil's got enhanced senses that come with him being blind, Blade's half-vampire, Silver Surfer's...just plain weird...Wonder Woman's got a fun lasso of justice...or truth, or something..."

Maddi motioned as if speaking into a tape recorder. "When on a roll, the Fufu will continue to rant until stopped...which could take a while."

Lauren was changing tack again. "And the Charmed Ones are witches with the powers to stop time, see the future, move things witht heir minds, the Slayer is super-strong, fast, has a heightened healing power, can sense evil, and usually dies early in life. Souled vampires have conciences and feel horribly for all the wrongs they commited.."

"Do you have a consience??" Maddi demanded from her place on the celing. "Do you feel horribly for all you hav commited by dragging us into this twisted sub-plot??"

Lauren thought for a moment, then grinned twistedly. "Nope. Not until I drag in random classmates will I feel bad...which won't be for a while...maybe." *evil cackle*

(ok, that was scary. can u tell ive been on a super-hero kick ever since that movie?? good movie, go see it, good movie, go see it!!)
Subject: chaos


Author:
James who has been introduced to the wonderful world of X-men!!!!
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 17:20:26 05/02/03 Fri

Chrissy, at that moment, made the horrible mistake of grabbing Lauren's bare arm. Lauren squealed out in pain, and, not knowing what she was doing, backed away.

"What's up, Fufu?" she asked in a very clueless sort of way.

"You Muffin brain!" cried Chels. "Do you know nothing of you power?"

"No, sorry," Chrissy said, shrugging and walking in the direction of James, who flead in fright.
Subject: gr, arg...


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 06:02:18 05/02/03 Fri

"Ahh!" Lauren yelped. "Why is Chrissy spouting flames? She's Rogue, Rogue doesn't *usually* breathe fire!! And why is my alter-ego suddenly dressed like Thor??"

Maddi only grinned evilly, teleporting from place to place so Fufu couldn't catch her. The enraged teen-turned-mutant popped her claws momentarily, then retracted them and grabbed a notebook, muttering, "Two can play at that scary game, tow can always play," as she scribbled.
Subject: cirken


Author:
Maddi
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 05:13:36 05/02/03 Fri

Maddi, the paranoid nightcrawler, scaled up the wall, staring at her three fingers and toes (twelve collectively). She then marveled at her tail, whacking Fufu upside the head with it.

Chels, not knowing enough about her character, began to life her red visor. Maddi and Fufu tackled her and prevented her from lifting the visor, screaming "you'll kill us all!"

Chrissy, however, breathed flames into the air. Mr Kopas quickly wheeled out of the way, looking thankful that he no longer had hair to set fire to.

"Hey, why am I handicapped?" he asked, clearly puzzled.

At that moment, two figures zoomed through the common room and up the stairs. Remus Lupin ran into the room wearing red underwear and a black spotted outfit with a cape and dragging along an incredably heavy hammer-type-thingy.

"What happened to you?" Fufu demanded. "I would never so harm my alter-ego!"

"Too late..."
Subject: fun quote


Author:
James
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 18:49:51 05/01/03 Thu

Chrissy, not knowing what power she has exactly, sat back and howled "Is there anyone I can trust?"

Tara perked at this past quote and shouted "The Milkey Way!" They began rolling on the floor with laughter.
Subject: um...


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 17:59:27 05/01/03 Thu

(i think i have a problem...i can never just stay on one entertaining topic for long can I??...o well, that one word was "protruded" it came out "potruded" and that wasn't right, so...there, now I can rest easy....no I can't, but we can pretend...and no math class tomorrow! say it with me now: no math!!)
Subject: o, and its up to me to save us...


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 17:56:30 05/01/03 Thu

"I've got it!" Lauren announced, reaching down with the hand that was no longer attached to her arm and scribbling in the notebook. Everyone else sighed as their muscules unfroze, then yelled in horror as they realized who exactly had just written in the sacred notebook of manifest destiny..er...

"NOOOOOO!" they all yelled, but it was too late. They began to change and within seconds, this is what they looked like:

Chrissy's hair had a white streak in it and she gave a moan of anger as she realized she had been transformed into the Rogue.

Tara's hair was pure white and she suddenly bore a striking resemblance to Halle Berry: she was Storm.

Chelsea wore a visor thingy that glowed bright red, which she seemed to find amusing. "I think I'm Cyclops...."

Maddi had a tail and was blue. She screamed, "And who am I supposed to be??"

To which Lauren answered calmly, "Nightcrawler." Her hair stuck up like it was badly gelled and claws potruded from between her knuckles.

Mr. Kopas was bald and sat in a wheelchair. Lauren grinned.

"And you're Professor X!"

"Arg!!" Maddi yelled. "Why, Fufu, why? Why must you continue to stray from the place which we were meant to invade??"

"It's fun...and I'm Wolverine!" Lauren replied, popping her claws out and slicing through a tangle of wires. When Chrissy growled, she continued cheerfully. "Oops, didja need those?"

Lauren grinned cheerfully and dove for the notebook aagin, exclaiming, "I have an idea!"

Maddi tried to intercept the crazed little monkey, but failed and a moment later they all heard Peter's confused voice drift up from below: "Sirius? Why are there webs coming from your wrist?"

"Gah! No! No more, you cannot just change us into random superheros!" Maddi cried, but everyone else was distracted by their fun new powers. Chels punched a hole through a pillar with her eyes and she laughed hsyterically. After a while, even Maddi got into it, merrily teleporting form place to place.

(that was in tribute to tommorrow people, so that even those who rn't going can be in on the fun...sort of. *big grin* Nobody eat me, please...)
Subject: Write!


Author:
Chels
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Date Posted: 16:38:54 05/01/03 Thu

For hours the Muffin Mafia (aka the editors) stood in their most uncomfortable positions muttering swear words powered by frustration under their breath. Mr. Kopas was cursing angrily. Even the hedgehog wanted to leave.
"Oh great Maddi, memorizer of all things Potter, can your infinate wisdom help us in this time of so desperate need? Hurry! Rememeber the counter spell!" Chels yelled in her New york accent.
"i-I" maddi stammered.
"You what?" Lauren yelled.
"I can't remember it!" Maddi confessed.
"Nooooooooooooo!" the others howled parchaily from their cramped joints, but mostly because Maddi didn't know the counter spell.
Hours ticked by and the Muffin Mafia and the 800-yard hedgehog (it must have been a bad day) stood frozen. They had long sinse given up hope of ever moving againg. Chrissy flintched her foot, the only moveble part on her body, towards the fallen notebook.
"I...can...almost...reach...it." Chrissy said slowly as she strained to grasp it with her suddenly bare foot.
The others purked up and started chanting for her, "Chrissy, chrissy!"
"I...think...i...got...it! Yes!"
"Hurry, write with your toes!" Mr. Kopas yelled.
"But, but."
"But what?"
"I can't write with my toes!"
A colective gasp was heard from all, even the hedgehog.
"To think, the irony of it all. The one who can reach the notebook is the same one who is unable to write with her foot!"
"Sorry." Chrissy muttered sadly.
'How bout u break the pen and dip your foot in the ink and write that way!" Chels offered. the others just shook their heads in disgust of her stupidity.
Subject: how did this all start?


Author:
James
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 16:21:19 05/01/03 Thu

Chrissy cowered in a corner as far from Mr. K as possible!

"No! I refuse to be commited! I won't go!" she shouted.

It just so happened that Lily and Cara marched into the commonroom, followed by the marauders. Cara looked around at the maham and cried out "THIS IS REDICULOUS!"

Lily pulled out her wand and shouted out "*that spell that binds people*" just as Maddi and lauren began a tug-o-war over the notebook. She walked over, grabbed the notebook, and scribbled something in it.

Just as she was adding the last period, a bishop followed by three shaded goons burst in. The bishop pointed his staff at Lily and shouted "Don't add that period!"

Ignoring the bishop, Lily finished the sentence and all the mess that the marauders had created disappeared. "Drat! Too late!" the Bishop said, snapping his fingers and racing out the door.

"No need to worry now, everyone," James said, relieved. "It's all over. It's just a memory." *cough* *chamber of secrets* *cough* "James, that was really REALLY corney," said Sirius, turning and leaving for the Great Hall. The rest of the marauders followed, the girls the last to leave.

"Wait!" called out the editors voices. "Lily, wait!"

"What?" cried out Lily, very annoyed.

"You forgot to un-bind us!" Maddi shrieked.

Lily gave a nasty grin at the celling. "Oppsy," she said gleefully, and skipped out after the other marauders.

*good chapter break... hehe*
Subject: Popcorn


Author:
Peter (where is he?)
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Date Posted: 16:02:23 05/01/03 Thu

"Don't try, it doesn't work. Or else she'd be dust long ago." Tara confessed. Angel and Buffy got off of lauren dissapointed.
"Hey, that's not fair!" Lauren complained, apparently she wanted to be slain.
Suddenly Maddi emerged from behind a lamp shade (the type that cover the lightbulb as to not burn out our retinas when we look at the lamp) and stalked over to Lauren.
"What is this? Buffy and Charmed characters again?" Maddi boomed.
"And Angel." Lauren added.
"Whoever! I don't know how many times i've told you about this..."
"I think i should comit you all!" Mr. Kopas announced.
"Even me?" Chels wimpered.
"Yeah...especailly you. I thought you were just weird, not phsyco..."
Subject: arg! wat is this??


Author:
fufu
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Date Posted: 05:06:59 05/01/03 Thu

"What is going on??" Lauren howled in frusteration. Tara stuck her head in on the seen and grinned cheerily.

"It's another one of their scary obsessions...."

"Well, two can play at that game!" Lauren announced. She began to scribble frantically, grinning because she knew Maddi would throttle her. Seconds later, the Charmed, Buffy and Star Wars characters appeared.

Anakin Skywalker looked about and pulled out his lightsaber, yelling, "I will be the most POWERFUL Jedi ever!!!!!!"

His wife, Padme, patted his arm. "It's okay, sweetie, we all know about your problems..."

"MORE POWER!!" he yelled.

Piper gave him an odd look. "Are you insane?"

"He is," Padme volunteered quietly. "But don't tell him I said that, or he'll kill me."

"He'll kill you anyway!" Lauren announced happily. Padme glared.

"Was I speaking to you??"

Buffy and Angel grinned at each other and yelled, "Slaying op!" before leaping upon Lauren and attempting to drive a stake through her heart.

She wriggled away. "Hey! Do I look like a vampire to you??"

Buffy nodded sloemnly. "Wiht those shades, yes..."
Subject: vliujbfgvKN


Author:
sIRIUS
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 04:57:06 05/01/03 Thu

Maddi, clad in her super-cool spy outfit, snapped her fingers just fine.

"Alfreado, bring me a notebook and a blue ink pen." she commanded.

The little dish of spaghetti sauce hurried to comply.

Chels, Chrissy, Fufu, and Mr. Kopas stared at Maddi strangely.

"Did she just order a dish of sauce to do her bidding?" Chrissy whispered to Chels, who nodded sadly, removing her shades (like the window).

"Is she mentally stable?" Mr. Kopas asked.

"We've always doubted that..." Fufu muttered.

"Look who's talkin'" Chels replied in her scary New York accent.

Maddi began to skip about the room, demanding people to give her their lunch...no, prank money.

Sirius held out several galleons.

"I can't take any from you, you're my alter-ego." Maddi told him.

"What's that supposed to mean?!" Sirius called.

At that moment, a giant hedgehog fell through the ceiling. Tara, Chels, Chrissy, and Maddi all squealed and dove for cover.

Several men wearing tall black boots shuffled out onto the screen and repeated an illegable message, with the words 'an apology' in the background.

Before they could announce their next sketch, a ture gangster burst through the door.

From under several armchairs, Maddi, Chrissy, Tara, and Chels chorused 'The Biship'!

A scary black and white intro flashed across the screen, frighteningly similar to an ancient Bond opening.
Subject: o pleze


Author:
Jamers
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Date Posted: 18:30:13 04/30/03 Wed

Chrissy galred at Chels' lack of respect for the wizarding world. Looking back at the portrait, she said "Wattlebird." The Fat Lady gave a relieved sigh and swung open.

Chels glanced at Chrissy. "They should learn to respect us," she stated as they stepped through the portrait.

Chrissy ingnored the comment at looked strait forward. "I don't think that We should have left James sleeping like that in the classroom. He seemed like he was having a very disturbing dream. He kept muttering 'I'm not gay...'" She turned to see Maddi poke at a wizarding chess board.
Subject: >:) The Muffin Mafia


Author:
Peter? Chels? Are you my mother?
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 18:00:25 04/30/03 Wed

Suddenly Maddi and Chels burst through the cell--erm--classroom *cough* door wearing 'shades'(sunglasses, not decorative window coverings). They were fallowed by tough looking italian guys who had their hair gelled up and back and stuff, their muscles glistened with sweat from some odd activity. 'Shades' (once again not window coverings) balanced on their tan skin. Maddi and Chels, looking very short amongst these tall muscular men, stood menicingly.
Maddi snapped her fingers, "Johnny, get these girls outfitted."
And two of the muscle-men set to work taking Lauren and Chrissy's measurements and handing them cewl 'shades' (They're still not window coverings)to put on.
Lauren grabbed the sunglasses (or 'shades') eagerly and put them on, "Fun! Now i'm like a vampire!"
Chels, Maddi, and their band of interesting muscleguys looked at Lauren as if to say, 'i know you're mental health isn't terribly stable, but try to hide it'. Lauren shrank away behind Mr. Kopas.
Chels attempted to snap her fingers but it didn't snap, "Adolfo! Get him so-"
"You didn't snap, boss"
"What?!? Of coarse i snapped. Didn't i snap, Maddi?"
"Nope..." Maddi muttered.
"Okay, i'll snap again." trys again to snap, but it doesn't work, "Darn! My hands are all slippery from playing with your jell..."
"Here, i'll snap for you, boss." another guy offered.
"Thank you, Pete, how sweet." Chels replied, "Ok, ready? One, two, three, SNAP!"
Pete snapped his fingers.
"There. Now, Adolfo, get Mr. Kopas outfitted too!" Chels barked.
Once everyone was 'outfitted' in their specaily tailored black overcoats, assorted colored silky dark colored shirt, shiny spit-polished shoes, and spiffy jet-black pants, they strutted out of the darkened classroom--erm--cell--erm---whatever...
As they walked down the hallway towards the Griffindor(sp) common room small wan children darted out of their way or else were shuvved into 'circular files' (wastebaskets, trash cans, whatever u call em). Finally the mob of black-clothed people, headed by the Editors, reached the portrait of the fat lady.
The fat lady gave them an odd look before asking, "Password please."
Maddi snapped her finger and another guy in their mob said, "Open up."
The fat lady frowned, "i'm sorry, that's incorrect."
"No, ya don't understand, lady. We weren't askin' ya permition to enter, we were tellin' ya. So open up!" Adolfo yelled.
The Fat lady quivered a bit at the intensity of Adolfo's order.
"He said open up!" Mr. Kopas hollard. The girls turned to him in surprise, they didn't know that his secret fantisy had alway been to be part of a mob/group.
"Ya." Pete added.
"I'm sorry i cant-"the fat lady started to protest but was cut off.
"Do you know who we are?" Chels inquired, looking around at her fellow editors, "Does she you who she's messin with."
Chels had suddenly adopted a new york accent, "You're messin' with the Muffin Mafia!"
THe words bounced off the hallways (as many words do) and somewhere in the recesses of the cooridoors a small dormitory mouse collapsed of heart failure *squeak*.
Subject: i had no time...


Author:
fufu
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Date Posted: 18:10:22 04/29/03 Tue

"Arg!" Lauren clutched her head and rocked in the corner of the headmaster's office. "Maddi and Chelsea have sick sick minds!! Grr, evilness!!!"

Lupin howled up at them. "Getr id of them once and for all and let us live our lives!!"

And the entire school formed a mob and ran for the Editors. Maddi pulled out a flute and began to play an odd tune and they all calmed. Lauren laughed.

"The Pied Piper, er, Maddi!"
Subject: Um...scarey post...


Author:
Peter
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Date Posted: 12:42:26 04/29/03 Tue

(Awww, poor Mr. K!)

Finally James got Lily to sit down with him so he could fully explain what was going on. They were in the common room sitting in chairs that faced one another.
"Now i know you have alot of questions that you want to ask me. And i'm fully prepared to answer them." James started calmly. He looked at Lily with indifference. To he she could have just been another of his friends, like Sirius or Lupin. Lily found it hard to understand that after all they had been through together he could deny the love that she thought they once had.
The first words out of her mouth where ones that had been circling madly inside her head, "You're gay?"
James swallowed a Burty Bott's Every Flavored Jelly Bean and nearly chocked, he hadn't expected that she would be so blunt and as that question first. But he was prepared, he just wanted to ease into it. James cleared his throat, "Yes..."
His answer hit Lily like a tsunami, but she didn't flinch. She sat still, like a statue, on the old chair. Ever sinse James had confessed his unloyalty to her, her heart had broken. She felt so cold, so empty. It was as if his love was the only thing keeping her together. And now it was gone.
James looked at Lily with a hint of concern. She was as pale as Peeves. Purple bags underneath her eyes hinted that she hadn't slept the previous night and her cheeks were puffy from crying. He wanted so much to make her forget about it. SHe wasn't worth him or the pain he caused her.
"How long have you known?" Lily finally spoke.
"I dont really know. I just...i just..." the words that he had prepared left James now. He couldn't understand what he was doing. Was Bresupletin really his soul mate? How could he know at such an impressionable age as 14 (15?)? The truth was he didn't. But ever sinse he had met Bresupletin he had been filled with a joy that had long-sinse evaded his life.
"You just what?"
"I, i'm at a cross roads in my life. I need change. And i feel that with Bresupletin i can make that change for the better."
"Bresupletin?!?! Is that his name?!?!" Lily exploded.
"Um...yes." James muttered he looked around nerviously, hoping that Sirius would come in and restrain her, "But don't get mad at him. It's me, it's my fault!"
It was then that a small bubble appears at the edge of the screen and you see and adult Lilly and James sitting side by side. You can see that they are married and are very much in love.
"It was a confusing phase in my life..." the future James tried to explain.
"I'm lucky it was...wait no. You're lucky it was only a phase. And you're also lucky that i cared enough to let you back after you realized you weren't gay." the future Lily growled. Apparently this subject still made her angry.
"I was a stupid kid."
"As stupid as they come."
"How was i to know what i was doing wasn't ordained in the stars?"
"You were too stupid."
"Can you please stop that?"
"Stop what?"
"Ridiculing me infront of our viewers."
An adult Sirius (pre-Azkiban) popped up in another bubble on the opposite side of the screen, "Aww, how cute, a lover's quarrel."
Future James blushed, "Shut up..."
"James, we've been married for 3 years, you'd think that you'd grown out of the embarresment stage."

(sorry it's so scarey...)
Subject: iodfugsacn


Author:
Sirius
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 07:09:11 04/29/03 Tue

“Lily-I hate to admit it, but I’ve been cheating on you,” Daniel Kornall admitted to the emerald-eyed Lily Evens. He shifted his foot and his mouth twisted into an awkward expression. His hands slipped into his pockets of his jeans, and one of them gripped his wand, incase she hexed him. Lily just stared at him; her eyes had stopped shining which they usually did when she was around him. She frowned, and tears formed in her eyes. She fought the urge to cry. Daniel had just broken her heart into three million un-fixable pieces. Daniel hated to see her cry so he turned on his heel and walked towards the Hufflepuff common room.

"Isn't it marvelous?" Lily asked, twirling around.

"I'm so sorry, Lily. I've been cheating on you." James told her.

"What?" Sirius and Remus demanded, turning on him.

"Yes, it's true." James hung his head. "I'm in love with...Brasupelton."

"No!" Lily cried, turning on her heel and runing back to the dormatory.

"How could you James?" Sirius demanded, and then punched his best friend. "Pull yourself together, man!"

and what will happen now?

(I took that first paragraph from an entertaining fanfiction...)
Subject: ooooo


Author:
James
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 06:54:51 04/29/03 Tue

Chrissy glanced over at Maddi, who was cackling in a corner after broadcasting her derranged story to them all. "Ummmm..." she said, stepping away, "We'll just leave her there."

As Chels continued with the broadcast, Chrissy and Lauren snuck out ito the hall.

"We have to write Mr. K back in." Lauren was saying. "It's the only way to stop this maddness."

"No..." pouted Chrissy. "i spen this entire story trying to keep him out of here!"

"Common!" said Lauren. "Its the only way to get us out of here and stop Chels and Maddi from taking over the wizard world!"

"OK, Fufu wins..." Chrissy replied, handing the notebook to Lauren. Lauren scribbled in Mr. K, who glanced around and sighed, "Not again."

The two girls and their math teacher burst into the office, turning off the PA and taking chels by surprise.

"No More, Ms. Leonowicz!" said Mr. K, dragging her and Maddi over to the notebook and getting ready to write them all back.

"Thats what you think!" cried out Chels, yanking herself away and whistling. A hoard of cornish pixies came and grabbed Lauren, Mr. K, and Chrissy by their ears and dragged them away to a small locked classroom where apparently all of the marauders, except Peter, were being kept.

"NOOOOO!!!" cried Chrissy, banging her head repeatedly aginst the wall. It took James and Lauren to keep her from getting a concusion.
Subject: iwelgufwelug


Author:
Sirius
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 06:38:25 04/29/03 Tue

"LISTEN TO ME, STINKY DIRT CHILDREN! YOU WILL FIRST TIE UP THOSE YOU CALL 'TEACHERS'" Maddi yelled, clearly not actually in possession of the PA microphone.

"Why?" Sirius challanged, shaking a defiant fist at the speaker.

Maddi stuck her head into the classroom, having ran as dast as she could to get there. "Because, Short Fish, I am your alter ego, Brunehilda."

Sirius dropped to his knees, raising his arms to the sky as if to plead 'why'. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" he said instead.

Chrissy and Chels grabbed Maddi's shirt and dragged her back to the office.

James, however, decided to travel through a secret passage to Hogsmeade. Grinning widely, he repeatedly asked the manager of Jerry's Bake Shop for food.

"In that case," he said, "In that case, what do you have?"

"All I've got right now is this box of one dozen starving crazed weasels."

"Okay, I'll take that."

Moments later, James stumbled out onto the street with weasels on his face.

Brasupelton the soul sucking tango dancer approched him and said, "Hey, you've got weasels on your face."

After that, the world was their burreto.

What will Lily do now?

Stay Tuned, Folks...
Subject: Pouncing's fun...


Author:
Peter/CHels
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 16:13:39 04/28/03 Mon

(Which one of us pounced)

"Attention all fictional characters of the world of Harry Potter!!!" Maddi boomed into the PA microphone, "We have taken your school hostage. You are no longer free to do as you wish, and will now do our bidding."
All the students froze instantly all over the school. They looked at the PA speakers as if they held the answer to some perplexing perdicimate. The PA was silent for a moment before there could be heard the muffled sound of the editors wrestling over the micophone.
"It's mine!" could be heard clearly. As well as the scream of pain as someone was bitten.
Eventually Chrissy grabbed the microphone and announced,"There's no need for you to be alarmed, fair students and mythical creatures. We mean you no *cough* physical harm."
Someone else in the background murmured, "Mental on the other hand..."
"Shush!" Chrissy hissed. There was some more weird comotion on the other end of the speaker and the microphone changed hands.
"We can't keep up this charade any longer," Chels started, "We feel that you have the right to know that-"
She paused and her last word echoed throughout the still hallways of Hogwarts.
"That you're lives are being controled by we simple editors..." Chels finished.
"Meaning, four teenage American girls from Michigan." Maddi clarified. A few people gasped at this news and others were thrown into complete histerics.
"See! I told you! I told you all!" a deranged James cackled at his classmates.
Sirius grasped his shoulder firmly, pressing the younge Potter back down into his seat, "James...are you ok?"
The only response that James made was cackling evily in long spurts of MWAAAAHAHAHAHA! MWAHAHAHAHA! Those around him backed away.
Subject: grtdjkn


Author:
Sirius
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 05:30:50 04/28/03 Mon

Shoving the Editors out of their story, the Marauders sat back down in their gameshow seats. Peter, looking throughly hassled, grabbed his microphone again. The two professors stood back to watch.

"Yes, ummm..." Peter mumbled. "Lil, just guess already."

"James is bachelor number six." Lily replied.

"How did you know? There were only five guys!" Peter cried.

"He told me." Lily said innocently. "When Oprah was attacking."

Peter whacked his head with his hand. "You weren't supposed to cheat!"

"I didn't..." she pouted.

"Oh well, give it a rest. I'm hungry, and I think I've got a good prank." Sirius muttered, grabbing Remus and Peter and dragging them off to the Great Hall.

No one saw the sinister mob of teenage girls trying to be inconspicous behind them...no one heard one mutter angerily, "Roxie, you copper chicken, stop stepping on my toes!" ...no one saw one of the black robed figures break away from the group, climb up the wall, utter a suspicous howl, and pounce on Professor Dumbledore.

The editors ran into the headmaster's office, tying him up and leaving him in Filches' broom closet.

Maddi grabbed the michrophone for the PA system...

(mwa ha ha ha ha *hack hack wheeze* ha ha ha ha ha!)
Subject: Uhhhhh


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 05:11:43 04/28/03 Mon

"Uhh..." was Lauren's scary little response. "Ummm."

"Aww...so it's just us?" Chrissy scowled. "No fair."

Chels grinned. "But it's such a gift! You should enjoy what only you have!"

"I don't want it..."
Subject: >:) Im home :)


Author:
Peter/Chels
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 06:33:48 04/27/03 Sun

Suddenly Chrissy was overcome with the urge to sneeze. And when she did a tiny little man about 4 inches tall came out of her mouth.
"Ew..." Lauren murmured, backing away from the little person.
"Hey! You have nose dwarves too!" Chels exclaimed, finally finding that she was not the lone sufferor of such a disease. The others looked at her cautiously.
"You frequently have small people come out of your mouth???"Maddi inquired hesitently.
"Yeah, don't you?"
"No..."
Subject: well, this is just...neat.


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 16:59:53 04/26/03 Sat

"Hah! Got you!" Lupin yelled, pointing a finger at the trapped Editors and their math teacher. "You no longer hold power over our futures! We're impeaching you!"

"Uh, Moony?" James whispered. "We can't impeach them when we never elected them in the first place."

"Oh."

"But," he continued, evil smile in place, " we can still use magic on them until they beg us to leave them alone and then they'll stay out of our story for good!"

"Wanna make a bet on that?" Lauren mumbled through frozen lips. The other Editors, minus Mr. K, looked thouroghly excited by the prospect of being cast spells on....(was that a sentence?)
Subject: cornish pixies rock!


Author:
James James James Jamie Jimbo Juno... wait a sec!
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 11:53:14 04/26/03 Sat

Chrissy made a weird pouty face, and took off as lauren chased her around the computer room.

Chels shook her head, and, using the computer, wrote herself back into the story. She grabbed the notebook, which was sitting under Lily's chair, and picked up her pen to begin writting herself and Mr. K out.

Just as Chels prepared to write, Cara rushed in with Snape, Lily, Professer McGonagal and Professer Dumbledore. She pulled out her wand and cried "IMOBULOUS!" The marauders, Mr. K, and Chels all froze in their place, along with the little Cornish Pixies that Maddi had written in just for kicks.
Subject: hey, its just us! *evil grin* this oughtta b fun!


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 10:44:35 04/25/03 Fri

(yea, she's gone....long gone. so its just us....heheheheh!)

"You left the sacred notebook?" Lauren howled in anger. "Ok, now I wish I were a werewolf again so I could eat you!"

"Technically, you were a puppy," Chels offered, sniggering behind her hand. "A cute wittle doggie-poo!"

"Shut up," the former doggie-poo growled. "That was your fault, not mine..."
Subject: hehe


Author:
James the... Oprah-hunter?
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 07:47:03 04/25/03 Fri

(yay! fun charmed characters! don't worry, i get it! and madi should too... did she go on vacation already? are me and lauren alone now?! WAHHHH!!!)

Maddi teleported herself back, dragging Chrissy along behind her. Maddi took the notebook from Chels, who was once again trying to write in Mr. K and shoved it at Chrissy.

Wimpering, Chrissy wrote all the characters back into their original places. The marauders were back, the editors were gone, and they had... left Mr. K in an Oprah wig?

James freaked out when he saw Mr. K. "AHH! Oprah! NOOO!" he cried.

Mr. K grew frantic as he ran from the marauders charms being cast at him. "TINA! er... wait... CHRISTINE! GET ME OUT OF HERE!"

They heard a scaamble of editors trying to find something, and then came Chrissy's voice saying, "I think we left it there... sorry." then there were more angry voices and the sound of Chrissy running from Lauren, who apparently wanted her notebook back.
Subject: ah!!!! what did u do????


Author:
fufu the confuzzled..again
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 12:28:16 04/24/03 Thu

"Wait,wait..." Maddi paused. "Wait a minute...we're the marauders?? Does that mean we're...the real marauders? Cool!"

"Doesn't that mean....oh crap, Fufu's not a werewolf?" Chels asked, looking frightfully at the evilly grinning teen in the chair opposite hers. Lauren waved.

"Hi."

"Oh my....Chrissy!"

Chrissy was still running, however, and had made it to Ireland by now. Maddi teleported after her, leaving a terrified Chelsea looking at the sky and yelling,"Don't leave me with her! Take me! Or take her!"

Fufu grinned smugly. "Hi. You're a rat. And I'm a wolf. How cool is that?"

"HELP!!!!! HELLLPPPPPPPPP!!!!!" Chels responded as the moon appeared in the corner of the sound stage. "Good God, save me!!!!!"

Lauren wolfed out then and cackled. Chelsea grabbed for her notebook and scribbled something franitc. The wolf shrunk.

"Arf?" Fufu cocked her head as she became an innocent gray puppy. Chels grinned in relief, then began yelling angry things at the "marauders" that had disappeared.

Suddenly, three women appeared, yelling at each other.

"I can't see!"

"What?"

"mmph!"

"WHAT??"

"I can't see!"

Chels blinked and quickly scribbled the Charmed Ones out of the tale. Lauren the puppy barked in disappointment.

(well, that was odd...i was bored, sue me!......chrissy, that last part was for ur benifet, if u cant get it, then i alone hold the secret!!mwahahahaha!!!!!)
Subject: very scary post


Author:
James
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 06:28:48 04/24/03 Thu

With a wave of her hands, Oprah and three scarry iinterior designers ran onto the set and began redesigning everything in sight, including Dumbledore's log-belt and red robes.

The Editors leaped up and pulled Oprah to the floor while the marauders did the sake to the designers. Chrissy hopped up and yanked the book from Chels's hands, who had just written in Mr. Kopas. Scribbling madly, the entire set burst into a cloud of smoke.

When the smoke cleared, the editors were in the seats of the marauders, were dressed like the marauders, Oprah was gone, and the actual marauders were no where to be found.

Lauren sat back in her soft plush chair. "Well, this isn't so bad." Chels and Maddi nearly chocked Chrissy who was huddled in her seat.

"WHAT DID YOU DO?!" cried Maddi, reaching for Chrissy's neck.

"N-Nothing." Chrissy stammered, leaping up and bounding out of the room with Chels and Maddi hot on her heels.

The Marauders voices camedown from the heavens. "What just happened?" came James's voice. "This doesn't look anything like Hogwarts..."

"Thats because it's not." Came Sirius's voice.
Subject: hey, im at maddis...


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 19:20:42 04/22/03 Tue

(scary little keyboard)

"Um...ok." Peter twitched. "I'm not sure what happened here...but the threat appears to have passed! Yay!!! No more Oprah!!!"

Even as he spoke, Oprah staggered in, bald as a cue ball. "Why, hello everone!! How are you all today!!"

"AGGGGG!!!!" Everyone began screaming and running in circles. She grinned cheerfully.

"Well, that's just peachy!!" she exclaimed. "I'm soooo glad you've all done so..." She looked around and wrinkled her nose. "Well, you really haven't done very well here, have you? You've ruined the place!! Look how horribly you've created this set! This is not how a set should be!!"

"Did we ask you?" Lupin asked irritably.
Subject: noooooooooooo! I am not your mother!


Author:
Sirius
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 19:05:55 04/22/03 Tue

Maddi snatched up a notebook and began to scribble in it, proclaiming, "I refuse to be written in again!"

The Editors all evaporated in their pink glittery puffs of smoke.

"And now...um...commercial break!" Peter announced shakily.

**commercial break**

Maddi walkes onto the screen, holding the end of a rope in one hand and a can of some dubious looking liquid in the other. Hog-tied in the rope was Fufu, Chels, Chrissy, and Tara dressed up as deranged teddy-bears.

You see several authentic Ewoks walk up to the edge of a diving board, grinning happily. One by one they walked off the edge and fell into a giant blender. Maddi clicked it on, the other Editors protesting with blood-curdling screams.

"Stop the abuse!" Chels screamed, kicking her heels.

"There's no place like home!" Fufu added.

Maddi filled her glass a second time and held it up.

"Drink the higher drink--BLENDED EWOK!" she sang, holding it up to the screen. Chels cut through the rope with an anubis mask and ran down Maddi. The camera fizzles out to static for a moment.

**end of commercial**

You see the Marauders, sitting calmly as they were before the unschduled Editor cameo. Orpah's wig is lying on the ground, the acutal authentic Oprah no where in site.

(hi Chels! Have fun with your questionably accepted internet connection! How're things in Flordia? We just finished our scary Anne Frank home model, and Fufu is spending the night. We've got Monty Python sound clips for you...)
Subject: hey! its chels!!!!!hi!!!!


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 13:29:33 04/22/03 Tue

(hey, u appeared!!! yayay!!! No, the bunny bit no one, tho i got bitten by my evil queen amidala book...bad book!..star wars 2 is a really good movie, anyone know that? i've been hooked...but i refuse to read that book, so dont even try it maddi!..o ya, and since when am i the sound girl???)

Chels began dancing about the stage yelling, "I am Godzilla!! Hear me roar!!"

Lauren raised her eyebrows behind a Yoda mask. "You're who?"

Maddi appeared and tossed lightsabers to the two delusional editors. "Here!! We can reenact scenes from the movies!!"

Lupin choked. "Uh, hello? Have we forgotten the emergency??"

"What?"

"OPRAH!!!" he yelled, scrambling up a curtain.
Subject: Howdy y'all


Author:
peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 15:55:51 04/20/03 Sun

(Hey! I found *cough cough* an internet-connected computer down here in Florida! How's the weather up there? Warm? Cold? Well it's nice down here, been around 75 all week ((all three days)). How's everyone's Easter? Good? Bad? Did the bunny bite anyone? Well i'll just get to my post now...*tear* I miss u!)

A sickly looking guy comes up through the floor and mutters something about it's against company policy to remove greasy pale people.
"What??! I want him out!" Lily yelled.
"I-i-im sorry, Mm, ma'am. Bu, bu, bbut it's against th, the policy-" the sickly man stuttered.
"No!" But the man had already sunk back into the floor.
Scarey tuxedo Peter (sounds like a type of barbie doll) grinned nerviously, "well how bout another commercial break?"
As his hand went to press the button there was a voice heard from offstage. In walked Opra (again).
"AHHHHHHHHHHH!" Peter screamed, sweat had appeared on his face as he pressed the button furiously to no avail.
"Press harder! PRESS HARDER!" Sirius urged, glancing back at the approaching Opra.
"I'm trying, i'm trying!" Peter replied.
"here, let me at it." Lily said, pushing Peter aside. But the button refused to work.
"She's going to eat us alive!!!!!!!!!!" Lupin hollared, grasping for anything he could grab. Suddenly scarey Godzilla music started to play and you could hear the Japanese screams in the background. the Marauders paused and looked to Lauren, the soundeffects girl.
"What's with the music?"
"And the screaming?"
Lauren shrugged, "I thought it would liven the situation a bit..."
Subject: hey, im back..wat r u doing to me?????


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 09:55:37 04/17/03 Thu

Remus growled nervously "Hey, uh, I thought you said you weren't ever going to show that commercial...You lie!"

Peter backed away from the wall. "Uh...yes, well....Lily, would you like to continue?"

"Not really..." She grinned falsely. "I mean, sure, wormy...er, Wormtail."

He scowled. "Not funny."

She smiled. "Yes it was..um...so, bachelor # 3, what is your favorite class?"

"Defense against the dark arts....but I'll go to Potions if i have to...."The voice replied darkly.

Lily gagged. "Snape??? Is this some kind of sick joke? Ew,. nasty!!! Get him out of here!!! Security, go stuff a sock in his mouth!"
Subject: lalalalalalala


Author:
James
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 07:01:43 04/17/03 Thu

"Ok we have two... er," he stumbled backwards as Remus growled and went back to his seat,"three bachlors left. Which one is James? Will Lily end up with a boyfriend that is not her own? Find out after this message!"

**Commercial break**

We see Remus, in his wolf form sitting on a hill, howling at a full moon. The announcer begins:

Tired of getting shoes thrown at you every full moon?

A shoe is pitched at Remus, who growls and leaps on the attacker. We hear screams, growls, and tears. The announcer continues:

Tire of getting chased by dog catchers every time you try to go outside?

We now see Sirius, in his dog form, being chased by a dog-catcher with a large net. Sirius abruptly turns around and tackles the dog-catcher. They fall out of view and we hear screams, growls, and tears. The announcer continues:

Then maybe you need...

LETS-CONTROLL-THE-HUMAN-RACE SPRAY!

Spray this on any human and they will obey you every whim!

We see Remus with a person behind him on the hill, playing a violin while he howls at the moon.

We see Sirius being pampered by the dog-catcher. Both are smiling and happy.

**Back to the show**
Subject: ajfkdjs


Author:
Sirius
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 06:50:41 04/17/03 Thu

...she and the other Marauders could be dragged away to play 'mystery date'!

Peter, in a scary tuxedo with a large microphone appeared on the screen. He grinned widely and began to explain the basic rules of the show.

"Here with us today we have Miss Lily Evans, a charming fourteen year old girl who enjoys muggle activites and psychologically messing up her boyfriends!"

"I do not!" Lily exclaimed. Peter called for security, and Lily tried to talk around the sock they plavced in her mouth, but all she managed was 'neederhoysen'.

"Happy holidays, too." Peter replied. "Now, Lily must guess who is James by asking questions to the bachelors tied up in the basement...er, sitting on the other side of this wall!"

The audience gave a monotone cheer.

"Okay...hmm...bachelor number four, what were you doing on the fourteenth of May?" Lily asked.

"Cleaning the third floor corridor." he replied, revealing himself to be none other than Filch!

"Gah! You're Filch!" Lily exclaimed. Peter pulled a lever and a buzzer sounded. Filch was thrown out the windw--the window--the second story window.

"Ummm...bachelor number two, what does the full moon mean to you?"

"Fur and fangs?" he replied pitifully.

"Buh-bye, Moony." Lily said, and Peter once again pulled the lever. A hysterical Remus was dragged away from the other guys, trying frantically to bite the security officer attempting to pitch him out the window--the window--the secend story window...

"Gah! He bit me!" the officer cried. A pile of SWAT team men fell on top of him, trying to de-werewolf him.

"A useless battle." Bachelor number three muttered...
Subject: rsdfjhgb


Author:
Sirius
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 06:46:51 04/17/03 Thu

...she and the other Marauders could be dragged away to play 'mystery date'!

Peter, in a scary tuxedo with a large microphone appeared on the screen. He grinned widely and began to explain the basic rules of the show.

"Here with us today we have Miss Lily Evans, a charming fourteen year old girl who enjoys muggle activites and psychologically messing up her boyfriends!"

"I do not!" Lily exclaimed. Peter called for security, and Lily tried to talk around the sock they plavced in her mouth, but all she managed was 'neederhoysen'.

"Happy holidays, too." Peter replied. "Now, Lily must guess who is James by asking questions to the bachelors tied up in the basement...er, sitting on the other side of this wall!"

The audience gave a monotone cheer.

"Okay...hmm...bachelor number three, what were you doing on the fourteenth of May?" Lily asked.

"Cleaning the third floor corridor." he replied, revealing himself to be none other than Filch!

"Gah! You're Filch!" Lily exclaimed. Peter pulled a lever and a buzzer sounded. Filch was thrown out the windw--the window--the second story window.

"Ummm...bachelor number two, what does the full moon mean to you?"

"Fur and fangs?" he replied pitifully.

"Buh-bye, Moony." Lily said, and Peter once again pulled the lever. A hysterical Remus was dragged away from the other guys, trying frantically to bite the security officer attempting to pitch him out the window--the window--the secend story window...

"Gah! He bit me!" the officer cried. A pile of SWAT team men fell on top of him, trying to de-werewolf him.

"A useless battle." Bachelor number three muttered...
Subject: time to fly


Author:
James
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 06:37:39 04/17/03 Thu

(sorry I never finished that sentence so maddi's gonna finish it for me!)
Subject: gvgg


Author:
James
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 05:20:51 04/17/03 Thu

Chrissy and Chels shatched away the pen and notebook from Lauren while Maddi gave the parchment back to the marauders muttering something like, "You guys are pathetic..."
Lily snatched back her homework and ran off to give it to her teacher before
Subject: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Author:
Peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 15:14:49 04/16/03 Wed

(not a-one)

"Hey! We didn't write that in!" Lauren yelled in protest, she snatched the parchment out of their hands to read it. As Maddi and Chel batted the Marauders away Lauren and Chrissy examined the parchment with confused faces.
"You finally understand arithmecy?" Chrissy asked, wrinkling her nose.
"Yep." Lily replied happily.
"That's the big news?"Maddi replied.
"Yeah, that an *sighs and reads off a script with annoyingly choppy speach* Mis-ter Win-stan (not an error)"
"Winston" Chels corrected.
"Ok, right *returns eyes to script* is dead."
"Dying" Maddi muttered.
Chels gasped and began to wimper.
"Chels, shut up, we know you already know this." Chrissy growled.
"Oh..."
"OMG! I know what this is! It's a terrible TV soap opera!!!" The marauders gasped in horror.
Lauren grinned evily, "And this time you won't find a way out!"
"NOOOOOOOOOO!"
"Yes! Yes! YESSS!!!" Lauren screached.
"Supress that fufu!" Maddi ordered.
Subject: fdd


Author:
James
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 06:59:58 04/16/03 Wed

The editors voices sudddenly came down from the sky again, shout things like, "NO!" "Don't Even!" and "Wait!".
The marauders laughed and began talking about their next prank, while chels was saying over and over, "Can we go now?" and the others constantly responded, "No."
Lily just then came bursting into the great hall, waving a piece of paper in her hand. "I've got it! I finally got it!"
Sirius and James ran up to meet her. "You finally got it?" they asked her. Winded and gasping for air, she nodded and bent over, handing the paper to the boys who grabbed at eagerly and began to read it with evil smirks.
"Ummm... you got what?" Peter aske, very much confused.
"This!" cried James, waving the parchment in Peter and Remus's face. They grabbed it and began to read it.

(any one have any ideas?)
Subject: mwa ha ha ha


Author:
Sirius
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 06:40:45 04/16/03 Wed

It didn't surprise anyone when a severely tired Remus Lupin was wheeled into Divination by several of his friends. The full moon shone at them through the window was almost cheerful. Upon seeing it, Remus relapsed into another seisure and had to be taken back to the Hospital Wing for a calming potion.

"I think we need to ignore what the Editors tell us to do," James whispered to Sirius.

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"Well, you know that little voice in your head that sounds like the blonde one that tells you to do stupid things, like walk into walls?" James asked hurridly.

"No..." Sirius replied. "Are you feeling okay, James?" he asked. "Maybe that detention has gone to your head..."

"James is hearing voices?" Peter asked. "MAYBE IT'S LILY!" he shouted.

Everyone in the great hall turned to stare at them. Someone shook their head.

"She must be having a negative effect on his brain..." Peter finished cryptically, wiggling the fingers of one hand.

"Would you shut up already?" Sirius demanded. Peter hung his head.
Subject: meaifjdos


Author:
Peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 05:20:22 04/16/03 Wed

"Yes, yet. You're still useful to use." a duranged Sirius muttered under his breath.
"Excuse me?" Lupin replied, he turned pale and started to swet.
"What?"
"What?!?"Lupin was spazzing out with ideas clouding into his head. Ideas of deceat, betrayal, evil duckies!
"What's wrong with you?"Cara asked, a little afraid of Lupin. But he didn't reply. He had fallen on the ground ina cold sweat, his eyes seemed to be bugging out of his head and he was gasping for breath.
"He looks ill." Sirius confirmed the obvious.
"Hurry! Get him t the hospital wing!" James yelled as Lupin blacked out totally.

"It seems your friend here is suffering from severe stress. Is there any soarse of stress that you can illiminate?" the nurse asked.
The Marauders glanced up at the sky as if they could see the Editors and growled.
Subject: Ag! Don't eat me!


Author:
Fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 05:17:03 04/16/03 Wed

(hey, so its my turn to being mauled by our twisted minds?)

Remus scowled as they finished up and walked to Divination. The teacher greeted him with a gasp.

"My dear...my poor poor---"

"Stuff it," he told her irritably. "I'm not gonna die.."

"Whoever said anything about dying, Mr. Lupin??" she demanded somewhat angrilly. "I've seen your future and it is really terrible test scores. Where has your head been young man?? I need to speak to you after class."

"Oh," the young wolf muttered as he slunk to his seat, trying to ignore his scary giggling friends.
Subject: boo


Author:
Sirius
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 05:11:26 04/16/03 Wed

The Marauders filed into breakfast, not really sure exactly where Lily had been dragged off to for detention. James had vowed to find her the night before, but had instead coaxed the kitchen elves into giving the marauders some food, sinse they haven't eaten any sense before the Editors jumped into their world.

"Okay, today in Divination we're going to do something," Sirius announced.

"Like what?" James asked.

"A prank, what did you think? We were actually going to learn something?" Peter demanded.

Remus went all pale. "The Professor is going to predict my death again. Remember the crystal balls?"

"You're not seriously believing what that old fraud said, are you?"

"So this is where your irrational fear of crystal balls comes from," James said thoughtfully. "Don't worry, we won't let Mincet kill you yet."

"Mincet? That Slytherin? YET?!" Remus demanded, but they had all returned to their meals.
Subject: Hoola Hooop


Author:
Peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 17:36:03 04/15/03 Tue

"I think i liked it before i knew that we were being manipulated by a bunch of teenage girls from America..." James confided.
"Yeah, me too. They're really evil and twisted, it makes you wonder what happened to them as children." Lupin agreed.
"Perhaps its steroids that the government's feeding them to build a super army!" Peter blurted. Everyone looked at him like he was a stupid weirdo, which he was. And Cara wondered why she was going out with this fool.
Subject: umm.....ya


Author:
fufu
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 15:49:42 04/15/03 Tue

Lily was amused, struck by a sudden bout of hysteria. She danced insted of ran and giggled evilly.

Lupin looked up. "Hey! Guys! Knock it off!!! "

"No way, Sparky!" Fufu's voice called down.
Subject: Run away!


Author:
Peter
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 14:41:02 04/15/03 Tue

Again the cilestial(sp?) voices of the Editors floated down from the heavens.
"Sorry, it was Mr. Kopas..."
It didn't make Lilly and less angry, but she figured that teachers had to stick with their own kind because a bird may love a fish, but where would they build a home together?
After this philisophical thought Lilly decided to bite her evil arithmacy teacher. CHUNK!
"Owwwww!" The old woman yelled.
"Quick, run away!" Sirius ordered the retreat and they all ran, Lilly leading of coarse.
Subject: Aw, no more us...and colleen has 2 L's Maddi...bad...


Author:
Fufu (colleen, doreen, alan, monroe, roxie, shep, remus)
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 05:38:07 04/15/03 Tue

"Yes, is that so wrong?" Lily asked. "Not like the old bat who teaches the class ever notices..."

As if on cue, the woman who generally slept through her own classes appeared and grabbed the young readhead's arm. "To detention with you, Ms. Evans," she announced. The Mauarders collapsed in hysteria as she shot them a helpless look.

"Darn you, Editors!!" she cried, shaking a fist. "I will get you for this!!!!"
Subject: good-byes


Author:
Maddi/Sirius
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 05:19:51 04/15/03 Tue

(thank you all for voting. We'll come back later, Chels. at total random. don't worry.)

it was a sad time for everyone. the Marauders and the Editors all hugged, eventually forming a line to shake hands with Mr. Kopas, who was passing out random pez containers.

At long last, the knights of NI who had stolen Maddi's laptop were overthrown with several stragetically placed charms and other evil curses. She reclaimed her laptop and wrote out the editors, in this sacred passage:

[i/] "...and the Editors (Maddi, Chrissy, Chels, Fufu ((aka, coleen, doreen, allen, monroe, shep, roxie, remus...)), and Mr. Kopas) all left in several pink puffs of smoke that were infused with large shards of silver glitter. before the Marauders could move, though, a warning voice cried "you stupid ardvarks, don't you know that cigareetes kill?" sounding scarily alike to Chels..." [i/:]

the marauders cackled insanely and ran about in their new...er, freedom. James, feeling free again, hopped up and began to skip in scary circles with the rest of the marauders to creepy jewish wedding music until he got dizy and escaped.

"I suggest we get to class. we're going to fail if we don't get to class soon. We've been skipping since that creature showed up."

"Has anyone seen Cara?" Peter asked.

"She must have been taken with the Editors!" James cried, dropping to his knees.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Peter screamed.

"um, guys? I'm right here..." Cara said, looking up from her homework. "does anyone know what arithmancy is?"

"no idea," Lily replied, shrugging. "I just copy his," she offered, pointing at James.

"oooh, you cheat..." Sirius muttered with an evil cackle...
Subject: Mr. Kopas's vote


Author:
Mr. Kopas
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 05:07:26 04/15/03 Tue

aye!
Subject: ummm


Author:
James
[ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 05:07:19 04/15/03 Tue

i say..........

i say..........

we all sit down! no wait...

i say..........

i say..........

aye, lassie!
Subject: votes


Author:
Maddi
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Date Posted: 05:03:39 04/15/03 Tue

(current standings:

nays: 1

pickles: 1

ayes: 1

vote Chrissy!)
Subject: Pickley!!


Author:
Fufu
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Date Posted: 05:02:40 04/15/03 Tue

(i dunno, but i find both very amusing. go w/ it, Sock-Girl)
Subject: Voter


Author:
Chels/Pete
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Date Posted: 05:02:34 04/15/03 Tue

NAAAY, im not a horse! Stop judging
Subject: yrcfhg


Author:
Sirius
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Date Posted: 05:00:13 04/15/03 Tue

Maddi, seeming to come back into her own mind, shook her head and sighed.

"We've degraded from an entertaining comedy to a suppourt group in a matter of paragraphs," she tsked, causing the other Editors to bow their heads. "I think it is time that we left the Marauders to their own devices. They're entertaining enough for us all, and I've got a couple more pranks up my sleeves...and in my left sock, but never mind..."

(okay, let's vote. All who want to get back to the Marauders, say aye. all who want to continue our scary cameos, say nay. all who don't really care and wany to leave it up to me, say...pickle. ~Maddi)
Subject: Mr. Winston


Author:
Peter
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Date Posted: 16:10:34 04/14/03 Mon

Chels looked away from the accusing faces of her friends, "Maybe i did, maybe i didn't. You can't press charges without a body!"
"So you're admitting to your involvement in the murder of Mr. Alibaster Winston?" Lauren shot back. By now the photographers had gathered and were snapping shots of Chels with their merciless flashbulbs.
"I loved Mr. Winston! And i would never hurt him! He was my husband, and you'll never understand how much i loved that man--erm cat. He was everything to me! He was my life! I could never kill him, never!" Chels broke down crying.
"Your gize is clever, Mrs. Winston, but you can't fool me. I know the truth." Maddi yelled back, her defense unfalturing, "You did love your husband, and you couldn't stand letting anyone else having him, especailly a Miss Verginia Pabitsworth."
An elderly woman who smelled like cat food came forth from the crowd. Her skin was pale, almost green, and she was clad in a green flower-patterned cotton dress that looked like it had once been a pair of loveseat cushion covers. On her craining nose balanced a '80s-style pair of yellowed glasses. Her eyes were magnified by the high perscription and thickness of the glasses, making her look more like an alien than a human.
"Mr. Winston was spending more and more time with Miss Pabitsworth and you couldn't stand it. Each night he would return with her goat's milk on his breath. And it was driving you insaine. Wasn't it?!??" Lauren yelled.
"No! No! It's all a lie! You're telling lies! I loved him, i loved him!!!" Chels screamed her pleas at the judge (Mr. Kopas). He starred back just shaking his head at the sick-mindedness of this girl.
"Then one night you couldn't take it any more. He told you he was leaving, there was a fight. The neighbors heard it all. You couldn't let him go because if you couldn't have him she couldn't have him. Isn't that right?" Lauren continued.
Subject: i, um....


Author:
fufu
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Date Posted: 11:47:57 04/13/03 Sun

(i just realized that made absolutly no sense, but it was fun, so lets go w/ it, shall we...)

Chrissy pointed after the cat. "Well, if you got Mr. Winston, who was that???"

Chels looked ashamed and Fufu nodded knowingly. "You were not happy witht he results of your temporary..or not, insanity, so you went and brought him back from the dead, didn't you??"
Subject: Ha ha ha ha!!!! The play was fun!


Author:
Fufu the Learned Chalk...er....
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Date Posted: 11:43:08 04/13/03 Sun

"You lie!" yelled Fufu. "You are Mrs. Chelsea Patsy Winston, and you know it!"

"Yeah," Maddi added. "Besides, we saw you on divorce court, claiming that your husband spent too many nights out with the tomcats and never came home for his milk at night. Which proves one of two points. One, you are the wife of one Mr. Winston. Or b..."

"You are Mrs. Frank!!" yelled Fufu, scrambling out from under her Coke can. "And 'b' doesn't come after 1, Maddi..."

"Right," Maddi agreed, then scowled. "And it does too. Stop trying to change the rules Fufu."

Fufu smirked as Maddi continued speaking into the camera. "And anyone who watched that particular episode would know that Chels came on exactly one week after Mr. Winston disappeared, claiming that her husband was killed by a pack of ravenous dogs."

A collective gasp went up around the audience that had appeared. "Do you mean that Mr. Winston's untimely end was in fact the fault of...." Fufu cut herself off in shock and all eyes turned to Chels.

"The dogs...*pant pant, sob* They got Mr. Winston...*Sob*"

"Oh, come off it, Chels, we know the truth. You came after your husband with a pair of hedge clippers when he came home late one night," Chrissy admonished.
Subject: Patsy!


Author:
Peter? CHels?
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Date Posted: 18:10:02 04/10/03 Thu

Tara walked by carrying an opened umbrella to ward off the falling ducks that fell from the small thunder cloud that fallowered her wherever she went.
"You don't need caffiene, you need Hawian Punch." Tara announced to them before walking outof the camera's view.
Hey, how long have you been filming us?" Maddi asked the cameraperson.
Chels grinned, "Um...an hour or two?"
"Chels! You didn't warn me?! We could have made fun faces, did variations of the bottle dance, giggled, and taped Mr. Winston!" Chrissy yelled from beneath the can.
"Sorry?" Chels replied, but her short attention span was grabbed by Mr. Winston--her 3rd husband--walking through the scene, "Mr. Winston!"
"Hm...if he's Mr. Winston, doesn't that make you Mrs. Winston?" a dense Peter asked.
Chels blushed, "No! I am Patsy."
Subject: Oo!! I think my X2 book's at the library!!


Author:
Fufu
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Date Posted: 13:26:38 04/09/03 Wed

Fufu stirred from under teh Coke can. Her head was half-crushed, but she seemed to be deeply amused. "Hey! Pop! CAFFIENE!!!!"

Maddi and the others attempted to drag Lauren away from the can yelling things like, "Don't feed the Fufu..or water her!" and "No! Keep her away from the sugar!!!"
Subject: poor you


Author:
Sirius
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Date Posted: 07:09:26 04/09/03 Wed

Maddi thoughtfully strocked her chin, as thouightful people frequently do.

"How?" she finally wrote on her hand and stuffewd it back under the can.

"I DON'T CARE HOW!" Chrissy yelled back.

Maddi backed away, miffed. "You don't hafta shout." she pouted.
Subject: poor you


Author:
Sirius
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Date Posted: 07:08:00 04/09/03 Wed

Maddi thoughtfully strocked her chin, as thouightful people frequently do.

"How?" she finally wrote on her hand and stuffewd it back under the can.

"I DON'T CARE HOW!" Chrissy yelled back.

Maddi backed away, miffed. "You don't hafta shout." she pouted.
Subject: i hate em both *pepsi and coke*


Author:
James the crushed
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Date Posted: 07:01:51 04/09/03 Wed

Chrissy was yelling something, but of corse no one could hear because Lauren and Chels were unconcious, the marauders were plotting their fate, and Maddi was still pacing the pop can clicking her tounge in distaste.
Chrissy managed to pop her hand out from under the can. She grabbed Maddi's ankle, who sprawled out onto the grass.
"Hey!" she shouted, trying to yank her foot away with no success.
Finally Chrissy retracted her hand briefly, allowing Maddi to scuttle away. Chrissy poped her hand back out, something scribbled on her palm. Maddi walked up to read it. It said, "MADDI GET BLOODY CAN OFF US NOW!!!"
Subject: and I'm back!


Author:
Sirius
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Date Posted: 06:50:58 04/09/03 Wed

At long last, an extremely frizzled-looking and bleary-eyed Maddi appeared, a odd bulge in her hoodie pocket indicating that she was yet again toteing around several heavy novels with her, thought the chanses that she would actuall read a sentance were slim.

"Oy, what'd I miss?" she asked. Before the startled Editors could reply, however, a giant can of Coke fell on top of them and their sacred math teacher.

Circling the can warily, while the Marauders behind her cackled and scribbled in the notebook with their quills, Maddi sighed and shook her head.

"Pepsi is preferable," she muttered.
Subject: awww... no maddi?


Author:
James
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Date Posted: 09:30:34 04/08/03 Tue

Chels picked up a phone and repeatedly called Maddi's house, shouting again and again, "Maddi wake up! Come enjoy the day with us!"
each time she hung up and slept some more.
Finally they all gave up and went on eating the castle, with the marauders always trying to hold them back.
Subject: Maddi wake up! And get your but to the library!!!


Author:
Peter/Chels
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Date Posted: 09:25:58 04/08/03 Tue

Suddenly there was a large crash as icing came cascading down in a mountain of white.
"Open wide." Maddi yelled from her bedroom, where she'd been sleeping the snowday away as her fellow editors had been at the library having a good laugh.
"The Cafe's open! Come see it!" Chrissy yelled.
But Maddi only groaned and turned over on her side.
"Gr."
Subject: happy b-day to me


Author:
James the 14-year-old
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Date Posted: 09:23:21 04/08/03 Tue

(i just realized that I am as old as the characters! yay!)
Finally getting back into the story, the marauders used their wands to turn thecastle into a birthday cake.
"Oh! Just like Disney World!" Chrissy cried, running up and taking a bite out of the cake/castle.
"No you dolt! Don't eat our school!" Sirius scolded, running up and knocking another piece of the castle out of her hands.
"Awww... ok," Chrissy pouted.
Subject: Happy Bday Chrissy!


Author:
Peter
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Date Posted: 05:48:38 04/08/03 Tue

"Why'd you do that?! It's a bloody snow day! We dont need to go back to school!" Lauren growled.
"Well...it was just too scarey in the alternate universe of Indiana Jones." Mr. Kopas replied.
By this time the Marauders were terribly frightened and stood huddled in the corner.
"Maybe we should make this a love story." Chels offered, the eyes of the Marauders widened in fear and Chels was smacked upside the head by all around her.
"No! Please! Anything but that!" Maddi screamed, smacking chels senseless.
"Anything..." Lauren piped up, her eyes turned and interesting shade of green and she wrote feverishly in the notebook. SOme of the Buffy and Charmed characters attempted to break into the story but with a joint effort the others wrestled the notebook out of lauren's paws.
"If anything we should celebrate someone's birthday." Mr. Kopas said, hinting the others to procure a large birthday cake covered in a delicate array of candles (if that makes any sense), presents by the hundred and a dried up ardvark.
"Oh you shouldn't have." Chrissy murmured, kicking the aardvark off the table.
"We didn't, most of the cake's cardboard, and only four of the presents are real." Lauren said.
"Oh...thanks." Chrissy said, inching away from the aardvark.
Subject: derg


Author:
James
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Date Posted: 19:18:04 04/07/03 Mon

Chrissy held her face head in her hands. "Common, Chels." she said, dragging Chelsea out of the scene with the use of a giant hook that is only used for bad acting.
Chles was so star-struck, she didn't realize that Sean was growing distant until every single one of them was dragging her back to the notebook.
Lauren grabbed for her pencil, only to find it missing. Tara, Chrissy, Chels and Maddi were all snickering, there hands behind their backs.
A Lunch table apeared and they all sat down in their traditional lunch-time positions; Tara on one of the ends, with Lauren next to her; Chelsea across from Tara; Maddi next to Chels; Chrissy next to Maddi.
Lauren leaned over to Maddi. "Maddi, Gimmie my pencil."
"I don't have it," she protested, passing it to Chrissy under the table.
"Chrissy?"
"Madi has it." She passed it back to maddi.
"Maddi?"
"Do not!" Passes it to Chels.
"Chels?"
"Nope." Over to Tara, who sticks it in her book.
"Tara?"
"I swear."
"Maddi..."
"No!"
Lauren leaped up, frusterated. "Who has it?!"
Mr. Kopas sighed, taking out hia own pen and writting them all back to Hogwarts.
Subject: Me!


Author:
Fufu
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Date Posted: 14:38:07 04/07/03 Mon

Chelsea held her breath as the interesting pause went on..and on...and on.....

Finally, she couldn't take it anymore. She lept into the scene and yelled, "Because he didn't take my advice!"

The poor actors-who-thought-they-were-characters eyed her nervously. Madison let out an angry sigh.

"Chels! You're supposed to let them finish!"

Chelsea looked not remotely sheepish. She smiled adoringly up at Sean, who started looking around for a place to hide.

"You're the best actor ever!"

He blinked and attempted to scurry off. "Do I know you...."

She blocked his path. "And I thought you were absolutely marvolous in Finding Forrester!"

He twitched. "Young lady, I have no idea what you're talking abo--"

Chels cut him off. "And don't even get me STARTED on the James Bond movies!"

"Really," Lauren muttered,"Don't..."
Subject: Indiana Jones!!!


Author:
Peter/Chels
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Date Posted: 14:27:20 04/07/03 Mon

"So you like carelessly didn't wipe it off?" Chrissy inquired.
"Well if i would have wiped it he would have smeared, would you rather have our math teacher smeared?" Maddi answered.
"No, heavens no!" Chels agreed.
"Enough, she dies!" a German officer shouted. This German had just appeared out of nowhere. He held an interesting young froline by the hair.
"Excuse me?" Lauren asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Well...erm...i...uh." Tara muttered incoherently.
"Hey! We're in Indiana Jones!" Chrissy exclaimed, and it was so. Around them was not Hogwarts School, instead they were in a Castle on the Austrian-German border where Sean ConnerY as Henry Jones Sr. and Harrison Ford as Indiana Jones were in the middle of a scene.
"I love me life!" Chels squiked happily.
"No! No!" Indiana yelled in protest, sliding his gun across the wooden table.
"Indy, im sorry." the froline said, stealing the dairy from Indy's pocket, "B ut you should have listened to your father..."
"Hey! You're-you're Indiana! I wrote your character!" Lauren screamed.
Indy shot her a scared look, "Who-Who are you?"
"I'm fuf- i mean Lauren. And that's Chrissy, Chels, Tara, Maddi, and Mr. Kopas...oh yeah and those are the MArauders." Lauren introduced.
"Oh my god!!" CHels exclaimed, prancing over to Sean. Sean looked back with a weird, 'where's my body guard when i need him' look but smiled nerviously.
"I was just watching your film Marnie, it was briliant, BRILLIANT!!!!" Chels yelled at the poor man.
"Um...i dont know who you are, but i never made a film and my name is Henry." Sean answered with a hint of fear in his voice.
"Oh yeah, Chels let them get on with their scene." Tara instructed, pulling CHels off the star with the aid of Mr. Kopas and a crowbar.

"How'd you know she was a Nazi?"
"Hm?"
"How did you know she was a Nazi?"
"Oh, she talks in her sleep..." *interesting pause*
Subject: ink


Author:
James
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Date Posted: 08:10:11 04/07/03 Mon

"Chels is the smartest in our math class, isn't that right Mr. Kopas?" Chrissy chirped. Then she did a double take, "Wait, Mr. Kopas?"
Maddi sat cackling in a corner of the castle walls, the notebook in her hand. Mr Kopas had a big ink blot on his face.
"Hey, what's wrong with your face?" Lauren asked.
Maddi stood up. "These quills are horrible writting untensils. I can never use it right. When I wrote his name, the ink blotted."
Subject: math


Author:
Peter
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Date Posted: 04:24:41 04/07/03 Mon

"Can i plead the 5th?" Chels replied.
"How many times do we have to remind you, this is not a democracy!" Lupin yelled.
"But we are people of the democracy." Maddi shot back.
"Ok, and we out-vote you by three, we want you to leave!" SIrius exclaimed.
"Three? I count 2. Who's the third?" Chrissy asked.
"Uh...Mr. Ko-"Peter started.
"He's one of us!"Lauren yelled.
"Snape then." James said, pulling a reluctant Snape over into the cluster of Marauders.
"Darn, Snape can't even do math..." Lupin muttered angrily.
"What do you need done in math?" Chels and Chrissy piped up.
"Oh...uh...this bloody homework." James confessed, handing a piece of parchment to the girls.
"Oh this stuff is really easy, adding is." Chrissy commented.
"Yeah, a piece of cake." Chels agreed.
"Yeah, easy and pie." Lauren restated.
"Hey, you copied!" Chels complained.
"Did not!" defended Lauren.
"Here." Chrissy handed the finished math sheet back to James.
"It's amazing." James said in awe.
Subject: What the heck, Chels??


Author:
Fufu
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Date Posted: 16:01:45 04/06/03 Sun

"Chelsea...do you need to share something?" Fufu asked patiently. Chels shuffled her toe, and didn't answer as the others stared expectantly at her.
Subject: What the heck, Chels??


Author:
Fufu
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Date Posted: 15:59:24 04/06/03 Sun

"Chelsea...do you need to share something?" Fufu asked patiently. Chels shuffled her toe, and didn't answer s the others stared expectantly at her.
Subject: Outter Space!!!!!!!!!!


Author:
Peter/Chels
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Date Posted: 13:02:57 04/05/03 Sat

The Marauders grinned evilly as they scribbled in the notebook.
"No! Please! Have mercy!" the editors cried before they were poofed out.
"THis is our story, buzz off." James said. It suddenly was very quiet on the grounds of Hogwarts. Cara and Peter stood beside eachother quietly, just watching a tumbleweed blow pacifly by.
"Well now that they're gone-" SIrius started but the editors fell out of the sky, landing on the roof of Hogwarts.
"Darn!" Lupin yelled. Maddi grinned and waved madly at the frustrated Marauders.
"And im back, from outter space, come here to see you- What?" Chels muttered, shying away after her terrible attempt at singing.
Subject: frog


Author:
Peter
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Date Posted: 04:50:17 04/03/03 Thu

"No!" the editors gasped.
Subject: sugar! yay!


Author:
Sirius
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Date Posted: 05:54:52 04/01/03 Tue

Maddi, who had rapidly consumed bunches and bunches of gumdrops as they fell from the sky, bounced over to the two editors on Gothic Hill and cheerfully erased the depressing mound of dirt. Chels writhed on the ground until she realized that pure sugar was falling from the sky.

"Okay...who's got the notebook?" Fufu asked the other editors.

"No idea." Maddi shrugged, bouncing up and down.

"Ah! You've been infected with the Fufu syndrome!" Chrissy cried, backing away from her.

At that moment, Chels disapeared with a small 'pop'. the other editors squealed girlishly and condensed into a smaller group than they had been in before.

"Ah! The Marauders took the notebook and are taking their fates--er, destinies into their own hands!" Fufu cried after she caught sight of Remus under the full moon.

"Hey, isn't he dangerous?" Maddi inquired from behind her human sheild--Chrissy.

"They wrote in a cure for lycanthropy." Chels' disembodied voice murmured.

"Gah!" Fufu cried, scrambling over to the remains of Gothic Hill.

"No!" Maddi cried just before she disapeared with another 'pop'.

"They're writing us out!" Chrissy told Fufu and the muted Tara. No one could do anything but stand there and wait to be popped out of the story...
Subject: Ack! I'm choking!! Help meeee!..k, Im fine now!


Author:
fufu
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Date Posted: 05:03:45 04/01/03 Tue

Lauren shifted as she poked a gumdrop. It grinned at her.

"Hi! I'm Poofy!"

She twitched and stepped back a bit. "I don't like my food to talk..."

Joining gothic-Chels on her hill, Lauren confided," I don't really like gumdrops anyway...."
Subject: IfalltheRaindropswereLemondropsandGumdrops...


Author:
Chels-erm-- Peter
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Date Posted: 04:07:34 04/01/03 Tue

"Lets retrieve the REAL Mr. Kopas from the moon." Lauren announced.
"Yeah. Okay, i'll write that." Chrissy leaps at the notebook and writes feverishly on the paper.
"what did you do...?" Maddi inquired, backing away from chrissy.
"Oh nothing..." Chrissy replied with an over-innocent tone to her voice.
Suddenly a low roar of thunder boomed through the sky and lightening struck fiercly at the children. But there was no rain, until lemon drops and gumdrops started raining from the sky.
Chrissy started singing, "If all the rain drops were lemondrops and gumdrops, oh what a rain it would be."
"Nooooooooooo! You and that acursed song!" Chels yelled. But the others were too busy running around with their mouths open. Maddi accidently choked on a gumdrop and Sirius and James had to perform the hymlic manuver to remove the tastey morsle from her throat.
"See i told you, only bad can come from this..."Chels gurgled from the top of a dark hill, looking very gothic.
"The masia!" Lupin exclaimed and down fell the largest gumdrop of them all. The children flocked to it with happy smiles.
"Hello children, i am Jimmy, the magical Gumdrop King-Ah! GOD! WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!? AHHHHHHHHH! HELLLLP!" the gumdrops screamed.
"Mmmm." Maddi murmured after taking a large bite out of King Jimmy Gumdrop.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Jimmy yelled in agony.
"See, no good can come from this." Chels muttered still on her gothic hill.
Subject: adfs


Author:
Peter
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Date Posted: 13:13:14 03/31/03 Mon

"I'm going to miss him..."Peter muttered.
"What??!" the gang yelled.
"Erm...i mean no..." Peter murmured in confusion.
(im bored and cant focus my mind right know, ill be back later perhaps...)
Subject: big pink eraser


Author:
James who likes the color pink
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Date Posted: 12:36:25 03/31/03 Mon

"NOO! WAIT! DON'T!" Shrub yelled, diving for the eraser. Maddi quickly picked up the notebook and erased Shrub's name so that only "Sh" remained. Shrub fell to the ground, missing his arms and legs and a giant hole in his torso.

Chrissy and Lauren joined in with more erasers, erasing everything that had to do with the Shrub. When the had finished, only a small piece of pink fuz remained.
Subject: boo


Author:
Sirius
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Date Posted: 06:06:41 03/31/03 Mon

with a malicious grin, Maddi ran over to their sacred Math Teacher and pulled him along behind her, away from the notebook.

"Noooo! I rule all! I am in command!" he howled, fighting away from them.

At that moment, some of his graying hair peeled away to expose the head beneath.

"It's the Shrub!" they cried.

"yes, it is me." he drawled back.

"Then where's Mr. Kopas?" Maddi asked, confused.

miles and miles away, Mr. Kopas was sitting on the moon with a cup of tea. He grinned widely and watched the stars.

Maddi hung her head. "I think we have a very big mess to clean up." she announced, and produced from her pocket...a very big pink eraser!
Subject: monkey


Author:
Peter
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Date Posted: 05:15:58 03/31/03 Mon

"There's no place like home, there's no place like home." Chels repeated as she rocked back and forth on the muddy ground, "Darn! How come it worked for Dorathy and not for me!?!?"
"Dare i remind you that that was a movie envolving a talking scarecrow, talking lion, a tin man, and a lady getting killed by a house falling on her???" Chrissy muttered.
"Don't bother, she thinks it's real..." lauren said.
Subject: o my god! maddi...


Author:
fufu
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Date Posted: 05:09:05 03/31/03 Mon

Lauren let out a war whoop and fired her crossbow and the oncoming demons. "I'll get em....get em all!" she kept muttering.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" screamed the others as the demonic creatures decended on LAuren. "DON'T EAT THE FUFU!!"
Subject: mwhahahahahaw!


Author:
Sirius
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Date Posted: 05:06:34 03/31/03 Mon

Maddi grabbed Fufu's arm and pulled her forcibly away from the bunnies. She had been standing in front of them, weilding a plastic crossbow that she had stolen from Hagrid and a very sharp stick. Chrissy ran up and helped drag her away from the potentially heroic battle.

"Oh my God!" Chels cried, grabbing Peter's trank gun and rapidly shooting down bunnies and humans alike.

"Chelsea! Stop it! Chels! Back away from the massacre!" Maddi and Chels yelled. Mr. Kopas regained consiousness and slung Chels over his shoulder, running away. She was still pouring trank darts into the oncoming bunnies as they retreated.

Suddenly, all the bunnies turned into flesh-eating monsters that were twice as tall as the Marauders, editors, and math teacher the same. All eyes turned to Maddi, who was sitting on the floor with a stick, words scribbled onto the ground in front of her.

"What did you do?!" Chrissy screamed, running faster.

"I got rid of the bunnies! This is much, much better!" Maddi assured her.

"I fail to see our advantage now!" Chels yelled, discovering that her trank darts weren't working on the horrendous creatures.

"Well, for one, we're...we;ve..." Maddi sped up with a burst of adreneline. "Cool, I can't run this fast at home."

Mr. Kopas looked up from the notebook, his inked scribblings peering out at everyone from the page. He let out an evil cackle, scaring the editors senseless.

"I am in control now, weaklings!"
Subject: yeow


Author:
Peter
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Date Posted: 08:23:43 03/30/03 Sun

"Oh brother." Peter sighed at the mess that lay before him. There were people dropping into unconscienceness(is that a word?) right and left.
Within a few moments the battle was over, unconscience bunnies and humans strewn across the relatively small battlefield.
"It's like some horrible massacre..." Maddi murmured. The others just stared in horror at what they had done.
But just when they were certain that they had won the fight a pink bunny regained cosciousness(sp?). He looked at his arm, where a trank dart was imbedded, and pulled the dart out with his teeth. Soon other bunnies did the same and before you can say 'Microsoft Encarta Encyclopedia 2000' Shrub had his army of rabid bunnies back. Someone among the teens screamed. And there was an ordered retreat.
So the editors and Marauders, burdened with an unconsious(sp?) Mr. Kopas ran back to their 'base'.
"Now what?" James asked.
"Another attack?" Chels offered.
"What would that do? Make them more angry?" Lauren replied.
"Well what are we going to do? Let him take over the fictional world?" Maddi asked.
"No! Please no! We already have Voledemort to worry about we don't need deranged plant life to add to the list!" Lupin protested.
"How bout we shoot him back to the moon?" Chrissy offered.
"No that didn't work last time." SIrius dismissed.
"Well you people are magic, can't you use some sort of paralysis spell or something?" Lauren asked.
"But that's illegal." Peter murmured.
"Do i need to remind you of the extremes of this situation?" Chrissy inquired.
"You're right, we need to stop this bush-erm Shrub."James agreed.
Subject: awww... no more fun?


Author:
James is sorry for how he posted
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Date Posted: 19:20:35 03/29/03 Sat

(ur right. he thinks hes doin the right thing, so we'll cut him some slack. sorry... i got a LITTLE carried away.)

"Right..." said Maddi as they approached the hoard of bunnies.

Mr. Kopas' face brightned as he saw them. "Hey over here!" he called, to the other's dissmay. The bunnies turned on them and began to hop their way.

"OPEN FIRE!" commanded James, and a barrage of darts rained down on the pick fluff-balls.

Mr. Kopas absent-mindedly ran directly into the shower and was hit, falling into the growing heap of unconcious bunnies.

"AHH! Mr. Kopas!" Chelsea cried, running after him. Sirius grabbed her and yanked her back. "You dolt! Want to end up like him? Besides, he's only knocked out, I think."

James, Remus, and Peter were having a harder time with the guns than the girls, considering they had never even seen one before, let alone use one.

Peter shakily collided with Remus after feeling the recoil of the first shot. Remus' gun turned and hit James, who nearly shot Chrissy. Luckily Chrissy ducked before the dart could hit her.

The dart instead hit the oncomming Snape, who had with him Cara and Lily.
Subject: greeeeeeeeeeen


Author:
Peter
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Date Posted: 19:04:49 03/29/03 Sat

(here's a note--He's not exactly an evil man...we shouldn't make him a monster! I think this may be a step too far...)

"Wait!" Chels and Maddi called, they both put out a hand to stop the marching soldiers, "Is this the way you want to be remembered? British people and schools are awesome! There is no need for fighting, here have the notebook."
"What are you guys doing?" Mr. Kopas exclaimed, but then he noticed the two identical notebooks that the girls held.
"Choose one!" Maddi yelled.
"One? But why not two?" a soldier asked.
"Cause that wouldn't be fair." James said.
"Oh... okay the one on the right." Shrub replied.
"Oh...which right, yours or mine?" Chels asked.
"What's the difference?!?" Shrub exclaimed.
"Right...here, take this one, hell take both." Chels threw both of them on the ground and started running. All the children managed to escape to the decrepid old house, but Mr. Kopas was trapped by the soldiers, who turned into fluffy pink bunnies as Chrissy pulled out the real notebook and scribbled down the words.
"Oh no! We've got to save him!" lauren exclaimed.
"I still don't know who he is." Lupin muttered.
"OUR MATH TEACHER!" the editors screamed.
"Why is he so important?" Sirius asked, still not understanding why these strange American girls were so in love with math.
"Cause he's a great teacher!" Lauren yelled.
"Oh...like Dumbledor and the late Proffesor Jazzerous?" Lilly asked.
"Sure." Maddi replied.
"Now, what's the plan?" Chels asked, suddenly they all turned into military camoflauge fateges, "Heh, that's better."
"What's my rank?" asked Peter stupidly.
"Who cares? We don't have time for that. How bout we pretend we live in an Otonomous Collective?" Maddi offered.
"Do we ahve real guns?"Chels asked, searching around her outfit. Lauren came up to her and took the trank gun out of Chels' haulster.
"WE have trank guns, YOU do not." Lauren muttered.
"We can't trust you with loaded weapons of any sort." Chrissy agreed. She passed out more trank guns to the Marauders.
Meanwhile one large pink bunny was sniffing Mr. Kopas' ear.
"Ew! Get away! This is a direct violation of the Geniva Convention! I demand to speak with my lawyer!" Mr. Kopas complained. The bunny frowned and growled. (the geniva convention i think was the agreement to treat all prisoners humainly)
"Lets move in soldiers!" Peter exclaimed. James and Sirius walked carefully towards him removing his tank gun cautiosly.
"Could you please step over there with the other hazard?"Lupin asked.
"Aw...we're not hazards, we're specail." Chels wined.
Subject: better run


Author:
James the very very giddy Britian
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Date Posted: 18:43:45 03/29/03 Sat

An evil cackle erupted from the hallway. In stalked the Shrub, holding Lauren's thick black notebook. He pushed his way through the thick line of soilders crammed into the small space of hallway they occupied and stumbled in to the front. He straightned his tie and looked at the children.

"Wait, how'd you get that?" demanded Lauren.

"Well, as I sat there on the moon, I looked up and saw this little black book float past me. I knew what it was after i read it a bit. I read some of the other stories, too. Quite disturbing, actually. You know yound lady," he pointed at Lauren, "I have the power to commit you!"

Lauren nearly bit Shrub, after she lunged at him, but the many US military gaurds jumped in front of her, pushing her back with their guns.

Lauren, instead, turned to Chels. "Where exactly did you send our books when you made them disappear?" she asked, trying to control her anger.

"Ummm... outer space?" she replied innocently.

Shrub cackled again. "Now I have the power to do what I wish with this accursed British school and story!"

Chrissy leaped up and pointed at the entry wildly. "Shrub its your dad!" she cried.

"Where?" everyone cired out. Shrub spun around, dropping the note book. The soilders brook into a salute. Chrissy ran up and grabbed the note book.

"Ah ha! Your stupider than I expected!" she called out as the rest of the editors and marauders cackled.

Shrub grew very red, as did the rest of the US military for being tricked.

Shrub pointed at the group and commanded "GET THEM AND BRING ME THAT NOTEBOOK! IN ONE PIECE!" The military raced foward almost instantly.
Subject: niner


Author:
Peter
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Date Posted: 18:23:40 03/29/03 Sat

"So great, now that we're trapped in a fictional world now what?!?" Lauren exclaimed.
"And i hadn't written Sean Connery in yet..."Chels muttered and her friends glared at her while Mr. Kopas shot her a disturbed 'are you entirely alright?' look. Chels realised she had said it aloud and backed away sheepishly.
Suddenly American military soldiers appeared with a POOF.
"Gah!" Chrissy exclaimed.
"What the-" Sirius muttered.
"Oh no, the worst has happened," James yelled over the drill sergeant, "Shrub is in control of the story!!!"
And the whole group of Marauders, editors, and Mr. Kopas screamed knowing that this was a total nightmare.
Subject: hmmmm what now???


Author:
James the sleepy dwarf
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Date Posted: 16:09:59 03/29/03 Sat

The marauders stared on blankly at the chaos around them. Mr Kopas was comforting a hysterical Maddi while Chels Fufu and Chrissy were trying to put out a flaming computer. Sirius started laughing, and James slugged him. Remus pointed his wand at the ball of flames being kicked around like a soccer ball and put it out with a jet of water. Peter and Cara just stared.
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