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Date Posted: Sat, Nov 08 2003, 7:06:09
Author: Squirrelly
Subject: Re: You asked for it!
In reply to: Shy Lurker of the ominous looks 's message, "You asked for it!" on Fri, Nov 07 2003, 20:33:34

>Okay, now on with Voyager:
>
>Tom lay quietly sobbing in Chakotay's strong,
>protective arms, still not believing his incredible
>luck. That after all that abuse he had to go through -
>first by the hard, loveless hand of his father, then
>by the inmates in prison, who couldn't resist his
>flawless beauty - it was so very sweet to be loved,
>perhaps for the first time in his whole life. Even if
>they had to hide their newfound love from the vengeful
>women who still held them in their clutches. Torres
>was bad enough, as she would broke their neck in a fit
>of murderous Klingon temper, but Janeway was a lot
>worse. If they wanted to stay alive, they had to keep
>hiding.

Oh. My. Goodness. That was so very....godawful. *shudder* I feel obligated somehow to try and top that. Then I'm going to read some of my friend Kim's fic to get the filthy taste out of my mouth. Blech. Anyway, here goes:

"The doctor frowned at harry, as he looked at the padd. "doc whats wronge (a/n: *snerk*) with me???" hary gulped anxously. "nothing that wont be cured in nine months" said the doctor "harry u are going to have a baby!" then harry cried and cried. "when can i tell tom-he is the father after all" harry said. "im afraid not" said the doctor. "neelix is the father, u little space-ho"

And for Round Two:

"Janeway reflected to herself that it was a good thing they had Ensign Whipple on the bridge that day. After she single-handedly fought off ten attacking Kazon warriors, the beautiful half-betazoid with luminous purple eyes had performed first aid on all the injured officers. Who knew you could do a tracheotomy with a hyperspanner? Janeway thought Harry would understand if she promoted Whipple to lieutenant first."

Here, have another:

"When the aliens demanded that Janeway and Chakotay have sex in public in exchange for dilithium, they were shocked. Inwardly, however, they were only too eager to get it on."

What the heck, here's one for the road:

"Tuvok knew that the only logical thing to do was reveal his burning desire for Neelix. He looked through the computer databases, pondering the most efficient way to tell the studly Talaxian of his true feelings. Talent Night was coming up soon, and he just <i>knew</i> there was a song out there that would help him express himself. Then, something caught his eye. A late 20th century song by Bette Midler called "The Wind Beneath My Wings." <i>Perfect</i>, thought the Vulcan.

Okay, going to go wash my mind out with bleach.

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