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Date Posted: Sat, Nov 15 2003, 20:10:53
Author: AnneRosesEvilTwin
Subject: "Enterprise" howlers

This isn't the gaffiest story I ever saw, but some of the prose made me laugh out loud:

<a rel=nofollow target=_blank href="http://www.fanfiction.net/read.php?storyid=938759">http://www.fanfiction.net/read.php?storyid=938759</a>

Who says Archer is wimpy? Um, isn't his bedside techinique in sickbay sexual harrassment?
--
Striding into Sickbay Archer laid Hoshi on a bio bed. Phlox was right behind him, scanning the back of her neck, clucking at the readings on his med scanner.


Later, the alien comes aboard and airs some of Hoshi's dirty linen--literally:
---
"Don't tell me you never mentioned me!" Ravis laughed, working his jaw back and forth. "We met on Risa, my dear Captain. Hoshi and I came to know each other very well, if you know what I mean." He laughed again at Malcolm's expression. "A jealous rival? She's quite an armful isn't she? We barely got any sleep that night! Tell me, has she ever worn that green set for you? The matching bra and . thong, was it? Although I don't know how it could be called underwear, being mostly just a few scraps of lace!"

--
Luckily Hoshi gets back at the boys. This is where her extensive communications training really came in handy:
--
"Hoshi, you weren't . intimate with him on Risa, were you?" Disbelief threaded Malcolm's voice.

"Come off it Malcolm." Hoshi looked at the Lieutenant, scorn dripping from her voice. "Like you and Trip weren't trolling for a piece of alien ass yourselves." Contempt marred her face. "What ever did happen to your clothes?"

Malcolm and Archer's jaws dropped at the vitriol oozing from Hoshi.

--
I sure hope they have a mop in the sickbay closet. Someone could have a serious slip & fall over there.

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