| Subject: He and Susie may now become your bestest friends |
Author:
Beth
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Date Posted: 14:53:10 08/22/06 Tue
Author Host/IP: AC91B2D0.ipt.aol.com/172.145.178.208
In reply to:
Christine
's message, "A little bit too funny..." on 13:22:38 08/22/06 Tue
because they know you need the support. It may work out great for you, lol!
I know what you mean. Once when I was in my 20's a coworker asked me why I wasn't married, and if I wasn't worried about not having kids despite being SO old (like 28). I told her that I came from a dysfunctional family, and, not wanting to repeat that experience, it would take someone darned special to make me ever want to be married.
She immediately started going off on me...about how EVERYONE has dysfunctional families and how she was so tired of hearing people talk about it as if it was something special for them.
Here's her dysfunction: her dad won't dance. Honest to GOD! Her parents are wealthy. She grew up in an upper-middle class home, had the best education. Family holidays and vacations. They gave her rental property when she was still a kid...then paid her downpayment on a 3 bedroom ranch house when she was 20. Her parents are still married and happy together. Neither has any substance abuse problems and, according to her, they're faithful to each other. They paid for a humdinger of a wedding for her. $25,000 dress. That should give you an idea. And, as a wedding present they went in with the groom's family to give them a downpayment to have a new home built.
I am deadly serious when I say that her total understanding of dysfunction was that her dad refused to dance with her mom at her wedding reception. She went on and on about how screwed up her family is and how much this ruined her wonderful day.
I thought, "Honey, you ain't SEEN dysfunction!" Since then I don't even mention my family. People don't understand. Once or twice when someone pressed I would give examples, and each time they told me I was exagerating. Yep, that's me. Nah, we never had to get a neighbor to drive us around all day Saturday...between Canon City, Florence, and Penrose, because once again my stepfather had been so drunk that he lost the car. Nah, my mother never hauled us kids with her when she did a Carrie Nation on a bar. Nah, we never had a car of strangers pull up out front, screech to a stop, open a door, and roll my stepfather out onto the front lawn, then take off. Nah, I never spent a night picking peas out of green shag carpeting because my stepfather had come home drunk yet again and my mother threw dinner at him before taking off for God knows where. Those things don't really happen in real life, and anyone who says they do must be a liar.
Wouldn't it be nice to live in such a tidy little universe that you can't imagine that whole families can be totally crazy?! I think it's great that you and Robert have escaped your family's behavior patterns. Your family is lucky that you let them have anything to do with your kids!!!
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