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Date Posted: 05:46:23 05/25/05 Wed
Author: bfny
Subject: sorry to hear about Andrew
In reply to: Lawshark 's message, "Back again just to say..." on 17:53:11 05/24/05 Tue

First - thanks, I appreciate your words. Second...

Keep doing what you're doing and I bet it all works out with Andrew. It's heartening to hear that you are combining both the expertise of professionals in the field with your thoughts on what would be helpful as parents. I sometimes worry that parents cede the decision-making process totally to outside people when it is them that know their children best and it is their actions that their children take their cues from. Kids are amazing at being able to sense when things aren't right and they don't react well to parents who are not being true to themselves. I find it to be a significant problem in the liberal area where I live. I think kids get overdiagnosed when they don't act within a narrow range of what is considered normal development.

If Andrew is wired differently, well it's probably part blessing; part curse. The curse is that it makes it a bit more work for the parents as he may need a bit more in the way of discipline, attention and patience from you - and finding the right mix will be a constant struggle. But it can be a blessing in that, if you concentrate on meeting his needs and don't go overboard in making him conform to what is considered that narrow range of societally acceptable performance - and I'm sure you won't - then he is apt to develop into a wonderful, thoughtful, sensitive, creative adult of whom you and Laura will both be extremely proud.

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