<i> On my own..pretending he's beside me... </i> -- Realistic Dreams: The Present : The Beach

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Date Posted: 22:08:09 07/09/03 Wed
Author: Kayleigh
Subject: On my own..pretending he's beside me...

Mike had Daniella for the night, so she was free to do whatever she wanted, though there wasn't much she wanted to do. A soft sigh escaped her parted lips as she absently played in the sand, trying to get out some of the feelings that were plaguing her.

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he needed to take a walk...get some fresh air and try to straighten out his thoughts. His lips pursed a moment as he tossed the Quiksilver t-shirt back into the car and wandered down the beach...the night was sticky, hot and just all around miserable but he needed to get out (NT) -- Reed, 22:10:10 07/09/03 Wed
She was feeling the same things, stretched out on the sand with just cut off shorts and a bikini top on. Her hair was down around her jaw, her gaze closed as she enjoyed a quiet breeze. (NT) -- Kayleigh, 22:11:48 07/09/03 Wed
his head was ducked a bit, eyes closed as he wandered aimlessly down the beach in a staight line, as straight as any man could walk, kicking up sand with each step. His life was far to confusing for even him...he wanted to just fall asleep and leave himself for awhile...get away and be normal again (NT) -- Reed, 22:13:54 07/09/03 Wed
She looked up as she heard someone coming, and quickly stood. "Sorry." She murmured, not looking at the person, just getting out of their way. (NT) -- Kayleigh, 22:14:47 07/09/03 Wed
he raised his head at the voice, the pale sunset casting a slight glow across features...a frown marring them. Its...Um My fault he bit his lip a minute, just now glancing at the women Kayleigh... (NT) -- Reed, 22:17:59 07/09/03 Wed
She looked up, her brow furrowed when she saw him. "yeah..." She didn't know what to say to him, at a loss for the moment. (NT) -- Kayleigh, 22:19:11 07/09/03 Wed
he shifted a bit, leaning his weight more on one foot and sinking a bit into the sand Hey it was all he could really say...just studying her for the moment...she didn't look any different (NT) -- Reed, 22:21:45 07/09/03 Wed
She did look a little different, more grown up now then she had been before. "Hi..." She murmured, closing her eyes so she wouldn't look at him. (NT) -- Kayleigh, 22:24:33 07/09/03 Wed
he glanced around a moment...raiseing a brow Wheres...Daniella? his voice was a bit soft today...Samantha had even noticed the difference (NT) -- Reed, 22:27:13 07/09/03 Wed
She sighed softly, drawing in the sand. "She's with Mike." Her brother was the only male figure in the little girls life... (NT) -- Kayleig, 22:28:09 07/09/03 Wed
he moved to drop beside her, drawing his knees up a bit and wrapping arms loosely around them...he had to talk to someone...he thought a bit with his words...starting and then stopping a moment later before finally figureing out what he wanted to say How is he...your brother? (NT) -- Reed, 22:32:18 07/09/03 Wed
"he's alright, way protective of Daniella, she's his baby." She shrugged a little bit. "He was engaged, but they broke up." (NT) -- Kayleigh, 22:33:12 07/09/03 Wed
he moved to lean back on his palms, a quick change of subject...the whole engagement issue was the part that was getting to him Do...you ever think about what It would have been like if....you wouldn't have gotten pregnant? he had...so many times. He bit his lip, brows raiseing as he turned to glance at her (NT) -- Reed, 22:35:46 07/09/03 Wed
"Of course, all the time." She laughed, shrugging her shoulders a little again. "Getting pregant changed my life Reed, it wasn't like what it was for you. You could just pretend it didn't happen, I had to carry her for nine months, I had to deal with everyone look at me like I was a whore, I had go through 12 hours of labour to have her, I had to stay up all night, give up all my friends to take care of her..." She shrugged again. "if I had gotten pregnant, my life would be completely different." (NT) -- Kayleigh, 22:37:41 07/09/03 Wed
he sighed audibly, looking back to his feet a moment I just wish I could have been there with you..instead of just meeting her one day when she is almost 3 be the proud dad he wanted to be. He wanted to be able to say 'Yeah...I was there to help her walk and feed her and hear her first words' but he couldn't...he wasn't there when all that happened (NT) -- Reed, 22:41:15 07/09/03 Wed
"Yeah me too, wasn't easy going through by myself, but you would have gotten into a lot of trouble." (NT) -- Kayleigh, 22:42:51 07/09/03 Wed
and then there was always that point as well When we were together some nights..I used to wish that you were just a little bit older so we didn't have to hide it he laughed a bit at that...He'd never told anyone that. He did love her but now he was confused as to if he still was (NT) -- Reed, 22:45:50 07/09/03 Wed
She smiled a little, shrugging. "No use in what if's right?" She chanced a glance over at him, her gaze a little nervous. (NT) -- Kayleigh, 22:49:32 07/09/03 Wed
he returned her smile a bit...nodding Yeah...No use he had to break the news to her somehow, he couldn't keep it a secret Hey...Can I ask you something? (NT) -- Reed, 22:53:40 07/09/03 Wed
She nodded a little, looking over at him. "Sure." (NT) -- Kayleigh, 22:54:29 07/09/03 Wed
he tilted his head back, sighing What....if I told you that Samantha was...he paused a moment, studying her reaction now pregnant? (NT) -- Reed, 22:56:43 07/09/03 Wed
She was quiet for a long moment before she let out a soft, "congratulations." she didn't know what to say. (NT) -- Kayleigh, 22:57:35 07/09/03 Wed
he let out a soft sigh of relief at her anwser, somewhere in the back of his mind he'd expected her to take it a lot worse. He didn't know what to say to her...it was so awkward now between them and he hated the feeling of not being able to carry out a normal conversation (NT) -- Reed, 23:00:26 07/09/03 Wed
She sighed softly, trying to fight the feelings of anger and jealousy.It wasn't fair that this new baby would have him there from the start, and her beautiful baby girl didn't even know who her father was. (NT) -- Kayleigh, 23:01:41 07/09/03 Wed
he shifted a but uncomfortably with the silence and watched her. I can take Daniella any time you need...maybe she could learn who her dad is? (NT) -- Reed, 23:04:11 07/09/03 Wed
Her brow furrowed, shrugging again. "I've never had anyone watch her other then Mike.." She was a little nervous around it all. "I don't think I want her 'round your fiance to much." (NT) -- Kayleigh, 23:06:05 07/09/03 Wed
again a frown creased handsome features Then maybe I could come see her? his voice was questioning slightly, brows raises again (NT) -- Reed, 23:07:43 07/09/03 Wed
"That could work." She spoke softly, her gaze out at the waves. "Mike has her a lot, you could see her with him too." (NT) -- Kayleigh, 23:08:45 07/09/03 Wed
he shook his head at her suggestion Not with Mike...with you saying Mike has suspicions about who the father is and her looking so much like me...it might cause some problems (NT) -- Reed, 23:11:18 07/09/03 Wed
She shrugged. "I am of age now, nothin' he can do." She dribbled sand onto her bare leg. (NT) -- Kayleigh, 23:12:36 07/09/03 Wed
he watched her still, somewhat in awe of her for being able to take this on by herself. He didn't know what to say, but he was thinking on it for the moment The night he came to my apartment...he asked me where you were right after you ran out and asked if we'd ever done anything...and I lied to him, I said no and if he found out now I'd lose one of the best friends I'd ever had (NT) -- Reed, 23:17:14 07/09/03 Wed
She shrugged. "It doesn't matter what you do, I wouldn't want to inconvience your life at all." Her voice was sarcastic, her arms tight around her knee's. (NT) -- Kayleigh, 23:19:40 07/09/03 Wed
he shook his head, a deeper frown then before I just don't want to lose him he stopped a moment pursing his lips and tilting his head And I don't want to lose you He still did love her, yes but he was stuck between a rock and a hard place on this...Samantha being the rock and Kayeligh being the hard place. (NT) -- Reed, 23:23:52 07/09/03 Wed
She sighed softly, looking down at the sand. Her voice was incredably sad as she spoke. "You let me go a long time ago." (NT) -- Kayleigh, 23:25:47 07/09/03 Wed
his gaze was trained on her, not wavering And I let go a big part of me she practically taken his heart with her when she'd gone back to florida and Samantha had almost filled that hole..but there was still just that one little part that only she could fill (NT) -- Reed, 23:28:53 07/09/03 Wed
She sighed softly, looking over to him, her brow raised. "Then why didn't you at least call, a letter, something..." When she had been in labour she had cried out for him. (NT) -- Kayleigh, 23:30:14 07/09/03 Wed
he still had a stack of letters that were in envelopes, stamped and ready to be sent but every time he got near the mail box he had chickened out and shoved them back into his desk Because...I figured If I had gotten in contact with you then it would have just made it harder on us being hundreds...thousands of miles away and not seeing each other. Phone calls and letters didn't seem like enough...nothing did (NT) -- Reed, 23:33:37 07/09/03 Wed
"It would have been better then nothing, I dreamnt about you for a year every single night." She shook her head. "I was such a dumb kid, everytime the phone rang, I was hoping it was you..." (NT) -- Kayleigh, 23:34:43 07/09/03 Wed
he looked away a moment, running a hand over his jaw I looked through the mail at least twice every day hoping I had gotten something from you he raised a brow And I still dream about you sometimes (NT) -- Reed, 23:37:27 07/09/03 Wed
She sighed softly, stretching out long tan legs in front of her as she gazed at him with bright brown eyes. "What do you dream?" (NT) -- Kayleigh, 23:39:32 07/09/03 Wed
he leaned back on his palms...watching the water That you still lived with me...and things were normal again. It was that simple...every night was the same dream, over and over and he never had gotten tired of it (NT) -- Reed, 23:43:33 07/09/03 Wed
She looked over at him, sighing softly. "Do you know how badly I ached to feel your arms around me? When I was having Dani, I cried for you the whole time..." (NT) -- Kayleigh, 23:44:43 07/09/03 Wed
he ducked his head Some nights when Im sitting with Samantha or something I just can't stand it...I just want to get as far away from her as possible just because she isn't you (NT) -- Reed, 23:47:20 07/09/03 Wed
She sighed softly, her hand going to his bicep lightly. "How can you sleep next to her when your dreaming of me?" (NT) -- Kayleigh, 23:48:33 07/09/03 Wed
he shifted a bit... Most of the time I wake up and go to your old room and then I just can't sleep the rest of the night because it reminds me so much of you (NT) -- Reed, 23:51:04 07/09/03 Wed
"So is that all we are Reed? Just memories?" She looked over at him, a soft sigh escaping her parted, prettily glossed lips. (NT) -- Kayleigh, 23:52:11 07/09/03 Wed
he shook his head More then memories...he sighed a bit, ducking his head again (NT) -- Reed, 23:55:47 07/09/03 Wed
"'What are we then?" She questioned, her gaze searching his as her hand lifted his face to look at her. (NT) -- Kayleigh, 23:58:40 07/09/03 Wed
his hand covered hers a moment...sighing a bit In love his anwser was hopeful as he pressed a kiss to her palm (NT) -- Reed, 00:00:48 07/10/03 Thu
She watched him, her eyes full of emotion, and close to tears. "It's not that easy though....we haven't seen each other for three years, and your...your practically married...and she's having your baby..." (NT) -- Kayleigh, 00:03:00 07/10/03 Thu
he sighed a bit into her hand, closing his eyes a moment...he wished it could be that easy...just to start all over again. He couldn't say anything..all he could do was hold her and that he did...he reached out..taking her into his arms (NT) -- Reed, 00:05:39 07/10/03 Thu
She cuddled against him, her head resting against his chest. They still fit together perfectly, she was semi-amazed by that.... (NT) -- Kayleigh, 00:08:15 07/10/03 Thu
he sighed a bit agenst her hair, a hand making small circles across her back..taking in her familure scent God I missed you Kayleigh (NT) -- Reed, 00:09:58 07/10/03 Thu
"I missed you too..." She smiled a little, looking up at him. "I'm all grown up now...and we have a perfect little girl..she's so sweet Reed." (NT) -- kayleigh, 00:11:04 07/10/03 Thu
his lips pursed a moment, forming into a soft smile Yeah...we do don't we? he felt as if he'd had every part of him back now...he felt whole again somehow and just wanted to sit there with her (NT) -- Reed, 00:14:41 07/10/03 Thu
"She talks so well already and she loves to play, she's just so happy about everything..." She smiled a little, thinking about their little girl. (NT) -- Kayleigh, 00:16:17 07/10/03 Thu
he pressed a kiss to her forehead, a wider smile on features I saw her the other day...and she looked content with that puppy..and she looked like she was ready to take on the world they'd made her and that was one thing that made him proud...his daughter, he could now say that it was his daughter (NT) -- Reed, 00:19:09 07/10/03 Thu
She nodded. smiling as she reached up to gently kiss his cheek. "I know, she's like that..." (NT) -- Kayleigh, 00:22:47 07/10/03 Thu
he grinned a bit, his hand still rubbing small circles across her back Milo still lives with me...you should see the kid. I made him all big and fat and now he just lays there like a bump (NT) -- Reed, 00:24:38 07/10/03 Thu
She laughed lightly, looking up at him. "You live somewhere different now don't you?" (NT) -- Kayleigh, 00:26:09 07/10/03 Thu
he shook his head, chewing at the inside of his lip a moment. He couldn't bring himself to get rid of the apartment after he'd moved out and it worked out well because he ended up moving back into it Same apartment as the one you lived in he smiled a bit (NT) -- Reed, 00:27:56 07/10/03 Thu
She nodded. "I have to find somewhere to live soon, Dani really needs more space..." (NT) -- Kayleigh, 00:29:19 07/10/03 Thu
he ran a hand through her hair a moment, ruffling it playfully I can help you look if you want.. (NT) -- Reed, 00:30:47 07/10/03 Thu
She smiled up at him. "It has to be...way, way cheap. It's hard to work full time, cuz I don't like to keep her in daycares..." (NT) -- Kayleigh, 00:31:47 07/10/03 Thu
he shook his head I refuse to let you live in some run down apartment that smalls like cat piss and such...I'll help you pay for it He had allot of his parents money saved away still that no one really know about, so no one would really know if it was missing (NT) -- Reed, 00:34:23 07/10/03 Thu
She frowned, shaking her head. "I doubt your fiancee would appreciate you giving away money." She admonished, though her fingers were slowly trailing down his arm - remembering all the wild nights (NT) -- Kayleigh, 00:35:34 07/10/03 Thu
he raised a brow Mike never told you I was spoiled rotten did he? he laughed a bit playfully She doesn't know about the money my parents gave me when I graduated..I haven't really had anything to use it for so it has just been sitting there (NT) -- Reed, 00:37:17 07/10/03 Thu
(NT) -- Opps, 00:37:51 07/10/03 Thu
She sighed softly, before looking up at him. "Maybe...Maybe you can come visit me..once I get this new place..." (NT) -- Kayleigh, 00:38:42 07/10/03 Thu
a crooked smile graced handsome features and he nodded a bit No doubt he missed their wild nights...with samantha it was either gentle or nothing but with her he could just let loose, they both just let loose with each other (NT) -- Reed, 00:41:43 07/10/03 Thu

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