| Subject: to answer your question |
Author:
Lashana
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Date Posted: 02/22/05 6:10:28pm Tue
"So what made you come back now? And just why did you leave in the first place? Why leave without a goodbye or a reason given?" He asked softly.
She could hear the edge in Cyrus' voice and mentally shook her head. From the questions he was angry that she'd left and sighing softly she began to answer them.
"Why did I leave in the first place is the easiest to answer. You know what the Weave is so I don't need to explain it I'm sure. What you may or may not know is that without it this world would die. Eleven years ago people were using the Weave like it was some sort of cure-all, a tool that could fix anything or be manipulated to destroy anything and what those people didn't realize is that by misusing the Weave as they were doing it was tearing it apart."
Looking down at Yomi she brushed away the crystaline tear tracks from her cheeks before continuing.
"The last thing I recall doing was fighting a woman who called herself Prophet and Janai and.. I lost. I was moved to.. I think.... Tiani's home while I was unconscious. I was sleeping and the Weave began to wail and I didn't think about it at all, I just jumped into the heart of the Weave to fix it.... to protect everything I loved most. When I left I didn't think it would take me eleven years to fix it and it's still not done."
Lifting her head so Cyrus could see the pain she'd been through at knowing what she'd done, the agony she'd caused she continued,
"Why did I leave without a goodbye or a reason given? Let me SHOW you..... so you can see just what I was fighting to save."
That was the only warning she gave Cyrus before she touched his thoughts, showing him exactly what she'd seen when she first left. She also drew in Yomi, to let her see and understand what she might be called on to deal with. When Lashana died the Guardianship of the Weave would fall to her... by the Weave's own choice. To Lashana it appeared as a tapestry, one that was ripped and torn and frayed along it's edges. A closer look would show what each tear in the fabric was causing... floods, hurricanes, blizzards and tidal waves, drought, earthquakes, and mudslides. The sound that surrounded her was that of cries of fear, of pain, of death and it was an aching buzz in her ears that wouldn't let up. The scent of decay filled her nostrils, a harbinger of what was to come if this wasn't fixed. What had been torn had to be mended, the frayed edges rewoven and the holes patched and all of it took energy. She'd started to spin out herself to fix it, to heal the damage that was growing before finally, unconsciously she'd shut off access to the Weave, blocking all but the barest of contacts to anyone else.
The memory ended and she looked at her son for a moment before she resumed her explanation. She kept an arm around Yomi's shoulders as spoke, her other hand lifting to touch the white streaks in her hair.
"I didn't "choose" to come back now.... when I started fixing the Weave I lost track of everything..... time, people.... even myself. If I'd had a choice I'd have returned to you the same day I left. When I came back I looked older than Myuler and the streaks you see? They're a reminder of what I gave up, what I lost to save you and Yomi and everyone else. Myuler gave me a gift that I can never repay.... he gave me a second chance to be with my family, to be with those I love. If Myuler hadn't done what he did.... all you'd see now is a withered old woman who looked and sounded nothing like me, a woman who was so close to death's door that Death herself had opened it and was beckoning me inside. I wish I could go back in time to be with you when you were growing. I missed so much..... and it's something I'll never ever get back again."
Lashana would understand if he was still angry with her ... she'd even understand if he hated her for leaving even knowing the reason behind it. If it had been her parent she would have stayed angry for a long time even knowing the reason before finally forgiving.... but that was her.
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