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Date Posted: 00:56:30 03/19/06 Sun
Author: Sunny
Subject: Part II
I really will think of a title someday. Here's the next part. I've got the story written, but I'm still tweaking the rest. Hope you enjoy it, at least a little. This is the first time I've ever tried my hand at this fan-fic thing... makes me nervous.
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Part II -- Sunny, 01:05:16 03/19/06 Sun [1]
Someone was knocking at my door. I turned over to look at the alarm clock. 9:00 on a Saturday morning. "Whoever that is had better be bleeding profusely or in some other danger," I grumbled as I rolled out of bed and pulled my robe on. Sleep in my eyes, hair standing on end; I padded to the front door of the small town-home I rented. "This had better be good," I stated groggily, opening the door.
"Good morning!" I could kill him.
"Keith, do you know what time it is?!"
"9a.m. on a beautiful August day," he said, grinning.
"Morning people suck… and it’s raining." I told him, sounding extremely unenthusiastic… and who could blame me? It was the perfect day for sleeping late and I’m awoken at 9AM on a Saturday by a morning-loving, coffee-wielding, way-too-happy-for-this-time-of-day-when-it’s-raining, Aussie.
"Yes, but we also bring coffee," he replied, sticking out a Starbucks cup (he's obsessed), "and donuts." He's obsessed... and he knows me WAY too well.
"What exactly made you decide that I needed to be awake so early?" I asked, stepping aside so that he could come in.
"I have time off and I want to spend it with my friend..."
"Uh huh..."
"...And I also need a date for the CMAs."
"I should have known better than to think you’d bring me donuts and not want something,” I stated sarcastically. “I thought your mum was coming over," I continued, taking a drink of coffee, "This is good."
"Glad you like it. And she is, but I can have two guests and was hoping you’d join us," he stated matter-of-factly, smiling at me. If I didn't love him so much, I'd have to kill him for being so happy at this hour.
"Oh," He had only ever asked me to attend an awards show with him once before, and I ended up with the flu two days prior and couldn't go.
"So..."
O God... those eyes. Who can say no to those eyes? "Of course I’ll go." I can’t very well let my best friend down, now can I?
"Fantastic," he said, smiling and hugging me. He smelled good.
"You smell good." I’ve really got to stop thinking out loud.
"So I hear," he chuckled. I rolled my eyes and sat down in a chair at my kitchen table. It was nice having him home. He'd been on tour since June with no time off to speak of. I didn't ever realize how much I missed talking to him in person (instead of over the phone, which was a daily occurrence) until he was here.
"Hello... Earth to Hope..."
"Huh?"
He laughed, "You awake over there?"
"Yeah... just thinking..." I answered, resting my head in my hands.
"I see - everything ok?"
"Yeah, fine, just a little sleepy." He tilted his head and studied me for a minute.
"Ok. So what are your plans for the day?"
"I don't have any."
"Fantastic. How about we go to the store and get a few necessities for my empty house, rent some movies, then spend the day beings bums?"
"Fantastic? If I didn’t know you so well, I’d have to think I’d just been insulted.” I continued, “That's the best idea I've heard in a while, though. Lemme go shower and make myself half-presentable first."
"Yeah, you do kinda stink," he said, his eyes twinkling.
"Bite me, Koala Boy," I replied, laughing as I rose from my chair.
I walked to the bathroom to the sound of Keith singing as he made for my television. I showered quickly, then dried my hair and applied a little makeup before leaving the bathroom.
I slipped into my bedroom and dressed - tank top, jeans, sandals - then made my way back to the living-room, where I found Keith engrossed in my latest issue of Reader's Digest. "Good article?" I asked, sneaking up on him.
Keith jumped. "Good Lord woman, you nearly gave me a heart attack."
"A shame it didn't work," I responded, smiling.
"You know you love me."
"Yeah, you keep thinking that,” I laughed. “You ready?"
"When you are."
"Let's go then."
“Can I steal your magazine?” He was such a bookworm sometimes.
“Sure thing,” I answered as I grabbed my purse from the table next to the door - and we were on our way.
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"Bite me koala boy"!! I love it!! Keep it coming Sunny this is great. -- AussieChick, 02:04:57 03/19/06 Sun [1]
I have a feeling Keith is a morning person too. Don't really know why. He obviously loves his coffee but I think he is an 'early riser' so to speak!! LOL Maybe its a starting a new day fresh and living for the moment sort of thing.
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Why can't I have any friends that look like Keith? Actually, it's probably best that I don't...LOL! Great job, Sunny! I can't wait to hear more about this "friendship"... -- birdinflight, 16:45:27 03/19/06 Sun [1]
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Part III -- Sunny, 19:54:58 03/21/06 Tue [1]
It was still raining out late that evening as Keith and I sat chatting about my job. Well, ok, he was chatting, I was witching. My boss had become unbearable, but that’s another story. We had been silent for a few minutes, both lost in our own thoughts, when Keith suddenly jumped up off of the couch and took off running down the hallway. He was back moments later carrying a guitar, pen and paper, and his old tape recorder that I hadn’t managed to talk him into replacing yet. “Have an idea, did you?” I asked, apparently looking a little startled.
“Yeah. Stop looking at me like that.”
“Like what?”
“Like I’ve grown a second head.”
“Sorry,” I answered, laughing.
He stuck his tongue out at me and began to strum his guitar. I loved to watch him play. I’d known the man for over a decade and was still completely fascinated and amazed at his talent. And he had beautiful hands. The music stopped and pulled me out of my trance.
“You alright, Hope?” he asked.
“Yeah, just listening.” And with that, he went back to composing. An hour later he’d written an entire song – about relaxing rainy days after a hard week at work. Nice to know my crappy job was actually useful for something.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
“Hope, why don’t you just tell him?” I was on the phone with my wonderfully blunt twin sister, Holly.
“Are you out of your bloody mind?! I can’t tell him… I need to get over it.”
“You sound like a 12 year old.”
“Holly, he’s my best friend. I don’t want to lose that.”
“I know… but honey, you’ve got to do something. Talk to him, get over him… you’ll drive yourself nuts if you don’t.”
I’d lost count of how many times we’d had this exact same conversation. We both always said the same thing – it was like some freakish dream, except, quite obviously, it wasn’t a dream. I’d tried to get over him – really, I had, but it hadn’t worked. I’d even been out on a few dates while Keith was on the road. They were all very nice guys – and not at all unfortunate looking – but I found myself comparing them to Keith. I was starting to worry about myself. That man was under my skin like no one ever had been before.
“Listen – let’s go out tonight. I’ll have Dave stay home with the kids. You call Gail, I’ll call Mary,” Holly suggested when I hadn’t responded.
“Sounds good – meet here at 7?”
“Works for me… dinner?”
“Unless you have a better idea, see you then. Love you, sis.”
“You too.”
We hung up and I lay back on the couch. I’d spent the night at Keith’s – don’t look at me that way, he has a guestroom – and come home earlier this afternoon when he left to go to the gym. It was 2p.m. “Plenty of time for a nap before I need to start getting ready,” I thought to myself. I called Gail and then lay down on the couch, setting the alarm on my cell phone to wake me in two hours… I didn’t get to sleep that long.
*Knock, knock, knock*
“I’m obviously not allowed to sleep,” I thought as I pulled myself up off of the couch and stumbled to the front door. I opened it to find my favorite Australian (with a knack for waking me up) grinning at me. “Hey Keith.”
“G’day… again. Whatcha’ doin’?” He asked as he stepped inside.
“I was gonna nap for a while before going out for dinner.”
“Dinner? With anyone I know?”
“My sister and the girls.”
“O… I thought maybe you had a date.”
Was that relief I heard in his voice? Had I seen a flash of jealousy and a look of worry in his eyes? Nah, couldn’t be. “Funny… no, I don’t have a date.”
“You know you’ll have to date again eventually.”
“What makes you think that I haven’t?”
“Not all men are scum… wait... have you dated?”
“I realize that. You aren’t, my brother isn’t, my dad isn’t, Dave isn’t, and Michael (Holly’s son) isn’t. And yeah, I went out a couple of times while you were touring.”
Keith laughed, “At least I made the list… and how did I miss you dating? I’m supposed to approve of your boyfriends – remember?”
“Funny, Keith. And it just never came up, besides, no approving needed – none of them went past the first date.”
“Oh.”
“So what’s up?”
“Since you’re having a girl’s night, nothing.”
“We’re just going to dinner… I’m free afterwards.”
He hung around and talked while I got ready to go out. He was still there when the girls arrived, which was always interesting when it came to Mary and Gail. They were my friends but they never seemed to be able to quite grasp the concept that Keith was a person off stage, as well as on. They were always tongue-tied around him – not at all helped by his charm. They were mush by the time we all got into Holly’s car.
“You two are funny,” Holly told them, laughing.
“Hilarious,” I added, “I promise he doesn’t bite.”
“But he’s Keith Urban,” Mary argued.
I rolled my eyes. “He’s a dork… and he’s human. Are y’all EVER gonna get used to him? I mean really ladies; I’ve known him longer than I’ve known the two of you. He shouldn’t come as a surprise anymore.”
“Shouldn’t – but he does,” Mary answered.
“You do realize he’s the most gorgeous man on the planet, right Hope?” Gail asked.
“Honey, I’m not blind,” I laughed.
“It’s no wonder you love him,” Mary sighed.
I groaned and slid down further into my seat. I should have known Holly was up to something. She looked at me.
“Hope dear, you had to know we’d talk about it.”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah… and just so you know: I could care less what he looks like.” If there was one thing I hated, it was people who valued Keith only for his looks. Yeah, ok, he’s the most gorgeous thing on two legs, but there’s a lot more to him than that – too few people seemed to notice that.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
By the end of the evening I was more confused than when I started and I had a headache to boot. After saying goodbyes to the girls I went inside and called Keith to let him know I wasn’t up to doing anything else tonight. I was tired, I had a lot on my mind, and my head hurt. I was suddenly even more thankful that I had the next day off from work.
Keith answered after the second ring. “Hello mate.”
“Hey Keith.”
“You have fun?”
“Yeah. Thanks. Listen, I know you wanted to do something, but I’m not up to it right now, I think I’m just gonna wash up and lay down.”
“O, ok. Is everything alright?” He asked, sounding surprised.
“Yeah, just a headache.”
“You need anything?”
“No, I’m OK.”
“K, let me know if you think of something,” Somehow, he didn’t sound convinced.
“I will. G’night.”
“Night Hope.”
I layed down a short time later, but it was a while before I fell asleep. My mind was too busy with thoughts of my predicament. What was I going to do? I supposed I could probably keep living my life secretly loving him but never saying anything, but Holly was right: I’d lose my mind, and besides, how was I supposed to live happily and find love if I was already in love with someone else? That would never work. I sighed as tears came to my eyes. What in the world was I going to do? I couldn’t tell him - I’d scare him off or he’d laugh thinking I was joking. I couldn’t lose my best friend – he meant too much to me, we’d been through too much together. I’d almost lost him once – forever – I couldn’t stand the thought of going through something like that again. I fell asleep still arguing with myself.
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Ohhhhhh, come onnnn. You need to stop leaving me hanging like that I will explode. Grrrr. -- Rodeo, 21:01:15 03/21/06 Tue [1]
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I'm with Rodeo; I need more! What will Hope do? Does she risk it all? Does she keep it all inside and just gawk at him from afar? I can't wait to find out! -- birdinflight, 21:32:47 03/21/06 Tue [1]
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Part IV - The rest of the story after this I'm still working on - editting and proof-reading... hopefully won't be too long before it's ready to post, but we'll see, lol -- Sunny, 00:47:17 03/22/06 Wed [1]
I was awoken a few hours later to a warm hand on my forehead. I opened my eyes to see Keith looking at me, obviously concerned. He had apparently decided it was safe to make use of his key and not knock, that was different of him. He moved his hand from my forehead to my cheek when he saw my eyes open.
“Hey,” I said sleepily.
“You feel ok?”
“I’m not quite awake enough to know. What time is it?”
“1AM. I was worried.”
I half smiled. “Thanks,” I said, sitting up.
“No, don’t get up.”
I gladly lay back down – moving wasn’t helping my headache that hadn’t quite disappeared.
“Head still hurt?” He asked, wrinkling his brow.
“Yeah.”
“Go back to sleep, I just wanted to check on you.”
I was suddenly feeling worse.
“Keith – could you stay?”
“Sure thing, baby.”
“Thanks.”
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
The warm sun shining through my bedroom windows woke me the next morning. I rolled over and looked at Keith who, it seems, had decided to stay in my room. He was still dressed, all except for his belt and shoes which were lying on the floor next to the bed. I watched him as he slept, the sunlight dancing across his face and the rise and fall of his chest as he breathed. Keith was an incredible man and I loved and respected him more than I could ever put into words. He was intelligent, strong, loving, and the best friend anyone could ever want.
He opened his eyes, “Good morning. You feel any better?” He asked - his accent thick in his sleepy state.
“Much better, thanks.”
“Good,” he said, pulling me into a hug.
I guess I should explain – Keith is a “hugger.” He hugs everyone… his family, his friends, his fans, his road band, his road crew, the people at his record label and management company, his lawyer, random awards show presenters, other entertainers, radio DJs, CMT and GAC employees… you get the idea. People who spend significant amounts of time around him get used to it after a while, and the other guys learn that that is just how Keith is.
“So what are you doing today?” Keith asked.
“I need to do some laundry, but nothing other than that. What about you?”
“Nothing; I have a meeting with Borman tomorrow about CMA nomination announcements – it seems they want me to read them - and an interview with a radio station, but nothing today.”
“Nice.”
“I actually need to do laundry too, or else I’m going to have to do this next leg of the tour naked.”
“I’d be willing to bet some of your fans wouldn’t mind in the least,” I joked.
“Oh yeah, and I’d make Mum, Dad, and Shane real proud then,” he laughed.
We sat in silence for a few minutes, both lost in our own thoughts. It was Keith who broke the quiet.
“You really had me worried last night, you know.”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to worry you. I just really wasn’t feeling very good.”
“I saw that once I got over here. I was kind of afraid you just didn’t want to see me.”
“What?! Keith Lionel, you know better than that.”
“Yeah, I don’t know, I was just thinking…” his voice trailed off.
“About anything you want to talk about?”
“Not really – a lot of things, I guess. Don’t worry about it.”
I gave him a sideways glance. He wasn’t telling me the truth, but I also knew I wouldn’t get it out of him if I tried. “Alright. I’m gonna go take a shower,” I got up out of bed, grabbing my robe as I went out the door to the bathroom.
I spent my shower thinking about what Keith had said. He was nuts if he thought I didn’t want to spend time with him. Had I done something to make him think that? Tone of voice, maybe? No, I didn’t think so anyway.
I kept thinking about it the rest of the day.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Keith left around noon; I stayed home to do laundry and cleaning. He called at 4:00 asking if I was planning to cook or if I wanted to go out and eat somewhere. I told him if he came over I’d cook something. He didn’t get enough home-cooked meals – he was home and I was going to make sure he got a decent meal or two before he hit the road again.
Supper was salad, spaghetti, and the garlic bread that I had managed to talk Keith into making. After loading the dishes into the dish washer we sat down in the living-room to relax.
“Keith, can I ask you something?” This morning was still bothering me.
“Sure, anything.”
“This morning… something was bothering you,” I watched him as I spoke, “Is there something you want to talk about? Is everything ok?”
“Everything’s fine, I just got to thinking too much. Really, don’t worry about it.”
“Are you sure? I promise I won’t get mad – you know that. Did I say something?”
“No, I promise you, everything is ok.”
I knew he wasn’t lying now. “Ok,” I responded, settling back into the couch, still confused, but content in knowing that my friend was alright.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
“Hope, sweetie, wake up… Hope.”
We had fallen asleep on the couch. His voice woke me from my troubled sleep. I opened my eyes to his blue ones, full of concern, and felt tears streaming down my face. He pulled me to him and held me tight, stroking my hair and promising me that everything was OK and that he’d keep me safe. He didn’t have to ask what I’d been dreaming – he knew.
I hadn’t had a dream like that in months – I had hoped that they were over. I knew he couldn’t hurt me now - that he was out of my life for good – Keith had been an integral part of that. All that was left of him in my life was an occasional bad dream - for that I was thankful and thankful even more was I for this wonderful man who I called my best friend.
Keith’s strong arms around me brought me comfort and my crying slowed, my ever-growing consciousness making me realize it really had been just a bad dream – he was gone and I was safe.
Noticing my decreased tears, Keith pulled back and looked at me, “I thought you had stopped having those.”
“I did too,” I sighed.
“You know you’re safe – he can’t come near you, he can’t hurt you again.”
“I know, Keith, I know.” I was tearing up again. “Did I ever thank you?”
“Yeah – it wasn’t necessary then and it isn’t necessary now,” he said gently, reaching out to hug me again when he saw a tear slide down my cheek. After a few moments he spoke: “Let’s go to bed – it’s 2am and I’m not going to leave you here alone tonight.”
“I’ll be ok, you really can go home if you want.”
“If I go home I’ll worry about you for the rest of night,” he said, smiling slightly.
“Alright then.”
We walked back to the bedroom where he dug a pair of his track pants and a t-shirt out of my closet before walking back out to the bathroom to change. Somehow, in the course of our friendship, we’d ended up with significant amounts of each other’s stuff at our homes. I had my pajamas on and was in the bed before he returned. I heard him shuffle in the door and looked up.
“Would you rather I slept in the guestroom?”
Guestroom? It was practically his room.
“I think I’d feel better if you were in here.”
“I guessed you would. I’ll be right back.”
He returned a moment later with the blanket from the guest bed. I gave him a confused look. He laughed: “I’m going to be a gentleman and not sleep under the same covers as you.”
“Because we’ve never shared a bed before…” I said sarcastically, raising my eyebrows at him, “you really don’t have to do that.”
Obviously that was enough of a confirmation for him because he dropped the blanket in the chair next to my dresser before getting into the bed.
“Goodnight Keith.”
“Night Hope.”
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
I lay there awake for a while, thinking… and remembering. I had been dating Derrick for four months the first time he hit me and it took another four months for anyone to find out. I was too afraid of him to tell anyone and too proud to admit what was happening. Looking back, I’m glad Keith found out – it probably saved my life. I was at home alone one day when he came over. I hadn’t been expecting any company had put on a t-shirt that morning. I’d never seen such a look in Keith’s eyes as he had when he saw my bare arms – a mixture of pain, compassion, and anger. After a long talk I decided to leave Derrick (who was out of town on a business trip) – right then. Keith and I spent the night moving all of my things from the apartment into the garage of the house he was renting. Once we got to bed, I slept better than I had in a long time. Keith has always been able to make me feel safe like that. He took me to the police station the next day and the cops were waiting on Derrick when he returned to Nashville. I haven’t heard from or seen him since.
I turned over in bed and, snuggling down underneath the covers, fell asleep almost instantly.
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Ahh to have a friend like Keith! How could she just lie there in the same bed without being tempted to jump him, I'll never understand! This just gets better and better, great job sunny. -- AussieChick, 01:14:41 03/22/06 Wed [1]
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AussieChick's right, this is getting better, you are really talented with this stuff. -- Rodeo, 17:36:10 03/22/06 Wed [1]
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I love sexual tension! All other tension sucks but, sexual tension, I think the world needs more sexual tension...love and sexual tension...love and sexual tension between Keith and me...love, sexual tension between Keith and me and more chocolate...I've figure out the secret of life here! LOL! -- birdinflight, 19:28:48 03/22/06 Wed [1]
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bird? -- kennedypratt, 20:46:07 03/22/06 Wed [1]
Bird I think you've lost it. Are you okay? Please don't tell me that you have a new baby bump too!!
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kennedy? -- birdinflight, 16:49:33 03/23/06 Thu [1]
Hush your mouth! Bite your tongue! LOL! Actually, I was kinda hoping to find out that I was carrying Keith's love child after those front row seats last month. But, no such luck...Do you remember you ask for my email a while back and I only had one for work? Well, I have a new email now and would love to hear from you sometime or anyone else on the board for that matter! Email me at birdofthehouse@yahoo.com.
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email? -- kennedypratt, 19:11:48 03/23/06 Thu [1]
Bird, do you talk to that many Kennedys online that you can't keep us straight? And here I thought I was the only one. You and Keith can't master that under cover behavior can you? LOL, just kidding. I don't remember asking for your email but I will be sure to add you to me address book.
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Part V - This is the last part... I thought about only posting half and leaving you hanging, purely for mean-ness, but I'm not going to. Thanks everyone for reading and commenting. :) -- Sunny, 02:00:06 03/24/06 Fri [1]
My alarm woke me at six o’clock the next morning. I went to shower and was unsurprised to find Keith still sleeping when I returned to the bedroom. I grabbed my clothes and went back down the hall to the bathroom to dress for work. I left Keith a note on the nightstand before I left reminding him to lock the door and turn off the lights when he left and also thanking him for the night before.
I had the radio on at my desk at work but was only half listening, which would explain why I jumped when I suddenly heard a very familiar voice. I had forgotten about Keith’s interview. I turned up the volume a little to listen. He answered the usual questions about his tour and when he was going to record a new album – and he gave the usual answers. They asked him about the upcoming CMAs and whether or not he was expecting to win anything. In usual Keith-fashion he said he really didn’t think about awards and that he was always surprised to just be nominated. They next asked him about his love-life. Was he single? Dating? Pursuing? I was surprised to hear him not only NOT laugh it off or state his singleness, but actually tell the DJs that he was “considering pursuing” someone. This response led to a whole slew of other questions, some of which he actually answered. He told them that he wasn’t sure how the other person felt, which made him nervous, and that no, he didn’t know if she was listening. I was confused. He usually came to me for advice on these things – why hadn’t he mentioned it? I decided to ask him about it later.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
I hadn’t been home 10 minutes when my cell phone rang. It was Keith asking if I was interested in going to dinner somewhere. I agreed to meet him at Cracker Barrel in half an hour. I quickly changed into jeans and a tank top - instead of my scrubs - and headed out the door.
Keith was sitting in a rocker on the restaurant porch when I arrived. I parked, locked the car, and walked toward him and was met with a hug and a smile. God, I loved his smile. Luckily, there wasn’t a wait and we were seated as soon as we got inside. We chatted about our days and I mentioned hearing his interview. He told me about the conversation he’d had with his mum that morning. The waitress came to take our orders a few minutes later and her obvious shock to be serving Keith Urban distracted us from our conversation for a moment. It always made me laugh to see people’s reactions to Keith. He was the most normal, average guy anyone could ever want to meet – there was nothing pretentious or aloof about him – but people were always tongue-tied. Sometimes, I think, his normalcy took them by surprise. Once the waitress left our conversation started back up and didn’t stop until we got our food – not that eating kept us quiet for long. Keith and I could talk for hours about anything and everything, but silence was never awkward. I think that’s what I loved most about our friendship.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
After dinner we decided to drive down to a park by the river and walk. It was a beautiful evening. The sun was just beginning to set when we found a bench and decided to sit down. We had been quiet for a few minutes – taking in the evening and our surroundings, enjoying the warm night air - when Keith spoke: “Can I ask you a question?” He asked, so quietly I could barely hear him. He wasn’t looking at me; instead he was looking out over the water.
“Of course.”
He turned around and looked me in the eyes before softly asking: “Would you ever consider dating me?” He sounded nervous. If only he knew just how nervous that question made me. I hoped he couldn’t tell that my heart rate had at least doubled. We’d always been able to talk about stuff – anything and everything – but this had never come up.
“Um…” I bit my lower lip, forcing myself to not look away from him, “that’s an odd sort of question. Why do you ask?”
“Just theoretically speaking, if I were to ever, say, ask you out on a date – a real date, not like when we usually go out – would you go?”
Theoretically speaking – so I could play this like a game, but what if I said the wrong thing? What if he has feelings for me? What if he doesn’t? There were too many “what ifs.”
“Um… I don’t know how to answer.”
“Just be honest.”
“But what if my honest answer isn’t the one you want? I don’t want to lose you.”
“You won’t.”
I took a deep breath and looked at him for a minute, studying his face. He was usually easy for me to read, but I wasn’t getting anything now. I didn’t know what to say – I’d never lied to him before (and I wasn’t going to start now) but I was a little afraid of what his reaction to my answer would be if I didn’t. This was my chance, I could get it all out in the open, finally tell him what I’d been feeling for so long… and so wanting to tell him. I’d never been so nervous. I turned my head and looked out over the river; watching as the ripples in the water distorted the moon’s reflection. I answered, barely above a whisper: “Yes.”
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
He hadn’t said anything in the two minutes since I’d answered and I was beginning to worry. I was still looking at the river; I couldn’t bring myself to look at him. I was afraid to turn around. I felt his hand on my face as he gently turned me around to look at him.
“Don’t tell me what you think I want to hear.”
What he wanted to hear? I was quite obviously missing something. “Keith, you know I’d never do that.”
“You were being honest?” Why did he sound so surprised?
“Very.” He got quiet again. I couldn’t stand it. “Please say something.”
He turned around and looked at me and I saw a tear slide down his cheek. “You know me better than anyone else and you’d date me?”
“Why in the world would that stop me?” I responded, softly.
“Because you know me - all of my faults, all the times I’ve screwed up, all of the dumb things I’ve done. You’ve seen me at my absolute worst… and you’d date me?”
“I don’t understand why you think any of that would have an affect on it."
“You KNOW me.”
“And I also know that I care for you more deeply than I have ever cared for a man.” If we were being honest, we might as well get it all out. “Keith, look at me,” he turned to face me and I smiled. “You are an amazing human being. I have more respect for you than I know how to put into words. You’ve been through things that most people would have never survived and you’re the best friend I’ve ever had…”
He cut me off: “Friend…”
“…and I wouldn’t object to being more than that.”
“You mean it?”
“I wouldn’t lie to you.”
We were quiet again, but I didn’t let it last long, “Where did all of this come from all of a sudden?”
“All of a sudden?” He said with a slight chuckle, “I’ve been trying to talk myself into bringing up for weeks.”
“Would you mind if I ask why?” He sighed and looked away again. “Keith…?” O God. What if one of my big-mouthed friends had said something to him?
“Because, I…” he took a deep breath and looked at me, “because I love you… and not just the friendly ‘I love you.’ Hope, I’m in love with you.”
WHAT?! He loved me?! I’d been arguing with myself for months, trying to convince myself that I really didn’t love him, and he feels the same way?! And why haven’t I said anything back yet… Hope, you idiot – tell him! “Keith… I love you too. I have for a long time. I was so afraid to say anything.” We sat like that for a minute, just looking into each other’s eyes – then: RING!!! Keith and I both jumped – it was his phone. I heard him cuss under his breath as he shoved his hand into his pocket in search of the offending device. He looked at it and grumbled something about Kenny before picking up.
“Mate, can I call you back? ... No man, not tonight… Plans? Not exactly… I’m kind of in the middle of something… What? You’re sick… listen… Kenny, mate, really, I gotta go…” he sighed and ran a hand through his hair, “You remember what I was talking to you about the other day - about Hope? Yeah, I just told her. Bye.” He looked embarrassed as he turned the phone off before putting it back into his pocket. “Talk about killing a moment,” he said with a nervous chuckle, “sorry about that.”
“It’s alright,” I couldn’t remember him ever being nervous around me before, it was cute. It would have been even cuter had I not been at the very least as nervous as he was.
“Remind me to hit him.” We sat in silence for a moment, both wanting to pick up where the phone had distracted us, but both to afraid to go first. “Hope?”
I looked up at him and he placed a hand on my cheek and pulled me toward him, our faces only millimeters apart. After a moment, he kissed me: hesitantly at first, then relaxing as I brought my hand up to rest on the back of his neck. After the initial shock of his lips on mine wore off, I kissed him back. It was the most wonderful kiss I’d ever shared. It has always amazed me how something as simple as a kiss can be so moving, so beautiful, and so meaningful. I was teary-eyed by the time he broke apart. He looked at me and, seeing the tears, pulled me to him. We sat like that for a long time, my body pressed to his. I could feel his chest move as breathed and hear his heart as it beat. He took my hand and held it in his, weaving our fingers together. I felt him kiss the top of my head and looked up at him. He had tears in his eyes. I reached up and brushed one away that had managed to escape his efforts to hold them back.
“I’m OK,” he said, half smiling.
“You don’t look OK,” I stated gently.
“It’s all just so surreal.”
I couldn’t agree more. The tears I’d finally managed to stop came back. I wanted to speak, to tell him how much I loved him, but I couldn’t find the words… so I kissed him. When we broke, I brushed a stray piece of hair from his face and, looking him the eyes, said the words I’d wanted to say for so long: “I love you.” He smiled.
THE END
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phone call -- kennedypratt, 02:37:44 03/24/06 Fri [1]
Since when has Kenny ever ruined a mood? Nice ending. I like the river scene.
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LOL -- Sunny, 02:46:56 03/24/06 Fri [1]
I don't think Kenny could ruin a mood if he tried, but he's the person that came to mind at the time I was writing it. I quite like Kenny. Glad you enjoyed it. :)
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Ahhhh, great ending, to bad it had to end. -- Rodeo, 16:13:26 03/24/06 Fri [1]
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Sweet story -- Debbi (LadySherotica), 06:08:04 03/26/06 Sun [1]
I thoroughly enjoyed it from beginning to end ... too bad it had to end! Now ... when is the next one? hehe
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Thanks -- Sunny, 02:22:20 03/29/06 Wed [1]
Glad you enjoyed it. Thanks for reading it. I really can't tell you ladies how much I appreciate that you took the time to read and comment on it.
Next one? I have lots of ideas floating around in my head - hopefully one of them will actually come together as a story soon.
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