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| Subject: Full Moon Chaos | |
Author: Tammy | [ Next Thread |
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] Date Posted: 15:22:22 10/26/07 Fri Well...this full moon was supposedly the biggest one of 2007, and with it came the chaos that full moons usually bring. In doing so, the energies usually implement situations to bring to the fore, all the debris that we should have taken care of, or makes us face things within ourselves. I can say without a doubt, that for myself, and most of my friends, this full moon has brought with it an enormous shove! Two nights ago, I was verbally assaulted. The woman blocked my way with her van, and instigated something, where it wasn't called for; leaving me no choice but to call police, press charges and as for a restraining order, sinc she intentionally instigated this. Yesterday, my 15 year old son was arrested for making a prank call to the Ottawa police, while at school, saying there was a gun in the school. The school was locked down and well you can imagine the chaos and fear that happened afterwards. So, now my brilliant child, who I suspect is either acting out because something is in turmoil within himself, or this moon nudged what was there and he acted out. The thing with him, is when his inner world is in turmoil, he reacts outwardly doing stupid things. So, he is bound for court on November 20th. His case worker will know all the details by Monday and we'll see what happens. The fact that he's had some conflicts before he left, with dealing with his emotions, and that he was sent to try it out with his dad for a school year, while I still held sole custody of him, with judicial acknowledgement that he would reside with his dad for the school year. Up until now, and that is damn good...since March, he's been a well behaved kid, doing well and facing is problems. So what happened to trigger such an event? I just spoke to his father, and we don't communicate very well, once he gets his head involved with a woman. And very well suspect it has alot to do with this woman taking up precious time from his developing relationship with his father. My son, didn't have his father in his life for most of it, and that was the root of his problems earlier this year and last year. I find it ironic that my son began acting out last week, about a day or two after his dad went back out with this nutty woman he was seeing before. My son does not like her, she's a screamer and not very sensitive to kids that are not hers. My ex, does not see this as any relevance to the events that just occurred. But I raised my son alone for the most part of his 15 years, and have walked many hard roads with him. So, when my ex says..I don't get it..I don't understand, and I didn't spend enough time with him to know since I"m not there..NOW...but damnit...I KNOW my boy inside and out, and even when my boy is in denial, he usually comes around to understanding what mom already knew and will sit and talk with me and thank me. But..NO I don't know anything. Grrrr! This has been the week from hell!!! Anyways...I'm done for now..I still need to talk to him later this evening and find out more from him, but because his dad the girlfriend will be right there, I highly doubt my son will tell me much, but will hint around things, and allow me to ask pertinent questions, which he'll no doubtedly give me those answers. The thing I will worry about is....will they lock him up? That is never a thing a parent wants to consider, and that aches me tonight big time!! So I'll leave it at this and fill in the gaps as I get them. Thanks for the ears... Hugs and love, Tammy [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ] |
| [> Subject: Re: Full Moon Chaos | |
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Author: andy [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 16:39:39 10/26/07 Fri Wow! You really have had a couple of tough days. He is probably acting out however, don't be light on him or make excuses for him because he needs to know just how bad a bind something like that gets him in to. I know all about being young and stupid and acting out as well. I still act out all the time just ask Christine. Anyway, I feel for you as a Mother and a friend but, make sure he knows the significance of the penalties for doing something like that. Ahhhhh Tammy, Momma said they'll be days like this my Mamma said! hugs, andy |
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Author: Christine [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 17:54:13 10/26/07 Fri Tammy, Full Moon Chaos? Actually, this moon was about closing the door on old wounds and looking towards the future (smile). Of course, there are those (like some nutjob with a van) that could be certifiable in relation to moon madness. However, I am standing on my soapbox now. On my toes, but I'm up there waving scissors!!! I know you're worried about your son, but really, he's just gotta take responsibility for his actions. Boys do really stupid things just trying to get some attention - but usually that kind of stupidity is from trying to get attention from his peers. Not his father. Not his mother. You really can't blame anyone but your son. Seriously. His reaction to his father not being around, or to his father's girlfriend is just something HE is going to have to work out - with his father. You can run in and force your ex to be a father. But your son can, if he speaks up and talks to his father. The only thing you can do is point out the mistakes that your son is making, encourage him to talk to his father about what is bothering him and then stay out of that part of his life. Trying to make your ex see something that just might not have any relevance makes you look like you are either a) jealous; or b) trying to control his life thru your son. Whether or not your hunch is correct, you shouldn't automatically assume that your son's problem stems from his other parent. You could be just as much the problem as he is. I'm a single mom, you know. I've had to raise my nephew, along with my daughter, on my own and then let him go back to his parents when the time was right. He got in all sorts of crap - the worst was when he broke windows out of a factory. His parents said he was acting out because they didn't "want him". Truth was that he did it because the kids he hung out with dared him to. And if he didn't squeal then he was cool and he could hang out with them. Kevin went to court - I made him. He took responsibility and was made to work in the factory after school for two years (and on weekends) to earn money to pay for all the windows he broke, and he had to continue to make good grades. Was it hard for me? Yes. I love him. But I know that if I let him fall back on the excuse that his parents couldn't get it together to be true parents at the time or that I was a single mom raising a child not my own, or that his father had a string of girlfriends and took care of their kids before his own, or that my sister tossed him to the side to be with a guy and have his child, I would be enabling him to give excuses for future bad behaviors. Being a mom is all about the child, not about who birthed him or who donated the sperm, or even about who is attached to whomever when and where. It's all about the kid and teaching him to be a strong individual who takes responsibility for his actions. *Sigh* I'm lecturing, I know.....forgive me, please. It's just that you're such a great woman and I'd really hate to hear that something like this (or worse) continue for you and your son. I didn't mean to lay it on heavy when you have a load right now...but just think about what I said....and what Andy said. I'm thinking of you...all good thoughts!! ~Hugs~ |
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Author: Tammy [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 18:43:13 10/26/07 Fri Ya know what guys! I know you are right..and Christine you make very valid points too. I acknowledge the worth and wisdom of them too. Thank you. Here you can read it in the newspaper out in Ottawa. http://www.cbc.ca/ottawa/story/2007/10/19/ot-lockdown-071019.html?ref=rss Let me know if the link works. Thank you and big hugs to you both. I appreciate it. Love ya, Tammy |
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Author: Tammy [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 18:44:30 10/26/07 Fri http://www.cbc.ca/canada/ottawa/story/2007/10/19/ot-lockdown-071019.html?ref=rss The other link didn't work..try this one... |
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Author: Tammy [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 12:38:09 10/27/07 Sat 2nd article in the ottawa sun http://www.cbc.ca/canada/ottawa/story/2007/10/25/ot-911-hoax-071025.html |
| [> Subject: Re: Full Moon Chaos | |
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Author: Christine [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 21:12:01 10/26/07 Fri Tammy, After reading that story, I am convinced that it is all about "being one of the guys" and not what you thought. But, you gotta stand tough - even if your son is faced with with stiff opposition. He's gotta know that this isn't something that is funny, or even "cool". I know you're scared (I put myself in your shoes and thought of Kevin - I was scared), but you have to stand firm and let him take the responsibility for his actions, but also letting him know that even if his choice was to do this, you do not approve (nor would you ever) - but it doesn't stop you from loving him and worrying/caring about him. And sweetie, that's all you CAN do, beside maybe getting him a good attorney. I'm thinking good thoughts and sending positive energy your way (you need it). ~Hugs~ |
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Author: Tammy [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 05:39:17 10/27/07 Sat ((Christine)) I agree...He does have to face the responsibities..never disputed that. But even if he was just trying to fit in, and he was trying to live up to them, it was a very stupid thing to do, and I'm highly disappointed in him. All I was trying to say before...and maybe I didn't explain it right, is that knowing my son as I do, I believe, that we unravel the motive to making poor judgement, beside peer pressure and all that is going on in his life. I found it coincidental, and I don't believe in coincidence...that the minute dad started dating this nut...my son began acting up. Yes, he's got to deal with it..I agree. And I truly believe that he needs to face some other demons as well. I'm not trying to make excuses for him, and I do love him so much, and want him to learn from him mistakes as any parent would want. ((Christine)) thank you so much, and I tell you this..I do not mind your "lectures" at all. In fact...they do help remind me of what I do know..and reinforces it...so..it's a blessing. Big hugs, Tammy |
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Author: Sasha [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 16:33:56 10/27/07 Sat ~ ((((((((((((((((big-as warm 'n' knowing hugs)))))))))))))))) Tammy girl, this thread is right up my alley! My son, too, has faced many challenges...he's a bull in the china shop of life..lol and I agree with Andz and Chris, with my own slant on things... Like you, I am an intuitive, and I know YOU know your son. There may be several different REASONS why he made the CHOICE to do what he did, though we all know there is NO excuse. I believe what you were trying to highlight, were the REASONS why! However, in a nutshell, your son made a choice, as did my son...and in choosing that particular action, he CHOSE the CONSEQUENCE... and as hard as it is for us parents to watch our babies make these choices, it's a path they themselves, chose. Now, that is not to say that they won't learn from this, because they most definitely WILL LEARN... but your son will be just fine, he is LOVED...and that is an awesome foundation *love 'n' hugs* Sash xx  |
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Author: Tammy [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 17:02:20 10/27/07 Sat (((Sasha))) **Tears** I was ok in the first day or so of this unraveling, but today I find it hard to face the reality of what those CONSEQUENCES IMPLY. I agree he IS responsible for the choice HE MADE, and at the same token, I "see" the boy inside, and who HE is TRULY and WHY his decision making skills might sway towards CHOOSING such things. No excuses...I realize it is HIS PATH and he CHOSE this path. But it does not negate the ache within a mother's heartcore as you know. For once in my life, I feel so helpless, so void of being able to do something for my son, and I do not relish it one bit, but I understand the implicit need for him to face this responsibly no matter the outcome. Thank you so much for your understanding and love here. Big hugs and lots of love, Tammy |
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Author: Christine [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 01:18:25 10/29/07 Mon (((Tammy))) I got the PM - I'm hugging you!!! ~Lotsa Hugs Because I CAN~ |
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Author: Tammy [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 05:03:42 10/29/07 Mon Thanks Christine...((Hugs)) Love ya, Tammy |
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