Bullying a Sibling -- Strict But Fair Families

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Subject: Bullying a Sibling

Author:
Al
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Date Posted: 09:44:03 04/03/26 Fri

In 1997 I was renting a room to a friend who became involved with a girl who was just 18. Long story short, she had a broken family and sort of bonded to me as a dad figure. They had a child together and named me as the Godfather. She married someone else and they had two kids. For 20 years they lived off and on with me for economic reasons. I had parenting authority over all three. They were basically my "family".

One weekend when I watched them, the oldest had soccer and I sent the 9 y/o and her 7 y/o brother to play in the play area. It was about 100 ft away and easily within eyesight. She had a habit of picking on him, he had been recently diagnosed at Stanford with Asperger's and social anxiety. I gave them a baggie of snacks and told the oldest to share.

After a short amount of time I noticed he wanted some snacks and she yelled "No!". He paced and she threw some on the ground in front of him. I just happened to see this. On the way back to the car I asked her if she shared the snacks and she said she did. I told her "throwing them on the ground for your brother is not sharing and we will talk more when we get home.".

I talked to her about sharing and lying and how making her brother pick them from the dirt (he didn't btw) was bullying. After some more discussion I spanked her over her undies. Not hard, not long, but she was shocked that grandpa Al spanked his little princess lol.

Looking back on it I still to this day felt it was the right thing to do. I thought it might have been better to give each kid their own baggie but at her age it should not have been necessary.

How do you handle siblings bullying another or trying to act superior lol? I know it's kids being kids, but I felt that specific behavior needed to be nipped in the bud then and now. Her Mom concurred with my actions, btw.

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Replies:

Subject Author Date

Re: Bullying a Sibling Sarah 09:48:18 04/03/26 Fri

Re: Bullying a Sibling Dad of four daughters 10:51:46 04/04/26 Sat

Re: Bullying a Sibling Kev 16:20:58 04/04/26 Sat

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>In 1997 I was renting a room to a friend who became >involved with a girl who was just 18. Long story >short, she had a broken family and sort of bonded to >me as a dad figure. They had a child together and >named me as the Godfather. She married someone else >and they had two kids. For 20 years they lived off and >on with me for economic reasons. I had parenting >authority over all three. They were basically my >"family". > >One weekend when I watched them, the oldest had soccer >and I sent the 9 y/o and her 7 y/o brother to play in >the play area. It was about 100 ft away and easily >within eyesight. She had a habit of picking on him, he >had been recently diagnosed at Stanford with >Asperger's and social anxiety. I gave them a baggie of >snacks and told the oldest to share. > >After a short amount of time I noticed he wanted some >snacks and she yelled "No!". He paced and she threw >some on the ground in front of him. I just happened to >see this. On the way back to the car I asked her if >she shared the snacks and she said she did. I told her >"throwing them on the ground for your brother is not >sharing and we will talk more when we get home.". > >I talked to her about sharing and lying and how making >her brother pick them from the dirt (he didn't btw) >was bullying. After some more discussion I spanked her >over her undies. Not hard, not long, but she was >shocked that grandpa Al spanked his little princess >lol. > >Looking back on it I still to this day felt it was the >right thing to do. I thought it might have been better >to give each kid their own baggie but at her age it >should not have been necessary. > >How do you handle siblings bullying another or trying >to act superior lol? I know it's kids being kids, but >I felt that specific behavior needed to be nipped in >the bud then and now. Her Mom concurred with my >actions, btw.

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Subject	Author	Date
Re: Bullying a Sibling	Sarah	09:48:18 04/03/26 Fri

Re: Bullying a Sibling	Dad of four daughters	10:51:46 04/04/26 Sat

Re: Bullying a Sibling	Kev	16:20:58 04/04/26 Sat