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hi Steadykick! Just a couple things I noticed. Not really much but...I don't know. What do you think of these: In the begining of chapter 4, you put 'when Mother goldenfur got to the WAGON.....and took up the CART' I don't know if there is much difference but...also in the middle of chap. 4 you said 'they had clubbed preskenot too hard' now it was unclear throughout the story when preskenot was clubbed and who clubbed him and why, at least I didn't notice anywhere. I'll go back and check in chapter 3. One more thing; in the second section of chap. 4 you said 'only skipper stayed in the room' in the next lin you put going down the stairs...' it was unclear when he went out of the room or even if he did. Sorry, you asked me to. I don't know. maybe it's just me and there is nothing wrong but you can think about it. *the ottermaid smiled and added as she left the room-* Keep writing! I wanna here more!!