This has nothing to do with basketball, but it is too funny! -- XAVIER MENS BASKETBALL

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Date Posted: 15:52:11 02/07/02 Thu
Author: NO JUSTICE! NO PEACE!
Subject: This has nothing to do with basketball, but it is too funny!

Groom Killed By Stripper's Boobs
Wednesday January 16, 2002

GENEVA - A fun-filled bachelor party at a strip club turned deadly when a 32-year-old groom-to-be who was enjoying the attentions of a well-endowed stripper suffocated while his face was buried in her breasts.

The mind-boggling drama unfolded, say cops, while Daniel Greene was attending his bachelor party at the Pretty Kitty strip club.

The club had been rented out for the private affair.

According to investigators, Greene was enjoying a lap dance when disaster struck: One of the strippers, Kandy Kane, got too into her performance and suffocated the man between her 72-DD breasts.

Witnesses said that Greene had had his fair share of beer, but didn't seem out-of-control.

When the song "I'm Too Sexy" began to play, Greene became excited and began to dance on the tabletop, hooting and hollering, pals said, "like an idiot."

Miss Kane, apparently pleased to see someone enjoying her choice in music, moved in closer.

When Greene took his seat, she began giving him a lap dance, shaking her breasts in his face.

The more she shook, the deeper Greene got lost in her cleavage.

"Daniel was having so much fun," partygoer John Gillman said.

"We all thought he loved being in that gal's chest.

"Who could have known that when he was waving his hands around, he was signaling for help?"

Cheering onlookers eventually realized that Greene was no longer moving, and pulled him from between Miss Kane's breasts.

Now Greene's family is suing Miss Kane and the Pretty Kitty for wrongful death.

Greene's father, George, won't specify the amount they are suing for, but claims that it isn't about the money.

"Those breasts were lethal weapons," he told reporters.

"The Pretty Kitty should not have allowed Miss Kane to have her bust enhanced to the size that she did.

"We hope that by filing this lawsuit, we can send a message to other strippers: keep your bra size within a reasonable range."

Kandy Kane made a statement through her attorneys: "I thought he liked it in there. "

The Pretty Kitty declined comment.

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