- New Caption contest picture - or is one really needed? -- Pablo, 10:44:26 09/13/02 Fri
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- These are Gary's sons which he had with his sister! (NT) -- MANWHORE, 10:54:17 09/13/02 Fri
- "Keep your hands up on D...ahh forget it." (NT) -- THE TRUTH, 10:56:43 09/13/02 Fri
- It's gotta be da shoes! (NT) -- Minnie Me, 11:01:54 09/13/02 Fri
- "Does this haircut make me look short? (NT) -- THE TRUTH, 11:06:28 09/13/02 Fri
- Mini-me, meet mini-knee (NT) -- BP, 11:13:39 09/13/02 Fri
- "Homeskillet walks on to the midget pro league team in Nashville so he can have an in with the midget cheerleaders" (NT) -- Homeskillet, 12:50:26 09/13/02 Fri
- If you keep guarding me close, I'm kneeing you in the balls. (NT) -- Awayskillet, 01:57:35 09/14/02 Sat
- Spotlight on Ugzavier recruits from rivals.com (NT) -- Who cares, 09:14:03 09/14/02 Sat
- Snipe vs BP....maybe they are not identical twins after all! BP looks like the smaller one. (NT) -- Wasp Pee, 18:26:04 09/14/02 Sat
- Holy shit, is that a shot clock in your shorts or are you just happy to see me? (NT) -- The little dude in yellow, 19:24:57 09/15/02 Sun
- Hey Demarr, I see a parking spot right over there. Hurry before someone else gets it.
-- Christopher Reeves, 21:59:57 09/16/02 Mon
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- Snipe's Mississippi cousin needs our help -- Homeskillet, 15:09:07 09/16/02 Mon
Man had sex with horse while high on ecstasy
A Mississippi man has been jailed for 18 months for having sex with a horse while high on ecstasy.
Carl Patrick Brown was caught on video surveillance cameras set up by a farmer who suspected trespassers kept invading his barn.
The farmer previously found buckets and stools out of place and once found the chestnut mare tied to a post.
The 30-year-old from Gulfport admitted having sexual intercourse with a horse at Harrison County Court.
He must register as a sex offender on release from prison because the offence is considered a sex crime in Mississippi.
The Sun Herald reports Circuit Judge Jerry O Terry ordered Brown to avoid any future contact with the horse, which is stabled in Pass Christian.
Prosecutors say sex crimes involving animals are uncommon in the region. Assistant District Attorney John Gargiulo added: "This is truly a crime against nature."
Story filed: 13:23 Friday 16th August 2002
HOMESKILLET'S FAVORITE LINE? "THIS IS TRULY A CRIME AGAINST NATURE."
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- Picture Caption Contest -- The Truth, 08:01:39 09/13/02 Fri
Someone pointed out in a previous post that basketball season is still a good month away. Like the battle I fight every morning watching the clock and waiting for it to hit 8:30 so I can start drinking without feeling guilty, this month will go very slow.
The Jesuit educated basketball fans on this board have demonstrated in the past that when challenged they can be quite creative and funny. The “Separated at Birth” threads have been some of the funniest and most read of all time. To help kill the time I thought I would put up a few pictures and we could all try and put up captions similar to what they do in Maxim magazine or what Letterman does on his show. I will try and keep the pictures basketball related, so as not to ruffle any feathers of board members that would rather see the posts only covering topics like defensive sets, RPI comparisons and the reason that wood wind instruments are superior to brass instruments.
I also nominate Gary to give cash prizes to the winner of each weeks contest.
I will start it off with a picture from the highly debated Coles/Cigar Chump article posted earlier today.
I will set the bar with:
"Between you and me, uh, she might have been fifteen, but when you get that little red beaver right up there in front of you, I don't think it's crazy at all and I don't think you do either."
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Replies:
- Yes X-Band - you actually grab the girl's Ta-Ta's - just like this... no reason to be afraid son - let Papa show you how to do it (NT) -- Pablo, 08:02:22 09/13/02 Fri
- After a week in Lloyd's cell my rectum felt like it was THIS BIG. (NT) -- inmate 736998, 08:06:59 09/13/02 Fri
- "So Huggins sends in this picture to ratmypoo.com. I swear it must of been this big! That fat man is real challange to our sewage system." (NT) -- MO LESTER, 09:14:39 09/13/02 Fri
- Everybody knows the bitches here in Oxford are hot as hell, but I can't get me no play. My balls is about this big right now. It's killin' me! (NT) -- Coach Charlie Coles, 09:48:15 09/13/02 Fri
- No, Coach, the guy with the camera frames the picture, but thanks for your help." (NT) -- gmgxu72, 10:27:35 09/13/02 Fri
- I tell you man, that spliff was this big. This f'ing big, man. Where are the Doritos? (NT) -- BP, 11:10:18 09/13/02 Fri
- I recruited Wally because he had the ass of a four year old boy. (NT) -- NO JUSTICE! NO PEACE!, 11:24:09 09/13/02 Fri
- "My wife's snatch was this wide after Homeskillet got through with her." (NT) -- Homeskillet, 12:54:44 09/13/02 Fri
- Gary is a Pussy! -- MANWHORE, 16:19:10 09/12/02 Thu
Oh Gary, you are such a Pussy! Cut the crap and do away with this 'password' 'login' crap on your damn board. How am I supposed to make fun of you? You are such a loser!
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- Snapshot: Lenny Brown vs. Lionel Chalmers -- Snipe, 13:02:39 09/05/02 Thu
Lenny Brown was a soph in 95-96. It was his second year as a starter. Here are some of his stats:
FG% 42.6%
3 Pt FG% 33.7%
FT% 70%
Rebounds 3.8
PPG 15.6
Assists 3.5
Lionel "L-Train" Chalmers was a soph last year. It was his first year as a starter, though he had significant minutes the year before. Here are some of his stats:
FG% 42.1%
3 Pt FG% 35.1%
FT% 71.9%
Rebounds 3.4
PPG 12
Assists 4.2
To me, these numbers look very similar. The two players played with different players, different coaches, and different systems. Brown didn't have West and Sato, but Posey and Williams were excellent players. Brown's team was probably more high octane, and he was probably counted on to do more of the scoring than would be expected of LC. Another obvious point is that LC has played point, and that Brown only played point to spell Lumpkin.
I don't know what you guys think, but I think that Lionel Chalmers is by far the most overlooked player on this roster. Lenny Brown was a great ball player for us, and it looks to me that LC could be as good or even better.
The biggest reason for our success may not be David West or Romain Sato. Those guys are known players. They are both on the Wooden list. The biggest reason for our Final Four run may well be the coming out year for one Lionel Chalmers. Scouts coming to games to rate Sato and West may well being saying who in the hell is that guy to each other in the stands.
They say the point guard is the most important position on the court. The biggest game we ever won was the Sweet 16. Despite the twin NBA towers of Hill and Strong, Jumpin Jamal Walker was the game MVP.
Lionel will split the point with Finn, and also slide over to play some 2 guard. His contribution to this team is critical to our Final Four run. LC is going to come up big, and I am talking huge. Do not deny the L-Train.
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Replies:
- I agree with your solid analyses. I love how Lenny sunk UC with the infamous shot & how LC sunk Toledo with his last second beauty. Lenny will alway be a favorite of mine. Yet, I think LC plays more "in control" and will lead us to the elite 8. I wonder what LB & LC similar turnover ratios were/are? (NT) -- NO JUSTCE! NO PEACE!, 13:45:10 09/05/02 Thu
- I think your points are strong. In your reply you mentioned what I was wondering: turnovers. My only gripe with LC is that he isn't really much of a point guard. I think of him as a 1.5 guard. He is a point guard who seems to think his role is to score. And I will not be overly critical of him, becuase it is his scoring that is easily his best asset. I would prefer to see more assists and less turnovers, even if it meant he didn't score quite as much. (NT) -- XU Fan, 14:23:41 09/05/02 Thu
- Are you the same guy that doted on Young as the next phenom? Take a position and stick with it. At the end of the year, you'll be saying 'I told you so' regardless of who carries them. (NT) -- DonalD, 13:52:40 09/06/02 Fri
- Lenny and Lionel have very similar games. I think that Lionel is quicker though, and will end up a better shooter. I think that he has more upside. Lenny Brown was a hell of a player though. He was a gamer. That is what I like about both of them. (NT) -- Holden Wilson, 18:56:37 09/06/02 Fri
- Mugshot....Lenny Brown vs Lloyd Price (NT) -- Simon Lease, 08:05:30 09/09/02 Mon
- Waaaaaaaghghghhhhhhhhhhhh! Mommy! Why does everyone think X fans are whingers? (NT) -- Hush, now. It's easy; we are., 07:04:10 09/10/02 Tue
- When Lenny Brown played, the A-10 was stronger. Lionel is playing against poorer competition. Lenny was more of a threat. (NT) -- xukeith, 22:31:29 09/11/02 Wed
- When Lenny Brown played, the A-10 was stronger. Lionel is playing against poorer competition. Lenny was more of a threat. (NT) -- xukeith, 22:31:30 09/11/02 Wed
- A whinger is a British term, properly spelled, that means a whiner. Will depart for smackville. (NT) -- Thad, 08:00:17 09/12/02 Thu
- Where in the world is.........? -- THE TRUTH, 22:39:56 09/11/02 Wed
Where in the hell has the skillet been?
THE TRUTH WILL SET YOU FREE
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- Time to remember - -- Pablo, 11:52:55 09/11/02 Wed
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- Take a moment...and remember -- jaxalum, 20:25:38 09/09/02 Mon
An American
The following was said to be written by a dentist in Australia.
An American
"You probably missed it in the rush of news last week, but there was actually a report that someone in Pakistan had published in a newspaper an offer of a reward to anyone who killed an American, any American. So I just thought I would write to let them know what an American is, so they would know when they found one.
An American is English, French, Italian, Irish, German, Spanish, Polish, Russian or Greek. An American may also be Mexican, African, Indian, Chinese, Japanese, Australian, Iranian, Asian, Arab, Pakistani, or Afghan. An American may also be a Cherokee, Osage, Blackfoot, Navaho, Apache, or one of the many other tribes known as native Americans.
An American is Christian, or he could be Jewish, Buddhist, or Muslim. In fact, there are more Muslims in America than in Afghanistan. The only difference is that in America they are free to worship as each of them chooses. An American is also free to believe in no religion. For that he will answer only to God, not to the government, or to armed thugs claiming to speak for the government and for God.
An American is from the most prosperous land in the history of the world. The root of that prosperity can be found in the Declaration of Independence, which recognizes the God given right of each man and woman to the pursuit of happiness.
An American is generous. Americans have helped out just about every other nation in the world in their time of need. When Afghanistan was overrun by the Soviet army 20 years ago, Americans came with arms and supplies to enable the people to win back their country. As of the morning of September 11, Americans had given more than any other nation to the poor in Afghanistan. The best products, the best books, the best music, the best food, the best athletes.
Americans welcome the best, but they also welcome the least. The national symbol of America welcomes your tired and your poor, the wretched refuse of your teeming shores, the homeless, tempest tossed. These in fact are the people who built America. Some of them were working in the Twin Towers in the morning of September 11, earning a better life for their families. [I've been told that the people in the Towers were from at least 30, and maybe many more, other countries, cultures, and first languages, including those that aided and abetted the terrorists.]
So you can try to kill an American if you must. Hitler did. So did General Tojo, and Stalin, and Mao Tse-Tung, and every bloodthirsty tyrant in the history of the world. But, in doing so you would just be killing yourself. Because Americans are not a particular people from a particular place. They are the embodiment of the human spirit of freedom. Everyone who holds to that spirit, everywhere, is an American.
So look around you. You may find more Americans in your land than you thought were there. One day they will rise up and overthrow the old, ignorant, tired tyrants that trouble too many lands. Then those lands, too, will join the community of free and prosperous nations. And America will welcome them!
Pass this around the World!
GOD BLESS OUR WONDERFUL NATION
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- Some of you need to grow up -- Voice of reason, 22:45:04 09/05/02 Thu
OK, I know I'll get slammed for posting this but whatever. No big deal. I just would like to know why all the venom directed at X-Band. And beyond that, why get all bent out of shape because of a fellow X fan and his passion for the school? In short, grow the fuk up. Most of you are in your late 20s and 30s, right? And you're telling X-Band to go get laid or get a hobby? Look in the mirror. I mean damn, it's just an Internet msg board. You get pissed b/c X-Band posts something about the women's team? God, get over it. I hate to say it, but this is an example of why UC fans call us arrogant pricks. We can't even get along with each other. When I was at Xavier we had this shit all the time. Immature people who would just belligerently attack people for some stupid reason. X-Band is a huge Xavier fan. What the hell's wrong with that? I know most of you are here to just have a little fun and that's cool, but getting all worked up over someone posting on a message board is pretty stupid. I'm not so much advocating X-Band or coming to his defense; it's more of my displeasure with some of the stupidity I see on this board and others. We jump all over "Duke Fan" for being a belligerent moron but then turn around and pounce on a fellow X fan because he was in the band and posts a lot. Big f'in' deal. Get over it. Grow up. That's all. Sorry to be a wet blanket, but I thought it crossed the line from fun to outright immature and cruel. Live and let live. Have a little fun but don't act like an 8-yr-old in the process. Peace.
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Replies:
- First of all if you are going to light people up - you should have the balls to post your monniker, second - X-Band is a big boy - it is cute that you are coming to his aid - but this is what contributes to X-Band getting shit, he is young - he thinks that he needs to respond to every post and you might not remember this (b/c who knows who you are) but X-Band has dished it out as well - he banned myself and other cartel members and flew off the handle a couple times. So let X-band fight his battles - don't blast people without your name and from an AOL account - and lets talk Xavier Basketbal (NT) -- Pablo, 09:49:03 09/06/02 Fri
- And as a sign of mercy - I deleted the post from Gary Griffin talking about how X-Band needs a hobby or need to get laid b/c Gary emailed me and said he did not post it, (NT) -- Pablo, 09:50:58 09/06/02 Fri
- What the hell does it matter who I am? -- John Doe, John Deere. John Holmes....who cares, 10:06:09 09/06/02 Fri
- Point well taken - this is also the offseason and for the first time in a couple years - there isn't a board war - so this year it is a Poster war - last year there was back and forth about Me Vs Gary - people took sides - shit was talked about both of us - and then the season started and all was forgotten. We need the season to start and all this will be over. (NT) -- Pablo, 10:42:42 09/06/02 Fri
- It does matter who you are, and if you are a part of the active community. Having a worthwhile message board does not just happen. The board needs to draw people in, keep their attention, and encourage people to post in order to keep it alive. If 95 percent of the active contributors are turned off by an individual and stop posting, but 100 percent of the 'lurkers' enjoy that persons post, what you are left with is nothing. (cont.) (NT) -- BP, 11:23:39 09/06/02 Fri
- (cont) See X-band's failed board (you can't anymore, he finally shut it down) as an example. Only X-band was posting there, and nobody cared. People with true insight and connections to info didn't want to read it because it was boring, so they stopped going. Then, there was no new info, so everyone else stopped going. You can kill a message board, and the Band Boy has already done it once, singlehandedly. The point of the "ban the bland band boy" is to try to bring to his attention that his shit is getting real tired to a lot of the active contributors. (NT) -- BP, 11:29:15 09/06/02 Fri
- So the reason it matters who you are is this: If you are NCH, or LH or any number of contributors, then your opinion carries heavy weight, and should be considered. If you are X-band, X-band's mom, or any lurker who "reads the board but never posts", then I don't give a shit what you think, because it won't make a diffference if you're gone. Experience would say that since you don't identify yourself, you're in the latter group. I have been a somewhat active participant since the original grandstand board on AOL. I don't think that means my opinion counts more, but I do know of what I speak. (NT) -- BP, 11:41:39 09/06/02 Fri
- Acually I am a long-time, active poster. The reason I did not identify myself is b/c the attacks would start on me, and that's just plain stupid. And don't say it wouldn't happen, b/c we all know it would. My point I was trying to get across has nothing to do with the messenger. (Cont) -- Me again, 12:19:46 09/06/02 Fri
- One more thing- Help me to understand why you rip people like X-Band for posting too much, but then you turn around and say those who lurk and don't ever post don't have an opinion that counts. You say you count b/c you have been an "active participant" but X-Band doesn't even though he is just as active. You catch my drift? You make no sense. The fact is, X-Band disagrees with you more often than not and you simply can't handle that. Your ego has to be fed and you have to always be right. Hence, X-Band becomes a target. Very cool. (NT) -- Snipe, BP, GMG, Muskieman, X-Man, UC Kevin, whatever, 12:32:26 09/06/02 Fri
- Actually, superfly weenie, I posted a brief defense of the band boy, although it was not particularly glowing, in an earlier thread, and I used my common moniker. I don't care if these guys rip me if I don't think the band boy should be banned. If you are not willing to get ripped, then you shouldn't post your opinion at all. You don't have to use your "real" name, but if you are a consistent poster, we pwople can at least gauge your opinion against a history of posts. For the record, I think the band boy is a moron, but I don't think he should be banned. (NT) -- Homeskillet, 13:11:16 09/06/02 Fri
- Voice of reason, it looks like you are taking some jabs at people yourself. Go figure. Why don't you take your own advice and grow up? You come here, drop your regular moniker, and adopt a new one just to slam people without recourse, all the while claiming to be the mature "voice of reason". Well, VOR, I don't care who you are. The band boy made his bed, and he will lay in it. Where were you when he called me an asshole unprovoked on the A-10 board? He really hurt my feelings that time. I really wish you were there to hold everyone's hand and think happy thoughts. Blow me. (NT) -- Snipe, 14:31:16 09/06/02 Fri
- For some reason, this didn't post earlier, but the fact is, I have no problem with the quantity of X-bands posts. It's the quality. Or total lack thereof. You say that I don't like him because we disagree. You couldn't be farther from the truth. X-band doesn't have the cojones to disagree. In a discussion that debated wether college athelets should be paid, X-band took the highly controversial position that the state of Ohio's system of funding elementary schools was unconstitutional. (NT) -- BP, 16:44:26 09/06/02 Fri
- Case in point. Go to the MM board and check out X-Bland's NIT preview shit. It's good. He breaks down the teams in quick capsules, strengths, weaknesses, etc. Informative, and he obviously spent some time on them. Nobody is reading them. Nobody is responding to them. I can only assume it is because I am not the only one who is so sick of reading his shit that I skip over it. There were more responses to Snipes LC/LB comparison on this board than to X-band exhaustive work on the PNIT on the other board. But does that stop him? Oh no.... he just keeps plugging away. (NT) -- BP, 17:04:54 09/06/02 Fri
- But frankly, if all of X-Blands 800 posts were as good as the PNIT ones, I would never give him shit, but the majority of his posts are not only inane and uninformative, like our friend homeskillets, but they lack any originality, humor, insight or controversial position. They suck in 3 dimensions. They are so alive with suckness that they actually distort the monitor with their suckittude. The previous barometer of suckcisity, measured in units of Anna Nicole Smithness, has been replaced by the Stalicameter. Brace yourselves, and get ready for some innovations in the world of suck. (NT) -- BP, 17:11:19 09/06/02 Fri
- Ok, voice. I understand that you don't approve of the approach I'm taking with the Bland Boy. Here's a news flash. I don't give a shit what you think. I can call X-bland whatever I want, and you can call me whatever you want, but you lose some credibility when you try to trash me for exactly the same kind of posts you are putting up. It's also pretty pathetic that X-Bland has to give his mommy his internet password so you can come on here and defend him. (NT) -- BP, 11:37:14 09/09/02 Mon
- My Bid For A Band Free Zone (More) -- Happy Humboldt, 14:59:47 09/06/02 Fri
- NJ!NP! arrested! -- Homeskillet, 14:58:39 09/09/02 Mon
Intruder Dons Girl's Underwear, Falls Asleep
Posted: 1:32 p.m. EDT August 27, 2002
BLUE HILL, Maine -- It was a shocking sight, to be sure. A homeowner in Blue Hill, Maine came home to find someone asleep in his bed, wearing just his daughter's pink underwear. And it wasn't Goldilocks.
The sheriff's department says the unidentified homeowner determined that someone had used his shower and then found Matthew Williams unconscious in his bed.
After being awakened, Williams ran from the house into the nearby woods, clad in nothing except the ill-fitting underwear.
Deputies later found Williams hiding in the bushes. They say he was drunk and also wanted for failure to appear in court.
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- HOMESKILLET ARRESTED! -- NO JUSTICE! NO PEACE!, 14:30:56 09/09/02 Mon
Man wearing cooler holds up store
Web posted Saturday, September 7, 2002
By Sylvia Cooper
Staff Writer
Columbia County sheriff's deputies escort Michael Steven Pavlich to the back of a police cruiser Friday morning. Authorities say Mr. Pavlich tried to rob the Circle K store off Furys Ferry Road near River Watch Parkway while wearing a plastic foam cooler on his head to cover his face.
A Martinez man who police say tried to rob a convenience store Friday morning with a cooler on his head is instead cooling his heels in jail.
Michael Steven Pavlich, 48, of the 4400 block of Pierwood Way, was arrested and charged with criminal attempted armed robbery shortly after police said he tried to rob the Circle K store at 216 Furys Ferry Road about 8:30 a.m., according to a Richmond County Sheriff's Office report.
Deputies said Mr. Pavlich entered the store and took a plastic foam cooler, punched a hole in it so he could see, placed it on his head and approached the counter. The clerk said she heard him say something but could not make out the words because of the cooler.
A witness told police a man came around the counter and said something that sounded like "everybody get your hands up." When he saw that the man was armed with only a pellet pistol, he took it from him and pushed him out of the store, the report stated
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- TSD & The Bland Band Boy -- Muff Muncher, 00:22:57 09/04/02 Wed
Some guy named Irwin Fletcher is planning a homage to The Sprinkler Dork. He must be stopped. The Cartel must begin to flex it's muscle. An once of prevention and all that jazz. If we let this go, other people might start backing him. We have to crush their will, and make them submit to our demands. Also, something needs to be done about the Band Boy. He needs a bitch slapping in a bad way. We should erect a "Band Free Zone" around this sacred forum. Band geeks can't hang.
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Replies:
- X-band's board -- Homeskillet, 12:28:57 09/05/02 Thu
I just tried to click on X-band's Xavier board, having been reminded of its existence by those of you who have turned your malicious gaze to him, and I got a message that said it didn't even exist anymore. When did this happen? Where can I get updates on women's soccer now? Where can I read about X-band's misadventures, shenanigans and hijinks? How could this have happenned?
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- We will not be rendered helpless by a baseball strike -- Homeskillet, 15:11:36 08/29/02 Thu
YOUR HELP IS NEEDED!!!!
Since September 11, 2001, Americans have come together as never before in our generation. We have banded together to overcome tremendous adversity. We have weathered direct attacks on our own soil, wars overseas, corporate scandal, layoffs, employment, stock price plunges, droughts, fires, and a myriad of economic and physical disasters both great and small. But now, we must come together once again to overcome our greatest challenge yet.
Hundreds of Major League Baseball players in our very own nation are living at, just below, or in most cases far above the seven-figure salary level. And as if that weren't bad enough they could be deprived of their life-giving pay for several months, possibly longer, as a result of the upcoming strike situation. But you can help!
For only $20,835 a month, about $694.50 a day (that's less than the cost of a large screen projection TV) you can help a MLB player remain economically viable during his time of need. This contribution by no means solves the problem as it barely covers the annual minimum salary, but it's a
start, and every little bit will help!
Although $700 may not seem like a lot of money to you, to a baseball player it could mean the difference between spending the strike golfing in Florida or on a Mediterranean cruise. For you, seven hundred dollars is nothing more than a month's rent, half a mortgage payment, two unemployment checks, or a month of medical insurance with COBRA, but to a baseball player, $700 will partially replace his daily salary. Your commitment of less than $700 a day will enable a player to buy that home entertainment center, trade in the year-old Lexus for a new Ferrari, or enjoy a weekend in Rio.
HOW WILL I KNOW I'M HELPING?
Each month, you will receive a complete financial report on the player you sponsor. Detailed information about his stocks, bonds, 401(k), real estate, and other investment holdings will be mailed to your home. Plus, upon signing up for this program, you will receive an unsigned photo of the
player lounging during the strike on a beach somewhere in the Caribbean (for a signed photo, please include an additional $150). Put the photo on your refrigerator to remind you of other peoples' suffering.
HOW WILL HE KNOW I'M HELPING?
Your MLB player will be told that he has a SPECIAL FRIEND who just wants to help in a time of need. Although the player won't know your name, he will be able to make collect calls to your home via a special operator in
case additional funds are needed for unforeseen expenses.
YES, I WANT TO HELP!
I would like to sponsor a striking MLB player. My preference is checked below:
[ ] Infielder
[ ] Outfielder
[ ] Starting Pitcher
[ ] Ace Pitcher
[ ] Entire team (Please call our 900 number to ask for the cst of a specific team - $10 per minute)
[ ] Alex Rodriguez (Higher cost: $60,000 per day)
Please charge the account listed below $694.50 per day for the player for the duration of the strike.
Please send me a picture of the player I have sponsored, along with an Alex Rodriguez 2001 Income Statement and my very own Donald Fehr MLB Players Union pin to wear proudly on my hat (include $80 for hat).
Your Name: _______________________
Telephone Number: ____________________
Account Number: _____________________
Exp.Date:_______
[ ] MasterCard [ ] Visa [ ] American Express [ ] Discover
Signature: _______________________
Alternate card (when the primary card exceeds its credit limit):
Account Number:_____________________Exp.Date:_______
[ ] MasterCard [ ] Visa [ ] American Express [ ] Discover
Signature: _______________________
Mail completed form to MLB Players Union or call 1-900-F-K-THE-FANS now to enroll by phone ($10 per minute).
Disclaimer: Sponsors are not permitted to contact the player they have sponsored, either in person or by other means including, but not limited to, telephone calls, letters, e-mail, or third parties. Contributions are
not tax-deductible.
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Replies:
- Coincidence? -- THE BOB HUGGINS POLITICAL MACHINE, 21:00:16 08/30/02 Fri
Bob Huggins was out at his golf outing in the same week that Ted Froncek was quoted in this article (http://www.cincypost.com/2002/aug/22/little082202.html) about Donald Little's chances of being a Bearcat.
Bob Huggins, at his recent golf outing, publicly stated that as long as he was the coach of the Cincinnati Bearcats, Donald Little would never again play for the team. I guess that ends any speculation that might have been left. This was not Bob's stance over the course of the summer, when Donald Little was working out at the Shoe and helping with Bob Huggins basketball camp. He was even showing new recruits around...get a load of that. What a great salesman for the University, a soon to be convicted felon.
On June 16, this is what Mike OfCoursey of The Sporting News had this to say about Donald's chances "It's possible you haven't seen the last of Cincinnati C Donald Little. He was dismissed from the program after being charged with assault, but word is the case against him is weakening as a July 1 hearing approaches. He could return to the Bearcats if cleared. . . .
Mike OfCoursey used to be the beat writer for the UC Bearcats for the Enquirer. He knows Bob Huggins and is a friend of Bob Huggins. Mike gets his information directly from the source. It isn't like he is a court reporter. He doesn't have contacts at the Hamilton County justice center, he has contacts at UC. For Mike to report that news in The Sporting News, he had to be getting his info from Bob Huggins and the coaching staff.
Lets face it, Bob Huggins was only sure that Donald Little would never be a Bearcat once he found out from Ted Froncek that Donald had no chance of pleading it out and making the serious charges go away. Then, and only then, did mighty fat Bob state unequivocally that Donald Little would never return. I like the way he makes a stand for his so called "Integrity" after the dust has already cleared. You didn't hear him say that after Mike OfCoursey's June 16th article. Why is that?
The worst part may be that of Little Attourney Ted Froncek. When I first read his statments to the press, I wondered what was was thinking. Some excerpts:
"Ted Froncek, Little's attorney, said Thursday that the chances were remote that Little would ever be a Bearcat again."
"The official position from the university is, "You're off the team,' " Froncek said. "Donald doesn't have to play basketball because he's graduated and has a degree (but) he is thinking very hard about European basketball. There's some money in that.''
Froncek was not the original attorney on the case. He became Little's attorney once it appeared that they could get Little back. He is the front man of the UC legal defense team, and he has tried other cases for UC players. He knows about Little's chances for being a Bearcat again because he stays in close contact with the program. He isn't paid by Little, but I suspect he isn't defending all these UC basketball players out of the goodness of his heart either. It would be interesting to see what other pro bono cases he takes, and where his seats are at the Shoemaker Center. Most attorneys wouldn't make their first public comment in a case like this on the subject of UC Basketball. His client has put in a plea of not guilty, and his job is to defend his client. Apparently, he spends a lot of his time staying in touch with the program.
"Potentially, (Little) could be playing for the Ohio Department of Corrections basketball team next year,'' Froncek said."
I never understood this statment. If anything, it hurts Donald Little. Little has claimed to be innocent. Though guilty as hell, what lawyer in his right mind talks to the media like this? If Little does not plea, this case goes to trial. If they select a jury, how many perspective candidates just read his lawyer joking about him playing in the correctional league. If he was Little's paid attourney, he would be fired. Shouldn't he instead be commenting on how his client maintains his innocence? But he is the UC lawman, not the Little lawman. Once it became evident that the State of Ohio wasn't playing along, Donald Little became expendable. Froncek and Huggins could give a fuck about Little now, because Little can do nothing for him.
That means that Donald will have to find a new way to make the payments on his new ride, and his new pad in Tri-County. I never really realized how much a guy could make by working the Huggins basketball camp and playing in the summer league. It doesn't matter anymore where Donald got his money, because that money will be going away. Much like Donald Little himself.
The same thing is true for Justin Hodge. Everything that was promised him will now go away. The people that were willing to "help" him will care no more.
I don't care about Little being betrayed by his UC frontman, because Little is a violent criminal who is a threat to society. I am just amused at how fast they dropped the kid when they realized the no win situation. It makes me laugh to hear Huggins talk about Little never coming back as if it was always the case. Had Froncek forged an acceptable deal on the 23rd, Little would be back today.
BOB HUGGINS HAS NO INTEGRITY
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- waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah, uc kicked our ass again. (NT) -- the world, 10:45:22 08/31/02 Sat
- I love cheese. (NT) -- The pen is mightier than the sword, 00:35:19 09/01/02 Sun
- What pisses you off is the fact that Xavier always, that's ALWAYS comes in second in Cincinnati. You just can't stand being second fiddle to the red and black. You get your little X panties all in a bunch and spew venom; you hold your breath until you turn ugzavier blue and what does it get you? Another NIT appearance and another year in a crap league. (NT) -- Romaine Iceberg, 08:09:03 09/02/02 Mon
- Is your banner ready for today's football game? (NT) -- Nippert Stadium, 12:59:40 09/02/02 Mon
- This has nothing to do with UC vs. XU. It has nothing to do with college basketball. It has everything to do with a slimeball and how he treats people. This is about right and wrong and Huggins is wrong. He has no integrity and is a piece of shit. UC fans are blind to that. He is like Hitler in 1920's Germany. Heil Huggins! (NT) -- UC idiots are blind, 11:03:59 09/03/02 Tue
- What is really interesting about this story is that the Xavier women's tennis team was defeated in the A-10 championship on April 21st. I also love the WNBA, but I don't have cable or friends. (NT) -- X-Bland '01, 18:16:38 09/03/02 Tue
- Waaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhgghhh! We're out here. We're a real team too. We're not mid-major! We're not, we're not, we're not.............MMommmmmyyyyyy! Where's my tuition check and my milk money? Have you seen my penny loafers? Can I stay late and go to Science Club? Waaaaaaaghhhhhhh. (NT) -- xavier pussies, 08:09:36 09/04/02 Wed
- Hey ya'll, I'm down here in Corncob County, Kentucky on a recruitin' trip , and well, I uh got hammered last night at the Win, Place , Show Lounge, and uh......aw, hell! I can't find my tractor. Do any of you know where I parked the damn thing? It's kinda big , and kinda green and has these big ole muddy tars on it. if ya can help me out I'll get ya four tickets to our NIT appearance. Thanks. Oh, yeah, and I'll make 'em tix to the first game cause with us it's one and done. -- Thad, 11:21:34 09/02/02 Mon
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- I love this doctor's name -- Homeskillet, 14:53:48 08/29/02 Thu
Man arraigned in case of castration gone wrong
August 24, 2002
BY MATT HELMS
FREE PRESS STAFF WRITER
A Taiwanese national living in Oak Park was arraigned Friday on charges related to a voluntary castration he performed on a Birmingham man.
Shuo-Shan Wang, 29, was arraigned in Oak Park District Court on one count of practicing medicine without a license and one count of unlawfully dispensing a prescription drug. The medical-license charge is a felony, which carries up to four years in prison upon conviction. The drug charge is a misdemeanor with a maximum penalty of 90 days in jail.
Oakland County prosecutors said the 48-year-old Birmingham man, whose identity hasn't been released by police, contacted the would-be surgeon through the Internet. Wang told police he had performed castrations on other men in Michigan and in his former home in Australia.
Both men said they were eating after the procedure, which had been performed on Wang's kitchen table, when the castrated man began to bleed after laughing. The bleeding couldn't be stopped.
Prosecutors said a neighbor notified authorities, who found the man sitting in blood-soaked jeans on a curb on Northfield Street. Police later found two testicles in a container in Wang's refrigerator.
Psychiatry experts say such incidents are rare, but some men want to be castrated for erotic reasons. There are Web sites devoted to the subject. Experts say other reasons include gender-identity disorders and compulsive feelings that genitals are dirty.
Oakland County Deputy Prosecutor Jim Halushka said the Birmingham man might have bled to death had the neighbor not called police. The man later underwent emergency surgery at Providence Hospital in Southfield.
"The whole purpose of the statute of practicing medicine without a license is really illustrated in this case," Halushka said.
Wang "doesn't have a license. He's not equipped to handle a problem when it arises," he said.
Halushka said Wang has overstayed a student visa by more than a year, and immigration authorities have been notified.
Wang couldn't be reached immediately for comment.
A pretrial conference was scheduled for Sept. 3.
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- Another X recruit can't make grades!How Many does this Make? -- X hater, 23:39:39 08/27/02 Tue
Posey Mcintosh Young Chalmers Caudle!Sure there's more!
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- I'm scared -- Homeskillet, 14:27:07 08/27/02 Tue
Woman says airport security guard forced her to drink her own breast milk
Associated Press
NEW YORK -- A woman says a security guard at Kennedy Airport forced her to drink from three bottles of her own breast milk to demonstrate the liquid posed no threat to other passengers.
Elizabeth McGarry, 40, said the incident occurred April 2 as she was boarding a Delta flight for Miami with her infant daughter. She called it "embarrassing and disgusting."
The federal agency in charge of post-Sept. 11 airline security said it is investigating. But the security guard's demand would have been within federal guidelines at the time. The policy has since been changed.
Civil rights attorney Ronald Kuby, who fielded a call Wednesday from McGarry on his radio talk show, ridiculed the notion that anyone could have suspected the Long Island woman of being a terrorist.
"The number of middle-aged, lactating white women who passed through al-Qaida training is probably negligible," he said.
Kuby said the suburban woman is not looking to sue over the incident.
"She's primarily concerned this doesn't happen to somebody else," Kuby said. "She does feel the people who did this were plain stupid, and should be punished in some way."
McGarry and her daughter were pulled out of the boarding line for a random search. Guards examined her shoes, searched her baby and went through her diaper bag, Kuby said.
"None of that bothered her," Kuby said. "Only when she was ordered to drink the breast milk did she fail to see the connection to stopping terrorism."
The male guard was employed by a private company.
At the time, screeners were permitted to have passengers drink from containers, said Transportation Security Administration spokesman Sebastian Warren. That policy was changed on June 24, he said.
"In light of this unfortunate incident, the TSA is redoubling its efforts to ensure that both private-sector and federal screeners uniformly and consistently apply this policy," Warren said.
AND HERE'S WHY THE SKILLET IS SCARED: THIS STORY KIND OF TURNED ME ON.
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- Funny little exchange with some UC trash -- Pablo, 00:02:29 08/27/02 Tue
I went on the UC board today for the first time in forever and I was struck by just how little traffic they have - the board is a shell of what the old den used to be.
Regardless - I felt the need to post the great post from the Bob Huggins Political Machine regarding Donald Little. Needless to say it drew a little controversy and was relegated to the Smack portion (if possible that portion has even less traffic than the regular board) Check it out;
The UC Trash Website
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- Long Winded on Donald Little -- THE BOB HUGGINS POLITICAL MACHINE, 11:18:46 08/26/02 Mon
Looks like Donald Little's chances for playing at UC have turned sour. Nice article in The Post the other day after his last continuance.
Donald Little is hoping for a plea bargain. What breaking news! I could have told you that months ago. The reason that he is still hoping is that he hasn't been given the option. Thank God someone in this town is doing their job.
In an earlier article, Donald proclaimed that the charges were false.
“It's been really tough,” said an upbeat Little, who got a nice ovation when he received awards as the team's leading rebounder and shot blocker. “I'm still fighting. The story's so screwed up. It's not true. Now I've got to go to court, fight it out, and I should come out on top. I've got faith.” .... “People who know me know I didn't do it,” he said. “It's false. It's a long story.”
Funny how now you don't hear Donald Little proclaiming innocence anymore. Funny how he doesn't appear to have the will to "fight it out" to clear his good name. They aren't even acting like he didn't do it now, they are just making a final desperate appeal for him to play basketball. That is pathetic. The last article talks about how tough things are for poor Donald. He can't leave the country because he might have to spend years in jail for attempting to kill a man. Poor, poor Donald.
All he wants to do is plead it out. No way he wants this case to go to trial. If convicted, Donald could get up to 26 years in jail. Those are tough odds, and all the evidence is stacked against him. I would ask for a continuance as well. Every continuance gives his lawyer a chance to talk to the prosecutor, to try to make a deal. If they were willing to deal, the case would have been long over. Since they have been unwilling to give in to Donald's wishes, his lawyer has taken the issue to the press, in a final pathetic attempt to help his client. I think the article hurt Little more than anything, but the motives of his attorney are surely otherwise.
Donald Little would be back on the team had his attorney been able to work out a deal. He worked Bob Huggins' basketball camp all summer, and has been working out at the Shoe in his spare time. The only thing that he needed was the plea bargain that dismisses all of his felonies. He hasn't gotten it, and it appears as though he is fighting a losing battle.
Donald was very comfortable over the summer. At the summer league, he talked about coming back in the fall. He said it was a done deal. He got a new pad in tri county, and a new ride. He must have gotten a raise. Justin Hodge, the victim, disappeared from the Cincinnati scene. Nobody in the media ever noticed.
An interesting part of the story that never made the papers went this way: A coat hanger was heated up and wrapped around Hodge's neck. The animals put him in a bathtub and tied his neck to the faucet. They then proceeded to drop weights on his face. They smashed out his teeth and broke his jaw. Hodge had to have his jaw wired shut. How would you like to have all your meals through a straw? But Justin left town, and none of those gory details ever made the papers. I guess one line said that they had dropped weights on his head, but they never provided the graphic detail. In a society where news crews race to accident scenes to provide "exclusive first on the scene footage", it surprises me that they would omit those details. Instead, the paper printed an article that had people commenting on what a nice guy Donald is. The Political Machine must have been working overtime.
According to my sources, Justin Hodge was offered $25,000.00 by a UC booster to let it go and walk away. Hodge dropped out of sight, and hasn't been heard of since. Nobody in the media has thought to seek him for a comment in this case. The problem for Donald Little is that he is charged with a felony, and those are serious. Justin Hodge cannot by himself drop the charges.
In Hamilton County, the prosecutor will drop a misdemeanor case if the victim wants to drop it. A felony case is different. It is the State of Ohio against Donald Little, not just Justin Hodge. I believe that Hodge was willing to let it slide, and he accepted the offer from the booster. That probably prompted Mike OfCoursey's midsummer article commenting on how the case against Little had grown weaker. Hodge is no longer wanting to nail him.
Why am I sure that Hodge has backed off? He is my proof: Say that you are Justin Hodge. Donald Little busted your fucking jaw and smashed out all of your teeth. He tied you up and cut you. He beat you with all manner of things. He threatened to kill you, and just may have if you hadn't escaped. Little is on trial and he could go upstate for up to 26 years. All of the sudden they are publicly appealing for a plea bargain that drops all the charges to minor crimes. What would you do? Where is Justin Hodge's outrage? What prosecutor would even sit in the room and listen to the argument for pleading this down if his victim wanted justice? Those prosecutors tend to have political and/or career aspirations. Trading a victims demand for justice so that a 24 year old career criminal can play basketball would make them look like shit. Hodge has to be playing along, or they wouldn't even dare mention it to the media. Speaking of the media, where is Justin Hodge's reaction to little having these serious crimes dismissed to misdemeanors? It isn't there. Why not? Just another case of great investigative reporting by our local rags.
I hope that Hodge got his money up front. The State of Ohio does not appear to be willing to compromise and dismiss the serious crimes from this case. They shouldn’t. Donald Little is a repeat violent offender. Donald Little is a threat to society. Donald Little deserves to go to jail. His basketball career looks to be over, and with that final stroke, nobody needs Justin Hodge anymore. Once Donald is worthless to the boosters, Justin Hodge also becomes worthless. If Hodge doesn’t have his money yet, I am thinking that he will never see that money. I would never wish what happened to Justin Hodge to anyone, but in selling out, Justin Hodge probably received exactly what he deserves. It would be funny if he never got his payoff.
One way or another, Donald Little will never let this case go to trial. He can’t afford to do that. His goal was never to win this case. He can’t win. Too much evidence is stacked against the animal. His goal was to play basketball again, and that will change. His new goal will be to get out of an extended stay in the joint. He can probably plead to a felony and spend a few months in jail. If he goes to trial, he could be locked up for 26 years. You do the math. I could spend a month in jail, if the jail was full of other guys that were also in for a month or so, not the hard core butt fuckers up state. Spending 5 years with those ass manglers would change anyone’s perspective on life, and not in a good way. Even a hard core violent felon like Donald Little doesn’t what that.
Too bad we will never get a trial. To the media, Little can always offer no comment. In a court, he would have to address the issues, including the origin of the $2,500 that started the whole incident. I am dying to know his official, on the record excuse for that. That school is as crooked as they come, and they did everything in their power to get him back in black for the fall.
This time, though, it appears that the Bob Huggins political machine has failed. I don’t think that big Don is coming back. For the first time in awhile, UC won’t be allowed to make it all go away.
BOB HUGGINS HAS NO INTEGRITY
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- Dance Team auditions are next week - an early peek at the competition -- Pablo, 15:37:45 08/23/02 Fri
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- Beer Belly saves life -- Homeskillet, 14:47:22 08/22/02 Thu
A Birmingham, England, man who was attacked with a power saw says his beer belly probably saved his life. Shaun Reaney, who weighs 22 stone (about 308 pounds), is recovering in hospital after being slashed across the stomach.
Reaney suffered an 18-inch wound when he was attacked by four men. His beer belly kept the blade of a circular saw from touching his internal organs.
"It's a good job I had that layer to protect me," he told a local newspaper. His wife, Theresa, added: "The doctors told me if he had been 10 stone lighter he would have died. When Shaun came round he reminded me that years of boozing had saved his life."
ALL HAIL THE POWER OF BEER!
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- French Video Game -- Homeskillet, 15:46:11 08/22/02 Thu
Paris - Inspired by the commercial success of the United States Army’s "Boot Camp" video game, the General Staff of the French Army has announced plans to market "Ultimate Surrender," a video game based upon the proud military traditions of the Gauls.
In the game we follow the exploits of Lucky Pierre, an apprentice garlic salesman from Marseilles, as he joins the French Army and begins a rigorous course of combat training. The First Level of the game is called "Survival School," and the players have to help Lucky Pierre survive 24 hours without red wine or crème brulé. The Second Level is "Capitulation," and the goal here is to see which player can have Lucky Pierre surrender the fastest without firing a shot or getting his uniform dirty. Level Three is "Collaboration." Here the players battle to see who can collect the largest numbers of pairs of nylon stockings and packages of chocolates by having Lucky Pierre perform sexual favors for members of the occupying forces. Level Four is "Be Ungrateful to America for Rescuing Your Sorry French Ass Once Again." In this extremely challenging part of the game contestants vie with one another to see who can make Lucky Pierre behave in the surliest manner when the United States inevitably comes to the rescue of the defeated French. The Final Level is "Pretending to Have Been in the Resistance." Here contestants compete in a battle of tall tales and whoppers as they try to protect Lucky Pierre from treason charges.
Marketing tests show that "Ultimate Surrender" is a big hit with French teenagers and young adults who are too young to have experienced France’s lightening surrender to the Germans in 1940 or its defeat by the Vietnamese in 1954 at Dien Bien Phu. "Zees is a great tool to inspire ze patriotism in ze youths, n’est ce pas?" said General Jean-Jacques Loseur, Commander-in-Chief of the French Army, during his weekly press conference. "Since ze end of ze Cold War we French have not had many opportunities to surrender or to show great cowardice in the face of much weaker opponents."
When questioned about comments made in the French Chamber of Deputies that "Ultimate Surrender" makes the French Army look like a bunch of gutless mama’s boys, General Loseur pulled out a white handkerchief, put his hands over his head and said, "Oh heck, I give up."
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- "It was an accident" -- BP, 10:46:34 08/22/02 Thu
HOUSTON, Texas (AP) -- Suspecting her husband of having an affair, Clara Harris did what wealthy wives can afford to do: She hired an investigator. But what the private eye saw could become Exhibit A against Harris herself.
As the investigator's video camera rolled, an enraged Harris allegedly killed her husband in a parking lot by running him over three times with her silver Mercedes-Benz and leaving the car parked on top of him. The victim's 16-year-old daughter was in the passenger seat.
"It was an accident," Harris, a 44-year-old dentist, told reporters after her arrest on murder charges.
The episode happened outside a hotel after Harris confronted her orthodontist husband, David, and got into a screaming fight with the alleged other woman.
Bobbi Bacha of Blue Moon Investigations said the detective agency turned over to police a videotape that contains "all of the activities and movements of the subject to the very end."
Harris' attorney, George Parnham, said last week that she will plead innocent at her August 23 arraignment. She remains free on $30,000 bail.
Detective hired day husband died
Parnham, who unsuccessfully defended Andrea Yates, the Houston mother who claimed insanity after drowning her five children in the bathtub, suggested that this case, too, would hinge on the defendant's state of mind.
"Obviously, something triggered what happened," Parnham said. "This was not an act that was anyway akin to the mentality of Clara Harris. We have a professional person who is very intelligent. When you see the man that you love in the arms of someone else -- that has to have such a deep emotional impact on you."
Harris had hired Blue Moon Investigations on the very day her 44-year-old husband was killed. But before the investigator could confirm her suspicions, she showed up unexpectedly at the suburban hotel where her husband of 10 years had gone with one of his employees, Gail Bridges. The investigator had David Harris under surveillance at the time.
Witnesses said Clara Harris got into a fight with Bridges in the lobby, ripping the woman's shirt off, and announced that her husband was having an affair with Bridges. David Harris and about 10 hotel employees tried to pull the two women apart.
Daughter was in the car
Security guards escorted David Harris and Bridges outside. Clara Harris, meanwhile, got into her 2001 four-door Mercedes S-Class 430. With tires squealing, she headed toward a crowd in the parking lot as alarmed hotel employees banged on the hood and tried to get her to stop, witnesses said.
"She jumped the median and ran over him three times," Nassau Bay police Lt. Joe M. Cashiola told the Houston Chronicle. "I saw the daughter lying on the ground, crying uncontrollably and sobbing. She had to watch her dad 5 feet from her, underneath the car, while they're putting her mom in handcuffs."
A witness, Angela Reyes, told the Chronicle that David Harris' teenage daughter from a previous marriage jumped out of the car and punched Clara Harris in the face. Clara Harris yelled toward her husband: "I'm so sorry! I love you! Keep breathing!"
Last week, the teenager's mother went to court to ask that David Harris' estate be placed in a trust for his children so it cannot be used by Clara Harris to defend herself or to profit from her husband's death.
Bridges' lawyer had no comment last week. At Bridges' two-story brown brick home, the shades were drawn and signs were posted along its walkway and driveway warning against trespassing.
The Harrises lived with their 3-year-old twin sons in a $560,000 white stone and brick mansion with a long, winding driveway on nearly four acres in the suburb of Friendswood. A woman who answered the door last week said Clara Harris had no comment.
Her dental office has reopened, but another dentist is seeing patients in her place.
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- Yet again! -- THE BOB HUGGINS POLITICAL MACHINE, 12:08:47 08/21/02 Wed
JUSTICE DELAYED IS JUSTICE DENIED!
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- Donald Little -- Gunther, 12:32:14 08/20/02 Tue
Is the trial date set for tomorrow? What time and court room?
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- A bounty for an enemy of the Cartel -- Pablo, 18:21:26 08/20/02 Tue
I am hereby placing a $50.00 bounty to the first person that gives the Sprinkler Dork an Atomic Wedgie (underpants over the head) while he is on the Cintas Screen. Also said winner will receive a $25.00 bonus if the Sprinkler Dork never does his Dork Dance again. NO offense if the Sprinkler Dork is actually HomeSkillet or BlueBlob - which have both been rumored. Also there will be another $25.00 bounty to anyone that can take a good picture of the Sprinkler Dork getting his comeuppance.
Good Luck and Happy Dork hunting
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- Homecoming game on Sunday? -- Pablo, 12:56:57 08/20/02 Tue
My sources tell me the Homecoming game is now Sunday afternoon. That is great that they are going to have a game - but not so great for out of town people (Cincinnati only has one direct flight to Colombia a day) anybody else think that XU dropped the ball by not having the game on Sat - like the previous homecoming games?
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- Pablo's favorite games -- Pablo, 13:05:53 08/20/02 Tue
My favorites -
Brown last second shot to beat #1 UC - had been at Dana's since about 3pm - made friends with the Miller people - our table didn't pay for a beer all night - guy wanted my resume after (found a note in my pocket the next day and didn't understood what it meant for a couple days) When the last second shot went up - and went in - there was at least five seconds of pure silence. Bedlam was an understatement - it went crazy - there was only about forty people in the bar (this was the first day of break) but it was packed within five minutes - I think the taps were on and pitchers flowed for a good hour - when the players walked in - the place was shaking. I woke up passed out on the kitchen table the next day - with lipstick on my shirt - still don't know who that victim was.
XU blow out of #1 UC - We "Shocked the world" - my fav part was when everyone went back to the Woods - four yokels from UC came in and started **** with Donny and the rest of the Norwood Cafe Cartel (jr. assoc/ social members) and the UC fans were winning - then the Woods staff turned the tides and proceeded to kick the holy hell out of those guys - Classy UC fans once again
My first Crosstown Shootout at the Gardens (93?) When X won - we were friends with Andre Smith and was escorted into the locker room as "his cousins" I am Colombian - not black - we proceeded to drink the majority of the gatorade and tried to give interviews to the local press. My friend then puked and then pissed his pants on the bus ride home - somehow he still hooked up.
I was so hungover my teeh hurt for the UMass game that NJNP talked about - great game.
But my favorite all time game was 1st round of NCAA's 97 I believe - at the Palace of Auburn Hills. NJNP was walking down the stairs right after UC got upset in the first game - I was lagging behind as I see some UC trash - in a very fetching Starter ensemble of All UC Sweats - push NJNP and Mutter something - NJNP wolloped him with a solid right hook - and the poor UC trash didn't see Pablo behind him when he picked on the Cartel - we beat the holy snot out of him. His 6'7 friend then came in and landed some glancing blows before we called for security - we told them how they jumped us - bystanders said that we started it - the cops asked for the UC trash's ID's (I said Kings Island Season Pass doesn't count) he refused to give his ID to the Cop b/c and I quote verbatim "If I give you my ID you will find out who I am and arrest me" - Genius - he got sent off to the pokey - they asked us for ID's and what happened - a lot of Yes sirs and no sirs - and they said, "Usually when people are in fights - we kick them both out - but you guys can stay and watch the next game (Xavier)" All in all we proved that you don't mess with the Cartel and UC trash belongs out in the parking lot.
All Hail the Cartel...
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- Tragic Passing -- Homeskillet, 17:57:43 08/19/02 Mon
As the unofficial patron of midgets everywhere, Homeskillet must sadly announce the passing of one Josh Ryan Evans on August 6, 2002. This exuberant young midget made his impact in his oh too short life, appearing as the young grinch in "The Grinch who Stole Christmas", a kid lawyer in Ally McBeal, and a doll that came to life at the behest of an evil witch in the soap opera passions (he can still be seen for the next four and a half years in flashback scenes on the soap opera). This young man, standing proud at 3'2" tall, was a true American hero. He also liked to dress up as Elvis and give shooters to hot li'l baby dolls:
"http://us.imdb.com/EGallery?source=hh&group=0262924&photo=V2T4303.jpg&path=pgallery&path_key=Evans,+Josh+Ryan"
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- Scientific evidence that it is still possible for X-Band to lose his V-chip -- BP, 13:35:14 08/19/02 Mon
They Needed a Study for This?
Mon Aug 19, 8:04 AM ET
LONDON (Reuters) - Want to be more attractive? Make sure those around you are having a drink.
British scientists have found even modest amounts of alcohol will make the opposite sex appear better-looking.
"We have carried out experiments which show that what is known in the trade as the 'beer-goggle effect' does actually exist," Barry Jones, professor of psychology at Glasgow University, told Reuters Monday.
The study of 120 male and female students found drinking up to four units of alcohol -- about two pints of beer or four glasses of wine -- increased the perceived attractiveness of members of the opposite sex by about 25 percent.
Jones said alcohol apparently stimulates a part of the brain called the nucleus accumbens, which judges facial attractiveness.
"There is a strong link between facial attractiveness and signals about the quality of a potential mate," Jones said.
The professor said the study had been prompted by the causal link between risky sex and alcohol consumption.
Its findings come at a time when young Britons are increasingly binge drinking, which has serious health risks.
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- Recent Picture of Musketeer Madness Staff Meeting -- Gary Griffin, 09:47:17 08/19/02 Mon
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- Prison Names -- Homeskillet, 14:17:19 08/15/02 Thu
After seeing the hip hop names post on the other board, I did a little playing around on the internet myself, and found a prison bitch name generator. These names are way to rated R for the other board. A brief selection of some of our more frequent posters prison bitch names:
Pablo Fruity Pebbles
NJ!NP! Count Suckula
The Truth He Whore (Manwhore should've got this)
BP Ass Mangler
Manwhore Stubby
Snipe Cock Sucker (no joke)
muskieman Sugar Plum Fairy
I personally feel that we all got robbed. My name was along the lines of Snipe's (mine was worse--Cock Gobbler).
Other names for frequent posters to the other board were as follows:
Gary Griffin Cum Bucket
XU Band '01 Cum Stain
1muskie hung muther
XU Fan Horse Hung Harry
Heavy D One Eyed Ogre (I couldn't leave da fool out)
I guess prison bitch names aren't supposed to be flattering. I guess I should never go to prison. Some potential prisoners from UC include:
Donald Little Towel Boy
BJ Grove Ugly Skank Bitch Twat
Bob Huggins Sweet Cheeks
And the University of Cincinnati itself got "double fisted".
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- My friend X-Band -- Band Guy, 11:31:29 08/10/02 Sat
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- The Dark Side -- Homeskillet, 16:50:11 08/13/02 Tue
Did anyone see that show about embarrassing parents? I think it was on MTV. The one I saw featured a kid around seventeen and his dad who was over the top into Star Wars. The kid had all but grown up and his dad was bothered that he had never developed an affinity for the Force. Anyway, to appease his dad, the kid agreed to accompany him on a trip to a Star Wars convention.
They showed kid and dad walking through the airport. Dad was all decked out in his Jedi gear, with plastic light saber at his side. Kid was walking several feet behind dad as people stopped dad several times to confirm that he was indeed a Jedi. The kid looked miserable.
Then they go to the convention. I'd always wondered how these guys decide which character they'll be. Apparently, it's a calling. The kid and dad are walking through all of these Darth Vaders, Skywalkers. Chewbaccas. Dad is chatting some of his compatriots up while kid tries to keep at least some semblance of sanity. One of the guys dad talks to is decked out in Storm trooper gear.
This is where the calling came in. The kid decided he thought the storm trooper gear looked kind of cool. The trooper told them that he had some extra gear, and invited dad and kid back to his room (the day I follow a storm trooper to his hotel room is the day I cease being the skillet). They went, and the guy really did have extra gear.
After the kid put on his get up, Dad lost it. Dad started crying. Remember, Dad is a jedi, so called fighter for the cause of the republic. Dad wails that he "never thought [kid] would give into the dark side." It was one of the funniest things I have ever seen.
As a post script, the dad (as jedi) hugged the kid (as storm trooper) and both started crying. Then the lonny with the extra stuff (storm trooper number 2) started crying because his dad never got how importnat the Force was to him. So you had a jedi and two storm troopers bawling. It was one crazy show.
ALL HAIL THE TRUE POWER OF THE DARK SIDE.
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- From the XU boardroom...(re: Thad's new contract) -- NO JUSTICE! NO PEACE!, 12:16:43 07/30/02 Tue
I thought all would find the following information interesting:
* XU officials believe we will have a big run this year and feel a Sweet 16 and even an Elite 8 is within our grasp
* They feel Thad will be an even hotter commodity than ever (duh).
* XU administrators proactively approached Thad.
* Xavier gave Thad a nice bump in jack.
* They also inserted a “poison pill” that includes significant financial penalties if another college wants to buy Thad’s contract out.
* Thad was a full participant in the negotiations and fully understood the reasoning behind the strategy
* They expect all home games to be sold out
I also had a chance to review Thad’s contract and thought you would enjoy the details:
* XU officials will severely limit Thad accessibility to all non big rollers and make all interactions with him more exclusive in order to try to raise more bucks
* Thad will now only answer to “Mr. Matta,” “The Pharaoh,” or the “Nostradamus of Norwood.”
* He receives $100 each time he refers to himself in the third person during interviews (now known as “the third person clause”)
* The Kahn’s Krazies will have to transport him like Pharaoh’s slaves in “The 10 Commandants” on and off the court
* Mr. Matta will sit on the Blue Blob the entire game.
* The Blue Blob will gently massage Mr. Matta’s buttocks throughout said game.
* At least one Dance Team member must feed Mr. Matta grapes throughout said game and procure him 40’s of “Old E” (or other adult malt beverages) upon his demand.
* Mr. Matta receives 23.4% of all future parking fines and Chief Couch will personally drive him around campus on Mr. Matta’s own gold cart with a Roll Royce grill.
* All future contract negotiations will take place on E-Bay
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- Season Tickets. -- BP, 12:43:23 07/25/02 Thu
I'm part of a group of season ticket holders, and I haven't actually seen the invoice for the tickets this year, but I thought I saw somewhere that the home ticket package already included a potential 2nd NIT game. What is the story behind that?
I can understand the desire to avoid having to print and sell tickets in an organized fashion if we are awarded the second game, but everything I've seen indicates this is a pretty long shot.
If we all pay for tickets now, will refund checks be processed as soon as we know we don't get the home game? I thought I saw somewhere that they were contemplating applying it as a deposit to the 03-04 season. That would make for a nice no interest loan the 8000+ season ticket holders are making to the university for a year, on top of the 'donations' the good seat holders are required to cough up on a regular basis.
I hope we get a second game and it becomes a non issue, and it does make sense to plan for success, but what happens to my cash if we don't get that game?
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- The Big Red Menace -- The Real Roscoe, 19:28:51 08/08/02 Thu
Did anyone catch PTI last Friday and hear Kornheiser's sub say that the networks should be sued for shows "like Suddenly Susan and Punky Brewster"? Kathy Griffin and Margaret Cho wear flannel in August.
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- Were you there? Did you hear? -- XU Fan, 15:52:14 07/15/02 Mon
The news everyone was waiting to hear. Guess who is staying at X? Everyone that thought West would leave raise their hand and go to the back of the classroom. Everyone else thanks Colemand and Chalmers every time you see tham because Daid said it was those two guys that convinced him into staying so they could do something special next year. He was very emotional and said that he was going to leave until he talked to AC and LC. Everyone can breath now. Let's start the season.
The award handed out tomight were as follows:
Connie Brown (most inspirational player) Frey
Ernest Staak Memorial (unselfish Dedication) A Coleman
Gordon Nead (Most improved player) Sato
Best Defensive Player The Team
Team Assist Leader Chalmers
Lew Hirt Society Coach’s award James Barnoas A Brown
Musketeer award Frey
Best Free Throw Shooter West
Best Rebounder West
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- THE TRUTH ON DONALD LITTLE'S DEFENSE -- THE TRUTH, 21:58:00 07/28/02 Sun
Word on the street is that Donald Little is going with the rarely used “cellular vs. digital” defense in his upcoming trial. Evidently this argument has already been accepted by Bob Huggins, Bob Goin and the Cincinnati media, which is why he is preparing to play for the Bearcats this fall with little resistance or outrage from anyone.
In documents obtained by the cartel, Donald is claiming that the incident on April 1 with his roommate Justin Hodge is big misunderstanding because of cellular static. Little claims that he received a cell phone call from Hodge in which he heard “Hey Donald, Why don’t you come home and tape me to a chair, and then beat me in the face with weights and bottles. When you are done doing tha,t burn me with cigarettes and stab me a couple times.”
When according to Hodge what he really said was “Donald, thanks for cleaning the apartment and doing my laundry. You are the best roommate ever.” Hodge then chuckled through his wired shut, broken jaw, recalling the wacky misunderstanding.
Little also blames the “take Hodge to Columbus, kill him, and dump his body there” comment on poor cellular reception. What I really said was “Justin, you had me at hello…. I love you for the man you are and the man you want to be.”
“Can you hear me now?”
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- More of the Donald Little File -- Peter Parker, 11:38:57 07/24/02 Wed
First off, props to TBHPM for his latest post on Justin Hodge - maybe you should just give up your own daytime job and become the investigative reporter that this city badly needs.
But, that said, let's take a closer look at the Donald Little file in the past two years:
Cincinnati Enquirer - May 5, 2001
On May 3, 2001, Donald Little, B.J. Grove, and a few other UC basketball players were allegedly involved in a barfight. Little was charged with misdemeanor assault, and Grove was going to be charged with felony assault. To this date, we have never heard the fate of B.J. Grove in this matter - leads me to believe that charges were never filed. So therefore, it never happened, right?
Cincinnati Enquirer - May 20, 2001
On May 19, 2001, Little was arrested in Boone County for speeding in a work zone (which results in a doubled fine in most states), operating a motor vehicle under the influence of alcohol, driving under a suspended license, and possession of marijuana. Little was booted from the basketball team, apparently having run out of "2nd chances."
Quote from Bob Goin: The release says it all; that's all I'm going to say about it. He's done.
Cincinnati Enquirer - May 22, 2001
On May 21, 2001, a misdemeanor assault arrest warrant was issued for Donald Little. In an affidavit, Jennifer Hemmelgarn (an employee of In The Woods in Clifton) confronted Little for not wearing a wristband while drinking beer, per ITW's policy. Little did produce an ID, but apparently he wasn't satisfied. He promptly kicked her in the ribs and tried to drag her on the floor as she tried to flee to safety. As for his teammates in the bar at the time, the matter was never addressed.
Cincinnati Enquirer - May 23, 2001
The following day, Little was arraigned in Hamilton County Courthouse on the misdemeanor assault charge and was released without bond.
Cincinnati Enquirer - July 25, 2001
On July 24, 2001, we hear the first signs that Donald Little may be on his way back to the Bearcats. In regards to his arrest in Boone County, Little pled guilty to reckless driving, having an open container of alcohol, and not having his driver's license in his possession when he was pulled over. The original DUI charge was knocked down to reckless driving, the original charge of driving under a suspended license was knocked down to hot having a license in his possession, and the charge of speeding in a work zone was dropped altogether. I'm sure any and all of Kentucky's road construction workers will be happy to hear that - beware his vehicle if he's ever driving in your work zone at night the next time.
And why, might you ask, was Little's license suspended to begin with? On September 29, 2000, Little was pulled over for driving without a license plate and for driving with a suspended license for reasons the Enquirer would not disclose. If you go to Musketeer Madness, a laundry list of charges against Little appear for Hamilton County alone - which doesn't take into account Northern Kentucky or even his home state of Georgia.
Cincinnati Post - August 16, 2001
But, back to the assault trial. In a move that was well orchestrated and swept under the Cincinnati media's rug, Judge John Burlew was eventually assigned to the Little case. (No conflict of interest, right?) Knowing this, Little and his attorneys waived their right to a jury trial. Fortunately, TBHPM was on vigilant guard that summer. Check out the following post:
John Burlew And My Alcohol Problem
Brilliantly enough, the post was distributed to every member of the courtroom on August 15, 2001. In disgust, Burlew recused himself from the case, stating officially that he knew a defense witness. Of course, we'll overlook that he was the attorney for several UC players defended in the past. He also expressed disgust at all the "Bearcat haters and Donald Little haters" in the courtroom. TBHPM, let us know if Ted Froncek ever becomes a judge in the Hamilton County Common Pleas Court.
Cincinnati Enquirer - September 6, 2001
Finally, on September 5, 2001, Little pled guilty to a 4th-degree misdemeanor charge of disorderly conduct in the ITW case. The original misdemeanor assault charge was knocked down, and Little was sentenced to three months probation, a $120 fine, and was ordered to attend anger management classes. And don't forget this final prophecy:
Quote from the Enquirer: Mr. Goin had not ruled out the possibility of Mr. Little returning if he cleared up his legal problems.
Obviously, B.J. Grove and other UC teammates were never charged in their roles in the case - this case was now closed.
Cincinnati Enquirer - September 22, 2001
Well, guess who got another 2nd chance. On September 21, 2001, Little was reinstated to the basketball team. Here were the provisions for Little to follow:
- Attend anger management counseling (as ordered by the courts)
- Meet weekly with a counselor from the Dean of Students' office
- Stay out of establishments that serve alcohol
- Be on behavior probation by the athletic department
And here are some memorable quotes in the Enquirer from Huggins in the matter:
On Little's behavior: Caused embarrassment for our program
After the courts took action: Our penalty no longer fits the crime.
His final thoughts: I think we did what we should've done at the time. In retrospect, it's been a wonderful thing for him. Donald paid a price. I think it's really forced him to grow up and appreciate the opportunity that he has.
But wait, there's more. No suspension was announced for Little that day, yet B.J. Grove was suspended by then-Conference USA commissioner Mike Slive for 1 game for elbowing a UAB player in the head during the 2001 C-USA Tournament.
Cincinnati Enquirer - April 3, 2002
Seeing as how it was April 1, 2 things came to mind when the day began. #1, it was Opening Day in Cincinnati - a time in which the city all but shuts down with an opening-day parade in Findlay Market and the subsequent opener in Riverfront Stadium against the Chicago Cubs. By night, the NCAA Championship would take place between Indiana and Maryland.
But someone forgot to tell Donald Little about these two events on this day - apparently he had more constructive things to do on this day. The Justin Hodge episode, in which Hodge was hit in the face with a weight bar, burned with incense, and stabbed in the leg. His jaw had to be wired shut as a result. Hodge then told police that Little ordered friends in the apartment to take Hodge to Columbus, kill him, and dump his body there. Little was promptly charged with felonious assault and kidnapping. I can't wait to see how Little tries to plead this down.
Cincinnati Enquirer - April 4, 2002
A day after Little was suspended from all off-season activities (more on that later), Little was again dismissed from the UC basketball program by Huggins. This time, apparently, UC officials (as reported) are not going to allow Little to appeal the decision, seeing as how he violated his behavioral probation.
Cincinnati Enquirer - April 7, 2002
This was a column written by Tim Sullivan, who since has moved to San Diego. Sullivan was the only reporter who openly questioned the $2,500 that Little had in the apartment. This was probably the reason he went after Hodge, but why would $2,500 be in his possession? Even Sullivan hinted that NCAA investigators may want to take a look at this, if they aren't doing so already.
Cincinnati Enquirer - April 12, 2002
And here is Tom Hathaway, UC's SID, explaining the $2,500:
UC athletic department assistant athletic director for media relations Tom Hathaway says $700 was Little's monthly room-and-board subsidy and the rest was student financial aid.
Now, correct me if I'm wrong, but why would the $1,800 set aside for financial aid be in Little's possession and not in the hands of UC's office of financial aid? Bells and whistles should be going off here, but not in Cincinnati.
Cincinnati Enquirer - May 8, 2002
So Little is permanently kicked off the team, right? Ummm, not exactly. Little was allowed to show up for the post-season banquet ceremony, because in Huggins's words, He's supposed to be here. This was about last year's team. Now, correct me if I'm wrong, but is there some sort of loophole that allows him to go from suspended from all off-season activities (which included the banquet) to expulsion from the basketball program and yet still show up? The spin is beginning already.
And here we sit today - 5 continuances later, the trial is allegedly set to begin August 21, 2002. Notice the pattern from last year - chips are falling in place for Little to play again for UC in the fall. Huggins needs a center, and Little has a year of eligibility remaining. How odd.
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"Gary's Brother" (NT) -- THE TRUTH, 16:34:44 09/12/02 Thu
(NT) -- BP, 18:13:27 08/19/02 Mon