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Date Posted: 09:15:07 08/19/01 Sun
Author: C as in "CEEEEEEEEEEE we need an idea"!
Subject: The First JAG Broadway Musical starring......BUD!!! Give him a hand folks! (And some words, actions, oh, and a plot wouldn't hurt)


We had such fun incorporating songs and music into our last story, that I thought we could do Bud: The Broadway Musical. Regular dialogue is allowed, but we also need those great song & dance numbers—ensembles, solos, heartbroken duets, etc. If you don’t want to write a song, just suggest a title and everyone (maybe) will jump in!

See, this is TOTALLY Uncomplicated!

Bud was walking down the street toward the JAG office with a smile on his face. It was going to be a great day. He decides to climb the stairs because he is in such a great mood. Two flights up he reconsiders and gets on the elevator.

The JAG bullpen is busy with its usual morning activity
, but as the elevator doors slide open and Bud steps off, everyone immediately switches gears and begins the opening number…

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Replies:

[> Sigh.... I'm SO glad this won't be DIFFICULT! Ahem... O.K.. I'll try.... Singer and Mattoni burst into "It's a Hard Knock Life" from Annie except the words are a little different "It's the hard-knock life for us! It's the hard-knock life for us! 'Stead-a courtroom- we get soap, "stead-a cases we get doped, It's the hard-knock life. Just then the Admiral walks, no dances, in.... -- Luoodles, 15:19:22 08/19/01 Sun


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[> [> WHOOPS, sorry, C. didn't read the last of your post carefully enough. Change that to they ALL burst into "It's a Hard Knock Life" from Annie except the words are a little different "It's the hard-knock life for us! It's the hard-knock life for us! 'Stead-a courtroom- we get soap, "stead-a cases we get doped, It's the hard-knock life. Just then the Admiral walks, no dances, in.... -- Lu be back tomorrow., 15:20:41 08/19/01 Sun


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[> [> [> AJ stops dancing and turns to them all to give a pep talk: (Music from West Side Story-Jet song.) "Hey gang, listen up. (Sings and swaggers) When you're a JAG you're a JAG all the way, / From your first case in court / Till they fly you away. / When you're a JAG let the Secnavy whine, / Together we'll stand, Bud, Harm, Mac, Gun and Tine." -- Cece lost in Bud space, 16:45:27 08/19/01 Sun


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[> [> [> [> rotflm6o. Oh sure i can so see the admiral singing that. LOLOLOLOL -- Suze, 19:26:43 09/02/01 Sun


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[> Jingo shuffles in singing (to the tune of The Wizard of Oz "If I Only Had A Brain") My nose just made a whistle, it's shaped just like a misile, it shoots me in the daaaaaark! Deet de de de de deet! I'd be snortin' and sniffin' and a woofin and a whiffin' if you'd take me to the paaaaaaaaark! -- Luoodles and the Mister who is beginning to question my sanity, 19:08:19 08/19/01 Sun


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[> In the background four officers come out holding leashes while four others carry painted cardboard bushes as scenary. Mic twirls up to sing. Here's your leash and collar, if I only had a dollar, for the times I let you pee.(sorry, it had to rhyme--I did have times I walked you 'round). Deet de de de de deet! I'd have money for a hit man and some extra cash for surfin', then Mac wouldn't marry meeeeee! The officers ditch the shubbery and bring out surfboards while Mic backs off for Mac to take the spotlight. -- C (He's only just *beginning* to to question it?) Love the W of O song....I think we can get another few verses out of it!, 20:04:53 08/19/01 Sun


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[> [> Mac walks up wearing a wet, teal-coloured towel: "I whiled a way the hour, standing in the shower, Deet de de de de deet, "But I'm in some confusion, I am only Harm's illusion, He's a dufus you see." Mac drops towel, and runs off followed by officers with surf boards. Harm wonders in looking stunned. -- Cece, 20:44:20 08/19/01 Sun


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[> [> [> Eek. Sorry I didn't rhyme the last line. Cut "He's a dufus.." and add "But I really have the power." -- cece wondering about the whole Lu household! (I am allowed to post here?), 20:54:03 08/19/01 Sun


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[> [> [> [> Are you "allowed" to post here? You're kidding. We practically KIDNAP people to get them here! LOL! Is Cecelia allowed to post here, Katherine??? Hmmm... She's not here, so I guess I can answer. Let me thi YES! (Dimbulb) What a question! -- Luoodles Wondering about CECELIA's household! LOL BTW, I LIKED the "he's a doofus" part!, 22:54:39 08/19/01 Sun


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[> [> [> [> [> Songs? Rhyming lines? I can't help with this! Heather wrote that Grease Jag thing last year. She would be good at this. Kidnap Heather to help with this. -- PB, 23:49:02 08/19/01 Sun


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[> [> [> Harm wanders in, looking stunned and sings: "I took a hit upon my noggin, now my mind's a-foggin. It's been that way before. Deet de de de de deet! Just keep calling me a doofus, I'll catch a ride out on the JAGbus... *SCHWACK!* How'd I wind up on the floor?" -- Snark Hunter, now I can't get that song out of my head... you'll pay for that, my pretties!!!!, 23:23:39 08/19/01 Sun


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[> [> [> [> Okay, keep the doofus line in my verse above. The real song doesnt rhyme the last line anyway. Snark didn't leave a set up for me. Renee tap dances in. The officers take come carrying cases of cosmetics: "My boyfriend took a swack, Now he's confusing me with Mac, Deet de de de de deet! For the love of this sailor, I would live in a trailer, With my lip gloss on the rack." Renee taps off, officers remove the cosmetic kits. Tiner roller blades onto the scene. -- Cece, 03:16:32 08/20/01 Mon


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[> [> [> [> [> OH Horrors! I've been screwing up by leaving a line out of my verses before the deet dedes. and I have not time to fix it yet. Sorry. -- cece (blushing in poetic shame), 09:50:51 08/20/01 Mon


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[> [> [> OK I'm making changes here so ignor my Eek. line change directly below. "I Whiled away the hour, Standing in the shower, Hoping Harm would join me, Deet de de de de deet. But I am in some confusion, I am only Harm's illusion, He's a doofus you see." -- cece, getting it right this time, 10:48:21 08/20/01 Mon


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[> [> [> [> Are you tired of me yet? This is my change to the Renee verse: "My boyfriend took a Swack, Now he's confusing me with Mac, She's a hottie you see. Deet de de de de deet. I'd hit her with a spatula, Just to keep off my batchelor, He is going to marry me." -- Cece going back to maeve's where I won't be noticed amongst all the other loonies!, 11:00:08 08/20/01 Mon


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[> [> [> [> [> There are loonies over there!?! Oh, now I'm scared! -- C, No, Mr. Fred, I'm not scared of you!, 21:40:05 08/20/01 Mon


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[> Okay! Time for some plot (and maybe Bud will ACTUALLY get to SAY something!)! Heh hem. Bud has frozen in front of the elevator watching this scene unfold with wide eyes. He shakes his head as if to clear the visions out of his brain, but it doesn't seem to be working. He steps forward and immediately there is a sword arch whatever ya call it for him to walk under. He gives the officers a quizzical look, not because they are holding an arch for him, but because all of a sudden they have pool noodles in their hands--florescent ones. The prop manager had forgotten to replace the surfing and water props with proper swords. Bud shakes his head again very hard, steps out from beneath the last sword and -- C we need a plot here---and someone had better explain EXACTLY what Jingo, Mac, and Renee are doing in the office!, 18:08:22 08/20/01 Mon


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[> [> Bud wonders out loud why everything is set up wrong, and who can he blame for the complete mess. He tap dances through the arch singing: ""I got out of bed this morning, Stretching and a yawning, Had a shower and a shave. Deet de de de de deet. Now I'm in an arch of noodles, I shall have to email Luooodles, And kick Cece back to Maeve. -- Cece...running, 20:36:42 08/20/01 Mon


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[> Everyone freezes, stares at Bud with the oddest looks he's ever gotten in his life--including times when he was ranting about aliens and UFOs while eating Powernuts. The Admiral barks, "Roberts, get your six in my office pronto. Do I need to summon pychiatric help? Who in the world are Luoodles and Maeve!?" Bud looks around and notices that everyone suddenly seems extremely busy getting props put away or fiddling with papers on their desk. "Sir..." Bud still looks confused, "What exactly is going on here? I came in and there was this arch? And why is Jingo here?" He hastily adds, "Sir." -- C, 20:45:42 08/20/01 Mon


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[> [> Bud makes a plea to the Admiral. Meanwhile, AJ holds a handkerchief to his nose, and everyone else rushes away. Mac rushes in still in a towel, calling "bad doggie." Mic is right behind looking ill. Carries a paper bag. Bud tries to explain his confusion to the Admiral. Sings :"I'm an efficient naval lawyer, A boon to my employer, But it's a zoo around here. Deet de de de de deet. There's the colonel in her towel, And her boyfriend with a trowel, Jingo's pooped right there I fear." -- Cece: come on Bud's people. I'm an angel....I can't do all the work here. LOL, 21:40:42 08/20/01 Mon


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[> [> [> AJ removed his hankerchief, fixed Bud with his patented 'Glare-O-Death' and sang, "That dog is a disgra-ace. Remove him from this pla-ace. And when you're done with that... Deet de de de de deet! Then make sure the bullpen's spotless, or my staff will be just one less! This wouldn't happen with a cat!!" Bud blanched and turned to the bullpen when... -- Ms. Purrl Bailey, why do they keep putting dogs on TV?!?, 23:10:38 08/20/01 Mon


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[> [> [> [> LOL Ms Bailey (cat's haven't sold out to humans that's why...we are way too smart.) Bud orders Tiner to clean the place out, Jingo is fired from the set, and Harriet comes in dressed as a Cat (an old Cats costume). Harriet sings: "Harm is just a silly person, He never learns his lesson, He should take a tip from me. Deet de de de de deet. If you want to keep your lady an/ d Frighten off the Australian/ Just mark your territ'ry. Meow" Harriet skips out in cat costume and comes back in as Harriet. She faces Bud and.... -- Cece, 23:39:53 08/20/01 Mon


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[> [> Re: Everyone freezes, stares at Bud with the oddest looks he's ever gotten -- , 23:14:58 05/18/02 Sat

A. I can’t come by tonight, I’m sorry. I’ll see you this weekend. Bye-bye. (hangs up, hits another speed dial) Hi. It’s me. What’re you wearing? (listening) You naughty naughty girl. What am I going to do with you?


I wonder if the boys can remove the rose-colored glasses when it comes to this woman.


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[> (C starts to pray) says to him in that "you forgot an historical date in our marriage" voice, "Bud, this was all for you, to celebrate -- C, 21:46:25 08/21/01 Tue


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[> [> You mean this is the end C.? Where are all Bud's people? Don't blame if this musical closes after the first night to dreadful reviews, LOL! *I* did my best. -- Cece realizing she is no Andrew Lloyd Webber, 14:32:13 08/22/01 Wed


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[> [> [> LOL! No, no! "All" as in, "we did this all for you!" -- C why are there remarks on the other board alluding to our sanity? We haven't even gotten started yet!, 16:57:02 08/22/01 Wed


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[> [> [> I think I misunderstood. You didn't mistake Bud's line for finality did you? Oh, never mind, anyway! No, I didn't mean that this was the end or that I was quitting! -- C, 21:37:48 08/22/01 Wed


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[> [> [> [> Bud blushes and says "aw shucks". Harriet kisses him and the officers return playing violins (same tune only slowly to welling strings). Harriet sings as she looks into Bud's eyes: "You are a lovely hubby, your cheeks are cute and chubby, and you have a sexy grin, Deet de de de de deet. I have some intimations, Of cunnubial relations, While the admiral's not in." Bud kicks the officers out and locks the door. Just as he and Harriet begin to take their jackets off, the phone rings on AJs line and Gunny pokes his head through the window....... -- cece, 22:45:17 08/22/01 Wed


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[> [> [> [> there is the sound of shattering glass. "Jarheads!", exclaims an exasperated Bud. He turns back to Harriet who is picking up the phone. "Admiral Cheggwidden's office, Lt. Sims speaking," she said briskly, while leering at her husband. Bud's eyes widened and then... -- Snark Hunter, I'm tired of this so-ong. It's gone on way to lo-ong. We have to make it stop. Deet de de de de deet! This tune keeps sticking in my he-ead. I'm sure we'll find another inste-ead. So please, can it be dropped?, 23:16:58 08/22/01 Wed


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[> [> [> [> [> Sure it's driving me nuts too. I was just following instructions. -- Cece, 01:10:58 08/23/01 Thu


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[> Got bigger as Harriet started unbuttoning her jacket. She handed the phone to Bud who gulped and said in a strangled voice, "hello Sir." His attention turned immediately and completely to the phone with the Admiral's next words... -- C, 06:27:32 08/23/01 Thu


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[> [> The Admiral sings to the JAG theme: "Bud put me o-on the speaker, So-o that all can hear what I say (du du du dun) I have some good ne-ews for you, Mic and Renee are going, hey! It is now or never, They must take a hike, The shippers can't stand them, We know what they like. We have to give Bud and Har-ri-et more focus, And Harm and Mac more hocus pocus...... -- Cece (I *think* that works) Let's see if anyone else can do the last little part of the theme music. ..... The Admiral, after reaching a crescendo, continues with the theme in a tremendous flourish. The whole cast is now listening to these important words...., 12:45:41 08/24/01 Fri


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[> [> [> ACK!!! We had a half day today and did Flash Card Friday when they made flash cards. We listened to Tarzan and Star Wars and I can't even THINK of the JAG theme right now--all I've got is dah dah, da da da, dahhhhh da, da da da dahhhh da, dee dum dee deeeee -- C who will rewind a tape that has the intro and return in a bit!, 19:05:21 08/24/01 Fri


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[> The Admiral sings, :dah dah, da da da, dahhhhh da, da da da dahhhh da, dee dum dee deeeee." Everyone in the outer office looks at him in great puzzlement, Harm is the first to recover and speak, "Been watching Phantom Menace again Sir?" The Admiral hangs his head, "yes, I can't help it. I go to my support group, but it doesn't work! I was up all night last night and watched it four times!" Jingo whimpered and walked over to lay his head on the Admiral's shoes. "Jingo understand sir, he remembers when I couldn't stop watching Runaway Bride last spring," said Mac. She glared at Brumby, "I WONDER if my subconcous was speaking." Renee looked daggers at Mac and Singer stepped out of the way to avoid any possibility of contamination. -- C okay, Cece, you're doing a great job. I am just going to add the disclaimer that I didn't mean for the whole thing to be sung., It's okay if we want to, but I don't want to place undo stress on anyone., 07:44:12 08/25/01 Sat


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[> [> Oh SURE C. NOW you tell me....LOLOL! I've been going nuts here trying to think of tunes and rhymes. You know it don't come easy writing doggerel for the deluded! I keep on losing the BLA addy, but I will return later. -- Cece, 15:58:17 08/27/01 Mon


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[> [> [> As I said, you were doing great Cece, but I was afraid people weren't participating because they couldn't think of more lyrics for the wizard of OZ!!!! -- C, 20:57:34 08/27/01 Mon


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[> [> [> [> I wrecked your musical C. I could keep on writing daft verse indefinitely. My advice is to start again all fresh, and then others will join in. (And I promise not to rhyme.) And I will never be able to listen to "If I only had a brain" song again without the deet de de de deet (and that was Lu's fault!) -- Cece, 17:46:40 08/28/01 Tue


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[> [> [> [> [> No, no! You haven't ruined it! You were the only one that kept going with me! i think it's wonderful, we'll just keep treking on.... -- C, 19:04:47 08/28/01 Tue


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[> In the office Bud takes the phone away from his ear and looks at it in puzzlement. Harriet gives up on undressing, rebuttons her uniform blouse, and leaves the office in a huff. As she walked through the crowd comforting the Admiral in his breakdown, she muttered about doofora, spoons, aliens, and computer jerks, errr, geeks. She knocked into a straggling prop officer and a surfboard fell to the ground. Bud, in the office, has finally put the phone back to his ear. "Uhhh, sir?" On the other end he heard, "click." He had been hung up on. He looks around for his wife and sees her nowhere in sight. -- C, 19:09:44 08/28/01 Tue


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[> [> Bud's gaze swept around the office, he was all alone... Then he heard it. Mystifyingly faint, but nevertheless compelling - where was it coming from? He began a slow circuit of the office, listening intently. There... he was getting closer. What could it be? He had to know! Closer... closer... it was getting louder, clearer. Could it be the Admiral's computer? Cautiously, Bud slipped around to the front of the screen, hardly daring to breathe. The program Tiner had installed to search for alien communications was up and running. And there were words... "The Nav-vy is the place to be! Sea-faring is the life for me! Watch that ocean stretching far and wide. Keep your civvies, I'm out with the mornin' tide!" Suddenly, the office door slammed open and there stood Harm, spatula-marked and defiant... -- Snark Hunter, sorry I missed so much - RL sucks sometimes., 22:44:23 08/29/01 Wed


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[> "Lt Roberts!" Bud looked up startled. He quickly clicked the "hide screen" icon in the bottom left toolbard. "Uh, yes sir?" he stannered. "You need to get your wife under control!" Harm thundered. "I don't know what you said to her, but when I asked her if you were still in the office, she whacked me wtih THIS!" Harm help up the offending spatula. "She's upset about something and I suggest you go and take care of it!" "Um...sir...I would love to, but...." "But WHAT Lt! She hit me with a kitchen utensil!" "Okay, sir, just one moment." "Not, 'just one moment.' NOW!" Bud reluctantly tore his gaze from the blank computer screen. All he could see was the Admiral's normal background. Who knew the Admiral had a thing for The Muppets? Bud walked around the desk slowly toward the door. He wanted to find out more about the alien search program. He would just have to hope the Admiral didn't know about the "hide screen" icon and that it would stay hidden until he could return. -- C, 06:27:27 08/31/01 Fri


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[> [> Bud stepped out into the bullpen and looked around. The group consoling the Admiral had joined hands and were now singing "Kumbaya". He shuddered and headed for the kitchen in search of Harriet. She was standing by the coffeemaker with her back to him. "Harriet?..." Bud queried, cautiously. "Oui, mon cher," she replied, "You were looking for moi?" The hairs on the back of Bud's neck rose. Why did her voice sound funny? Why was she using French words? Why... The air whooshed out of Bud's lungs as he found himself wrapped in Harriet's embrace and his blood ran cold when he heard her sigh, "Oh, Kermie!" -- Snark Hunter, ooo - plot twist... I loved the Muppet Show!!!, 00:22:18 09/01/01 Sat


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[> [> [> Just then Bud was better and started singing his rendition of "The rainbow conection"...... -- Cinders, 13:07:35 09/03/01 Mon


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[> [> [> [> Why are there so many songs about Harmon and not so many 'bout me?/ Harmon's good looking, but he's clueless. I'm cute too can't ya see!/ Some say Harm's the best and choose to believe it. I know they're wrong wait and see./ Someday ill be discovered. "That Stud named Bud." The guys will all envy meeee!" -- Suze (real lyrics to rainbow connection inside thanks to letsingit.com), 14:29:11 09/03/01 Mon

Why are there so many songs about rainbows and what's on the other side?
Rainbows are visions, but only illusions, and rainbows have nothing to hide.
So we've been told and some chose to believe it. I know they're wrong wait and see.
Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection. The lovers, the dreamers and me.

Who said that every wish would be heard and answered when wished on the morning star?
Somebody thought of that. And someone believed it. Look what it's done so far.
What's so amazing that keeps us star gazing and what do we think we might see?
Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection. The lovers, the dreamers and me.

All of us under its spell. We know that it's probably magic.
Have you been half asleep and have you heard voices? I've heard them calling my name.
Is it the sweet sound that calls the young sailor. The voice might be one and the same.
I've heard it too many times to ignore it. It's something that I'm supposed to be.
Someday well find it, the rainbow connection. The lovers, the dreamers and me.


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[> It was Harm's turn to shudder, as he walked into the kitchen to find Bud singing to his reflection in the coffee pot. He needed coffee desparately, or he would have walked out. Harm reached over Bud's shoulder and snagged the pot. He quickly poured a cup of the less than warm brew and gulped it down with a grimace. "What is with people today?" he muttered as he left. Bud, humming to himself, hardly noticed Harm's entry and departure and turned back towards Harriet. He had been imagining her affection towards him, and now he tried to reach out to repair the rift that had begun in the fabric of their marriage. -- C (it seemed like the moment for metaphors), 16:59:54 09/03/01 Mon


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[> But, unfortunately, Harriet was still very ticked off that her earlier seduction had not succeeded. She picked up her coffee cup and walked out the kitchen door in a huff. Bud sighed, hummed a few more bars of The Rainbow Connection, and left the kitchen himself. He needed to go back to the Admiral's office to check out the status of the aliens. As he walked along the outisde edge of the bullpen he noticed the group around the Admiral had been reduced to only him and Tiner. Tiner was consoling the Admiral with some ancient Zen philosophies. The Admiral looked ready to.... -- C who is wondering if she scared everyone off......., 22:05:59 09/05/01 Wed


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[> [> become a monk with all the weird philosyphies. The look on his face was undescribable. Just as Bud thought the admiral was going to do one of those bows with his hands in "prayer" form, bending only at the waist, the admiral gave Bud a high kick. Bud.... -- Cinders, 17:37:35 09/06/01 Thu


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[> screamed in pain and yelled for his spoon. The Admiral's glazed eyes cleared and he quickly apologized, "Lt. I am sorry. Tiner here," he pauses for an evil Admiral glare towards Tiner, "was just telling me about Zen philosophy." Tiner hadn't even noticed the exhange and subsequent glare and was rambling on about -- C yeah for Cinders for adding to the story!, 18:35:25 09/06/01 Thu


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[> [> the dietary concerns of the Zen yak which lives in the highest mountains of Zen country. -- C is tired of this last post and decided to just write the story HER way!, 18:30:02 09/18/01 Tue


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[> Bud and the Admiral quickly parted ways and Bud hurried through the bullpen, ducking around an occassional officer still dressed in surfer garb. He rushed into the Admiral's office and locked the door. Scurrying over to the computer he was just about to unhide the screen when a voice behind him spoke. -- C, 18:32:16 09/18/01 Tue


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[> [> "Good, good, good, good vibrations!" -- C, 20:21:21 09/20/01 Thu


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[> [> Bud whirled around to see who was speaking. He had been sure the office was empty--had even locked the door behind him. -- C, 20:53:25 09/20/01 Thu


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[> [> The little man on the window sill said in puzzlement, "what do you need that program for? You've got Singer." Bud rubbed his eyes to try and clear the vision from his brain. Opening one eye he looked toward the sun filled window, sighed in relief, and then opened both eyes. -- C, 20:43:57 10/03/01 Wed


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