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Date Posted: 00:33:22 09/11/06 Mon
Author: Tom Donoho
Author Host/IP: 4.158.108.223
Subject: Re: Need Prayer
In reply to: Rev. Mark McManus 's message, "Re: Need Prayer" on 15:50:33 09/09/06 Sat

I did not think Sandra did anything wrong in wanting to help. I merely mentioned what I did for two basic reasons:

1. When coming to the aid of one of the opposite sex it is not uncommon for that aid to contribute to projection, transference or counter-transference issues...or just plain misplaced affection/attraction arising from the helper-helped relationship. Of course, this is not found in pastoral counseling alone but, thankfully, sensitivity to it seems to be emphasised more in faith-based programs than it is in secular treatment settings...no doubt because ministers are held to a higher standard.

2. As an experienced paralegal, I wanted the sister to be forewarned of possible "accusations" arising from the situation. Unfortunately, clergy seem to receive undue attention in this area and need to be very careful.

I don't think it is necessary that men counsel only men and women counsel only women, that restricts what might be uniquely offered from the perspective of the genders. But it is necessary when a male pastor counsels a woman another church member be present...and vice versa where the pastor is a woman...it's accepted practice.

Peace...

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