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Date Posted: 26/08/06 4:42pm
Author: Meat Free Chicken Casserole
Subject: Re: KZ-4X
In reply to:
Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq.
's message,
"Re: KZ-4X" on
26/08/06 5:21am
Consider me as having applied.
Everytime I hit the "store pickle" button its back off to the doctor, answering those stupid questions about "how did a pickle get in there?", and look pretty darn stupid.
After the first time, I thought, this time I'll stand back at a distance and push that button with a broom handle. But the KZ-4x has a very long reach, and before I could get my pants up again, the machine had "stored the pickle".
Well the next time, I stood back even further and used a toy dart gun to the button. At first nothing happened. I cautiously snuck closer, and closer still, until I was standing right beside the machine. Still nothing, and I thought it must be broken. Anyway, that was yesterday, this morning I came out, bent over to get my dinner out of the oven, and fast as lightning, before I knew it, the machine had "stored the pickle". It was like the machine had been waiting, and I whipped around quickly to see the fading image of a smug expression on its display.
So this is the last time I refill its petrol tank.
MFCC
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Re: KZ-4X -- Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq. (Sale on Last Will and Testaments),
26/08/06 7:38pm
MFCC,
Thank you for joining the Class Action against Bedbeger International, Professor Barnswallow et all.
I must caution you however that simply not putting petrol in the "KZ-4X" will not impede it’s operation. It seems the R&D department at Bedbeger International incorporated some technology in anticipation of this. Firstly once the unit is fueled and started it charges a bank of batteries capable of operating the unit for over three years. Should that system fail there is a double redundant backup which can either power the unit by solar power or simply body heat. Tests at an independent lab confirmed that even a creature such as a mouse could provide power for days.
I would suggest you immediately wrap the KZ-4X in aluminum foil to block all solar and IR rays. That is unless you have activated the "untangle stretch wrap" function, if you have done this the KZ-4X will snatch the roll of foil and smooth out any folds.
Unfortunately the fading image of a smug expression on its display is a clear indication the KZ-4X is fully charged and may have already activated "Survival Mode" in which case you may need to burn down your residence.
Sincerely,
Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq.
Shlockman, Sueman, Kneebreaker and Stall
Attorneys at Law
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