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Date Posted: 6/05/06 9:44pm
Author: Maurice Shekel
Subject: Tarot readers wanted; good pay
Futuresight Tarot urgently requires trainee male/female tarot readers. A keen sense of humour is a must and must be capable of making things up as you go along. Training will include coming out with garbage such as: "I see a lucky day in the offing, were you born on a Wednesday?" and.. "There`s someone in your life that you are very fond of? or were fond of? or were potentially fond of? Perhaps with auburn hair?
Futuresight is an equal opportunities Company although preference will be given to those whose great-great grandparents were born in England.
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Replies:[>
Re: Tarot readers wanted; good pay -- Heinrich,
7/05/06 10:48am
Dear Futuresight Tarot, as soon as I saw your advert I knew this is what my whole life has been leading up to. I am a trainee male/female with auburn hair and also born on a Wednesday. For as long as I care to recall I have been hearing "There`s someone in your life that you are very fond of? or were fond of? or were potentially fond of? like a annoying echo over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again. Until I am almost out of my mind, but not to worry I am all right if I take my medicine daily.
I hope you will not disapoint me as my Great-great grandparents were born in England. Frida and Fritz O'Gotborg surely you must know? My fingers are itchy, no not the cleaver. I'll just sit here now and watch the telly till 3 AM, I am sure you will send me the "secret" message during one of the adverts. Maurice Shekel,Maurice Shekel,Maurice Shekel,Maurice Shekel,Maurice Shekel, I know you know we are kindered spirits in the GRAY Place of lost souls .....................................................................................,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
Call Me,
Heinrich
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Re: Tarot readers wanted; good pay -- Maurice Shekel,
7/05/06 9:17pm
Dear Heinrich
Thank you for replying to our advetisement for a trainee tarot reader. Your credentials appear to be superb except for one thing. The ideal candidate will have an ingrowing toenail on his/hers right foot, (small toe). If you still fit the bill please send me a digital photo and I will re-consider your application. God Bless and Bye for now. Regards Mo.
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Re: Tarot readers wanted; good pay -- Heinrich, 8/05/06 1:23am
My Dear Maurice Shekel,
Oh my, how the stars have conspired to create this coincidence, I have just come from my podiatrist and he has the x-rays of my ingrown toenail's which have afflicted both feet for several years and by coincidence they are both on the small toe! Hope this helps in the process of selecting a suitable candidate for the position. I'll have the good doctor fax the x-ray immediatly.
Heinrich
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Re: Tarot readers wanted; good pay -- Maurice Shekel, 8/05/06 2:52pm
Dear Heinrich
Thank you for your reply.
It seems that you are definitely in the right place at the right time. We are looking for an area manager, the perfect candidate will have TWO ingrowing toenails, one on the left foot (small toe) and one on the right foot (small toe also).
I`m very pleased to inform you that the job is yours if you want it. Plea get you podiatrist to fax the x-rays over ASAP.
By return I will fax you back a copy of your employee terms and conditions. There will of course be a monthly fee for you to come and work for us. The fee will be negotiable to a degree but it will be between £35.00 to £3,550.00 per month.
I await your earliest response as people are queuing up for to work for us. God bless you and thank you for allowig us to consider you graciously. Sincerely Mo S.
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