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Re: Grand Opening cancellation -- Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq., 30/04/06 4:50pm
Dear Tim,
We at Shlockman, Sueman, Kneebreaker and Stall strive to accommodate our clients. Perhaps you have a home in the country or a London flat you could use as collateral. Many of our clients seem to always find that sack of bank notes they stashed away for a quick trip to Buenos Aries. As I said previously, I am sure you will find our references impeccable and our methods above detection. My associates would like to remind you how easily accidents happen and the need for a legal representative at any moment. I urge you not to wait until you’re in custody to choose counsel.
At any moment a careless employee could drop a match, leave a high wattage light bulb in some packing material or just spill a flammable liquid near a source of ignition. Insurance company investigators often just do not understand these "accidents" until convinced by my associates. My staff has a proven record of explaining how "accidents" happen in terms insurance investigators can understand. Just last week Anthony Kneebreaker was telling my how he was relating a tale of how a toaster had fallen in the bath not long ago, resulting in the untimely demise of an insurance investigators entire family.The claim was of course settled the next day to the full satisfaction of our client.
Sincerely,
Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq.
Shlockman, Sueman, Kneebreaker and Stall
Attorneys at Law
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Re: Grand Opening cancellation -- Tim Davenport, 2/05/06 2:34pm
Dear Roger
I have a couple of homes in the country in actual fact but I have a problem in that I don`t have the deeds for any of the 4 of them. Based on this and on a gentleman`s "e-shake" would you agree to act for me?
I noticed that in your letter you mention the word "accident" I hope this is`nt a subtle ploy aimed at weakening my guard as I must warn you I came 3rd two years running in the egg and spoon race during my promary school years so please don`t underestimate me Sir.
I will also throw in a genuine signed autograph on the rear of a waterloo train ticket by Sven Goran Errikson. I`m sure it was him, we met after a Burnley game, he was there taking notes and being generally Swedish, acting the oaf etc etc.
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Re: Grand Opening cancellation -- Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq., 2/05/06 5:41pm
Dear Tim,
Not having deed to property is not a problem for Shlockman, Sueman, Kneebreaker and Stall, all we need is some collateral. Perhaps your mother-in-law or a stray child. Of course we would require the genuine signed autograph on the rear of a waterloo train ticket by Sven Goran Errikson also (Standard Ebay clause). Also as a show of good faith, I think you should include the spoon with which you won the egg and spoon race. We can not be too sure of your propensity to flee the country but by having the aforementioned articles in our safe keeping, my associates and myself might just rest a little easier. Knowing full well that should you default or turn any evidence over to the authorities, your precious Sven Goran Errikson autograph will be gone.
As soon as the arraignments are made I am sure the insurance company will make full payment, I trust the homes are insured also. As you know, the problem of country fire brigades arriving on time. Not to mention the termites that may infest them before Shlockman, Sueman, Kneebreaker and Stall "protects" them from damage.
Sincerely,
Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq.
Shlockman, Sueman, Kneebreaker and Stall
Attorneys at Law
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Re: Grand Opening cancellation -- Tim Davenport, 3/05/06 7:03pm
Dear Roger
Firstly please accept my sincere apology for the delay in my replying to you but I had to undergo a replacement hip-joint operation. The first operation was abandoned a few weeks ago due to my surgeon passing away half way through with a severe bout of e-coli so the replacement one was a bit of a godsend really. Anyways, I definitely want to proceed and would like to take up your very kind offer of using my mother in law as collateral. Mavis (the mother in law) is a bit obese but she has a heart of gold and cooks a mean pork chop. I would like to throw the wife in as well if it`s agreeable to you. The two of them are inseparable really so it would it be unkind on them (and particularly me) if they were parted from each other for more than a couple of hours.
I`m sure you will agree with me when I say sometimes one has to be cruel to be kind an analogy would be if I might be so bold as to like seperating a bloated sow from her little diddy pigfaced piglet!
Please let me know how best we can expedite things and when I should make arrangements to purchase a 2 litre bottle of
bargain priced strictnine.
Yours Sincerely and without prejudice
Mr T Davenport
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Re: Grand Opening cancellation -- Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq., 4/05/06 12:45am
My Dear Mr. Davenport,
Let me begin by saying how sorry I am your surgeon passed on, I do trust you had the new one dipped in antiseptic before the surgery. We seem to be in need of office cleaning staff, since our last charwoman was caught stealing some paper clips and elastic bands. My associate Mr. Kneebreaker had discovered the items missing from behind a file cabinet where he had kept them for years. She was immediately dispatched and has not been seen since.
But I digress, aside from cooking pork chops can this Mavis operate a Hoover, or perhaps your lovely wife. Once you enter into agreement with our terms there would be no need for a 2-litre bottle of strychnine, let me assure you should you even think of betraying our trusted confidence or trying to leave the country with the insurance money there would be no need for you to poison yourself.
Lastly I need your assurance that the premiums are fully paid, and should Mavis not work out would you mind terribly if she were found in the smoldering ruins by investigators? Per our standard fee of 75% I could sweeten the deal by say giving you 35% if Mavis and your lovely wife were deemed responsible. I could have the papers drawn up immediately showing their respective interest in the company and how they had devised a scheme to defraud the insurance and skip off to Buenos Aires.
Sincerely,
Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq.
Shlockman, Sueman, Kneebreaker and Stall
Attorneys at Law
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Re: Grand Opening cancellation -- Tim Davenport, 4/05/06 6:02pm
Dear Roger
Thank you for passing on your codolences regarding the sad demise of Dr Ahmed. The female replacement surgeon Tracey Smith, was to my AMAZEMENT very competent and only made the odd mistake when sawing through some gristle. She was a bit nervous and a more experienced and obviously far more intelligent male surgeon by the name of Dr Chopra took over the reins so to speak and completed the job in next to no time. I can now run a marathon, scale mount everest, and fell walk for fun - and all in just the two days!
Anyway back to business. I was very pleased to hear that you disposed of that charwoman. I have no time for women like her, she was obviously planning to rifle your safe or transfer a small fortune to a swiss bank account or something similar and had you not found her out by way of that strategically placed covert cctv camera she would probably have gotten away with it. I realise that company profits are paramount and SO WHAT if she has 8 hungry mouths to feed and a small delapidated slum-filled council house to upkeep she shoud have thought of that before she swiped
your stationary cabinet and it`s entire contents! Lockemup and throw the ruddy key away is my motto, we`ve been a namby-pamby society for far too long in my book and it`s time to get rid of the low-lifes, immigrants, and send them back home in a cardboard box!! Sorry, i`m getting a little carried away but i`m sure you`re exactly like me when it comes to the society of today, i`m pleased that you are.
My lovely wife is a dabhand with the Hoover, no one grips an hose like Cindy actually and if you have a nice stretchy one she will put it to good use I can tell you and shove it right up the nearest crevace. She loves to give it a real good poke and squeals with delight when said Hoover roars to a climax.
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Re: Grand Opening cancellation -- Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq., 4/05/06 8:17pm
Dear Tim,
Surprisingly the former charwoman was from Kent, and a very good family at that. We obtained her services in the usual manner when her husband was unable to pay the fees due for "services" rendered. They did have eight or nine squalling children, but rest assured they are well cared after and selling the Times in the underground in shifts. As part of our "standard agreement" with all employees, we at Shlockman, Sueman, Kneebreaker and Stall take care of the survivors and heirs. Of course we did have to collect the bank accounts and real property as in paragraph 6.4.19 of the employment agreement.
It was unfortunate after all we had done for Louise she would stoop to taking two slightly bent nickel plated paper clasps and a dried up elastic from Anthony’s office. But policy is policy and if we were to overlook even the slightest infraction where would we be?
By all means send over Mavis and your wife Cindy, if they work out I will personally see to it that your surgeon Tracey Smith is cured of her nervousness permanently or convince her to look for another line of work.
Sincerely,
Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq.
Shlockman, Sueman, Kneebreaker and Stall
Attorneys at Law
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Re: Grand Opening cancellation -- Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq., 5/05/06 7:11pm
Dear Mr. Davenport,
Does this mean our previous arraignments are to be canceled? We have already laid in supplies and wired the premises, I should warn you not to use the gent’s on the third floor.
I will be sending your Mum in law and Cindy back as soon a practical. Although Cindy has demonstrated an extraordinary talent, she seems to prefer lying in bed, eating bonbons, drinking vodka and watching daytime television. Meanwhile Mavis has exhausted the local butchers supply of pork chops and is looking hungrily at our camels. The grease buildup from the passed few days is getting to be a hazard around the gas cooker!
I trust you see our position, we did after all have a gentleman’s e-shake on this matter and my firm has spent countless hours in preparing for your "grand going out of business / fire sale" so we will be sending along an invoice with Mavis and Cindy on a Staple-It note attached to their foreheads. Terms net 30 days with the standard "pound of flesh" clause (per item 9877.340.2 of the contract) you may view this with an electron microscope in the lower right corner of the contract that appears to be an ink smudge.
Sincerely,
Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq.
Shlockman, Sueman, Kneebreaker and Stall
Attorneys at Law
PS- I’ll be sending some camels along also as they are getting to be quite annoying, not unlike Mavis and Cindy.
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Re: Grand Opening cancellation -- Tim Davenport, 5/05/06 8:40pm
Dear Roger
Please accept my sincere apology for the obvious oversight.
I meant to reply to you yesterday but my dutiful and very erotic sister-in-law cooked a bacon sandwich which gave me a hideous burping fit lasting for days if not weeks. My Doctor told me to simply drink some water but I don`t like to be seen to be cruel to harmless burps so I decided to just let it run its course.
You`re quite correct in that we did have a gentleman`s e-shake, and being as I am a man of honour and a christian to boot I still wish to proceed. Of course I can`t be responsible cost-wise for any outlay you would have made with regard to supplies and wiring. It`s not the money you understand but merely a matter of princible. Sorry if I sound a bit tight by the way (chuckles) in fact my wife often jokes that I have very deep pockets and extremely short arms when it comes to forking out for things. She also says mirthfully that I wear extremely baggy y-fronts and have an extremely puny.. but that`s as far as i`m going on that score. My motto is one has to be happy with what ones got, and, it`s the little things in life that count in the main - not completely though.
Thank you for your very kind gesture of offering to send back my ex-wife and ex mother-in-law. You`re really too kind
and I would have to insist that you dispose of them shall we say in a dark and desolate alleway somewhere, might I suggest downtown chicago? Finally, I think i`m right in saying that we have a non-verbal, but fully binding agreement that any profits that your good self and/or Shlockman, Sueman, Kneebreaker and Stall make directly or indirectly via either of our efforts will be shared 50-50 straight down the middle in my favour?
Please reply at your earliest convenience. Time is of the essence. Regards T Davenport.
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Re: Grand Opening cancellation -- Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq., 5/05/06 11:03pm
Dear Tim,
Of course I accept your apology, I must admit I have been a bit edgy these past few days myself. With the return of Meat Free Chicken Casserole, my anxious waiting for Vladimer, Zvonimir and Pankracije Ltd. to return to action, you can see how I am obviously stressed.
Did you know camels were carnivorous? Neither did I until Mavis walked among them with that cleaver (thought we had hidden all the sharp objects) I suppose it was the reek of thousands of pork chops or something but they devoured Mavis in mere moments. Cindy came by about then and in their shark like feeding frenzy she was gone in a flash. Well that takes care of that nasty business at least. I have had the camels placed in the cellar of your establishment, all that remains is to get your nephew Bernard ( who both Mavis and Cindy mentioned was a Lay About) into the establishment, ply him with several pints of ale and send him off to the third floor gents. That should give you enough time to remove to a safe location at least several blocks away.
As per our split I am sure if you look at paragraph 9872345.658912.3A of the contract with the aforementioned electron microscope you will see the split is 99.3% /.7%. I am sorry if this causes any inconvenience, but we do have expenses.
Sincerely,
Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq.
Shlockman, Sueman, Kneebreaker and Stall
Attorneys at Law
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Re: Grand Opening cancellation -- Tim Davenport, 6/05/06 3:38pm
Dear Roger
Thank you for being so understanding, I have been under a lot of stress also, my mother-in-law has really been getting on top of me lately and it`s been a heavy burden to bear I can say. I`m very pleased that Meat Free Chicken Casserole, Vladimer, Zvonimir and Pankracije Ltd. have returned to action, they have been sorely missed by us all.
I did`nt know that camels were carniverous actually,
I thought they fed mainly on cacti and dessert mushrooms which can be found in abundance in the Gobi, seldomly on hackney marshes.. Mavis had a habit of sleep walking with an axe which was one of the many reasons why I grew to loathe and distrust her over the years. I`m pleased that they both met their demise swiftly though, I think you will agree with me when I say that even the crudest of beasts should be treated humanely particularly when it comes to ousting them such a way. I take it you have had the vet in to check the camels over for distemper and rabies? Mavis and Cindy were`nt the most hygenic of bitches you would ever come across so my advice is have everyone who comes into contact with the heroic "offending" camels innoculated against all known diseases. My nephew Bernard held down 4 jobs to keep those two in clover so for them to call him a "layabout" is completely un-called for. I don`t suppose Mavis told you of the time when she seduced poor Bernard? I thought not, it was at a barbecue last summer. Bernard was just 34 and had burnt and over-heated his sausage. Mavis (the predatory nymph that she was) offered to slide it between her two bulbous "baps" to cool it down a little. Bernard, being a little naive, did`nt realise the sexual connotations, until that is Mavis demanded the dj play "Sexual Healing" by Marvin Gaye over and over again. Bernard became a man that evening..
Lastly, having closely scrutinised our contract with a stolen electron microspope I can see the clause that you mentioned. Frankly although the small-print was to say the least "microscopic" I concede that your share will be as you mentioned in your previous letter. (Y)7% (M)93.7%.
Kind regards
Tim Davenport Esq.
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Re: Grand Opening cancellation -- Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq., 7/05/06 11:04am
Dear Tim,
You are obviously dyslexic and not very good at simple arithmetic at that 7% + 93.7% = 100.7% Least wise why do you think you are getting even 93% I get 99.3% and you can have the leftover .7& plus your imaginary .7% so I guess you lucked out after all, got twice what I was originally offering. Lets do Business again soon.
Sincerely,
Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq.
Shlockman, Sueman, Kneebreaker and Stall
Attorneys at Law
PS- let me know when the ashes are cooled, seems I lost some car keys when I put the camels inside.
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Re: Grand Opening cancellation -- Snitch, Snatch, Grapple Solicitors, Commisioners for Oaths., 7/05/06 5:48pm
DearSirs
We act on behalf of Mr Timothy Davenport who we understand you have been corresponding with over the past few days. Our client has requested for us to take Court action against your practise and we hereby summons you to appear at Luton County Court on the date of 16/06/06. Please see below the charges that are to be brought against you:
(1) Falsifying a document or documents in order to gain money by deception.
(2) Two counts of murder; Count one: Our clients wife; Count two: Our clients mother-in-law. These offences took place yesterday at places unknown and at a time unknown.
(3) One count of character assassination; You accused our client of being incapable of simple arithmatic.
(4) Cruelty to animals; Feeding human flesh to various camels thus turning them into carnivours.
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Re: Grand Opening cancellation -- Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq., 7/05/06 9:37pm
Dear Snitch, Snatch & Grapple Solicitors, Commissioners for Oaths,
We at Shlockman, Sueman, Kneebreaker and Stall have a long history in defending our practices, especially in the Luton County Court. As Solicitor of Record for Mr. Timothy Davenport, we have weighed our options and already had him declared legally insane as of Wednesday last. Therefore I am sure you would agree even the fine Judges of the Luton County Court would not entertain your petition to represent Mr. Davenport. However being fair minded we would like to just make this all go away without ever stepping into a court of law. After all that’s our firms motto, "Settle Out Of Court" saving both our clients and ourselves much embarrassment.
I propose that we have Mr. Davenport transported to the sanitarium with haste, and split the proceeds.
Sincerely,
Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq.
Shlockman, Sueman, Kneebreaker and Stall
Attorneys at Law
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Re: Grand Opening cancellation -- Tim Davenport, 8/05/06 8:37pm
Dear Sir
I just thought I would let you know that as of today I will be representing myself. My former defence solicitor Art Grapple of Snitch, Snatch & Grapple Solicitors, Commissioners for Oaths informed me that he is unable to represent me because in his words I am "A pip short of an apple." Mr Grapple also told me that he is not the only one who thinks i`m a "fruitcake" and that probably the only person MAD enough to represent me is is in fact.."ME!"
Taking all the above into account, and my further rapid depths into madness I am ready to accept any reasonable offer you are willing to give. Finally I do hope that this does`nt sound like a veiled threat but I recently purchased a very large, stainless steel, self-sharpening, self-lubricating razor sharp meat cleaver (industrial version) and am still looking for a "Good Home" for it if you catch my demented drift.
Many thanks in anticpation for your earliest and extremely generous reply. I remain (worse luck) Mr Tim Davenport
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Re: Grand Opening cancellation -- Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq., 8/05/06 11:05pm
My Good Sir,
It's unfortunate that you were just not cut from the right cloth for being a captain of industry, sadly we here at Shlockman, Sueman, Kneebreaker and Stall Attorneys at Law see this all too often. I trust that when you get to Happy Pines and the seditive wears off you will get in touch with our former client.
Dr. Phineas K. Batsinbelfry
Happy Pines Sanatorium
Post Lobotomy Ward
Room 3
London
W12 OAE
Not unlike yourself Dr. Batsinbelfry was a promising young profesional until stricken with utter insanity. I am only glad we were able to provide for his keeping rather than have him wandering the streets. Mr. Kneebreaker will be by later to administer the seditive via dart gun and collect that nasty cleaver for safe keeping.
Per our current agreement we will make sure you have a long and confined stay at Happy Pines. In the meanwhile we will invest your money to assure your care until you death.
Sincerely,
Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq.
Shlockman, Sueman, Kneebreaker and Stall
Attorneys at Law
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Re: Grand Opening cancellation -- Dr Barry Ronaldson Head of Care Fulchester Unit, Preston, 9/05/06 5:06pm
Dear Sir
I am writing to you regarding a patient we recently took into care by the name of Timothy Davenport. As you are his next of kin I am obliged to inform you that we have him in our custody and I do hope this does`nt come as too much of a shock to you.
Tim was sectioned under the mental health act yesterday after exposing himself to a flock of pigeons in Trafalgar Square, Central London. The pigeons had to be put down as they went into severe shock after the atrocity. Luckily an off duty wpc Mandy Griffiths happened to be passing by who grappled Timothy to the ground and overpowered him with a quick knee in the cobblers and a sharp belt from her truncheon across his buttocks.
Timothy said that he would welcome a visit from you if you could summon the forgiveness and manage to somehow get to Fulchester within the next day or two.
Please let me know when you will be visiting and I will arrange for the hancuffs, leg-irons and muzzle to be removed.
Yours repsectfully
Dr Barry Ronaldson
Head of Care
Fuklchester Psychiatric Unit
Preston
PR2 4GH
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Re: Grand Opening cancellation -- Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq., 9/05/06 6:13pm
My Good Dr. Ronaldson,
I am relieved to hear Mr. Davenport is in good hands at a secure facility. My associate, Mr. Anthony Kneebreaker had gone to collect Tim last evening to transport him to Happy Pines Sanatorium, where arrangements had been made for his long term care. We were of course distressed at his absence and the fact that the extra large stainless steel, self sharpening and lubricating industrial cleaver Mr. Davenport had just purchased was missing as well.
It was indeed a stroke of luck that wpc Mandy Griffiths was at Trafalgar Square to apprehend him, for I can’t imagine what he may have done next. As it seems Mr. Davenport has truly "gone round the bend" our firm acting as his representatives felt it would be in our best interest to transport him to Happy Pines Sanatorium at the earliest possible. I will be sending Vladimer, Zvonimir and Pankracije , of Vladimer, Zvonimir and Pankracije Ltd. around today to collect him. As you may know Tim was once a successful businessman and we would like to keep this little incident quiet if you catch my drift. Vladimer, Zvonimir and Pankracije will be bringing a large steamer trunk filled with pound notes, which they will leave as payment for care given and your discretion in this matter. There should be sufficient to reimburse you for the handcuffs, leg irons and muzzle as well. If you could just have a couple of your orderlies assist in loading Mr. Davenport into the trunk and assisting loading it on the lorry we will be off to Happy Pines as originally planned.
Should you need to contact:
Mr. Tim Davenport
Happy Pines Sanatorium
Post Lobotomy Ward
Room 4
London
W12 OAE
Sincerely,
Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq.
Shlockman, Sueman, Kneebreaker and Stall
Attorneys at Law
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Re: Grand Opening cancellation -- Dr Barry Ronaldson Head of Care Fulchester Unit, Preston, 9/05/06 9:11pm
Dear Roger
Further to my previous message I have some good and bad news to report. The bad news is that Timothy overpowered 6 female wardens overnight and escaped by posing as a visiting probation officer. Apparently "George" the butchest of our female wardens, (you can picture the type), tatooed, muscular arms, geezers gait, and a gruff-booming voice to match, tried to administer a liquid cosh dose by intrevenous injection to Timothy, when he, (Timothy) was having none of it and punched George flush on the jaw knocking her sparko.
According to eyewitnesses the other 5 female wardens were set upon in a frenzy by deranged Timothy and were shoved unceremoneously into an empty broomcupboard.
Anyway the upshot of the story and the "good news" is that Timothy was captured later that evening by a special constable who shot Timothy with a 40,000 volt stun-gun after being warned on the police radio that Timothy was a dangerous psycopath who would stop at nothing to escape so
Jamelia (the special c)took their advice and nicked him after he was stunned into submission.
Many thanks again for kind help.
Sincerely
Dr Barry Ronaldson
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Re: Grand Opening cancellation -- Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq., 9/05/06 9:27pm
Dr. Ronaldson,
I can only advise you to keep Mr. Davenport, strapped to a handcart and manacled at all times, as you have plainly discovered he is a very, very sick individual. I will send Vladimer, Zvonimir and Pankracije over right away to collect him, Zvonimir says he has a dose of something from the "old country" that will make him as docile as a mouse. Pankracije is welding some steel plate to the lorry to prevent escape and Vladimer is rigging the special gas should Zvonimir’s plan fail.
If Mr. Davenport does try to escape again, feel free to use deadly force. Our deal still stands as we only wish what is best for Tim, and the steamer trunk full of pound notes will be your to keep no matter what.
Sincerely,
Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq.
Shlockman, Sueman, Kneebreaker and Stall
Attorneys at Law
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Re: Grand Opening cancellation -- Dr Barry Ronaldson Head of Care Fulchester Unit, Preston, 9/05/06 9:46pm
Dear Roger
I will order my staff to immediately untie Davenport from the asylum`s inner electric fence and get them to chain, manacle and weld him (if necessary) to a handcart. I think we have a suitable one, it was donated by Lady Daphne De Ponsonby-Smithers some years ago along with some paintings and
a victorian inlaid silver snuffbox, delightful little thing. Please send Vladimer, Zvonimir and Pankracije over as soon as possible to collect Davenport as I fear he may be becoming suicidal. Please also tell Zvonimir not to forget the "old country" dose.
I`m very pleased to hear that our deal still stands and trust that the steamer trunk full of pund notes will be delivered to one of my country residences again ASAP.
Sincerely
Dr Barry Ronaldson Phd, Bsc, Cantab, With Honours.
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Re: Grand Opening cancellation -- Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq., 9/05/06 11:17pm
My dear, Dr Barry Ronaldson Phd, Bsc, Cantab, With Honours,
How glad I am to hear your staff has welding equipment, as soon as your staff and Vladimer, Zvonimir and Pankracije wheel Mr. Davenport into the lorry if it would not be too much of a bother could you weld the doors shut. You might want to show Zvonimir the snuffbox as he is quite keen on snuffboxes and has a large collection himself. Just give the address where you would like the steamer trunk full of pound notes delivered an as long as things are welded up tight I am sure making delivery to your estate will not be a problem.
Do you have a supply of ether? It may be advisable to soak a mattress in ether so Tim has a good rest during transport.
It’s been a pleasure and I trust you will keep this whole business to yourself.
Sincerely,
Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq.
Shlockman, Sueman, Kneebreaker and Stall
Attorneys at Law
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