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Subject: dyslexia/arguing


Author:
LA (Frustrated)
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Date Posted: 04:25:20 02/23/11 Wed

I have a son with Dyslexia and ADD, he is 11 years old. I absolutely adore him and wish I could fix all his issues if I could. We have been very diligent over the past 5/6 years to get a diagnosis and stay on top of all his need both medically and emotionally. I constantly feel like a failure because I find myself constantly arguing with my son. I know that children with this type of diagnosis are prone to low self esteem and I don't want to add to it but sometimes it is sooo frustrating because he acts silly/bugs his younger brother and seems to push me until we have a blow up ! I end up feeling bad that I just didn't walk away from it because I end up saying things that I regret later ! I love him soo much and I don't want to add to him feeling bad about himself but it is so hard sometimes and we... both his father and try our very best but it never seems to be good enought for him ! He is a wonderful boy that I want to help and I certainly don't want to be arguing with him.....I only want to build him up ! Frustrated Mom

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Replies:
[> Subject: Re: dyslexia/arguing


Author:
Malcolm (Hope)
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Date Posted: 20:23:25 02/26/11 Sat

Hello frustrated mom.
I am now 54 years old I remember when I was a child of probably very much the same as your son. I was not interested in anything to do with school or learning I just wanted to mess around I hated school. I now know why. I would just frustrated I could not do where the children did read. Some of things I liked school is maths and history the headmaster of the school used to take us the mass he could not understand why I felt my maths exam he didn't know I could not read the questions. I just enjoy history and learning about the past. As grown-up I have found being dyslexic more a more frustrating. Seeing you need to focus on at the moment is your son. He is only frustrated the things it cannot do you need to find out what he's good at. I can assure you he is good at something. For me it's photography this is the one hobby in life always kept to. For your son it could be drawing taking pictures doing something with his hands taken a bicycle to its and reassembling it he could be good at so many things. If you look up Famers people we dyslexia you will be surprised. Princess Eugenie is one Jackie Stewart the Formula One three times champion of the world is another Whoopi Goldberg is another one Jamie Oliver. The list goes on and on and on all these people a good at something have been paid a lot of money to do what they do. So don't give up hope your son will make you proud in the end.
There are some computer programmes that could help your son. As a program ClickN KIDS they also do a spelling version you have to pay filets this is a lifetime subscription it is a fun thing for children to do each lesson only lasts 10 or 15 min you only post to do two or three lessons a week could help your child is making learning fun for people with dyslexia and do not realise they are learning I think they're just having fun that are not they are learning to.
I hope you find it useful.
Malcolm
[> Subject: Re: dyslexia/arguing


Author:
Kim Tooze
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Date Posted: 08:05:56 04/29/11 Fri

LA,
I know what you are going through, not from your prospective but from your son's. I am dyslexic and I put my parents through hell growing up. I was so tormented by my disabilities I took it out on them. My parents
were good parents, and I am very grateful that they never
gave up on me. One thing that I am very appreciate of is that didn't let me off the hook, they held my feet to the fire so to speak. I was expected to do the same work as everyone else in my class. It was frustrating, I had low self-esteem and I had to work so much harder then everyone else. However, it also meant that they thought I could do it and it gave me the conviction to keep trying. I think it would have been more scary if my parents said to me, that's ok, we know you can't do, we will let you do something easier. That would have meant to me that I really couldn't do it. My Mom worked with me every night, I would have tantrums over spelling words because I couldn't remember the spelling from one day to the next. Everything was a struggle and I felt so alone and different from my peers.
My high school years were an improvement. I was too proud to let anyone know I was dyslexic. I would get up in the middle of the night and study for hours. I was on the honor roll, a cheer leader in three different sports, captain of the volleyball team and softball team and on the leaders club. Then I would come home at night and take care of our horses. Spanish class was a nightmere for me, so finally, I let my parents get me a tutor. After that I started getting As.
I guess the main thing is to let your child know you love him too much to let him give up, and let him know he is not alone in his learning disability.
I wish him all the luck, and he can write to me if he would like. I am a PE teacher with 30 years in the profession.
Kim



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