biological father confusion -- Advices and Vices

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Subject: biological father confusion

Author:
Hayden

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Date Posted: 08:35:58 05/31/02 Fri

17 years ago my mom and her boyfriend made a mistake and here i am. as soon as John found out he was out of the picture. he told my mom to either have an abortion or he would leave here and she obviously left. then she had to find jobs because she didn't have enough money for a baby and Tom gave her a job to assist him with his jewlery making and soon he was hooked on her and they got married. this was one month before i was born. my parents have never left any informaion from me and i'm greatful for that. when i was 6 i wanted to know more about John so i sent him a letter with my picture and all and he replied saying he had two other daughtors and a wife and they are happy. then he signed it "your friend John". whatever you know, i didn't think anything of it.
then two years ago my friend died in a car accident right before christmas and we went to her memorial at our hight school and John was their because i found out he is a good friend of that family and my mom took me to see him and say hi and what not and then he made some empty promisses just like in his letter where he said he would call and take me out for lunch and get to know me and come to one of my basketball games and i was all happy and then realized it was another lie. i was looking at that letter again today and i saw how old his daughtors would be and the oldest is only a year younger than me. that took me back and now i feel like trash. like i don't belong anywhere. like it's finally come to me that he really doesn't want anything to do with me. i know it shouldn't have an effect on me because he's not my father and i have never thought of his as that, but it does and i hate it. i hate myself for letting it get to me. i can't help it.
what should i do? i mean, i'm letting it get to me and take away from me and i don't want that. i have to concentrate on other things that are more important.
if anyone could gin=ve any advice it would be greatly appreciated.
P.S. if anyone is thrown by my name, i am a girl.

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Replies:

Subject	Author	Date
Re: biological father confusion	My Advice	20:33:43 06/03/02 Mon

Re: biological father confusion	Pat Erickson	15:05:51 07/03/02 Wed
Re: biological father confusion -- feeling guilty, 21:30:01 04/07/03 Mon Re: biological father confusion -- feeling guilty, 21:31:07 04/07/03 Mon
Re: biological father confusion	Kalon	18:54:06 08/21/02 Wed

MAKE MONEY FAST AND EASY	John Hoe	15:20:40 11/07/02 Thu
Re: MAKE MONEY FAST AND EASY -- Ivan, 14:09:20 10/19/03 Sun
Re: biological father confusion	Angel	12:19:16 03/24/04 Wed