Date Posted:02:27:34 04/14/02 Sun Author: Zora Subject: Re: Untitled, Chapter Six In reply to:
novae
's message, "Untitled, Chapter Six" on 03:56:51 04/01/02 Mon
Hey novae, sorry it's taken me a while to get around to giving you feedback on these new chapters.
This needs proof reading for little mistakes; I won't bore you by pointing them out, I'm sure you'll find them.
This story just gets more exciting! I liked the sorrow that Feiln felt when Jarred was killed. I think it would be good if you explored his feelings even more, and explained why he suddenly stopped to bury Jarred when he hadn't been going to at first.
