Re: Secound time around. -- Unplanned Pregnancy Advice Board

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Subject: Re: Secound time around.

Author:
Lisa

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Date Posted: 07/29/06 8:56pm
In reply to: Chyna 's message, "Secound time around." on 07/29/06 3:25pm

Hi Chyna,

Welcome to the board and conrgratulations on your pregnancy. All of us here on the board are of the philosphy that a baby is a blessing no matter the circumstances. Most of us on here have been in your shoes. Myself included. I am 38 years old and I got pregnant with my first baby (I had one prior miscarriage) at age 35. My daughter is now 2 1/2 and she is the best thing that ever happened to me. When I got pregnant, I was in school full time, had a great apt and a good car.

I decided right away to keep my baby, and things got complicated right away. I had to quit school, move to another place and I ended up on assistance. Not a bright story, I know, but it was all worth it. I am getting back on my feet again and I have my daughter! Her father does not see her, although he was excited about her in the beginning. I do get child support and you can too.

There is much help out there for single mothers. For starters, there is WIC which will provide you with good food and free formula if you bottle feed. I got it and I was working. My daughter still gets it.

A lot of the women on here are great at finding resources. They will need your state and nearest city if you can.

If you do not want a abortion, I would not have one. I dont know how any one can survive one, more or less 2 in less than a year. You can do this and we can help you.
Chances are your dad and your boyfriend will come around. My dad was so mad when I told him (and I was 35!) He is 71 now an my daughter (his only grandchild) is the apple of his eye. The minute he saw her, he was in love. Things take time, and like the ladies on here will tell you, there is a reason we are pregnant for nine months!

Good luck to you and follow your heart!

Love,

Lisa

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[> Subject: Re: Secound time around.

Author:
Lori
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Date Posted: 07/30/06 2:45pm

Hi Chyna,

Welcome to the board. I can definitely relate to your situation. I experienced a unplanned pregnancy at the age of twenty and I can remember how scared and confused I was then. All of my friends told me to abort, my boyfriend wasn't even sure if he could handle having a child. I came from a Christian home and I was terrified that my parents would be so angry with me so I felt completely alone. I didn't know how I would be able to have a child when I still felt like a child myself. I couldnt' even support myself back then but I made the choice to keep my baby and I have never regretted my decision. I thank God everyday for helping me make the right choice.
I know you feel so much pressure right now but this is only for a little while. Eventually if you do decide to keep your baby people will accept it. I know lots of girls and women who find out their pregnant and their parents are completely upset, pressuring them to abort and those same parents who wanted their daughter to abort are completely smitten with their grandchild when their born.
When we find out were pregnant and when others find out their were pregnant everyone just seems to have a break down and start worrying about the childs future and how their going to take care of this child. But, you can take care of this child there are a lot of programs offered by many states and pregnancy centers that will help you to care for your baby. Don't make a decision about this hastily because you could make one of the biggest mistakes of your life. You can't bring this child back if you do choose to abort and no matter how many children you have in your future you will always look back and think about the child that should have been.
Were here for you no matter what you decide but I plead with you to research your options go to www.pregnancycenters.org and find a pregnancy center in your area they have a lot of information that will help you. Also, go to afterabortion.com this is a neutral site where you can hear from women who have had an abortion. We never know how we will react to anything in life every person is different but I think its important to hear from other women who have went through abortion and learn from their experiences.
I truly wish you the best, and I will be praying for you. If you ever need to talk feel free to email me any time. Please remember to make a decision that you can live with, not what your boyfriend or parents can deal with because this is your body and your baby.
If you would like to read my story please go to http://www.geocities.com/pregnancyhelpnow/continuestories.html .

God Bless,
Lori