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Date Posted: 19:15:08 05/09/02 Thu
Author: Celeste Riceburg
Subject: ...Well If You Say What You Mean and Mean What You Say, How Could I Disagree?...
In reply to: Julian Emberson 's message, "it's what i meant." on 18:45:19 05/09/02 Thu

...Celeste stared at him, wondering if he was just palying clueless, or if he really was. "What we don't deserve, we don't get" she quoted frigidly. "Like I didn't interpret that, Julian I might not be as smart as you are...but I am NOT stupid. Especially after what I had just said to you, it was os easy to uncover. You didn't even try to be nice about it through your voice that was so plainly filled with some..anger, and from where Julian? Where? Where and why? I've made a fool of myself...all year, haven't I? Following you, molding myself, making me into so many different people...trying to find myself, I thought that was what you wanted. But I've been so many different people this year I don't know Celeste. Do you? Because I seem to have lost her, looking for something...someone I thought I...loved," she said her voice starting out acidy and slowly moving to a sad, wistful whsiper. "I thought I knew you Julian, that no matter what I could keep on going, keep on trying to be..well, to be blunt with you. I thought I would give up but your words...your face, made me resilient. Now I'm just lost because of what you said to me...I've been trying to hard for to long...and now I know that I can't have what I want, where do I go? And so Julian, I don't hate you...I just don't understand you. It's like you won't let anything good happen to you!...

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