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Date Posted: 14:41:34 10/23/03 Thu
Author: NRB
Subject: I have backslidden!

A few hours ago, one of my ladyfriends called me up and asked if she could come over so we could screw each other raw. I couldn't help it. Within the hour, we were half-naked on my smooth cherry-wood desktop, engaged in terrible, sweaty sin. As soon as we were finished, I realized how I'd failed, and, seized by the Holy Spirit, slapped the shit out of her; I rebuked her for tempting me and causing me to backslide. She ran out of the office in tears.

But, alas, friends, that was not the end of it. Depressed over my backsliding, I decided to pour the 1/4 bottle of MSIR I have left down the drain; but I accidentally and unknowingly spilled some into my orange juice. This had to be the work of Satan. I drank the OJ, and within an hour, I was high as a kite, and had forgotten all about Jesus and Looper. But they had not forgotten about me. Jesus appeared with a cup in his hand and said: "Drink of this." I did; it was narcan, and suddenly my morphine-induced glow was gone and I was back in the arms of the Lord again.

I just wanted to share this story with you all.

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