To satisfy curious minds -- Zack's Friends

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Subject: To satisfy curious minds

Author:
Vanessa

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Date Posted: 09:32:23 12/13/02 Fri
In reply to: Terri 's message, "I DEFINITELY Listen About the Past!" on 09:10:18 12/13/02 Fri

I gave up/lost custody of Rudy after I had a my first miscarriage. I felt so worthless and thought it was my fault because I had doubts about wanting the child because of the circumstance. I still feel guilty about losing that child. It took a long time for me to get over that.

During that time period, I was a mess. I gave Rudys dad temp custody because I felt I wasn't good enough to be a mother. I wasn't able to take care of myself much less Rudy. He decided to use the opportunity to take permanent custody and I didn't fight it. I wanted to, but given my situation at the time, I was being told by my family and friends that I shouldn't. I listened to them and my heart.

I have to admit that it was for the best. They were able to provide a loving stable home during a time when I haven't been stable. That doesn't mean I don't love Rudy. That doesn't mean that I won't be there for Rudy. But at this point, I think there would be a level of harm in removing him from their care. I would only consider it in a serious situation.

So that's the story. I hope no one thinks any less of me!

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Replies:

Subject	Author	Date
Thank you for sharing	Terri	09:40:34 12/13/02 Fri

Re: To satisfy curious minds	Marsha & Trista	18:24:41 12/13/02 Fri