Re: i just dont understand -- Post Abortion Healing Support

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Subject: Re: i just dont understand

Author:
Kris

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Date Posted: 10:26:39 08/23/05 Tue
In reply to: kasey 's message, "i just dont understand" on 02:44:54 08/22/05 Mon

Dear Kasey,

Yes, relationships can make it after traumatic events - but you need to "deal" with that trauma in healthy ways. Not talking about it or "stuffing" the emotions will only cause problems down the road. Both you and your boyfriend are hurting from the abortion and you need to be able to talk about it. If someone goes around acting like something never happened, that is a defense mechanism meant to protect themselves - try to understand that. Sure it makes you mad, but he can't face what he's feeling about the whole thing and that's very typical for a guy.

I would like to suggest you go to some post abortion counseling - usually a Crisis Pregnancy Center in your area will offer FREE sessions - please look up one in your area - you can use this link:

http://www.optionline.org/advantage.asp

or look in your phone book under Abortion Alternatives

You can also visit this site:

http://www.safehavenministries.com/

They are wonderful and have lots of message boards for women who have had abortions.

The sad fact is that the majority of relationships are destroyed after an abortion, but there is hope! The guilt, hurt and anger are just too much to deal with. That is something Pro-Choice advocates will never admit to, but it's true. I am sorry you are finding out the hard way. I hope the little bit of info. I've offered helps.

Hugs, Kris

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[> Subject: Re: i just dont understand

Author:
lauren
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Date Posted: 00:47:21 08/30/05 Tue

you know what, that isnt crazy to say. im in the same situation. the only people that know i had an abortion is my boyfriedn and my parents. but they all act like nothing happened.. and if i say something, its like they dont know what to say to me so they change the subject. it makes me really pissed. makes me resentful towards my boyfriend, because its almost like i feel he did it to me. you know what i mean? and then you feel like you're being dramatic when you get upset about it.. but.. i dotn know, its definitely a touchy subject. but you're not the only one that feels liek that... if that helps at all.