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Date Posted: 18:58:37 01/25/04 Sun
Author: Jenifer
Subject: Okay, why are we feeling guilty here?
In reply to: Heather S. 's message, "I made it through the week" on 20:00:28 01/24/04 Sat

I'm sorry if you ladies have come across some nosy women who feel they can tell you how to run your homes, but please don't put that label on the Church. The Church teaches that the primary place for the woman is in the home. Mothers should only go to work if there is a real need. If you both have evaluated your family situation and know that is what you have to do, then you are following what the church teaches.

Now, if you feel that is not the case, then that is something that needs to be prayfully taken up with the Lord jointly with your DH. Otherwise, enjoy what you do. Make sure your children are in righteous environments and don't beat yourselves up over this.

I know being away from the kids is hard, that will not change. But you shouldn't feel "guilty" because you are doing the best you can.

My DH and I made the decision before we got married that I would stay home and we have sacrificed a lot to make that happen. I even tried a few ways of earning money and looked into jobs I could do at home. I was let know through the Spirit, that was not The Lord's will in our life and every effort in that direction has been thwarted. That is me and my family, our prayerful decision was for me to stay home. Your situation may be different. I have several friends who are in the work force. They wish it was different, but the answer to their prayers said it was necessary.

My hat goes off to any woman who can keep a household running and work. It's more than I can do most days to keep up with my house and kids while I'm home. Love those kids, but know you are doing the best you can.

Jenifer,
Mother to six earth angels and seven angels in Heaven.
Our newest angel left us Dec. 5, 2003.
We miss you Anna Marie!

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Replies:

[> DH and I too made the decision for me to stay home -- lynece, 22:32:47 01/25/04 Sun

before we were married, and that is why I do feel guilty. I have been blessed and no one has ever said anything to me, plus teaching is one of those jobs that it seems OK for women to have. I never planned on working full time again or at least until the kids were in school full time as well. I do know it was the answer to our situation. Without my salary I'm not sure what we would do and I'm very grateful to have a job that I really enjoy and am good at.

I think it is the Utah mentality. I have not noticed it in other areas of the country and even the world, like I do here. It is a real double standard here. And every lesson you get about how women should be at home just makes it harder.

I don't always think I'll feel this bad about it, especially when I feel better and as time goes on. But having to work when you don't want to, but have to is just hard all around.

L.


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