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Date Posted: 02:42:21 04/20/01 Fri
Author: Jessica
Subject: k, i guess i should do one for myself, since it was my idea in the first place .... and i don't wanna set any bad examples or anything....


I see: my computer screen, cuz i'm the shit and i don't have to look at the keys when i type, EAH

I need: to get the hell out of this dress that i tried on to show my mom ... but then i saw that jay was online, and i've been sitting here at the computer ever since... I also need sleep cuz my eyes are stinging really really badly and crying makes me tired. but it's ok now, i promise.

I find: it hard to believe that people can act the way they do sometimes, yet claim that they're being mature about things ...

I want: to go to boston. like, NOW. cuz jay's coming with me, and it's gonna be so fucking cool. and i want high school to fucking end.

I have: to put my skirt that i'm wearing to school tomorrow in the dryer cuz it's wrinkled and i don't feel like ironing right now.

I wish: i could sleep in jay's arms tonight ... and that nothing was EVER wrinkled cuz wrinkles WAY SUCK

I love: duh, Jay. and Lisa Loeb too. and Winona Ryder cuz she's way hot and way a good actress. but Jay the way mostest.

I miss: my grandma... she's all the way over in portugal and i haven't seen in her in a way long time ... i miss my sister too ...

I fear: hah, clowns. and mrs. mccormick cuz she always gives me way scary looks every time i go visit jay and lauren 4th period.

I feel: like eating some ice cream. i also feel drained.

I smell: my snot-infested nostrils cuz i was crying and now they're all clogged up with crying-snots

I think: that girls who go tanning too much look really really ugly. and it's just.... not attractive. at all. it's actually kinda funny, though. like that one girl who's in my lunch, who's like charred and blackened cuz she so overly tans, but then she's got these buck teeth, and she like bleaches her hair and it's all nappy crimpy wavy disgusting, and sean said he saw her once with bleached eyebrows too, and the contrast of that girl just boggles me and ... she's way scary. and i saw her in the mall tonight and i wanted to run away really quickly but then i decided i better not.

I crave: attention. like, all the time. like, overly crave it. like, need-it-to-function crave it.

I wonder: what it's like to have a penis.

I regret: some of the friends i've made in the past. some of the choices those "friends" have caused me to make. mostly everything i've done. i also regret starting smoking ... cuz now it's hard to stop.


Right now, I feel like: floating (and by the way guys, like, NONE of you put in a verb like i said to!)

Right now, I hear: my heart beating in my head way hard, and the little heater next to me

I just don't understand: like i said - girls who go tanning. and my mom. and lots of stuff. and the attraction to things like rollercoasters and skydiving and making yourself throw up and tanning and crimped hair and fuschia eyeshadow and myself.

I like Jessica Martins because: hey. i don't like jessica martins. she sucks way a lot.



k ... i suck. bye.

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